Pat Hatt's Blog, page 179
November 15, 2014
In The Cheap Trickle Along With The Fickle!
The cat watched the other day as some bid on things at another bay. He thought it would be a fun experiment to toy with people at his sea. I know, so mean of me. So he put up a fake ad or two on Kijiji and let the fun ensue.
Price is firm,
Was a used term.
Would you take this or that?
Hmm am I a Spanish talking cat?
How about this?
This price is not a miss.
Have pity on me.
That is all the money I have at my sea.
Hmmm right!
Cheapo #1 in site.
Nope Hank, not talking to you.
Your streak is still in view.
Have to pick up,
Seemed to be another hiccup.
Can you deliver it?
Was said more than a bit.
Why are you ignoring me?
Because you can't read dumbie.
No, didn't respond to any,
As there were too many.
Plus it was fake.
All so a post I could make.
No harm no foul,
Just a whine and a howl.
I was an undercover cat.
Could become a thing at my mat.
Hmmm I like that.
The undercover cat.
Oh yes, stop talking to myself,
Or that elf on the shelf.
It is a year old and in good shape.
People truly are as dumb as an ape.
Insult to apes I think,
Has to be a missing link.
What kind of shape is it in?
Can't you read? What a sin.
Will you take this much?
Why aren't you in touch?
You are rude for ignoring me.
Can I come over to see?
Oh the fun the cat can create, at least for me as I watch a common trait. Cheapos everywhere, even for fake stuff at their lair. If the cat ever has to sell a thing he would rather tie it to a piece of string, stick the other end on the car and turn it to tar. Of course that would waste gas, but it does not bother my little rhyming ass.
Later all, have a nice fall.
Price is firm,
Was a used term.
Would you take this or that?
Hmm am I a Spanish talking cat?
How about this?
This price is not a miss.
Have pity on me.
That is all the money I have at my sea.
Hmmm right!
Cheapo #1 in site.
Nope Hank, not talking to you.
Your streak is still in view.
Have to pick up,
Seemed to be another hiccup.
Can you deliver it?
Was said more than a bit.
Why are you ignoring me?
Because you can't read dumbie.
No, didn't respond to any,
As there were too many.
Plus it was fake.
All so a post I could make.
No harm no foul,
Just a whine and a howl.
I was an undercover cat.
Could become a thing at my mat.
Hmmm I like that.
The undercover cat.
Oh yes, stop talking to myself,
Or that elf on the shelf.
It is a year old and in good shape.
People truly are as dumb as an ape.
Insult to apes I think,
Has to be a missing link.
What kind of shape is it in?
Can't you read? What a sin.
Will you take this much?
Why aren't you in touch?
You are rude for ignoring me.
Can I come over to see?
Oh the fun the cat can create, at least for me as I watch a common trait. Cheapos everywhere, even for fake stuff at their lair. If the cat ever has to sell a thing he would rather tie it to a piece of string, stick the other end on the car and turn it to tar. Of course that would waste gas, but it does not bother my little rhyming ass.
Later all, have a nice fall.
November 14, 2014
A Little More Hate At My Gate!
The cat just feels like ranting today at his bay. What can I say? Feel free to join the fray. The cat doesn't mind providing a little relief and letting you rant about your grief.
First you have idiots upon high,
Who I wouldn't care if they up and die.
Let's shrink the packaging and charge the same price.
Maybe not die, but I hope they get mutant lice.
Idiots in the parking lot who go round and round.
Thinking a spot up close will be found.
When they have to walk in the damn store anyway.
Lazy turds need a face full of what's in my litter tray.
The mind readers who think they are so great,
That you should instantly have a mind reading trait.
They don't have to tell you what they want.
Instead, in their want should go at your haunt.
The mooch at work who thinks they can take,
Anything on your desk and theirs they can make.
The mooch at home who takes it all.
Thankfully none of them at my hall.
Whiners who would rather sit on their ass and whine,
Whining all day and hurting the ears of the feline,
Instead of doing something about it.
But nooo, they'd rather whine, hiss and spit.
