Gregg Michaelsen's Blog, page 19

There’s a New Mouse in The House! Online Dating For Women Just Got Better

There’s a New Mouse in The House!

Online dating for women just got better! Hi Ladies, Gregg here, and I have a big announcement to make. Love is in the Mouse 2017: Find the Love of Your Life With The Click of The Mouse!  is going live on December 4th. Get your copy for just .99 cents!

This online dating eBook is all new and concentrates on writing profiles.  In the beginning I give my version of the ultimate profile! Then I teach what to ask a guy and how to move things offline.

Once again, Kirbie and I have created a free workbook to go with the book so you can work along with me, and we have created an eye opening online profile guide called “The Good, The Bad, and The Ugly.” Here, you and I look at (and laugh) what not to write on your profile. Both free with the book.

I took some time and signed in as a woman (I do have nice legs haha!) to view a few sites and WHOA, I could not believe what some women are writing! Men too.

My previous Mouse book is still worthy of reading as it lays the groundwork to get you online dating successfully, so keep it as a reference.

I also found a great review website that analyzes and ranks the different online dating sites. My friend Lexi contacted me over at Reviews.com.  New research suggests more than one third of marriages begin with online dating. Finding a potential partner has become much easier, but choosing the best online dating service hasn’t.

Interacting on an ineffective dating site can start to feel like a full-time job that doesn’t ever payout. Because of this, Lexi’s team spent six weeks reviewing 68 online dating sites to find which algorithms actually work and which site was most likely to find you a compatible match. They found your top picks by analyzing web-traffic data, consulting with matchmakers and online dating experts, along with evaluating their user bases, functionality and quality. Even further, they personally tested them to find which ones resulted in the most meaningful interactions and which ones had an excessive amount of obnoxious messages.

Hook-up sites were intentionally left out.

With all of their research, they created a comprehensive guide to help daters find the best dating site for their specific needs (best overall, best for long-term relationships, best app and best niche dating sites). They also offer tips on how to maximize your online dating experience, by making it worthwhile and safer.

The information is free and the tips are very helpful! The link is here. Oh, they also review everything else under the sun too – not just dating sites.

So grab my new book, Love is in The Mouse 2017, for peanuts and then get over to Reviews.com and pick the best site for you!

Copping a new attitude

Mirror Mirror on the Wall | Affirmations for Success

Hi Ladies, Gregg here and today I need to talk to you about Affirmations for success!

Affirmations used to have a bad rap. I remember an old Saturday Night Live skit with Al Franken where he looked in the mirror and stated; “I’m good enough, I’m smart enough, and doggone it, people like me.” Then, years later, the science behind them started to seep through. Today, they are the most powerful tool I use to succeed in all my goals.

Affirmations can make you feel silly at first but do NOT underestimate the power of them. I do them myself and have helped hundreds of women, some with serious issues, change their lives JUST by using affirmations. Whether we realize it or not, many people say bad things about themselves hundred’s of times per day, and unless they have counter-training, the negativity slowly poisons them.

Remember, you didn’t say these bad things when you were a little kid did you? No. Society, our parents, our failed relationships etc. etc, slowly told our brains we are bad people and it’s our fault. What happened?

We believed it.

Now we are going to replace this bad stuff with good stuff and guess what? If you tell yourself good stuff all day long, every day, for about 33-66 days – you brain will start to believe it just like it believed the bad stuff and BAM, negative Nelly will be dead and you will jumping for joy.

You see, the brain has no choice but to manifest, to believe, what you tell it to believe…this ain’t hocus pocus – THIS WORKS!!!

The mirror is where it all happens for most people, especially women. The mirror is the conduit for the negativity. Every time you see yourself in the reflection the negativity starts. That’s why written, positive, notes on your mirror are critical! “I can love”, “I can commit.” Whatever suits you, say it.

You won’t believe it at first but that is OK – SAY IT!!

Then move away from the mirror, for 10 minutes, 15 minutes and try to keep saying the positive thought (affirmation). You will find you will return to your old bad thoughts – that’s normal and OK. Go farther and farther from the mirror until you can stay positive for 1/2 of a day and then 1 full day.

