Tony Fahkry's Blog, page 35

This Is Why Working Harder On Yourself Than Your Job Is The Key To A Great Fortune

A Powerful Inner Resolve

“If you work on your job, you’ll make a living. If you work on yourself, you’ll make a fortune.” — Jim Rohn

The late American motivational speaker Jim Rohn knew something many people don’t: success is an inside job.

A good deal of your future success will arise from your mindset.

It is no surprise that those who are successful encounter frequent setbacks and failures.

To the uninitiated, failure may represent the absence of success. However, the person with a growth mindset knows failure is an opportunity to improve on their last attempt, drawing them closer to success.

If success is a journey then it comprises valleys and peaks, notwithstanding the many setbacks.

Gary Keller and Jay Papasan write in The One Thing: The Surprisingly Simple Truth Behind Extraordinary Results: “Extraordinary results aren’t built solely on extraordinary results. They’re built on failure too. In fact, it would be accurate to say that we fail our way to success.”

The key to success lies in your willingness and determination to prevail, even in the face of adversity. It is an inner knowing, despite evidence to the contrary, that you will overcome your obstacles and silence your critics.

The right mindset and a powerful inner resolve are required on the path to success.

Setbacks are not intended to discourage you from attaining victory. They are orchestrated to enrich your personal growth and lead you closer to success if you stay the distance.

Working harder on yourself than your job requires paying attention to your mindset and nurturing your inner most thoughts.

Every failure, every obstacle draws you closer to the person you must become to realise victory.

Success is the sum of your personal growth. The person who attains outstanding success has cultivated their inner world and surmounted the challenges imposed upon them.

“Success builds on success, and as this happens, over and over, you move toward the highest success possible,” write Gary Keller and Jay Papasan.

Upgrade Your Mindset

“The greatest gift you can give somebody is your own personal development. I used to say, “If you will take care of me, I will take care of you. Now I say, I will take care of me for you, if you will take care of you for me.” — Jim Rohn

Those who work hard on themselves instead of their job are invested in their personal development. They are committed to reading books, attending seminars and lectures, working with the right coaches and mentors and are lifelong learners.

They are humble in the face of victory and gracious in defeat. They realise life is about constant learning, developing and nurturing their greatest asset — themselves.

They do not have all the answers, but are willing to step out of their comfort zone and try new things, knowing the slightest information will create a snowball effect in terms of success when the time is right.

It was the French poet Victor Hugo who once said: “Nothing is more powerful than an idea whose time has come.”

The person who works hard on themselves is a leader who helps others succeed before them. They understand that in giving, they receive greater abundance and prosperity. This is a universal law and principle that whatever you sow, you shall reap.

A job pays you wages and if you are involved in sales, a commission. Nevertheless, it was Jim Rohn who reiterated in his talks: “Profits are better than wages.”

He understood that when a person develops their greatest asset and their innate strengths, he or she can create unlimited income. A wage is the fee you receive set by your employer, based on the exchange of services rendered.

Profits are unlimited only by your earning potential.

Jeff Olson explains in The Slight Edge: “Every day, in every moment, you get to exercise choices that will determine whether or not you will become a great person, living a great life. Greatness is not something predetermined, predestined or carved into your fate by forces beyond your control. Greatness is always in the moment of the decision.”

As you upgrade your mindset, so too does your bottom line.

Many people are unwilling to develop their greatest assets because they need certainty in their lives by way of a weekly income. It is this want for security that is their downfall because the harder you work on yourself, the greater your fortune because the sky is the limit.

You will only soar as high as you believe yourself capable of.

Therefore, your self-worth will determine your net worth.

As you develop a superior mindset, your net worth skyrockets because you are invested in your greatness, which yields far greater returns on your income.

The greatest fortunes are those developed over time, because success is a journey and requires staying the course.

Success requires a growth mindset that leads to the greatest victory and fortunes.

It is the pay-off of devoting time and energy on yourself, rather than simply working harder in your job.

The post This Is Why Working Harder On Yourself Than Your Job Is The Key To A Great Fortune appeared first on Tony Fahkry.

Here Are 5 Of The Most Powerful Ways To Stop Holding On To The Pain Of The Past

Emotional Unrest

“Renew, release, let go. Yesterday’s gone. There’s nothing you can do to bring it back. You can’t “should’ve” done something. You can only DO something. Renew yourself. Release that attachment. Today is a new day!” – Steve Maraboli

Imagine life without the disorganised thoughts playing out inside your head. Imagine a state of peaceful thoughts which come and go like the ocean tides – without struggle, pain or resistance.

Are you holding on to painful memories which you find difficult to let go of? Many people remain unconscious to these memories until they overwhelm them.

Holding on to pain may be akin to clutching hot coal wishing that you don’t get burnt. Each time a painful memory is recalled, it is brought to life by inviting the past into the present.

Have you experienced a moment throughout the day, when for no apparent reason you are drawn into a bad mood? Mood swings represent the unconscious self recalling past memories.

When we least expect it negative emotions such as anger, frustration, anxiety and sadness emerge. For some people holding onto pain signifies a badge of honour – it identifies them as one who has been victimised. They wear their badge to mark their identity and as a means to justify their victimhood.

In order to harness the richness of life we must be willing to let go of our pain. We must drop the story that accompanies the pain. This begins with the desire to release the pain and suffering in order to allow the new, fresh and expansive energy of life to permeate through our being.

By no means does this underscore the gravity of what occurred in the past. You are choosing not to carry the burden of the pain in the present moment and future. When we identify with our pain, we view the world through a distorted lens.

Those fleeting moments of joy and happiness are lost to a mind which has spent years drawing on painful memories. You may have come across people who carry their victimhood with them.

They use any opportunity to go to war with others when life does not play their tune. I see this frequently while shopping. Whilst standing in line I notice there may be only one checkout operator processing customer’s purchases. The checkout operator grows distressed at the growing queue of people standing in line yet is unable to go any faster.

A person standing in queue quickly grows impatient for being made to wait more than necessary. Suddenly they incite tension among other shoppers by rallying those who identified with their plight.

This example is an all too common experience in everyday life. It illustrates how minor situations can derail us and cause mental and emotional unrest.

Who Would You Be Without Your Story?

“When we think we have been hurt by someone in the past, we build up defences to protect ourselves from being hurt in the future. So the fearful past causes a fearful future and the past and future become one. We cannot love when we feel fear…. When we release the fearful past and forgive everyone, we will experience total love and oneness with all.” ― Gerald G. Jampolsky

It takes a great deal of energy to keep the past alive. The mental and emotional resources required could be better spent on other rewarding life experiences. Over time and if left untreated, painful memories have the capacity to transform into psychosomatic illnesses.

Mental health professionals believe it takes approximately one and a half minutes for the body to process an emotion. Knowing this we needn’t hold onto mental and emotional pain from the past, nor do we need to carry it with us for years.