The people who come and say "followed you"
Pfffffft whoopdi friggin doo.
Shove it up the old gazoo.
If that is it, I'd rather clean the loo.
The politically correct nut who sits and glares,
If you say something out of place he/she stares.
Yep, a glare and a stare can be different you know.
Then they try and correct you on the go.
Stupid blogger and its Error 503.
That is all it seems to give me.
No 500, 389 or 242.
Oh no! Just error 503 comes due.
People who think they can cut in line,
Because their nose is in the air and they are divine.
They can take their rump to the back,
I'll take the grocery divider thing and give them a whack.
People who think they know it all and are never wrong.
Whether MD, street bum or in between they sing the same song.
They think everything they say is pure gold.
I hope their feet turn into zombie toes and they get mold.
There was my rant for the day. So nice to do at my bay. Any of those you agree with at my sea? Any you want to share below with me? Let it fly like a bad case of gas. I also hate if that comes out my little rhyming ass.
Later all, have a nice fall.
First you have idiots upon high,
Who I wouldn't care if they up and die.
Let's shrink the packaging and charge the same price.
Maybe not die, but I hope they get mutant lice.
Idiots in the parking lot who go round and round.
Thinking a spot up close will be found.
When they have to walk in the damn store anyway.
Lazy turds need a face full of what's in my litter tray.
The mind readers who think they are so great,
That you should instantly have a mind reading trait.
They don't have to tell you what they want.
Instead, in their want should go at your haunt.
The mooch at work who thinks they can take,
Anything on your desk and theirs they can make.
The mooch at home who takes it all.
Thankfully none of them at my hall.
Whiners who would rather sit on their ass and whine,
Whining all day and hurting the ears of the feline,
Instead of doing something about it.
But nooo, they'd rather whine, hiss and spit.
The people who come and say "followed you"
Pfffffft whoopdi friggin doo.
Shove it up the old gazoo.
If that is it, I'd rather clean the loo.
The politically correct nut who sits and glares,
If you say something out of place he/she stares.
Yep, a glare and a stare can be different you know.
Then they try and correct you on the go.
Stupid blogger and its Error 503.
That is all it seems to give me.
No 500, 389 or 242.
Oh no! Just error 503 comes due.
People who think they can cut in line,
Because their nose is in the air and they are divine.
They can take their rump to the back,
I'll take the grocery divider thing and give them a whack.
People who think they know it all and are never wrong.
Whether MD, street bum or in between they sing the same song.
They think everything they say is pure gold.
I hope their feet turn into zombie toes and they get mold.
There was my rant for the day. So nice to do at my bay. Any of those you agree with at my sea? Any you want to share below with me? Let it fly like a bad case of gas. I also hate if that comes out my little rhyming ass.
Later all, have a nice fall.
November 13, 2014
Blogvengers Part Seven, Some Go To Heaven!
Another review for Pat, click here to visit stat!
Chapter 7
Pushing Up Flowers
Zombies With Powers
Drazin drove through each zombie he saw. He was glad there was no zombie road kill law. The rest of the group still tried to wrap their head around what Betsy had done. Drazin listened as their tale was spun.
"First she wanted to feed Drazin, then she was a half zombie freaky thing and now she feeds people to zombies. Does Drazin sense a trend there or what?"
Drazin smirked while the rest ignored him. They all felt their situation was grim. All their friends were now dead. All they really wanted was a nice comfy bed.
"I'm number one. I should be driving." Hank declared out of nowhere. He looked the other way as Drazin gave him an evil glare.
"Look out!" Brian yelled out and Drazin slammed on the brakes heeding his shout.
"Drazin can never catch a break."
"I want that." Alex grinned as a zombie with a guitar strapped to him, waved his huge arms like a tree limb.
"It's arms are bigger than its body." Mary curled up in the back, not wanting to face another zombie attack.
The super powered zombie waved its arms in the air and they seemed to send out a tune that would raise even a deaf person's neck hair. The group covered their ears while the zombie seemed to be looking for cheers.
"Drazin will put an end to this."
