S.R. Crawford's Blog, page 96

Book Recommendation

List of Self Care Practices

Meet up with a friend
Watch a great TV show
Relax
Have a bath
Yoga
Meditation
Healthy Meal
Your Favourite meal
Exercise
Write
Speak about your feelings
Play a game
Run
Do a sport
Do a puzzle
READ
Plant something
Clean up
Buy a new outfit
Watch a film
Read a self help book
Dress well
Ask yourself how you feel
Gratitude journal
Laugh
Go for a walk
Nap
Have a cup of tea
Drink lots of water
Music
Pamper yourself
Disconnect from the tech world for a while
Write a letter to yourself or someone (you don’t have to send it)
Do your hair and nails
Mindfulness
Try something new
Stretch
Declutter
See someone you love
Go out
Snuggle with your pet
Positive affirmation and vibes
Eat out
Have a take away
Watch something funny
Binge watch your favourite Netflix show
Reconnect with your inner child
Write a list of things that make you happy
Get a massage
Self respect
Look in the mirror and appreciate what you see
Hug your mom (or a motherly figure)

 

“What Depression and Anxiety Means to Me” – Elizabeth

(This is a writing piece/explanation of anxiety and depression done by a frequent visitor at my Anxiety and Depression support group after I asked them all “what anxiety and depression means to them”.)

Anxiety:

A constant voice in your head telling you what you’re gonna do wrong or assuming the worst of every situation, which prevents you from wanting to ever enter certain situations to try and protect yourself from a potential problem that in the end is very unlikely to happen. It can spiral out of control and cause panic attacks, crying, flashbacks, nightmares etc. It can come at any time unless you recognise that it’s there, you can feel lost and confused inside your own head.

Anxiety causes my emotions to be unstable and because of this I’m very wary of social situations as my brain is overwhelmed by everything. I automatically plan an escape route when I enter a building. I feel a horrible pit in my stomach form and have to hide somewhere, like the toilets, just to recover. I always try to put on a front and act like I’m okay when I’m really not. This can make me come off as quiet, distant and unfriendly. When I do open up I feel much safer, less threatened and relieved.

 

Depression:

A heavy black feeling like you’re stuck under a dense fog and you’re not able to move easily, getting out of bed is difficult and your brain is assaulting you. You cry over the tiniest things and that just makes you feel worse, other people view it as you being lazy.

Depression has stopped me regularly from having a “normal” life, it causes me to feel unworthy, like anything I do is pointless so I shouldn’t do anything anyway. Just recently I had a horrible week, where I basically laid around in bed all day, sometimes falling asleep in the middle of the day, I watched TV and either starved myself or binge ate.

 

Early Warning Signs of Depression

What I Am Not – Poem

I am not my anxiety,

The illness of my mind.

I am not my fears,

Though they make me blind.

I am not my body,

With it’s lacking curve,

I am not my race,

 Which tries to determine what I deserve.

I am not my gender,

With my long hair and breasts.

I am not my height,

So I will finish the quest.

I am not my grades,

With the As, Bs and C.

I am not my clothes,

Though they make me free.

I am not my dreams,

Though they guide me.

I am not my pay checks,

Though they are key.

I am not my words,

They come out all wrong.

I am not my likes,

Though the list is real long.

I am not my postcode,

With the less than impressive neighbours.

I am not my things,

The films, the merch and the sabers.

I am not my sex life,

I keep that to myself.

I am not my day to day,

With its lacking wealth.

Don’t try to judge me,

By the things you think you know.

The only way to know me,

Is to just say “hello”.

Keeping you all up to date

So what am I up to? What should you expect? Well, at the moment, I’m working on a self-help book called “What I Know So Far”, which is an autobiography of my life, with an emphasis on the ups and downs and pain of it. This is all in the way of helping others to keep going despite setbacks and failure and loss. It is to encourage people to see the wondrous mystery of the universe and how pain helps us learn life lessons, not break us.

 

The third book in the Eternity series, “When Worlds Collide”, has been started but I won’t be writing it properly just yet. I plan to start around April, maybe sooner though, we’ll see. Stay tuned for teasers from that!

 

Much love, speak soon!

A List of People You Need in Your Life

You will need all kinds of people at different walks in your life. They will each bring you something that you need in order to become the you that you were always destined to be. But we shouldn’t just let people walk all over our lives. We should be mindful of who is around us – because toxic people have a tendency to overstay their welcome.

So I’ve devised a list here of the people that everyone should have met and learn from in a lifetime.