Simply dealing with the emotion as it arises allows it to move through the body in a shorter amount of time and without the long term physiological effects.

Oftentimes people hold on to their pain for so long that it forms a safety blanket. They would feel lost without the pain and suffering. Afterall, they would have no story to tell. Perhaps others might find them uninteresting.

Who would they be without their story?

Bad things happen to good people every day. They have happen to good people all throughout human history.

One need only look to the concentration camps in Nazi Germany during the war to see the devastation it had on the lives of so many innocent people. Despite the brutality, one man emerged in his personal statement against his aggressors.

Viktor Frankl’s quote highlights our power to transform external life’s events into meaningful personal victories. He reminds us: “Everything can be taken from a man but one thing: the last human freedoms – to choose one’s attitude in any given set of circumstances, to choose one’s own way.”

In order to release your pain, make an inner declaration to choose peace, happiness and freedom – even if you don’t know how. Once you abide by this affirmation, the healing process has already begun and your unconscious mind will naturally move toward a state of peacefulness through your thoughts.

You owe it to yourself and your loved ones to release yourself from the mental prison that has held you captive all this time. I can assure you that life is far richer without the burden of pain memories.

The Real Story Of Your Authenticity

“When one door closes another door opens; but we so often look so long and so regretfully upon the closed door, that we do not see the ones which open for us.” — Alexander Graham Bell

Victims never heal – they simply carry the wounded victim title around showcasing it to people who will listen to their plight. It makes them feel acknowledged they have suffered an indignity.

Yet if you continue to feed and perpetuate this story, your mind naturally becomes accustomed to it by buying into it. That’s why affirmations work – anything repeated often and with emotional intensity has the power to transform the subconscious mind and thus bring life to the thought.

The mind thrives on creating a storyline to substantiate what it sees or experiences. Yet awareness has the experience well before the mind has had time to create a thought to validate it.

In his book Simply Notice: Clear Awareness Is the Key To Happiness, Love and Freedom, author Peter Francis Dziuban reinforces the idea of the mind seeking to add commentary to your life’s experiences: “Before something can clearly be seen or perceived for what it is, thinking is already adding judgements and commentary, acting like a smoke screen.”

Therefore if you constantly create a narrative around your emotional experiences, the mind creates a smoke screen as the author suggests to conceal what is really taking place beneath the surface.

In time the real self becomes obscured by this screen since you have bought in to a false facade instead of the real story of your authenticity.

To create a new and more empowering future requires that you create a space in your life to heal the past and release the pain.

In order to release the pain you must be willing to engage the following attributes towards carving out a path towards inner peace and freedom.

1. Commitment

“Let go. Why do you cling to pain? There is nothing you can do about the wrongs of yesterday. It is not yours to judge. Why hold on to the very thing which keeps you from hope and love?” — Leo Buscaglia

A person who has undergone mental and emotional trauma may find it difficult to let go of their suffering. They protect themselves by erecting an emotional barrier which distances them from having to feel the emotions again or relive the mental anguish of the pain.

Unfortunately the mind becomes astute at creating a barrier that in time it becomes impenetrable to deal with the emotional wounds. Your commitment to healing the past by letting go of these wounds if the first step in reconciling with the past.

The commitment heralds the process of facing the past by bringing unresolved issues to the surface in order to heal them. The challenge posed with honouring this commitment arises when confronting the pain, since this can be overwhelming at first.

We must take refuge that to heal the past we must be willing to push through the pain, since pain is where personal growth and healing resides.

Without it we continue to conceal the pain by using whatever means to keep us from facing the past. This may mean resorting to stimulants or unconducive behaviour which acts to distract us from the real issue.

Once the commitment is made, trust that your healing process had already begun through your willingness to face the past.

2. Acknowledge The Pain

“I don’t regret difficulties I experienced; I think they helped me to become the person I am today. I feel the way a warrior must feel after years of training; he doesn’t remember the details of everything he learned, but he knows how to strike when the time is right.” — Paolo Coelho

Masking pain may work for the short-term, yet it does not address the underlying issue. It would be akin to applying band aid to a gushing wound hoping the blood would stop. The deep wound may require stitches and further medical care in order to properly heal.

Acknowledging the pain invites you to feel the emotions connected to the pain, rather than stuff them down hoping that will go away.

Remember: what you resist, persists.

The energy expended towards stuffing down unwanted emotions far exceeds the energy required to heal the emotion. Resistance is a stone wall which overshadows our best intentions to thrive and prosper.

We resist how life should unfold, since we are caught up in a mental and emotional battle to make sense of reality.

What if I told you there’s another way?

What if you did not have to carry the scars of the past with you any longer?

What if instead of waging battle against the currents of life, you simply went along with it?

In his book When Everything Changes, Change Everything, author Neale Donald Walsch offers us the wisdom that life is our soul’s calling towards its own self-discovery.

Those untoward events serve not to punish us, yet to reveal your deepest wisdom. Untoward events and circumstances do not need to happen TO YOU.

Dealing with discomfort and pain may be confronting, although life is cyclical and everything must come to an end; even pain. Therefore instead of running away from your emotions, lean into them by experiencing them fully.

This in itself will transform your fear, anxiety or anger. Let go of what you believe life owes you and step into your challenges.

Rise to them armed with courage and a compassionate heart. Maintain confidence that you have been presented with an experience from which to personally evolve.

3. Acceptance

“Only by acceptance of the past can you alter it.” — T.S. Eliot

Everyone encounters pain throughout their life. To sail through life without the contrasting emotional intensities would be to deny your personal growth. Character is formed under difficult circumstances, much like a diamond is formed under heat and pressure.

Pain and suffering begins in childhood and continues throughout life. What people do with inner wounds that stem from pain will determine their attitude and actions throughout life.

Inner wounds trigger some to persecute themselves. They believe, “I must deserve this” or “I’ll never be good enough” and yet it is this way of thinking which keeps them in a state of unworthiness.

We can be hard on ourselves since we fail to respect our past and its accompanying pain need not be viewed as scars any longer. You are not a wounded soul because of your emotional experiences. You become the wounded victim when you repeatedly use those wounds to deflect from attending to the real pain inside.

By accepting the past rather than run away from it, you build a bridge which connects to your future self. The future self delights in bringing you the emotional resources you need to heal this very moment instead of bringing the past and present baggage into the future.

Imagine taking a train ride from one side of the country to one another and insisting on stopping over in each city to pick up souvenirs. By the end of your journey not only would you be broke, the amount of energy required to haul your suitcases filled with souvenirs would be physically taxing.

So it is with holding on to your pain. Acceptance does not deny you the pain incurred, it merely shines a light on the cracks so as to integrate them back into the wholeness of your being.