Drazin stepped on the gas, going for another zombie run over pass. But as soon as he got near the zombie brought his arms near. They caught the car between them and began to crush it. The group all started to have a fit.
"I'm number one. I told you I should drive."
Drazin smacked Hank upside his head. He was not about to lose to some super undead. The car continued to be crushed bit by bit and the roof Drazin started to hit. It was rising up from the crushing of the zombie and soon all the rest joined in on his spree. The roof popped off and all jumped free. Hank continued to shout he was number one with glee.
"I want that guitar." Alex declared, he felt to beat this zombie he was prepared.
"Drazin will leave it to you then. Have at it."
Alex grabbed a rock as the rest sat back and continued to gawk. He biffed it at the zombie's head. It got stuck there seeming to bring the zombie little dread.
"That was your big plan? Drazin could have done that."
"Maybe if we all do it at once."
"Drazin doesn't have time for this."
Drazin searched the ground and took a gun off the dead guy that he found. He checked to see if it had any ammo in it. He found that it had one shot left that it could spit. He shrugged and walked up in front of the group, ready to turn this zombie into mush like soup. He aimed at the zombie head and then to the car. Alex cried out, "No!" as Drazin blew up the zombie and its guitar.
"Now that takes care of that." Drazin dropped the gun and by shooting the gas tank he had impressed almost everyone.
"My..my...guitar." Alex fell to his knees and cried, forgetting about his pride.
"At least you have this, from number one."
Hank handed Alex a guitar string he had found on the ground. Alex stuck it in his pocket and joined the group. They continued walking, not knowing where to go, hoping no more zombies threw them for a loop.
****************************************
"Oh this will be the cream of the crop. We kill them and they count as bonus points." Theresa kept her hand on the button to her trap door as she was ready to kill some more.
"A little blood thirsty. I like it." Manzanita stopped playing with her herb collection upon Theresa's detection.
Truedessa, Pat and the cats were coming down the street. They were walking to their own beat. They all seemed as happy as can be, despite being in this over run zombie reality. Truedessa noticed the flower stand and thought it was grand. She wanted some and Cassie thought they looked better to eat than a plum.
"Get out of here cat." Theresa shooed Cassie away after she jumped up and tried to snack on their flower display.
"The cat can't take her anywhere. But they do have flowers to spare."
"I don't trust these wenches. Who sells flowers with such demons about?" Pat listened to the voices in his head and knew these two were going to cause them dread.
"They are only flowers, Pat." Truedessa ran up to the table and looked them over. To her flowers were as great as a fire hydrant was to rover.
Pat noticed Theresa's hand hidden away. He smiled while they told him how much he needed to pay.
"How much are they?"
"For you Truedessa, only....your life." Theresa cackled and pulled the lever. She and Manzanita thought they were clever.
"But....but....our streak." Manzanita looked less than thrilled as the pair and the cats were not billed.
Theresa and Manzantia just glared at the pair while Truedessa took a flower and placed it in her hair. They were standing on thin air. Theresa then began to swear. They would have them added to the streak. They were too busy yelling at the two to die to notice Orlin and Cassie ready to kick them in the butt cheek. Both cats stood ready to go. Pat nodded and yanked Truedessa to the side while the two cats sent Theresa and Manzanita below. They mule kicked them in the butt and their killing streak ending with them making the final cut.
"I guess all the flowers are now yours." Pat laughed as he hit the button and closed the trap door. He never knew Manzanita had such a loud roar.
"I think they are mine!" Cassie jumped up and began to chow down. She always loved eating flowers no matter the town.
"I deserve a few too. I'll eat the blue." Orlin jumped up and joined in, both happy they were able to win.
"So?" Pat raised his eyebrows to Truedessa and waited for it while glaring at the covering to the pit.
"You were right. The wenches were evil. But the flowers weren't."
"They will be when they come out of me and Cassie."
The cats finished up their snack while Truedessa gave Pat a playful whack. They noticed zombies off in the distance coming their way and knew it was no time for play. They all continued on their way, hoping soon to spot the towers that led home to their bay.
