Pat Hatt's Blog, page 239

A Cheap Jungle Peep!

So time for a jungle peep show to be given a go. The cat went out and searched high and low for something better than a crow. In case you have not guessed by now, J is for jungle, and no, there is no cow.


We start with a cat.who would have guessed that?With his spots all aglow.He is normal unlike many below.

The frog with the big chin.That has to be a win.At least if your food were to drip,You'd catch it with that long of a trip.

A stripped deer,Something to fear.All legs I guess,Stuck in the middle of some grey matter mess.

Look it's Clint Eastwood.Never knew he hung out in the jungle hood.I guess it hangs any which way but loose.Maybe he'll go all Dirty Harry and kill a goose?

It's the guy who is all nose.Guess that is where they got the vaccuum hose.Waste a whole tree,If he got sneezy.

Think rock, think rock.Don't mock.Think rock, think rock.If only my eyes could cock.

A monkey skunk,With some armpit funk.Two doses in one,My the jungle is fun.

Look it's Brian.Okay, maybe I'm lyin'He seems a little blue,But styling his fancy doo.

Look it's Brian.He may send me flyin'Maybe the first was his twin,Both sporting mohawks for the win.

And another cat,That will chew up your doormat.Along with your door.Not to be messed with at any jungle shore.Did you enjoy your jungle cruise? It was free, so how could you lose? Of course if you catch one of these things, like growing turkey wings, that is on you. Maybe a huge chin will come due? The jungle sure has quite the class, including relatives of my little rhyming ass.
Experience spring, have a fling.

How Low You Sink When You Drink!

So for I the cat figured he would do something he has not in a while at his zoo. Make fun of all of you? Bah, I do that more often than not so that is untrue. We will go the Irish way as for I it is another Irish Drinking Song on display.

Ohhhh, aye-dee-di-dee-di-dee-di-dee-di-dee-di-dee-di!
First comes a lurker who's top of the pack,
Can be a real tear jerker if Brian sets Hank back.
But then you get not one or two or three,
Brian goes on a comment run, drunk with glee.
Then comes a poke from a strange rock.
I hope she doesn't choke on a dirty sock.
Manzanita brings forth a rhyme that can be as random as can be,
Magic potion isn't a crime but it might make you pee.

Ohhhh, aye-dee-di-dee-di-dee-di-dee-di-dee-di-dee-di!
Hank returns once again after regaining his composure,
Being down below ten must feel like a foreclosure.
Then comes a Candida Journey that at first glance,
Might sound like a tourney of drunks doing the chicken dance.
I can't be Optimistic at all as an Existentialist graces my hall.
For with a name so long and tall, I bet he doesn't miss last call.
That was a Slamdunk at least for the cat,
With some junk in your trunk you may look like a rat.

Ohhhh, aye-dee-di-dee-di-dee-di-dee-di-dee-di-dee-di!
Adam gives a fact then talks in Japanese,
I wonder if he can do such an act when he has to sneeze?
Betsy and her flock of cats surround as a rhyme is sung.
But she is less profound and maybe sounds drunk with a numb tongue.
Auntie sezzzzzzzzzzzz must really need a good nap.
Or it's a tease and she uses z instead of x to avoid a bad rap.
Just Keepin It Real, Folks is a mouth full to say,
But just light up some smokes and watch her camel toe on display.

Ohhhh, aye-dee-di-dee-di-dee-di-dee-di-dee-di-dee-di!
I hear you have in your hand some mail4rosey.
Put it on the night stand and if it's good things may get cozy.
Sherry rhymes with scary, but you already knew that.
Still with a blubber duck lip as red as berry, she could even scare a nat.
da tabbies o trout towne may leave you a turd,
For such a crown, just mention a dreadful burd.
Susan Kane comes and joins in for a little toast.
I hear if you drop some coins she'll perform a weenie roast.

Ohhhh, aye-dee-di-dee-di-dee-di-dee-di-dee-di-dee-di!
Theresa comes with an admission to one and all,
She cleans everything into submission letting loose her freak call.
Waffles finally makes it around giving the cat a little diddy,
It seems he heard a tweeting sound that made him quite giddy.
Brian the cat comes wearing his usual hat,
He should use that to counter surf at his mat.
A pal named Al gets off his sidewalk loo and comes for a view.
I bet you had no clue he has to wait until July before coming at his zoo.