4. Releasing

“The past was always there, lived inside of you, and it helped to make you who you were. But it had to be placed in perspective. The past could not dominate the future.” ― Barbara Taylor Bradford, Unexpected Blessings

Emotional pain of the past can be held within the body if left unattended. A number of doctors have documented how emotions can cause a host of physical symptoms in the body.

Notably Dr John Sarno and Dr Don Colbert have written extensively on how toxic emotions have the capacity to manifest as physical pain.

They outline how emotions seek expression through you and if pushed down, will manifest in the body system. Releasing your emotional pain should be met with compassion. You are letting go of the pain and hurt with an open and loving heart in order to cleanse and make peace with the past.

The releasing process may be approached in a number of ways. For some working with a trained mental health professional might be the best decision so as to gentle release the pain gradually over time.

The skilled professional will deal with each situation individually, as some people may hold deeper emotional wounds than others, especially if there has been physical abuse. Others might turn to a spiritual leader within their community for healing. One’s faith in the healing process is paramount and will guide the person to gradually let go and surrender their emotional pain over time.

Mixed feelings may surface during the process as well as physical changes in the body, owing to the person purging themselves of the emotional burden carried all these years.

Dr Sarno describes healing back pain in hundreds of his patients who conveyed the emotions of anger and anxiety. Similarly Dr Colbert outlined how unforgiveness and betrayal had cause heart disease in a number of his patients who were unwilling to forgive.

As you release the emotional wounds of the past, a lightness fills your body and mind – a weight is shifted off your shoulders. This is the weight of carrying the disempowering emotions all this time.

5. Forgiveness

“The act of forgiveness is the act of returning to present time. And that’s why when one has become a forgiving person, and has managed to let go of the past, what they’ve really done is they’ve shifted their relationship with time.” — Caroline Myss

Forgiveness entails forgiving oneself as well as the other person. We are co-creators of our life’s experience. Acknowledging this means no longer having to play victim to all that transpires in our life.

There is power knowing life need not happen to us rather that it flows through us. As we create empowering choices which are aligned with our spiritual truth, we trust life functions perfectly within the container of universal wisdom.

We have faith that each experience serves a purpose in our personal evolution and once the lesson has been attained, we release and surrender it with openness to what will fill its place.

Your belief that you have performed “bad” actions in the past and the ensuing guilt is a flawed assumption which must be examined. A bad act does not define someone as being bad.

Your natural state consists of wholeness and goodness since you were not conceived in the image of evil. It is your thinking which discolours your perception that a bad act in the past must be punished accordingly.

Therefore as you heal the inner conflict contained within the inaccurate belief, you see self-forgiveness is possible and you need not persecute yourself any longer.

Furthermore if you search deeper within you will see that your intentions at the time were vested in self-preservation.

Our actions arise from the human instinct to take care of oneself at all times, therefore your actions were imbued with self-love rather than harm to others. Self-forgiveness should be viewed as a process which gradually opens the door to healing and allows us to surrender to life enacting her will through us.

We invite the healing energy of love which resides within us to permeate throughout our being. It is always there yet we conceal it by perpetuating a false myth of our guilt instead of our innocence.

The post Here Are 5 Of The Most Powerful Ways To Stop Holding On To The Pain Of The Past appeared first on Tony Fahkry.

This Is The Single Biggest Thing You Can Do If You Want To Lose Weight

Thoughts and Emotions Influence Your Health

“While weight loss is important, what’s more important is the quality of food you put in your body – food is information that quickly changes your metabolism and genes.” — Mark Hyman

The Scottish whisky distiller Thomas Dewar once said: “Minds are like parachutes; they work best when open.”

I want you to keep an open mind during the next five minutes it will take you to read this piece.

I want to introduce an idea that will prove helpful if you want to lose weight and improve your body composition.

Self-help health experts remind us to refrain from using language such as losing weight due to its symbolic connection to the weight returning. You ‘release’ unwanted body fat they’ll have you know.

However, for the sake of this article I’m referring to it as weight loss so as not to confuse the reader.

Why am I qualified to talk about this topic?

I began my career as a personal trainer many years ago, before transitioning to writing and speaking about health and self-empowerment.

In that capacity, I was fortunate to work with thousands of people who lost weight and kept it off while regaining their health.

How?

I discovered a principle in their journey and my own around the key role thoughts and emotions play in regulating our health.

I wrote a book titled: The Power To Navigate Life: Your Journey To Freedom, endorsed by the internationally acclaimed author Dr. Eldon Taylor. It equally received praise from Australia’s leading clinical psychologist and neuropsychologist, Dr. Roy Sugarman.

The book formed the basis of a program I presented to corporate companies throughout Australia. The following slides are from the program and outline the main principles.

How Money and Calories Are The Same

“For both optimal health and weight loss, you must consume a diet with a high nutrient-per-calorie ratio…there are no shortcuts.” — Joel Fuhrman, Eat to Live

It occurred to me during this period that weight loss was like managing money. As someone who occasionally hacks their health, I track my calories and macronutrients in the name of personal observation and knowledge.

I followed a Ketogenic diet for three years, recording my food consumption and calories. I gained a good deal of data and knowledge, which helped me to find the most effective ways to lose weight and keep it off.

This was supported by my program The Power To Navigate Life, in which I studied the role thoughts, beliefs and emotions play in regulating health.

In tracking my calories during this time, I noticed that the process was similar to my money spending habits, insofar as their respective use and expenditure.

What I’m proposing over the coming paragraphs is not a cure, potion or remedy. It is a short-term intervention to make you aware of how you consume calories, so as to develop sound habits to prevent overeating.

However, it is not just about the calories, since being on a Ketogenic diet proved that.

There were periods when I consumed as much as 3,500+ calories per day and continued to lose fat weight while regaining muscle composition. I took exact body measurements and recorded my blood lipids to highlight the changes, making sure not to leave anything to chance.

I learned the age old myth of calories in, calories out did not apply while I was in ketosis. However, few people are willing to follow a low-carb or ketogenic diet owing to its restrictions.

So, for the rest of us, being mindful of our caloric intake is a way to manage our weight.

The American science writer Gary Taubes asserts in Why We Get Fat And What To Do About It: “The one thing we absolutely have to do if we want to get leaner — if we want to get fat out of our fat tissue and burn it — is to lower our insulin and to secrete less insulin to begin with.”

Superfluous Calories To Blame

“The most beautiful thing about your body is that it has a deep knowing about what you truly need for health and happiness.” — Louise Hay, Ahlea Khadro

What I discovered was the following.

In relation to my money habits, if I didn’t track my financial spending by the end of the week I was unsure where the money was spent. I had little recollection of the items or services I paid for, since the transactions occurred days ago.

From speaking to people over the years, this was an issue many faced. However, when I tracked my spending, I could see where the money was directed and implemented a budget to curb the frivolous spending.

So far so good.

During this time, I came off the ketogenic diet and gained 3—4 kg (6—8 lbs) during the winter.

What did I do?