I named my evil voices – Burt (the parrot) and Ernie (the lizard who eats parrots)! Burt was my bad voice who sat on my left shoulder spewing crap and stomping out my dreams. Suddenly, and purposely, ERNIE appeared as my positive voice to save the day on my right shoulder. They did battle! It was silly, stupid, and funny! I found I was talking to myself out loud all day but who cares – I did it anyway.

Then, after 3 weeks, it all stopped because Burt could not take it anymore and he croaked! And WOW, how free I was that day – I will never forget it.

So if you want to learn more and see how Affirmations will work for you, please read my book Comfortable In Your Own Shoes.

I even made a free info-graphic to help my wonderful readers like you;

https://www.whoholdsthecardsnow.com/wp-content/uploads/Own-Your-Tomorrow-Greggs-20-Confidence-Building-Tips-2016.pdf?utm_source=rss&utm_medium=rss

Stay crazy,

Gregg

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Men Love in Different Ways!

How Men Love

Ladies, this is a very important chapter. I am not going to sugar coat this one. You wouldn’t want it any other way!

We (men) say, “I love you” OUR way! Our way consists of these ACTIONS:

Men love in different ways – Solving your problems

I know this sounds very unromantic, but it’s true. We give you a back rub when your back aches. We stay up with you when you can’t sleep. If we love you, we start paying for things because we are providers. It doesn’t matter if you don’t need us to pay. We will fix your car or get your car to a mechanic that will. Household issues? We’re on it!

Cutting the lawn, building a shed or changing out the kitchen cabinets let us show you our love through actions. When you say, “The lawn looks great, honey, can you do the backyard too?” We want to cum our pants! Then, we want to do MORE things for you. Backyard? Done.

“Gregg, it can’t be that simple.” YES IT CAN! AND IT IS! We are that simple. Men love in different ways than women do.  Keep a tasty treat above our jowls and we will do the trick over and over. Or do it YOUR way: “I thought you said you were going to cut the back yard too. You never finish anything you start.” Ugh. We go limp, fetal and head to the couch with a beer. Backyard? Screw that.

Your choice. But only one of the ways above hits our love language button. You see – this is how we feel and show love. We do silly “manly” things for women. Granted, cutting the lawn is not as romantic as flowers, but believe me it will lead to flowers if you compliment us on our duties.

Are you getting this?  So the next time a guy or your guy fixes something for you or does a favor, he might be saying, “I love you.” As silly as this may sound to you, you need to realize this. If you don’t, contempt will build on both sides and chip away at the relationship bit by bit.

And often times, a man will say, “I love you,” because you are making him.  He figures it is easier  just to say it when he doesn’t necessarily mean it. Ultimately, the words will flow out of his mouth but they need to come out naturally.

Protecting you

I always tell women to look for chivalry. This trait is POWERFUL. If a man opens doors, walks next to you against the traffic and helps you sit down at a restaurant… he LOVES you! He will defend you at all costs too. In a dark alley walking to the car, we are in protection mode for you. It’s built in to our DNA. Again, it’s not as romantic as saying, “I love you”, but it is OUR way.

Socially announcing you

This is huge. If we post FB photos of you— then you have us hooked. When we are HAPPY to meet your Mom, friends and ATTEND your hobbies, we are hooked. When we WANT you to meet OUR Mom, friends and attend our hobbies, again, we are SHOWING you that we are in LOVE! When we put our friends on the back burner? WOW, we are in love. Look for this. When a man socially announces you to the important people in his life, he is showing you that he truly loves you. Look for it. And if you don’t see this in your man, then move on.

Taking on Responsibility

Another big one. When a man helps you with boring stuff, he is probably starting to fall in love with you. Let’s face it; moving  your furniture to a new apartment is no fun for any man. Bringing you soup when your breath stinks and your make-up is all over the place because you are sick with the flu means we love you. Or staying home from work to help you with a project.  All of these are positive signs of a guy showing you his love. Buying a car and the salesman is treating you like shit? Watch as we take control, waste that salesman and get you that car cheap. Mmmmm— watch as Tarzan take on salesman!

Sex

Big subject, ladies. Back when we were growing up, one of our most coveted “rites of passage” was to have sex with as many women as  possible. Maybe this is the caveman reproduction thing, who knows. But somewhere, we got judged, and our status stamped by our male peers based on how many women we could have sex with.