Ohhhh, aye-dee-di-dee-di-dee-di-dee-di-dee-di-dee-di!
A golden eagle lands on a nearby perch,
I hear she's not so regal doing things with a feather that got her kicked out of church.
Claudia comes with her sax and blows a tune,
If you pay a dVerse tax she may really make you swoon.
Fred said he read a dead bed can hurt the head.
I think something he was fed had a ton of led.
Anne swings on by and gives a night chime,
I feel dirty with such a cry knowing its time for adult time.
And last and maybe least comes a one eyed beast,
Who was sited by a priest for her whine as into the wilderness she was released.

Oh, aye-dee-di-dee-di-dee-di-dee-di-dee-di-dee-di!
Oh, aye-dee-di-dee-di-dee-di-dee-diiii-deeee-diiii-deeee-diiiiiii!

The cat sure had fun giving that a run. Even though he may have gotten a tad dirty if not a little flirty. But hey, I just repeated what was said by all of you at your or my zoo. Made some stuff up too. Sadly not about Al and his sidewalk loo. Now the Irish in me has come to pass as some may curse my little rhyming ass.

Experience spring, have a fling.

Some dVerse Head, That's What I Said!

Oh the dVerse thoughts that come to your mind as you read the title from my little rhyming behind. But I won't make you stutter as you're the one who went to the gutter. Either way for H we will explore all the previous headers at my bay. For they can sure be quite the display and some may not have seen or forgotten as well. Plus the bush with the tush is back to cause hell.


Took up tons of room.Which caused some scrolling doom.But the earth wast controlled by the feline,With a hat that looked divine.
Also actually looked like Pat,Unlike the rest at our mat.Just look at Cassie cat,Thinking I'm crazy and all of that.

I still rule all,Staring you down with glowing eyes at our hall.Cassie still thinks I'm nuts,Even a bush that gives people the butts.
Yep, it moons away,To all on display.Pat is all Star Trek looking too.Who knew?

A bigger bush with a tush,Probably makes it easier to push.Plus the cat is still king,Here at his wing.
Tons of litterbox sand too,Can automatically use the loo.And that suck up Cassie,I hope Pat gets gassy.

Then comes the one above,Which gets lots of love.One of the favorites at my sea,But all are liked by me.
For I'm a superhero cat,Ruling the world and all of that.No more suck up Cassie cat,But then there is pink Pat.
I suppose it could be worse.Pat could look all perverse.Just have a gander below,Bad choice of words, I know.



And this one is new,I had done up for my zoo.Haven't used it yet,Does it make me look like a cocky pet?
There we go. I think I have once more scared all enough at my show. But it was truly dVerse and a bit perverse. As I always say, TMI is never at play at my bay. So make your header grand, make your header fun. Go out and moon the sun, it might impress someone. That is the end of my H sass with all the headers containing my little rhyming ass.
Experience spring, have a fling.

I Tell No Lies, It's Guys And Guys!

NEWSFLASH - Make a Dash!
Contemplated putting this at my bay as not sure yet if they pay, but what the hell, after all my damn work have to ring this bell. Need a big favor from one and all for the cat needs 100 students at his hall. Yep, a teacher now. Doesn't that make you go wow? Take it or not, just sign up a whole lot. And best of all it is FREE! With the below coupon code given by me. So take 2 minutes and sign up for the cat, and maybe even learn a trick or two at your mat. FREE too! So get to it, you! And spread it around with glee, because after all it is FREE!

Coupon Code: TT24G9
PLATFORM YOURSELF
(Pssst 5 Star review would be nice too from your zoo)
Now on with the show as G is given a go!
The cat thought for G he would give a great Guy sight to all of thee. For many female readers follow the cat. It is only fair I give something back at my mat. So away we go with plenty of guys to show.

Doesn't he make you swoon?Who wouldn't like the genie from the Aladdin cartoon?Plus he's out of this world as well.I know, he must make you sweaty as hell.


Just look how he rocks the duster.He must have quite the groupie cluster.And those glasses and that hair.My he is truly rare.

Time to head off to Never Never Land.Isn't that hook grand?Could sure reel you in.A bit pointy, but that isn't a sin.

The glasses make a return.That dress must make your stomach turn.You can't handle his flair.I should charge a fare.

Don't you love a guy with friends?Not sure what kind of message it sends,If he hangs with a dead guy.But to each their own under the sky.

Who knew he could grow his hair so long?I bet he makes your heart sing a song.With his curly haired friend,He at least got over his dead trend.

That leather has to bring them in.Those sunglasses sure aren't a sin.Things also look really sharp.He must pull at the strings of your harp.

Flexible too.Who knew?All covered in gold.You must be sold.