I applied the same process to calories that helped me track my spending. It turned out, I was snacking during the winter months on superfluous calories that led to weight gain.

Now, I realise gaining 3—4 kg is not a big deal in the scheme of things. However, it is not the weight gain, but the experience acquired from recording the calories that was valuable.

Money and food have the same relationship, where you are likely to spend money easily and consume food easily.

So, they should be recorded until you can manage both without having to consult an app or meal tracker.

So far, I have not mentioned exercise and movement since I didn’t want this article to be an instructional piece on how to lose weight.

Exercise and movement play a role in maintaining healthy weight, but not in the way we’ve been led to believe. For now, I assume you exercise or are involved in some form of regular movement.

So here’s my outline if you want to lose weight, whether big or small, the principles are the same:

Track Your Food Consumption And Calories For 30 Days

Thirty days is a reasonable period to gather enough data on how many calories you consume. As the saying goes: “If you don’t measure it, you can’t manage it.”

It’s recognising where hidden calories are consumed that’s of importance. I suggest using an app or software program to calculate your macronutrient ratios and adhere to them as much as possible.

A benefit of recording data is that is takes into account the times when you’re likely to consume more calories, such as going out to dinner or a birthday party. Avoid worrying about the overall calories consumed for that day, but focus your attention on the total calories and macronutrients for the week.

“We don’t get fat because we overeat; we overeat because we’re getting fat,” states Gary Taubes

The aim is to reduce calories over a four week period in order for weight loss to occur. Again, I suggest you use an app or online program to calculate your minimum and maximum caloric intake per day, rather than guestimate it.

If you continue this same trajectory of consuming your calculated weekly calories, you will continue to lose weight in the ensuing months. You will have also cemented a new habit that lasts beyond that time.

Reduce Your Calories Based On What You Track

This is straightforward. Reduce your calories per day depending on your weight loss goal. As a warning, I suggest starting slowly rather than trying to lose weight quickly.

It is my personal experience coaching individuals over a ten year period that what you lose quickly is likely to come back. As the saying goes: The best time to start a new habit is yesterday.”

Continue The Habit In The Following Months

As outlined in point number one, follow your habit once the 30 day period has lapsed. You will have gathered enough data on what foods you consumed over the past 30 days. If you’re unsure of a food, track it and see what effect it has on your caloric intake.

If you experience setbacks related to illness, injury or personal circumstances, record your calories for two days and use that to get back on track.

If You Put Weight Back On, Track Your Caloric Intake Again

After coming off the ketogenic diet, I consumed more carbohydrates which I previously omitted from my diet. Naturally, during winter I was drawn to these foods once more, and gained weight.

Instead of being disheartened, I tracked my calories for a few days or sometimes an entire week to help resume my weight loss until I had reached my goal.

“To effectively lose weight and keep it off, you need to strategically alter your body weight set point” explains Gerard E. Mullin in The Gut Balance Revolution: Boost Your Metabolism, Restore Your Inner Ecology, and Lose the Weight for Good!

Remember, this is not a long term solution. Many will find once they lose weight, they will want to stick to the formula because it is successful.

Yet, there are disadvantages to limiting calories over a longer period, including depriving yourself of essential macro and micronutrients. Not to mention the mental and emotional havoc caused by maintaining this way of life.

I was precise in my approach, using FitDay software to track my macro and micronutrient ratios and supplemented where necessary.

“You don’t get fat because your metabolism slows; your metabolism slows because you’re getting fat,” is the reminder from Gary Taubes

It is worth restating: this is not a system. It is a means of checking in to make sure you are not consuming extra calories that lead to weight gain.

Most importantly, it helps you to eat healthier because like spending money, you cannot afford to spend calories frivolously if you want to maintain a lean figure.

The real message from this piece is that your health is your greatest priority.

Weight loss is a means to an end to help you maintain a healthy figure with a higher muscle to fat ratio, whatever body type or composition you are.

The post This Is The Single Biggest Thing You Can Do If You Want To Lose Weight appeared first on Tony Fahkry.

This Is What You Could Learn Right Now That Will Be Useful For The Rest Of Your Life

Meaning Making Machines

“Thinking is easy, acting is difficult, and to put one’s thoughts into action is the most difficult thing in the world.” — Johann Wolfgang von Goethe

The one thing you could learn right now that would be useful for the rest of your life is: You are not your thoughts.

It is commonplace to accept your thoughts as real, since you experience them and reason that they must be true.

For example, if a friend doesn’t return your phone call, you may entertain negative thoughts and assume they don’t care about you.

This might lead to spiralling thoughts and toxic emotions. When the person does return your call, you will no doubt give them a piece of your mind and remind them you deserve respect.

But let’s back up for a moment and examine this scenario further.

You created a mental interpretation of a scenario you knew little about and attached meaning to it.

Even though there might be several possible reasons why your friend didn’t call, you inadvertently jumped to the wrong conclusion. You focussed on the negative aspects, instead of considering other reasons for their lack of communication.

We do it often, even though the other person might have an unblemished track-record of returning calls. We assume the worst scenario and take offence, believing we were mistreated.

So, why are we so prone to negativity in these situations?

Is it an evolutionary mechanism or is negativity wired into our DNA?

“Negative thoughts are innocent— and powerless— unless you turn them into something that must be shunned, dealt with, or fixed,” writes sports psychologist Garret Kramer in The Path of No Resistance: Why Overcoming is Simpler than You Think.

You Are Not Your Thoughts

“I find the great thing in this world is, not so much where we stand, as in what direction we are moving.” — Johann Wolfgang von Goethe

Evolutionary psychologists believe negativity is part of our genetic constitution, designed to help us discern imminent danger within the environment. It is a biological mechanism to protect us, yet it is less relevant in modern society than it did when our ancestors first roamed the savannah.

Your mind uses negativity as a form of feedback to protect you from impending danger, otherwise known as a Negativity Bias.

However, in the scenario described earlier, you were convinced your friend did not care for you and you were prepared to confront them because your feelings were hurt.

Linda Graham MFT explains in Bouncing Back: Rewiring Your Brain for Maximum Resilience and Well-Being: “Cultivating an immediate positive response to a negative thought creates the space to shift perspective, supporting more flexibility and resilience. And, every time we do it, we are conditioning our brain for more resilience.”

Negativity is not necessarily bad, I would argue. It is something we must take into account in our daily lives, but we mustn’t perceive it as detrimental.

When I say you are not your thoughts, I am implying your experience of your thoughts does not define you as an individual.

Thoughts are projections taking place in your mind to which you assign meaning.

How do we know this for certain?

We could survey a hundred people and ask them how they are likely to react in a similar scenario. Some might stretch the truth, but most will give an accurate response.

Out of one hundred people sampled, the likelihood of different responses can be summarised as:

Some will say it doesn’t bother them that their friend didn’t return their call.
Others will reply that it does bothers them.
Another group are impartial.
The last group have not given it much thought to take offence.