I am not proud of this male fact. And I’m sure, right now, you aren’t proud of me. But it is true. In fact, of all our achievements, I think sex ruled us the most in our late adolescent/ early adult years. We would lie all the time to our friends and tell them we slept with girls even if we didn’t. We would pray that they would not find out. I now know that they were all lying back to me as well.

My point is that being proficient at sex has stuck to all men. We need to believe that we are good at it. So this affects you directly. You need to be gentle with our feelings. More gentle than you think. Say, “I love that, now slow down with your tongue.” Don’t say, “Ow! That hurts, haven’t you ever done this before?”

Ouch. Remember, men THINK they are great in the sack. In reality, most of us suck. Shit, I didn’t know the difference between an asshole and a clit until I was 22. But DON’T tell us we suck! Teach us slowly and with great sensitivity to our little boy feelings, and watch how good we can become. When we get good at sex, then we want to satisfy you more. And let’s face it – all women are very different when it comes to pleasure and orgasms.

So many women get angry at their guy for not “trying harder” when we have no friggin idea what you want because we are afraid to ask. This deflates our manhood and our dicks! So understand this point and talk about it with your guy and things will stay HOT in the bedroom. It’s just another one of our differences in showing love. Now, obviously, there are exceptions. Some guys rock in the bedroom. But don’t assume this.

When we want sex all the time, we are hooked. Look for this and keep an eye on it. One of the first things I ask a woman (to her shock and horror) is how often does she have sex with this guy. When I hear barely once a week, there is a problem. Men need sex often but we don’t always want a long drawn out session. Understand this. If you come with an owner’s manual on “how to get you off” and it involves 3 chimpanzees and an albino midget riding a bike— we are going elsewhere.

This could be to porn or another woman but understand this is HOW we are. That said, we WANT and NEED to please you. Communicate with us in a positive way and we will be more than happy to reciprocate. We know we can’t “just get off” all the time without pleasing you. But allow us before work, maybe, to get rough and selfish without the  dreaded speech of your sexual needs not being met in every session.

This is HUGE. Let’s face it, we can stare at a glass of milk and get off. You, on the other hand, need much more emotion and foreplay. So the reality is we are going to get off much more than you. It’s ok! Let us and don’t fall into the justice trap of “you orgasmed, so I need to.” We will reciprocate. Show us how, but dumb it down and be gentle with our feelings.

If this stuff makes you stop and think then you need to continue reading! Check out my #1 Amazon Best Seller “To Date A Man, You Must Understand A Man”.

Cheers,

Gregg

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Tips To Keep Him Hooked

True, there are plenty of fish in the sea, but for the longest time you seem to only snag losers. Maybe one or two seemed promising, but you just couldn’t keep them on the line so you lost them. Or maybe they just weren’t worth keeping, so you throw them back and wait for the next one to come along and bite. Then finally it happens. You score the catch of a lifetime. The one you have been waiting for. You feel that rush of excitement as you reel him in. But now what? How do you keep him hooked for the long haul?

If you have read any of my best selling books, you should be a confident woman who knows what she wants in life and in love. You have your own hobbies, career goals, a great circle of friends, and an understanding of the male psyche. And let’s face it; understanding men is half the battle! You are ready for lasting love, and you have finally found the person you want to spend the rest of your life with — a man of value. THE ONE. He appreciates you for the amazing person you are, he loves being with you, and he doesn’t want to lose you. You love and respect one another. You have a strong foundation built on trust and intimacy. Your relationship is great — but your challenge is to KEEP it that way! Even when all the important elements are there, (love, trust, respect, intimacy, appreciation, and so on) relationships take work. In time, that honeymoon period fades. You’ve seen it happen before. But this time things will be different. This time it’s forever.

How to keep your guy hooked on YOU!

First things first. Have you read Pennies in the Jar: How to Keep a Man for Life? It’s like a relationship toolbox — an insurance policy against affairs and harm from devastating life events. If you really want to keep him hooked I would suggest you pick up a copy. It really is possible to build an impenetrable wall around your relationship by learning how to rack up tons of great memories — pennies in the jar! Once you know how to accomplish this, you will know how to keep a man for life!