Oops, maybe not.Not paying taxes isn't so hot.Guess you'll have to be pen pals.Sorry about that, gals.


With that deadly hand,He can defend you across the land.Look at that chin,I bet you enjoy that at your bin.

Look how he lifts that leg.And not a thing seems to sag.Don't let all that red,Go to your head.

The grand daddy of them all.It's the billionaire of the wall.Bad boys are liked too, right?Even if unlike Superman he can't take flight.

At least he can pucker up.I bet he makes a mean coffee cup.Might get a kink in the neck though.But he is a billionaire you know.
Now you can't say the cat never does anything for you at his bay. Enjoy the choices I gave and feel free to rant and rave. Even pop a Tootsie roll. Damn, that may have been a gutter stroll. There is sure something for every lass thanks to my little rhyming ass.
Experience spring, have a fling.

Don't Neglect, Reach Out And Connect!

So the other day the cat was going to that other bay and we saw a sign, that was pretty sad to the feline. You know, one of those ones outside a grocery or any other store with words aglow. It said "follow us on Facebook" which just made me shake my head. Someone actually took the time to move the letters around to say that? I guess they are desperate for Facebook followers at their mat. But we can have some fun as we reach out and connect a ton.

Look at our sign,
Aren't we divine?
Follow us on Facebook and Twitter,
Now now, don't get bitter.

Just because you used your phone,
And now a ticket adds to your debt loan.
Should have stopped first,
After reading our burst.

At least now you know,
When 15% off cupboards are at our show.
But why stop with us?
Just look at the side of each bus.

Follow your bank!
Give it a yank.
Now you will know,
When stocks are low.

You know the drill,
Follow and like at our hill.
Then when it's time to drill and fill,
You'll know to pop a pain pill.

By joining our feed,
You will get all you need.
Life, medical, dental and even disability.
All are cheap at our sea.

By following our stuff,
When things get rough,
Give us a tweet,
We'll sue off their feet.

Watch your eyes,
As they swirl like flies.
Now with your like,
You'll know when Candy pretends to use the mic.

Could follow us as well.
Just ring the like bell.
Then when it is time for a shot,
With your pants down you'll still be caught.

Can you tell we are desperate as can be?
Even posting a sign on a tree.
Why will no one like?
Don't many want to take a funeral home hike?

Some things should just not be followed at our sea as they are just strange and creepy. But I suppose all are parts of life. Could follow if you need to divorce your wife or have bad teeth. Maybe if you need 15% off a wreath. But on following or liking I'll take a pass, no one needs to shove a shot in my little rhyming ass.

Experience spring, have a fling.

Floccinaucinihilipilification Brings Need For A Vacation!

If you can say floccinaucinihilipilification three times fast the power of your tongue is vast. Isn't it fun to watch? With a floccinaucinihilipilification this and a floccinaucinihilipilification that you may reach for the scotch. Can you guess my F word for today? Now now, no swearing at my bay. So let's floccinaucinihilipilification up ourselves a display that explains what floccinaucinihilipilification is to all today.



A real floccinaucinihilipilification affair.At least you can cover your hair.Plus you can blows your nose,Unless of course the wind blows.

Need a snack?Go on this floccinaucinihilipilification attack.Just watch what you chew,For you may lose a finger or two.

Screw the underwear.This floccinaucinihilipilification thing is more rare.They protect your hands when it rains,And you don't have to worry about those nagging brown stains.

Scary floccinaucinihilipilification at work.At least you can look beserk.Might get thrown in the loony bin.Of course for some that may not be a sin.

A double covered loo,That must be used by two.Floccinaucinihilipilification really flows through.Might want to flush this one from view.

Floccinaucinihilipilification surely applies,As all they do is tell lies.Plus can't even pretend to be wise,And are more annoying than flies.

Speaking of flies,And the uber unwise.Anything with reality tv,Gets a floccinaucinihilipilification call from me.

Floccinaucinihilipilification is sure at play,As you block out the light of day.But at least you won't know,When someones near is scratching down below.

A sign to tell you not to touch the sign.My you humans are divine.The cat needs to sit down,This surely belongs in floccinaucinihilipilification town.

And last but surely not least,Comes this fancy feast.I guess taking your watermelons for a floccinaucinihilipilification stroll,Makes them tastier than a lump of coal.
So have you guessed what floccinaucinihilipilification is from my little picture biz? Or did you already know? Either way, now you will know at my show. Floccinaucinihilipilification means utterly worthless crap and that can be seen here on tap. Now you know about this floccinaucinihilipilification word mass, all thanks to my little rhyming ass.
Experience spring, have a fling.