Our thoughts differ because we’re essentially different ourselves.

“Positive and negative thoughts and emotions are just passing across our consciousness; when we perceive that, we realize the truth. The emotions and thoughts we have are illusory, which means they do not exist in the way they appear and they are completely dependent upon our interpretations,” states meditation Master Orgyen Chowang in Our Pristine Mind: A Practical Guide to Unconditional Happiness.

Body As The Subconscious Mind

“We are what we repeatedly do; excellence, then, is not an act but a habit.” — Aristotle

Your thoughts are influenced by a variety of factors, including: your past conditioning, the role of stress in your life, your level of awareness, your general outlook on life, whether you’re a pessimist or an optimist, and your state of health.

Yes, your health.

Those who suffer from poor health due to inadequate nutrition, lack of sleep and exercise, are biologically prone to negativity.

I realise this is a big declaration.

However, without turning this into a ten thousand word article citing medical and scientific literature, the health of your microbiome impacts your psychological and emotional well-being to a large degree.

Your thoughts and emotions are affected by: the foods you eat, how much you sleep and whether you exercise. These factors affect the gut—brain axis, which regulates the immune system and your interactions with others.

Louise Hay and Ahlea Khadro write in Loving Yourself to Great Health: Thoughts & Food—The Ultimate Diet: “Every cell responds to every thought you think and every word you speak, so continuous patterns of thoughts and beliefs can produce body behaviours and patterns of eases and dis-eases.”

How do we know for certain that food affects your thoughts?

Whilst I realise this is observational evidence, consider how you feel when you suffer from: constipation, diarrhoea, food poisoning, parasites or bacterial infections, gut dysfunction, intoxication and hunger?

These factors influence your mood, which in turn affects your thoughts. So the axiom ‘You are what you eat’ rings true in this scenario.

Thoughts passing through your mind are not who you are, they are projections on your mind. They are predisposed by factors within and beyond your control.

Thoughts can be likened to a radio that receives AM and FM frequencies and transmits them via radio waves.

You are the receiver of thoughts. Thinking is the process of electrical impulses within the brain that produces thoughts.

Depending on your past conditioning, genetic constitution and epigenetics, you may be more prone to negative thoughts than you realise.

Nevertheless, this doesn’t mean you are a negative person. It simply means, your bandwidth is prone to negativity because your biological environment is conducive to it.

I should say that I am talking about a person who is constantly in a negative state, not one who occasionally thinks negatively.

It should also be said, negative thoughts are useful if we take time to examine them. There is usually an underlying mechanism as to why they prevail.

Mark Coleman clarifies further in Make Peace with Your Mind: How Mindfulness and Compassion Can Free You from Your Inner Critic: “If I continue to give negative thoughts attention, then of course they grow in importance. If I stop giving them the time of day, then they have less room to take root and grow.”

Our Negative Bias

“The real voyage of discovery consists not in seeking new lands but seeing with new eyes.” — Marcel Proust

If we want to change our bandwidth away from negativity, we must first attend to our environment. For example, engaging in self-exploration helps us understand the nature of negative thoughts.

Underlying negativity is a dysfunctional belief system adopted earlier in life that includes not being safe.

I often cite the work of the late neuroscientist Candace Pert who said: “Your body is your subconscious mind.”

Your body is an integrated organism that relies on different branches of your physiology to function.

They communicate with one another and relay information via the central nervous system and parts of your brain.

So, even eating something as simple as chocolate can influence your thoughts and send a cascade of impulses throughout your body.

Candace Pert’s work with opiate receptors, as the cellular binding site for endorphins in the brain, showed that our bodies are a giant network of communication channels.

This is empowering for several reasons, least of which it means we can influence our thoughts by being mindful of them and our environment.

The age old debate of Nature vs Nurture now suggests we should Nurture Nature.

I trust you now appreciate you are not your thoughts but the receiver of thoughts.

Your environment, the past and present has an influence on your thoughts more than you realise.

Whilst we’re wired for negativity, you should not feel helpless because of this. However, if you appreciate your predisposition towards negativity, you’re likely to manage it better through mindfulness.

It comes down to paying attention to your thoughts in a much more consistent fashion.

Know the essence of the person you call “I” and work with what you’ve got, instead of pushing to become something you are not.

Our thoughts are rarely the problem.

It is when we identify and attach meaning to them, that we invite the greatest danger to our long-term happiness.

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Why This Simple Daily Habit Will Make You Become A Better Person

“An arrogant person considers himself perfect. This is the chief harm of arrogance. It interferes with a person’s main task in life – becoming a better person.” — Leo Tolstoy

Journaling.

Yes, this simple daily habit will make you become a better person, because the simplest habits are ones that produce the greatest results.

It is the compound effect journaling offers that often goes unnoticed.

Journaling has many unexpected benefits, one of which is improved mental and emotional wellbeing.

Many people ruminate on problems that gnaw at them, sometimes for decades.

Brain scientist Jill Bolte Taylor suggests that the average lifespan of an emotion to move through the nervous system is one and a half minutes. This releases the burden of clinging to our emotional attachments longer than required.

This daily habit helps you to make peace with toxic emotions and transform them into healthy ones. Otherwise, they remain ‘stuck’ in your nervous system instead of moving through you.

The simple act of writing in your journal on a daily basis helps you to be mindful of the present moment, instead of being caught up in the past or future.

“All clutter and stress seem to be found on the surface, on the level of thinking and emotions,” affirms Peter Francis Dziuban in: Simply Notice: Clear Awareness Is the Key To Happiness, Love and Freedom.

Mindfulness is a way to attain clarity as to what really matters. You become attuned to your emotions instead of allowing them to control you.

I recall listening to the spiritual teacher Eckhart Tolle state that anytime you are emotionally agitated for no reason, you are recollecting unresolved memories and creating a Pain body experience.

Similarly, Colette Baron Reid writes in Uncharted: The Journey Through Uncertainty to Infinite Possibility: “Memories are emotions intertwined with thoughts, and those can become lodged not just in your brain but in your body too.”

Journaling is the act of making sense of those memories by transferring them onto paper, otherwise they lead to conditions such as T.M.S. (Tension Myositis Syndrome), according to Dr. John Sarno.

Repressed emotions resulting from psychological stress are stored in the body and may inhibit muscle and/or organ function if left untreated.

“Become a millionaire not for the million dollars, but for what it will make of you to achieve it.” — Jim Rohn

Writing your thoughts on paper is a form of emotional freedom. There are moments in our lives where we must bite our tongue with family, friends and co-workers for obvious reasons.

We cannot express our feelings, so we stow them away hoping they don’t resurface down the road. This is the psychological pain point many people experience later in life.

The key is to allow your emotions to move through you using a method Dr. Daniel Siegel outlines in his book Mindsight. He suggests you name and tame the emotions you experience rather than be overwhelmed by them.