Some Tips To Keep A Man For Life

A couple that plays together stays together! Yes, it’s important to have your own interests, but also sharing a mutual hobby (or hobbies) is a great way to have fun together and create good memories.
Go out on date nights! Sure, staying home in your PJs and cuddling on the couch with a movie is always nice. But you also need to get out there and experience all the exciting things life has to offer you as a couple. Make time for dates and let him show you off al little!
Manage your emotions. This one is a biggie, and he will love you all the more for it. That doesn’t mean stuff it all down inside. It means being mindful of overreacting.
Know how to fight fair. Another biggie. EVERY couple fights now and then. It doesn’t mean the relationship is doomed. But you have to fight fair. Cheap shots, grudges and a fiery temper can destroy what you have, and how you fight can seriously make or break a relationship.
Learn to have balance and great communication. Men don’t always wear their hearts on their sleeves like we tend to do. So it’s important to keep the lines of communication comfortable and open.
Remember to laugh together. Because laughter really is the best medicine!

To learn more you’ll have to read my book. And since you have a great guy who wants to be with you, chances are he will be willing to be an active participant in keeping your relationship strong. Maybe he will even read it himself! Seriously, if a guy can pick up 50 Shades of Gray out of sheer curiosity or possibly even jealousy (what is it about this dude named Gray, and why on earth is my girlfriend reading this?), he can read Pennies in the Jar: How to Keep a Man for Life (my girlfriend is so awesome, she wants ME!)

Here for you,

Gregg

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The Top 9 Reasons to Try Online Dating

Are you having trouble finding a good match? Do you want multiple men lined up at your door, just to have a chance to meet you? Would you like to pick out the perfect guy for you from a gigantic pool of men? Then maybe it’s time to try online dating! Anna here. And no, I haven’t lost my mind. If the thought of online dating makes you shudder, think again. According to statisticbrain.com, 49,250,000 single people in the US have dipped their toes in the online dating pool this year. That’s a big pool. And more than half of them are men! According to Gregg Michaelsen, Boston’s top dating coach and best selling author, it’s “the way of the world.” So keep an open mind, and keep reading to learn more.

Love is in The Mouse

Maybe you have tried online dating before, or maybe you never even considered it. Regardless of your single situation, they key to successful online dating is knowing the RIGHT WAY to do it. In the book, Love is in The Mouse, Gregg Michaelsen covers everything you need to know — your profile, pics, screening out the losers, being safe, and actually going on a date with someone you met online. It’s like having the ultimate Wingman!

The 9 Advantages of Online Dating

Chances are you know at least one person married to or in a committed relationship with someone they met online. Honestly, I can name quite a few! But if that’s not enough, and you still need convincing, here are the top nine reasons to try online dating.

On many sites, men outnumber women by four to one. That’s why many sites are FREE to women.


Online dating gives you options and the power to date multiple men. You can easily fill your bucket with as many fish as you want. If he is wrong for you, toss him back in the pool. If he’s a great catch — keep him!


With online dating you can experiment and meet different types of men than whom you normally gravitate towards. You may surprise yourself, and fall for someone you would not have considered before, but who is perfect for you.


Get a boost in confidence by having multiple options, and multiple men telling you how awesome you are! And if one guy happens to not take interest, it’s no biggie. You have backups waiting in the wings.


It’s just a date. One of many. Both of you know you are just testing the waters with each other, so there’s no pressure (and no settling out of desperation).


With online dating you can learn what attracts you and what you really value in a man. You will also learn what turns you off, and what you don’t want in a man. If your date turns out to be a jerk, you can excuse yourself, and block him from contacting you again.


Online dating keeps you busy, and at the least, you get to go out and have a good meal. And if it’s not a love match, you might still make a new friend.
Guys crave a challenge. With online dating, you become instantly more attractive and desirable because men know they have to compete to win your heart (think The Bachelorette). You become the bait!


When men compete, they are forced to step up their game. Need I say more?

Now that you’re in the know, why not give online dating a try? After all, there’s nothing to lose if it doesn’t work out — and a lot to gain if it does!