A Challenger
A Fun Maker
A Mother – doesn’t need to be related, they just need to feel like a mother
A Father – doesn’t need to be related, they just need to feel like a father
A Sibling – doesn’t need to be related, they just need to feel like a brother or sister
A Partner in Crime
An Eye Opener
An Honest Guy
An Animal (I know this technically isn’t a person but my cat is in the room with me, so…)
A Weirdo
A Nerd
A Genius
A Pessimist
A Reader
A Mr. Positivity (or Miss)
A Fool
An Ill Person
A Philosopher
A Film Buff
An Organised Person
A Straight Talker
A Smooth Talker
A Beauty
A Liar
 A Thrill-Seeker
A Loser
A Chef or A Foodie
An Athlete
A Player
A Gamer
A Gossip
A Winner
A Copy and Paste of You
An Artist
A Wordsmith
A Animal Enthusiast
A Know it All
A Anxious Person
A Shopaholic
A “Shall we watch Netflix” Person
A Wizard (someone who just makes things happen and you have no idea how)
A Light Weight
A Party Animal
A “Did you get home safe” Friend
A Rich Person
A Poor Person
An Outdoors-man (they don’t need to be actually male)
A B*tch
An Angel
A “I’m always here if you need to talk” Friend – but they actually mean it
 A Traveller

There are so many people in this world. So, so many. For us to ever feel alone is just crazy! There are people like us out there, and sometimes it’s not people like us that we need, it’s instead the people on this list.

These people each have a role to play in shaping you into the healthy adult that you want to be. To be a well-rounded individual. They will help you think differently. To see the world through a new lens. Don’t shy away from these people. Let them in, let them help you learn something, and then take the lessons with you.

Seek People. Seek Experiences. Seek Peace.

What Does it Mean to Better Yourself?

What Are Emotions? What Are They Really?

For some reason or another, we think emotions are bad things. That especially men shouldn’t show emotion. But I don’t think that most of us truly understand emotions, never mind our own. The weird thing is, emotions are way more complex than any of us may ever realise. It’s not just happy or sad – it’s more than that.

Way more.

It’s weird how we can confuse what emotions are. Like moodiness isn’t an emotion, it’s a behaviour towards an emotion (which would probably be upset or frustration). Actually, I’m not sure that upset is an emotion. I think you feel upset if you feel something else first, like disappointment, anger, loss, dissatisfaction, pain or regret. Basically any negative emotion can lead to you feeling upset, which again would be a reaction to another emotion, not necessarily an emotion within itself!

There are many different theories about what constitutes emotion. The first one I found was Robert Plutchik’s theory, naming 8 basic emotions: joy, sadness, anger, jealousy, trust, disgust, anticipation, and surprise.

Then there’s Aristotle, who suggests these: Anger, Friendship, Fear, Shame, Kindness, Pity, Indignation, Envy, and Love.

Lastly, I found what is called The Engineered Language – Lojban:

Simple emotions

discovery
envy
wonder
happiness – sadness
amusement
courage
pity




Complex emotions

pride
closeness
complaint/pain – doing average – pleasure
caution
patience
relaxation – composure – stress
envy – goodwill


Pure emotions

fear
togetherness
respect
appreciation
love
hope
confusion

The last theory is a little more complex than that in reality, but basically that’s what it suggested. However, which one is right? I can’t say for sure. But to me, these are all right, and more.

Emotions are feelings. They’re deep feelings that govern how we think or act a lot of the time. I believe that emotions are a part of our minds but also our soul/spirit. Ever had a feeling that you didn’t understand? Well, that’s because they’re not always logical, but instead come from somewhere deep within. Emotions can be a great guide for us, and when we understand them, we better understand ourselves.

Basic Emotions, Basic Definitions:

Joy: happiness, elation

Sadness: low mood, sorrow

Anger: frustration, high irritation or vexation

Jealousy: wanting something that someone else has

Affection: love, appreciation, kind feelings towards something/someone

 

The More Complex Emotions, Basic Definitions:

Fear: frightened of something

Love: strong affection, and connection

Hate: strong dislike or anger towards something/someone

Trust: believing someone is honest and worthy of your true self

Relief: happy when a negative passes

Excitement: happiness when anticipating something

Irritation: frustration or anger over something

Friendship: a bond with someone that feels positive

Pain: an aching of the heart, mind, body or spirit

Regret: a negative feeling after doing something you think you should/shouldn’t have done

Pleasure: a highly positive or stimulating feeling whilst experiencing something you like

Familiarity: when something/someone feels familiar or recognisable

Bond: a strong connection of attachment to something/someone

Absence: the feeling that something is missing

Confusion: not understanding something clearly

Loss: when something is not longer with you

Disappointment: when an expectation is not fulfilled

Pride: ego or feeling proud of something

Loneliness: feeling very negatively alone

Belonging: feeling as though you are a part of something, social identity, community

Comfort: feeling at ease

Reserved: keeping oneself closed off

Understanding: when you know something or can appreciate a concept

Accomplishment: when you do well and it feels good

Satisfaction: when something is pleasing and fulfilling

 

Are there any emotions that I missed? Let me know if so! There were so many that I thought of once I got into it. There is more going on with our emotions that we realise. We all focus too much on happy and sad that we forget about the rest. But when you understand and appreciate the affects of these other emotions, you start to understand your true self. Why you do what you do. Why you feel what you feel.

And this is crucial to a healthy mind and spirit.

Good luck, be aware of your emotions and begin understanding them.

Seek Peace.

 

 

 

Introducing my Self Help Books to be Published 2017!