Journaling helps identify the troubling emotions by writing them as “I feel angry” instead of “I am angry.” The latter is a limited self-definition since, “I feel angry” implies the ability to acknowledge a feeling, without being overwhelmed by it.

“Just by bringing greater attention to the part of your body where strong emotions or physical pain linger, you are loosening each layer of cellular memory to assist in another moment of healing,” affirms Matt Kahn.

I suggest exploring your thoughts on paper as the last thing at night after a complete day. In Zen teaching, meditation is thought to help wipe away the day’s stressors by witnessing our thoughts through the eyes of equanimity.

Journaling purges you of mental stressors. It is the process of becoming intimate with your thoughts instead of allowing them to occupy space in your mind.

You become attentive to your mental landscape instead of letting runaway thoughts impose on your freedom.

This simple daily habit will make you become a better person, because you are aware of your thoughts and won’t be overcome by them.

Committing your thoughts to paper invites you to calmly witness them with a clear awareness rather than an agitated mind.

Tibetan meditation master Orgyen Chowang explains in Our Pristine Mind: A Practical Guide to Unconditional Happiness: “You must first relax the mind and then observe it with patience and perseverance. It is that simple.”

Journaling is the act of coming home to yourself and loving the person whose thoughts appear on the page.

What we see and perceive in our waking life results from the mind adding judgement and commentary, like morning fog.

Writing your thoughts downloads them onto paper and liberates you of the need to process them any more than you need to.

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This Is Why The Fears You Refuse To Face Become Your Limits

“You only know yourself when you go beyond your limits.” — Paulo Coelho

Fear maintains its presence in your life through the energy given to it.

It is the accumulation of pain and betrayal that characterises fear.

It’s typical for many to hide from their fears, though sooner or later they grow big enough and overpower you.

“The purpose of fear is to keep us alive, and to protect us from dangerous situations. If you’re sitting in Starbucks and a hungry tiger saunters through the front door, fear can be a powerful evolutionary gift that saves your life,” writes Jamie Smart in Clarity: Clear Mind, Better Performance, Bigger Results.

Have you noticed that avoiding fear gives it more energy to keep it alive? Distancing yourself from fear does not loosen its grip on you, it only constricts it.

What is the antidote for overcoming fear?

Moving towards your fears is the way to make peace with them, so they don’t conquer you.

Fear stifles personal growth and limits your potential because of the narrative it preaches.

It is nothing more than an illusion conjured up by the mind to keep you safe.

If you consider the storyline fear promotes, it is one of security and survival. That’s all well and good, until it limits your success and happiness.

Has fear stopped you taking action in aspects of your life?

Do you play it safe in terms of relationships for fear of being hurt again?

Whilst it’s understandable, underlying this conflict is the need to be in a loving relationship. This desire means you either subscribe to fear or trust your heart to lead the way.

Your source of joy and happiness can only be found in the unknown.

Brendon Burchard explains in The Motivation Manifesto: “Fear rules us only if we let it. In almost all cases, it is something that we can choose to activate or not activate. We can choose to run or not, even if our impulse is blaring at its highest decibel to run.”

“You can only hide from yourself in the noise, but not in the quiet. If you truly want to get to know yourself, then get rid of the distractions. If you want to really understand what has been holding you back, then simply and calmly focus your full attention within, and observe.” — Bryant McGill

Do you stay within your comfort zone with respect to your career?

Do you feel unworthy of success or a better career?

Be honest and face up to your pain, otherwise it’s likely to become your disappointment later on.

You have so much potential that yearns to be developed. First, you must confront your fears and see them as nothing more than a facade that keeps you confined, most of the time.

Have you noticed those who insist on staying safe?

They never grow or venture outside their comfort zone. These same people complain life is unfair, and that success is hard to attain.

They believe life conspires against them and refuse to take risks. They avoid awakening their greatest potential, because fear convinces them it is not worth the effort.

Their fears are their adversaries, not their safeguard.

“It is helpful to remember that fear closes you down, keeping you caught in the game of resisting Life, which builds a wall between you and Life. This wall of resistance stops Life from flowing through you, cutting you off from the joy of being fully alive,” states Mary O’Malley in: What’s in the Way Is the Way: A Practical Guide for Waking Up to Life.

I want you to make an agreement with yourself once you’ve finished this article.

Declare you are worthy and capable of achieving what you set your mind to. However, you must move past your fears first and transform them into courage and faith.

You must reconcile your fears, otherwise they will torment you until you silence them.

By facing your fears, you weaken their grip and see them as signposts leading towards a life of meaning and purpose.

There’s a quote in the Bible from the Gospel of Thomas that reads: “If you bring forth what is within you, what is within you will save you. If you do not bring forth what is within you, what is within you will destroy you.”

It is with that I invite you to face your fears, rather than allow them to become your limits.

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The Power Of Precious Moments: How To Cherish The Gift Of Now

Escape the Here and Now

“There’s only one reason why you’re not experiencing bliss at this present moment, and it’s because you’re thinking or focusing on what you don’t have…. But, right now you have everything you need to be in bliss.” — Anthony de Mello

“How shall I attain Eternal Life?”

“Eternal Life is now. Come into the present.”

“But I am in the present now, am I not?”

“No.”

“Why not?”

“Because you haven’t dropped your past.”

“Why should I drop my past? Not all of it is bad.”

“The past is to be dropped not because it is bad but because it is dead.”

Precious moments are the fertile seeds, life embeds into your now experience.

Anthony de Mello’s opening fable reminds us of the futility of clutching onto the past, since our needs are met when we are grounded in the present moment.

It is difficult to stay present when bombarded with the avalanche of outside noises vying for our attention.

Mobile phone devices and other electronic gadgets prevent us from opening to the present moment because our attention span is limited.

The need to escape from the here and now through multitasking, for example, is based on the assumption that we will be more productive.

It is the lure of the future being better than the present that most excites us. So, we transition from one moment to another, hoping the next will be better but rarely is it that way.

“People who think there’s somewhere to get to and that “there” is better than “here” don’t tend to spend much time enjoying the present moment,” writes Jamie Smart in Clarity: Clear Mind, Better Performance, Bigger Results.

Craving the Next Thing

“Always hold fast to the present. Every situation, indeed every moment, is of infinite value, for it is the representative of a whole eternity.” — Johann Wolfgang von Goethe

The future has its own problems and challenges, but we are eager for the next moment to arrive because we are constantly discontent.

Can you see the foolishness of our thoughts when we believe our happiness lies in the future and not in the present moment?

In that respect, we are like mice in a lab experiment looking for the exit out of the maze, only to be met with a dead end.

It is a relentless journey of anxiety, frustration and longing.

We become spectators of our life instead of being the main character. We flee from the present moment just like an actor transitioning from scene to scene in a play.