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What to do if You are Burned out from Dating

If you’ve been chronically single for a while, you may start to feel like dating is no longer fun. You may even dread it. And who could blame you? The same old places to haunt, the same old small talk to make, and the same old lulls in conversation can get boring and tedious, to say the least. Don’t forget the worry about whether or not he will call or text you for a second date, and all the awkwardness of whether or not he’ll go in for a kiss. And then there is the whole monotony of having to get ready and all dressed to impress, and for what? Just to waste time meeting and having to let down another guy you don’t connect with — or worse, another guy who will eventually bruise your heart?

Tiffany here. Dating burnout is bound to happen at some point, but it doesn’t mean all hope is lost forever. Rest assured, it’s just a temporary setback, and you will get over it, if you know how. Here’s what to do if you find yourself burned out from dating.

Dating Detox

If dating is dragging you down, it’s okay to step aside and check out for a while. Stop being overscheduled and overwhelmed with one date after another. Instead, drive to the beach and enjoy a vacation with your best girlfriends, visit family or your old college roommate for the weekend, or just take a few weeks (or months) to focus on refreshing your outlook with a little me-time.

It’s okay to be alone, and you should embrace the freedom to do what you love, with no strings attached. Take up a new hobby and take your mind off of what’s troubling you. Or find excitement and joy in the little things, like reading a good mystery novel while drinking a Grande Mocha Frappuccino at Starbucks — table for one. You could just veg on the couch in your comfy sweats with a blanket, a bowl of popcorn and your favorite movie — no boys allowed. Take a breather, recharge your batteries, and detox from dating for a while. We promise you will feel much better if you do.

Attitude Adjustment

Think of it this way. When you are sick, you take care of yourself and take the time to rest and recuperate. The same should hold true when you are sick and tired of dating. You may even learn a little something about what you want in a relationship after your dating detox.

Now is the time to make a change for the better. Dip your toes in the dating pool instead of diving right in, and take the time to feel out the situation before saying yes to another date. You may just save yourself from becoming burned out again! Think of the types of men you have dated in the past. Why didn’t it work out? Now count how many dates you’ve been on in the recent past. Did you agree to go out with these people because you thought you had to, or because you wanted to?

Instead of saying yes to every Tom, Dick, and Harry or Tucker, Declan, and Holden, be selective and only say yes when you feel there might be a connection, and when you actually feel like going out! You are not obligated as a single girl to always say yes to a date. With that said, of course, keep an open mind. Some unexpected and not-so-obvious guy may surprise you if you give him a chance, while another who is attractive on the surface may be all wrong for you deep down inside. If you consistently are drawn to a certain type and it never turns out well for you, maybe it’s time to reconsider what is really important and attractive to you in a mate.

Take a break, focus on yourself for a while and don’t be afraid to be alone. Figure out what you want, adjust your outlook and attitude towards men, and dating, in the process. When you decide you are ready to start dating again, you will feel refreshed, renewed and maybe even excited about dating! Being comfortable with yourself and feeling confident and independent is attractive, and it will show. Guys will want to be around you, and you’ll find yourself surrounded by options. And you can choose whom, when and if you are ready.

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The Beginner’s Guide To Online Dating

If I had a dollar for every person I’ve met who found their perfect match online, I could buy myself a cute pair of Jimmy Choo sling-back pumps, and I wouldn’t be the only one with a new pair of shoes. According to a recent survey by the Pew Research Center, online dating is more popular now than ever before. A whopping 41% of American adults say they know someone who uses online dating, while 29% know someone who has married or entered a long-term relationship with someone they met online. It doesn’t hurt that most of the people who use online dating sites in the US are well educated and fairly affluent.

Tiffany here. Face it, online dating works, and there is proven research to back it up.  It’s a great tool for meeting new people, and there really is no reason to shy away from this proven method of dating. Think of it this way, while there are just a handful of potential boyfriends at any given bar or bookstore coffee shop, there are endless possibilities in the cyber dating world. You can have your pick of men online, and you can bet your confidence will sky rocket when you see just how many guys are into you!

Sounds wonderful, right? But, it still doesn’t change the fact that online dating can be scary and intimidating, especially for the beginner. Knowledge is power, and this helpful Beginner’s Guide to Online Dating can equip you with the information you need to get started on this modern path to love.

Online Dating 101

There are many online dating sites to choose from, and it’s up to you to determine which one is the best fit for you. Once you do, it’s time to set up your profile. You want to put your best foot forward, but you may not have a clue how. Here are seven helpful tips and smart rules to follow.