****************************************
Betsy limped along the street, having burns from her head to her feet. She was not sure how she survived the blast. But she knew her clean house was a thing of the past. She had seen signs a while back when gathering supplies for her shack. They said, "Blogger Sanctuary This Way," so she decided to follow them as she was in need a of a new bay.
She came to a gate and peered through. She caught a few people in view. She yelled the best she could, finding that she was misunderstood. They seemed to think she was a zombie. A familiar face came up to her ready to set her free.
"Eddie..." Betsy whispered, falling to her knees as she felt a cool breeze.
Eddie Bluelights opened the gate and yanked Betsy through, realizing her burnt to a crisp fate. He lugged her over to a bench and sat her down giving his fist a clench.
"I really hate zombies."
"Is that Betsy?" Gloria looked Betsy up and down. She was glad Betsy had made it to her town.
Gloria ran to tell the others they had a new recruit and that she looked like she had taken on a zombie brute. Gloria then went back to her kitchen she had set up. She poured some soup in to a cup. She glanced at all her dishes on the way out. Zombie head on a plate, zombie toes, zombie liver, were all enough to make any normal person shout. But she fried them up good and knew they had to eat at their new hood.
"Have some zombie soup to regain your strength."
Betsy spit the soup out when she heard the name. She thought Gloria was playing some game. The three then heard a big commotion at the gate. It seemed the town was in for a doomed fate.
Eddie helped Betsy to her feet and the three watched people scurry about the street. Mary Kirkland was running away with her rats. Al was gearing up some barbed wire bats. Betty took in the view from a bench. Stephanie Faris held up a huge wrench. Mama Zen had a chainsaw ready. Susan Gourley was writing her memoir quite steady. The group all seemed preparing for war or something more.
"What is going on?" Eddie yelled out, with most ignoring his shout.
"She has brought zombies upon us. A whole army of them. Damn, woman." Holy Ghost Writer screamed and ran, not wanting a zombie tan.
The gates began to shake and creak. Before long there was no more zombie hide and seek. They busted through the gate and hundreds of zombies came through at an alarming rate. They sniffed out everybody before long and the group of zombies were just too strong. The group had been taken down from dozens to what looked like just three. Gloria, Betsy and Eddie.
"There is nowhere to run." Gloria looked for a way to go. But zombies were at every exit high and low.
"I'll go down fighting." Eddie was ready as he held up a log good and steady.
Betsy smiled finding a second chance and hopped back while Gloria and Eddie took their stance. Zombies rushed them both and soon they were heading south, right into the zombies stomach cavity. the zombies then crowded around Betsy.
"We will clean this place up and call it home. Now that you have full stomachs, let's get to work." Betsy pointed the zombies to each spot and told them to clean up all the rot.
"Damn woman!"
Holy Ghost Writer appeared out of nowhere and the last thing Betsy felt was something whiz into her hair. She had three nails from a nail gun shot into her head. Betsy toppled over dead. The zombies stopped cleaning, happy they were free and ate Betsy with glee. Some grabbed Holy Ghost Writer as well, who was just happy he sent Betsy first to Hell.
The zombies began to scatter as the one time blogger sanctuary no longer served up humans on a platter. The many bloggers had been picked off one by one. The place was nothing more than rotting leftover flesh under a hot sun.
****************************************
Dr. Zoggif threw his hands in the air while sitting in his lair. He watched as the screen read ninety nine percent of the world's bloggers were now dead. He figured soon he would be relaxing at a club med.
"For years they have taken from me, ignored me, made fun of me and caused my life to be like this. Now they have all paid. A few more to go and my work is complete. I will be rich."
Dr. Zoggif opened up some program on his computer screen. He laughed as it started to hack each and every blog scene. Then Google Ads from his account appeared on each and every one. After a few minutes he watched as his Google Adwords account jumped a ton.
"I will be the richest man in the world."
"Not if you hide in my basement all your life."
"Mom, mind your own business. Don't ruin my moment."