Author Dennis Merritt Jones explains in Your Redefining Moments: Becoming Who You Were Born to Be: “The irony is, our body can’t be any place other than in the present moment, but far too often, our mind is elsewhere. Mindfulness is the practice of calling the thinking mind back to where the body is, wherein the two become as one in the present moment.”

Happiness is not dependent on attaining something outside of you because once you do, you are likely to crave the next thing.

After a while, you become accustomed to yearning and not appreciating what is taking place now.

I invite you to connect with the power of precious moments to cherish the gift of your now experience.

The Power of Precious Moments

“Life is all memory, except for the one present moment that goes by you so quickly you hardly catch it going.” — Tennessee Williams

I was speaking with a client recently who was bemoaning her current problems. They were resolvable by any means, but from her perspective they were out of reach.

I invited her to consider the issue from the viewpoint of a person dying from a life-threatening illness, someone who would give anything to be in her shoes.

While an extreme example, it helped my client to see the folly of her thoughts and the insignificance of her dilemma.

Jan Frazier writes in The Freedom of Being: At Ease with What Is: “When you notice yourself ‘lost in your head,’ bring your attention to what’s in the immediate scene. Whatever activity or condition is apparent; what your senses perceive; what you’re doing; what you feel like physically. Bring the primary focus to the reality of the present moment, even as you’re aware of the larger context.”

The point is, when we are caught up in our pain and suffering we want to run towards pleasure – hoping it will end the suffering.

However, these are momentary glimpses into happiness since we are not confronting our problems but fleeing from them.

To appreciate the precious moments of your life, accept each one as perfectly orchestrated for your highest good, even if it doesn’t look that way.

This means being in a state of reverence for co-creating each experience as it should be.

Lean in to your problems and openly accept them, knowing they contain the seed of something extraordinary for your life to unfold.

If you continue to run away from the present moment, it will gather momentum and come crashing upon you when you least expect it.

This moment, this wonderful precious moment is a gift. There is nothing for you to do other than to be alive and appreciate the wakefulness of it.

The American Zen teacher Ezra Bayda avows in The Authentic Life: Zen Wisdom for Living Free from Complacency and Fear: “Surrendering to the physical reality of the present moment, we learn to go deeper with each in-breath, entering the silence, the equanimity, of reality-as-it-is.”

The present moment is to be treasured because it is there where you experience your authentic self.

It is not the Returns and Exchanges division at your local department store, but a treasured gift that flows through your life unimpeded.

To analyse the past with regret or look to the future denies you the gift of your now experience.

Aware and Awake

“The present moment, if you think about it, is the only time there is. No matter what time it is, it is always now.” — Marianne Williamson

“Life can be found only in the present moment. The past is gone, the future is not yet here, and if we do not go back to ourselves in the present moment, we cannot be in touch with life,” writes the Vietnamese Buddhist monk Thich Nhat Hanh.

A great deal is written nowadays about the power of gratitude – and for good reason. It is an important lesson that teaches us to stop and be present, instead of being caught up in our minds.

We become aware of and awake to our present moment surroundings and appreciate what unfolds. To expect the story conjured in our minds will somehow come to life as we imagine, only fuels our suffering.

Moreover, this imagined plot seldom transpires as we hope.

A practice I take part in when I sense being disengaged from the present moment, involves walking around my home touching various objects while noting their texture.

Some surfaces feel cold, hard, and soft yet they evoke distinctive sensations within my body. This simple practice anchors my awareness to the present moment instead of being caught up in my mind’s dialogue.

By being aware of these moments, life offers clues to what is in harmony with my greatest self. I need not run away from the present, but pause and offer gratitude for the opportunity to experience what is taking place.

Jan Frazier says: “Life takes place in the present. The looking happens there, in presence; and ultimately, the course of action will be decided there, in some present moment.”

Make it a priority to disconnect from what you’re doing throughout the day, even if it means stepping away from the office or your work schedule. Notice as many things as you can while outdoors and appreciate what you see.

Avoid checking your mobile device for status updates or news events which keep you hypervigilant as to what is wrong in the world. This is not your reality but the reality you are dragged into.

If you seek happiness, it will only be found in the present moment, not in a mobile app.

Be mindful of what’s taking place in your immediate environment for that is the true source of happiness.

“When we’re aware of being in the Now, present moments come and go, like ripples and waves in the ocean of awake awareness,” explains Loch Kelly in Shift into Freedom: The Science and Practice of Open-Hearted Awareness.

For the Master knew we must let go of our attachments to the past not because it is bad but because it is dead.

This vital clue alone points to the significance of each moment being a precious gift that can slip through our fingers if we’re not attentive.

After all, the past and future cannot coexist anymore than our thoughts about it create its reality.

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What You Should Know About The Power Of Gratitude For A Better Life

“Gratitude is the healthiest of all human emotions. The more you express gratitude for what you have, the more likely you will have even more to express gratitude for.” — Zig Ziglar

The 19th-century American minister Henry Ward Beecher said “Gratitude is the fairest blossom which springs from the soul.”

He knew something that many lose sight of nowadays and that is: gratitude is the language of the soul.

Tune in to any social media channel and you are confronted with status updates of what is wrong with the world and humanity.

We are so accustomed to negativity that we fail to notice it when confronted with bad news.

We think, “Oh that’s right” and go on with our daily lives without processing the impact of the events.

However, one human quality stands above negativity and has the power to improve our lives.

Gratitude is the unsung hero that is seldom mentioned in conversations, just like compassion or kindness because they are considered weaker human qualities.

Dr. Alex Lickerman writes in The Undefeated Mind: On the Science of Constructing an Indestructible Self: “Gratitude not only brings joy but also improves our sense of satisfaction with life to an even greater extent than either pleasure, meaning, or engagement.”

He says: “In fact, the strength of gratitude’s ability to make us feel good about life is second only to that of love.”

Dr. David Hawkins was an internationally renowned psychiatrist, lecturer and expert in human consciousness who wrote a compelling book entitled Power vs. Force. In it, he explains how our level of consciousness affects humanity.

In his map of consciousness he explains how the overall average level of human consciousness stands at 207, just above the base level of 200. It is only in recent centuries that mankind has shifted consciousness from the level of Force to Power.

What is more, just 15% of the world’s population is above the critical level of 200. That 15% has the weight to counterbalance the negativity of the remaining 85% of the world’s people.

Were it not for these counterbalances, mankind would self-destruct out of the sheer mass of negativity.

“Reflect upon your present blessings, of which every man has plenty; not on your past misfortunes, of which all men have some.” — Charles Dickens

I find these numbers staggering.

From the map of consciousness it’s clear that gratitude is aligned with LOVE. This makes gratitude the doorway to a higher consciousness that includes joy, happiness and inner freedom.

Gratitude awakens the soul essence of the individual to overcome limitations and obstacles.

Not only is it the window to the soul, but the gateway to liberation and bliss.