The Photo Dilemma: Sorry ladies, that selfie of you with the giant eyes and pouty duck lips (that got so many likes on Facebook) is not going to cut it. Try to avoid crazy angles that distort your features. Yes, you want a photo that makes you feel beautiful, but if he can’t recognize you when you finally meet, it’s false advertising. Instead, choose a great photo of yourself that actually looks like you, and showcases your awesome personality.


TMI (Too Much Information!): Don’t reveal too much about yourself. Write what you would feel comfortable sharing with a guy you just met at a bar. You wouldn’t empty the contents of your purse on the bar top, so don’t do it online. Give a little something to pique his interest without over sharing. Guys like a little mystery, and besides, you still have no idea what kind of guy he is, so why should he know all about you?


Good To Know: With that said, there is certain information you may want to mention in your profile, like favorite movies, bands, and books, or your interests and hobbies. After all, you want to meet someone you are compatible with, and having these things in common will give you something interesting to talk about on your first date. Write about things you would want your ideal date to respond to.


Keep Your Options Open: You’ve probably heard the old adage, “Don’t put all your eggs into one basket.” It’s been around for a long time, but it is still good advice today. When it comes to online dating, you can’t pin all your future hopes and dreams on one person you’ve just met. He may seem like the perfect guy right from the start, but things don’t always work out in the end. It’s best to line up a few dates and narrow the field as things progress.


Let It Go: If you find yourself just not feeling it, don’t be afraid to walk away. After a few emails back and forth, you should feel some sort of connection. He may be a really nice guy, but if he’s not for you, it’s OK to bow out and stop corresponding with him. You may even find yourself needing a break from dating altogether, and that’s fine too. Sometimes a few weeks are all you need to come back refreshed and ready to try again. Yes, there are duds out there, but there are extraordinary men as well. So do what you need to do, but don’t get discouraged.


Meet Cute (and Safe!): If you do find someone you really hit it off with online, there will come a time to meet face to face. This prospect can be both exciting, and horrifying! He may be a wonderful man, but you need to be safe. Always meet in a public place! This cannot be stressed enough. If he really is the wonderful man you think he is, he will understand.


Hello, Goodbye: If the date just isn’t what you expected, don’t be afraid to call it short. Maybe the sparks you had online just aren’t there in person, or maybe you really just aren’t a good match. And that’s okay. Not every guy you meet is going to be your soul mate. But remember, it only takes ONE. Online dating does work, but it is a process — so be patient.

Is Mr. Right out there, floating on a cloud somewhere, just waiting for you to come along? You’ll never know if you don’t give online dating a try!

Do you need helpful tips to create a dating profile that stands out from the crowd, and techniques to help you weed out the losers and find that extraordinary man you’re looking for? If so, check out Love is in the Mouse! Online Dating for Women: Crush Your Rivals and Start Dating Extraordinary Men by best selling author and Boston’s top dating coach, Gregg Michaelsen.

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Are YOU Putting Your Best Foot Forward?

Hi friends. It’s Kirbie today and I’m frustrated. I don’t know about you, but I am tired of wanting to lose the 10-12 pounds I need to lose. I got hot into exercise at the first of the year. Not because of a resolution – I don’t do those, but because my 3 adult daughters and I all wanted to challenge each other. Sadly, only one of us is still exercising and it ain’t me, unfortunately. I have a half-way good reason, but that’s not the point. Are you putting your best foot forward? I know I’m not!

Last weekend, I discovered a jewel of a show called Fit to Fat to Fit. The idea of this show is genius really. They pair a personal trainer with someone who needs to lose weight. The trainer visits the client and explains how he (the trainer) will be gaining weight over the next four months so he can better understand the plight of the client. The trainers, some of them a tad arrogant toward their client, learn some valuable lessons, but I learned one or two as well.

I’ve watched 3-4 episodes of the show now and what I have taken away from it will hopefully be the motivating factor I need to get moving again – after I recover from this darned bug.

On Day 1 of their working out together, after the trainer has gained upward of 50-60 pounds, he puts the client through a pretty tough workout. This afternoon, I watched a woman who just was really hard to get motivated. At one point, the trainer asked her, “Are you going to give up? HUH? HUH? I know you can do this, but do YOU?”