The pair shouted at each other through the door. Dr. Zoggif then just hit ignore. He was too busy watching his Google Adwords account rise and rise. It was gaining more money than Africa had flies. His plan was nearing the end, all he needed now was a few more bloggers to join in on the becoming zombie lunch trend. He waited with sheer delight, hoping that one hundred percent mark would soon be in sight.
*************************************
The evil ones are dead, sort of off with their head. I guess the bad guys do lose. You just have to light the fuse. Of course many went down with the ship. Gonna give the cat any lip? The cat will just give you some gas as he rhymes off his little rhyming ass.
Later all, have a nice fall.
Chapter 7
Pushing Up Flowers
Zombies With Powers
Drazin drove through each zombie he saw. He was glad there was no zombie road kill law. The rest of the group still tried to wrap their head around what Betsy had done. Drazin listened as their tale was spun.
"First she wanted to feed Drazin, then she was a half zombie freaky thing and now she feeds people to zombies. Does Drazin sense a trend there or what?"
Drazin smirked while the rest ignored him. They all felt their situation was grim. All their friends were now dead. All they really wanted was a nice comfy bed.
"I'm number one. I should be driving." Hank declared out of nowhere. He looked the other way as Drazin gave him an evil glare.
"Look out!" Brian yelled out and Drazin slammed on the brakes heeding his shout.
"Drazin can never catch a break."
"I want that." Alex grinned as a zombie with a guitar strapped to him, waved his huge arms like a tree limb.
"It's arms are bigger than its body." Mary curled up in the back, not wanting to face another zombie attack.
The super powered zombie waved its arms in the air and they seemed to send out a tune that would raise even a deaf person's neck hair. The group covered their ears while the zombie seemed to be looking for cheers.
"Drazin will put an end to this."
Drazin stepped on the gas, going for another zombie run over pass. But as soon as he got near the zombie brought his arms near. They caught the car between them and began to crush it. The group all started to have a fit.
"I'm number one. I told you I should drive."
Drazin smacked Hank upside his head. He was not about to lose to some super undead. The car continued to be crushed bit by bit and the roof Drazin started to hit. It was rising up from the crushing of the zombie and soon all the rest joined in on his spree. The roof popped off and all jumped free. Hank continued to shout he was number one with glee.
"I want that guitar." Alex declared, he felt to beat this zombie he was prepared.
"Drazin will leave it to you then. Have at it."
Alex grabbed a rock as the rest sat back and continued to gawk. He biffed it at the zombie's head. It got stuck there seeming to bring the zombie little dread.
"That was your big plan? Drazin could have done that."
"Maybe if we all do it at once."
"Drazin doesn't have time for this."
Drazin searched the ground and took a gun off the dead guy that he found. He checked to see if it had any ammo in it. He found that it had one shot left that it could spit. He shrugged and walked up in front of the group, ready to turn this zombie into mush like soup. He aimed at the zombie head and then to the car. Alex cried out, "No!" as Drazin blew up the zombie and its guitar.
"Now that takes care of that." Drazin dropped the gun and by shooting the gas tank he had impressed almost everyone.
"My..my...guitar." Alex fell to his knees and cried, forgetting about his pride.
"At least you have this, from number one."
Hank handed Alex a guitar string he had found on the ground. Alex stuck it in his pocket and joined the group. They continued walking, not knowing where to go, hoping no more zombies threw them for a loop.
****************************************
"Oh this will be the cream of the crop. We kill them and they count as bonus points." Theresa kept her hand on the button to her trap door as she was ready to kill some more.
"A little blood thirsty. I like it." Manzanita stopped playing with her herb collection upon Theresa's detection.
Truedessa, Pat and the cats were coming down the street. They were walking to their own beat. They all seemed as happy as can be, despite being in this over run zombie reality. Truedessa noticed the flower stand and thought it was grand. She wanted some and Cassie thought they looked better to eat than a plum.
"Get out of here cat." Theresa shooed Cassie away after she jumped up and tried to snack on their flower display.
"The cat can't take her anywhere. But they do have flowers to spare."