Large And In Charge!

So for E I didn't want to do Easter, as it's over and may make some curse my keester. Of course that is fun too but I figured an increase should come due. So for E it is time to Enlarge at my sea.

Some things are ever so small,
We'll avoid giving the gutter a call.
But I'm sure it is a wish,
To enlarge such things on ones dish.

Enlarge your feet,
That would be sweet.
Enlarge your home,
To the size of Rome.

Will need to enlarge your street.
But can gain more ground with large feet.
Enlarge your electric bill,
Enlarge your cleaning thrill.

Enlarge your lawn,
Enlarge seems like a long con.
Now you need more income,
As you give an enlarge hum.

With your enlarged room,
Enlarged furniture blooms.
Enlarge your bed,
Making it cause dread.

Enlarge your tub,
Damn thing can fit a sub.
Takes an hour to fill up,
Even to bath a pup.

Which has an enlarged space,
To enjoy a messy embrace.
Enlarged enough from view,
That more mess can be caused for you.

Enlarged space for the relatives too,
As they come and bother you.
Enlarged garage you have to fill,
Upping your insurance bill.

For you need that enlarged car,
With all the bells and whistles, including its own bar.
Enlarging your liquor bill,
Making your liver feel ill.

What fun this enlargement plot,
To flaunt to all who have a small cot.
When our enlarged crap,
Barely ever even gets used after falling into the enlargement trap.

Look at the cat going all high ground today. Who knows what can happen when from the gutter I stray. But never fear I will go back, plenty upcoming may give one a heart attack. What were you hoping for a magic pill for things to umm fill? Could not resist one final enlargement pass. I can't go fully out of the gutter with my little rhyming ass.

Experience spring, have a fling.

With The Mind Of A Raisin, Back Comes Drazin!

Where to begin with this third person talking nut who has forever plagued my hut? Ever since the cat and Pat tried to get across the border we've had to deal with his short bus order. He has had weird clones and gave off plenty of cat slipper groans. Of course many may not know. So for D Drazin comes back to my show.

He started out at another sea,
Before he came to bother me.
Just look at that mug.
Doesn't he look like a thug?

So then he came,
Talking his third person game.
With a rather annoying claim,
That he was a God of fame.

The Great God Duke Drazin,
With the mind of a raisin,
Came after us time and time again,
Even beating on Tarsier Man at our den.


Then through some sort of weird pass,
He was on the side of my little rhyming ass.
I guess Island of the Gawker did that,
With Glitch of a Witch also at our mat.

He even has an incarnation in the novels of Pat,
Which brings shame to the cat.
Although not as much as this,
For now he truly is a God you can't miss.


That is right!
Drazin gets to see the children's book light.
He gets to share it with a mutt,
Who likes to sniff a butt.


This incarnation is really mean though.
He tosses gods to and fro.
Will he win in the end?
I guess you'll have to wait until The Divine Shrine comes around my bend.

Now without further adieu, the nut can come bore all of you.

"Drazin is glad you finally shut up, fleabag. All of this rhyming crap has Drazin ready to make you and that other fleabag into slippers once again. But Drazin is proven to be a god with your next book. So Drazin will let you be, although Drazin expects a royality. Damn, Drazin is now rhyming which Drazin hates. So off Drazin will go until Drazin is needed for further dates."

Now isn't he fun?
Saying his name by the ton.
Now all know,
Drazin and his red eyed glow.

The mook has been here a while so I thought for D I'd turn it to his dial. Plus got to plug a new book that will soon be coming to my nook. It stars a mook and a mutt. Almost drives me to sniff a butt. I also had to hold back the sass from Cass or this would have been a huge post from my little rhyming ass.

Experience spring, have a fling.

At My Dune We Look At The Cartoon!

And Now The Cat Can Say He Is An Amazon Best Seller At His Bay! The cat is again not going to be obvious at his sea. For I won't do cat for C. Instead we are going with cartoon. Those that were enjoyed by this loon. Or at least seen a while back, as now many lack. So let's live in a cartoon land where all can do a hand stand.


It is a wannabe hand stand,As they gaze across the land.So who gives a umm cluck,It's a talking duck.

Also your teeth will shine.They will always look divine.So well in fact,You'll smile even when doing an evil act.

And we could save on cat food.With mice as big as any dude.They would last this cat a year.Although they look like they could cause fear.

Looking up is a sport.You don't even need a court.Just look up and make a funny face,Much easier than a three legged race.