Her responses, which I don’t recall now, centered around denying her desire to give up. She was determined, although whiny. He pushed her way past what she perceived her limits to be. And here is where I come in. I know, I am certain, I do not push myself to my limits. I’ve had several surgeries on key joints over the last 10 or so years, and it does somewhat limit what I can do, but even still, I don’t push myself.

I need to take some of those workouts I see on PopSugar, the ones I dismiss as “too difficult” and go for it with one of them. I need to stop looking for the workout that looks “do-able” and go for one which looks like there’s no way I can do it – then just kill it.

Here is the difference. If I only choose a workout I can do now, what’s the challenge to my body? Sure, there is some, because I’m just that much overweight, but it won’t challenge me for long. It won’t force me to push myself. I’m 53 this May but that doesn’t mean I’m completely incapable of pushing myself physically.

In another show, another phrase spoke to me. The trainer said “How many times have you said “I’ll start on Monday”? (when it’s Tuesday). That’s me. I don’t know if it’s the Type A who resides within me sometimes or what, but I do the same thing. For some reason, I put it off, using ‘timing’ as an excuse.

So here’s the thing. I’m done making excuses! I’m done finding the workout that is ‘do-able’. I want the workout that’s not do-able. I want to push myself to a point past anything I’ve imagined. I want to be able to say I pushed myself as hard as I could and I did it! I can’t imagine how great that will feel!

I challenge you to do the same. Maybe it’s not a weight loss or strength building workout. Maybe it’s a new job or career challenge. Maybe you can challenge yourself to face a fear. Find a way to push yourself beyond what you perceive your limits to be (but be safe, of course!). At the end of my journey, I’ll try to remember to share with you my “before and after” info.

What’s your challenge? How will you be putting your best foot forward?

Game on!

If you’re really ready for a challenge, get ready for Gregg’s new book, Own Your Tomorrow: 14 Steps to Prepare for Love, due out on Amazon on February 21, and on sale for a limited time for just 99 cents! Sign up for Gregg’s newsletter at the top or bottom of this, or any page to stay informed!

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Little Ways to say I Love You without saying the Words

Tiffany here. Who would have thought three little words could be so huge? You feel it in your heart, but actually saying, “I love you” for the first time can be a tricky situation, and it’s often difficult to know just when the time is right. Say it too soon, and you risk scaring him away. Wait too long, and he may begin to doubt your feelings, and maybe even the relationship. Good news – it doesn’t have to be all or nothing! There are lots of little ways to show your love without ever uttering a word. You can build your emotional bond by letting him know you care through your actions. It’s the little things that count.

Actions Speak Louder Than Words

Boston dating coach, Gregg Michaelsen tells us men communicate differently than women. While they may not shout their feelings from the rooftop the way we tend to, we need to look closely at the things they do to show us they care. Does he put air in your tires and fill your gas tank before you leave to visit your sister who lives in another state? Does he call and check on you when you have to work late, or bring you your favorite coffee to help you get through a rough day? Does he fix the leg on the antique table your Grandmother gave you, or rub your back when you have a headache? It’s little things like this which prove his love for you. His actions are much more powerful than words. We can do the same with our own little ways to say, “I love you.”

Little Ways To Say I Love You

Keep this list handy for inspiration, and think of your own uniquely sweet ideas which symbolize something special about him, and your relationship.

Always kiss him hello
Leave little notes on his car windshield or bathroom mirror, or sneak them into his pocket
Cook his favorite meal, just for the two of you
Bake him cookies – just because
Bring him breakfast in bed after a romantic evening together
Take the time to get to know, and like, his friends
Take the time to bond with his family
Text or call him once during the day to let him know you are thinking of him
Hold hands whenever you can
Watch the Super Bowl with him, even if you hate football
Wear that red dress he loves so much
Make him a love song playlist, the modern equivalent of a mix tape
If you see something he would love, don’t be afraid to get him little surprise gifts to show he was on your mind, and how well you know him
Make him a handmade Valentine
Laugh at his corny jokes
Cut his hair or shave his beard – it’s actually surprisingly intimate!
Show appreciation when he does something nice for you
Give him the last french fry or bite of dessert
Show up with beer, pizza and his favorite movie if he’s had a rough day
Listen when he needs to vent
Ask him about his day, look him in the eyes, and give him your undivided attention
Cheer him on when he needs encouragement, and be supportive, not critical
Make a big deal of his accomplishments
Try your hand at golf if he loves to play, or a hobby he has a passion for. Who knows, you may develop a new interest!
Compliment him
Send him a letter if you are away and tell him you miss him
You chose him for a reason – don’t try to change him
Go with him to boring work functions
Ask his advice and respect his opinion
Help him with a difficult or tedious task
Back him up when someone puts him down
Three letters — PDA — because you are proud to be with him
Give him a foot massage when you are relaxing on the couch
Tell him when he does something you like in bed
Always kiss him goodnight