Gratitude bears the signature of the soul, while greed, hate and negativity are the underpinnings of the ego.

Feed the ego and you will give life to lower emotional states.

“Gratitude is like fertilizer for new insights. When you’re feeling grateful for what you’ve already seen, you create fertile soil for new insights to blossom,” writes Jamie Smart in Clarity: Clear Mind, Better Performance, Bigger Results.

However, it is not enough to read this and trust in my words. I urge you to experience the change in emotional states and note how you feel.

How do the emotions of anger, negativity, or hate feel in your body?

In contrast, how about: happiness, joy, inspiration, passion, and enthusiasm?

It was the late neuroscientist Candace Pert who said: “The body is the subconscious mind.”

Put simply, your body conveys the significance of your thoughts. Whilst you cannot escape your emotional response, you can change your thinking to influence your emotions.

Given that gratitude emerges from the soul, make it a habit to connect with this emotional state on a regular basis.

After all, it may be the very thing that contributes to a better life.

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Why The Power Of One Thought Can Change Everything

“The soul becomes dyed with the colour of its thoughts.” — Marcus Aurelius

It is said you will truly experience life when you stop living in your thoughts and words.

What do I mean by this?

Look at your hand. What do you see?

Undeniably, it is a hand but even that description is vague. Is it a small or a large hand? A gentle or rough hand? A hand with long or short fingers? How do the palmar flexion creases appear?

There are many attributes to a hand and our experience of it is reflected in our thoughts.

Most people who read this article will observe their hands differently to others.

Some might like the way their hands look, others are told their hands are chubby, skinny or otherwise. You get the point.

The world we see out there reflects the world we inhabit within.

Author Michael Neill writes in The Space Within: Finding Your Way Back Home: “We live in a world of thought, but we think we live in a world of external experience.”

He goes on to say: “The mind is not a camera, it’s a projector. We can’t tell the difference between an imagined experience ‘in here’ and what’s going on ‘out there’— and that confusion creates a lot of confusion.”

Moreover, the person you call “I” is the sum of your past conditioning.

For this reason, I oppose the notion of free will because we are conditioned to be who are, not who we want to be.

Granted, you might say despite our childhood conditioning a person can rewrite their past and create a new future.

“Our life always expresses the result of our dominant thoughts.” — Soren Kierkegaard

While that may be, you are nevertheless dealing with decades of conditioning sewn into your psyche. Furthermore, there are no assurances the person you become is reflected in the choices you make.

“Before something can clearly be seen or perceived for what it is, thinking is already adding judgments and commentary, acting like a smoke screen,” explains Peter Francis Dziuban in Simply Notice: Clear Awareness Is the Key To Happiness, Love and Freedom.

While I may have painted a grim picture of the future, great possibilities exist within the recesses of your mind.

For example, there are documented cases of people who experience sudden awakenings or altered states of consciousness brought on without outside interference.

The power of one thought can change everything because that thought alone can ignite other thoughts, and set alight a cascade of similar thoughts with life-changing effects.

One thought alone is like a seed dropped into the ground that germinates the mind and awakens your true potential.

Albert Einstein experienced these moments when he conducted thought experiments, his most notable being: Chasing After A Beam Of Light.

How does all this relate to you?

Your thoughts are incredibly powerful in a multitude of ways. The power of the subconscious mind is potent to the degree that it can bring about spontaneous healings and effortlessly figure out complex problems.

Therefore, be mindful of the music you listen to. The words you hear interspersed within the songs can be hypnotising (unintentionally) and unbeknownst to your conscious mind.

The television programs you watch and the people you surround yourself with have the same impact. You are the result of your external environment.

One thought can change everything because it can set your world ablaze with excitement and wonder.

But you must be ready for the thought when it emerges, since it will transform your life unlike anything you’ve ever known.

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Why Being Comfortable With Uncertainty Is The Key To Success

“When you become comfortable with uncertainty, Infinite Possibilities open up in your life.” — Eckhart Tolle

“If you want to know your past, look into your present conditions. If you want to know your future, look into your present actions,” states the Chinese proverb.

Life is filled with uncertainty.

You rarely have a precise picture of what lies ahead, so you take what arises with determined courage.

It’s natural to believe you are in control of your life, yet uncertainty is required because the seeds of opportunity lie in the unexpected.

At a deeper level, you fear uncertainty because you may lack the life skills to navigate through it. Known as a negativity bias, it is a mental predisposition to notice and ruminate on negative information while neglecting the positive.

The security you crave is an illusion that draws you into a false sense of safety.

Author David Rock writes in Your Brain at Work: “The brain craves certainty. A sense of uncertainty about the future and feeling out of control both generate strong limbic system responses.”

As a result, your mind looks to your external environment to reinforce a sense of balance.

Bruce Hood affirms in The Self Illusion: “…in situations where outcomes are important, we get stressed by uncertainty and feel the need to do something so that we can have the illusion that we can control events.”

To believe you are in command of your life can be both a blessing and curse.

In one way it affirms your sense of safety, while on the other it is misleading because you have limited control, if any.

It’s no surprise as the mind is notorious for exaggerating situations more than they appear. Known in psychology as catastrophizing, it refers to the inherent bias to perceive events within a negative context.

So, how can you embrace the unexpected without being overcome by the accompanying emotions?

“Faith means living with uncertainty – feeling your way through life, letting your heart guide you like a lantern in the dark.” — Dan Millman

To embrace uncertainty requires a change in perspective. You must yield to the intrinsic forces of life, not oppose them. However uncomfortable, you lean in to your fears and insecurities but do not run away from them.

Therefore, inhabit your body when anxiety arises and then choose a time to examine the cause of the anxiety.

Have you experienced similar anxiety in the past?

If so, are you repeating these feelings instead of dealing with them?

Fear is a confronting emotion, yet we gain the self-assurance when we embrace it as a useful emotion.

You can turn down the volume on fear by being exposed to it a little each time.

Uncertainty is an inner knowing that everything will turn out exactly as it should. It strengthens your commitment to abide with the natural order of life.

You must be comfortable with uncertainty because it exists in our lives. Don’t retreat from it but expose yourself to it a little each time.

It was the Roman Emperor Marcus Aurelius who once declared: “If you are distressed by anything external, the pain is not due to the thing itself but to your own estimate of it; and this you have the power to revoke at any moment.”

Try finding the balance between uncertainty and maintaining control without manipulating outcomes. Let go of any tension, anxiety and fear by embracing the unknown.

Uncertainty helps you to re-evaluate the past and make new choices in light of what transpires. It presents opportunities to create a compelling future based on new information.

Often, the most ambitious plans emerge through the obscuring veil of uncertainty.

Welcome curiosity and excitement and you will slowly become comfortable with it.

Also, be aware of your present actions as you embrace uncertainty.

In doing so, you move toward the unfamiliar with a firm ambition to resolve the past.

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