Mice wave as they get eaten.Knowing they are beaten.Also a cat can moo?Hmm that just would not do.

All would be thin.Now there is a win.Or at least curve so well,Their rump could ring the doorbell.

Bears hibernate no longer.This makes their color stronger.Then like Lance Armstrong they juice.I guess they like to bounce and let loose.

Brains move to your belly,Making certain movements less smelly.They even have a mind of their own.A brain giving a brain groan.

The farm will come alive.If the cat let's the rooster survive.And that fact still holds true,Shiny teeth, even if only two.


More mice on display.Cartoon world just makes my day.And you can even have a red nose,No one cares even if it glows.


Could even go green,With a flying pony scene.No more need for planes,Except maybe if it rains.

I could go all cliche,With a that's all folks at my bay.But I just have to say,Animals grow, humans shrink, but that's okay!
Did you get them all? That last one doesn't count at my hall. A dead giveaway with it's looney display. Doesn't cartoon land sound fun? I could eat and run. Mice do seem to show in mass but that works for my always hungry little rhyming ass.
Experience spring, have a fling.

A dVerse Blogland Display With Many Of You At My Bay!

So today is the big day that the cat has been going on about at his bay. I thought what better way to use B than to shout out all of thee. Could it be my title rhyming fun? Nope, that has been done. Could it be an episode of Whoopdi Friggin Doo making fun of all of you? Wrong again! Get ready, for things are truly going to get dVerse at my den.

So many have come and many have gone,
But there are many who come each day to my lawn.
So the cat thought why not,
Use the knowledge he has gained from the lot.

And oh how the things you say,
At your bay,
Can come back to haunt.
But it is so fun to taunt.

Also thanks to many at my show,
I now have children's books all aglow.
So I figured why not combine the two.
Making a representation of many who come to my zoo.

So if you have come here steady before 2013 or so,
You may just find you have been cartoonized at my show.
Now without further adieu,
Can you guess which one is likely you?


The goose has the last name Air,Wonder who that could be at my lair? That mowhawk sure does rhyme with gawk.Doesn't such a one eye come as a shock?I will at least help thee,The cat is a representation of me.

Across the map a journey takes place.Look at that rock with a smiley face.And a navy dressed ant with a toilet seat,Dances to a certain sax players beat.

He is the tower now,No longer standing it front of it some how.She said she had a big puffed duck bill lip.The cat with the hat is rather hip.And I hear the mutt is named Mary And she can be rather contrary.

The dodo bird takes the form of two,Who may need a beer to come due.Such a heavenly grace with that smiling face.A sack of potatoes is on the case.Then one who asks questions a lot,Is also doing an optimistic hot to trot.

A hat instead of a crown,That kitty may frown.Another is all rosey with the mail.The next is all green with tap shoes that never fail.The last is no punk,He goes for the slam dunk.

Another is a Fran of dice.Then there is a redneck with lots of spice.Of course the zebra is Pat,What else would he be at our mat?And that dwerp on the end,Has quite the miming trend.

The first here,Got buried in the dirt I fear.The there is a grumpy goo,Who is known by many of you.The rhino is surely working,While that last one is Miss Priss lurking.

These two are mostly extinct in blogland,First is a silver coyote taking a stand.Then a Blabber pig.Next comes a literary hound who's collection is big.Finally a bunny with a spoon,Who dances about like a loon.
Here we have a stretchy human waffle type guy.A rockin robin who can really fly.A day dreaming cloud,And this cactus can tell you items in a Japanese word cloud.

And this is the book in which many star,That visit my blogland bar.Can be found here!Just a little something from the cat to let you know you are all appreciated by my little rhyming rear.
And as for guesses from all,This are the ones that are shown in the Tune's book hall.
A Beer For The ShowerAdamAlAnneBetsy Brian(human)Brian(cat)Claudia Daydreamertoo ElisaElsie Fran Fred GloriaGrumpy GooHank Heaven I am such a dwerpJax Keepin it Real, FolksMail4rosey Manzanita Mary My Journey with CandidaOptimistic ExistentialistPoke the RockRawkin RobynSherry Ellis  SlamdunkSpitty the KittyThe Silver FoxWorkingdanYeamiewaffles
So good luck figuring out the cat's representation of you,That he thought up at his zoo.With a little help from you,This one was sure fun to do.
Wow, that was long indeed. But many come to my feed. Wasn't that grand for B in my land? So how many have you guessed from this blogland mass? After all of that, I need to nap my little rhyming ass.

Experience spring, have a fling.