Eventually, if all goes well, one of you will finally say those three little words and mean it! But until that moment, treat him the way you like to be treated, and show him you care through your actions.

If you would like more suggestions on things you can do to strengthen your relationship, check out my book, Pennies in the Jar: How to Keep a Man for Life.

The post Little Ways to say I Love You without saying the Words appeared first on Who Holds the Cards Now.

3 Signs Your Boyfriend is Cheating on You

If you’ve ever been suspicious of your man, you may have had good reason to be. According to numerous studies, anywhere between 25% and 72% of men seek a little something on the side — and 70% of women have no idea their guy is cheating! No wonder infidelity is such a hot topic! Especially now, thanks to social media and sites like Tinder, it’s easier than ever to casually hook up with someone, no strings attached. While he may want to be in a relationship with you, he may still want to have sex with someone else. Face it, guys don’t always think with their brains. So how do you know if your guy has strayed? Anna is here today with 3 signs your boyfriend is cheating on you.

He Falls Off The Grid

Does he promise to call you right back and then you don’t hear from him for days? Does it take him hours to return your text when you know he’s not busy and his phone is always attached to his hip? Does he forget to call and check in while he’s on a business trip or out with his buddies for a guy weekend? Does he make excuses like his phone battery was “dead” – and he’s made that excuse more than once?  Does he show up late or cancel plans because he suddenly had to work late at night or got held up? You don’t need to keep tabs on him at all times (that’s a little stalker-ish), but if you happen to notice your guy is MIA more often than not, it’s time to wonder why.

He Guards His Phone With His Life

Most guys keep their phones with them most of the time. But does he take it everywhere he goes — like on frequent trips to the bathroom for example? Does he keep it locked under a password or switch it to airplane mode so you can’t see his incoming texts?  Does he freak out when you so much as touch his phone to move it off the coffee table?  If so, it may be time to do some investigating.

His Friends are All Players (and Hot Girls)

Like Gregg Michaelsen tells us in his best-selling dating advice books, if his best buddies are all players, he is probably guilty of being one himself. Do his friends go home with a different girl each night? Do they all seem commitment-phobic? Do they make lewd jokes about women – and does your guy laugh? Watch him closely the next time he’s with his crew and pay more attention when it’s just the two of you. Does he become a different person when he’s with the guys? Does he talk about other women in inappropriate ways? Is he is flirty with the waitress? Are all his Facebook friends hot girls? All these are clues to watch for!

More Signs Your Boyfriend is Cheating on You

He’s unusually nice to you (I mean excessively, gushingly nice when he’s not normally that way)
He starts bringing you flowers and expensive gifts for no reason (maybe because he feels guilty)
He doesn’t want to go out with you tonight, and then calls you later for a booty call (maybe because he was looking for someone else to take home and struck out)
After hanging with the guys, he crashes at a friend’s house (instead of at your house)
He’s suddenly a neat freak (who is this snappy dresser with the clean apartment, and what happened to that slob you met last year?)
He says he needs a night at home by himself (and then can’t be reached)
He’s on the defensive (why is he snapping at you over nothing)
He’s critical and makes you feel bad about yourself (because he is making comparisons perhaps)
He has some new moves in the bedroom (and wants to try them out with you)
You catch him lying (even tiny ones show he’s capable of being sneaky)

Forget looking for lipstick on the collar. Times have changed, and girlfriends need to be savvier than ever! Female intuition is a real thing so just the fact that you’re suspicious should be a real red flag. Trust your gut girls.

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