"I don't trust these wenches. Who sells flowers with such demons about?" Pat listened to the voices in his head and knew these two were going to cause them dread.
"They are only flowers, Pat." Truedessa ran up to the table and looked them over. To her flowers were as great as a fire hydrant was to rover.
Pat noticed Theresa's hand hidden away. He smiled while they told him how much he needed to pay.
"How much are they?"
"For you Truedessa, only....your life." Theresa cackled and pulled the lever. She and Manzanita thought they were clever.
"But....but....our streak." Manzanita looked less than thrilled as the pair and the cats were not billed.
Theresa and Manzantia just glared at the pair while Truedessa took a flower and placed it in her hair. They were standing on thin air. Theresa then began to swear. They would have them added to the streak. They were too busy yelling at the two to die to notice Orlin and Cassie ready to kick them in the butt cheek. Both cats stood ready to go. Pat nodded and yanked Truedessa to the side while the two cats sent Theresa and Manzanita below. They mule kicked them in the butt and their killing streak ending with them making the final cut.
"I guess all the flowers are now yours." Pat laughed as he hit the button and closed the trap door. He never knew Manzanita had such a loud roar.
"I think they are mine!" Cassie jumped up and began to chow down. She always loved eating flowers no matter the town.
"I deserve a few too. I'll eat the blue." Orlin jumped up and joined in, both happy they were able to win.
"So?" Pat raised his eyebrows to Truedessa and waited for it while glaring at the covering to the pit.
"You were right. The wenches were evil. But the flowers weren't."
"They will be when they come out of me and Cassie."
The cats finished up their snack while Truedessa gave Pat a playful whack. They noticed zombies off in the distance coming their way and knew it was no time for play. They all continued on their way, hoping soon to spot the towers that led home to their bay.
****************************************
Betsy limped along the street, having burns from her head to her feet. She was not sure how she survived the blast. But she knew her clean house was a thing of the past. She had seen signs a while back when gathering supplies for her shack. They said, "Blogger Sanctuary This Way," so she decided to follow them as she was in need a of a new bay.
She came to a gate and peered through. She caught a few people in view. She yelled the best she could, finding that she was misunderstood. They seemed to think she was a zombie. A familiar face came up to her ready to set her free.
"Eddie..." Betsy whispered, falling to her knees as she felt a cool breeze.
Eddie Bluelights opened the gate and yanked Betsy through, realizing her burnt to a crisp fate. He lugged her over to a bench and sat her down giving his fist a clench.
"I really hate zombies."
"Is that Betsy?" Gloria looked Betsy up and down. She was glad Betsy had made it to her town.
Gloria ran to tell the others they had a new recruit and that she looked like she had taken on a zombie brute. Gloria then went back to her kitchen she had set up. She poured some soup in to a cup. She glanced at all her dishes on the way out. Zombie head on a plate, zombie toes, zombie liver, were all enough to make any normal person shout. But she fried them up good and knew they had to eat at their new hood.
"Have some zombie soup to regain your strength."
Betsy spit the soup out when she heard the name. She thought Gloria was playing some game. The three then heard a big commotion at the gate. It seemed the town was in for a doomed fate.
Eddie helped Betsy to her feet and the three watched people scurry about the street. Mary Kirkland was running away with her rats. Al was gearing up some barbed wire bats. Betty took in the view from a bench. Stephanie Faris held up a huge wrench. Mama Zen had a chainsaw ready. Susan Gourley was writing her memoir quite steady. The group all seemed preparing for war or something more.
"What is going on?" Eddie yelled out, with most ignoring his shout.
"She has brought zombies upon us. A whole army of them. Damn, woman." Holy Ghost Writer screamed and ran, not wanting a zombie tan.
The gates began to shake and creak. Before long there was no more zombie hide and seek. They busted through the gate and hundreds of zombies came through at an alarming rate. They sniffed out everybody before long and the group of zombies were just too strong. The group had been taken down from dozens to what looked like just three. Gloria, Betsy and Eddie.
"There is nowhere to run." Gloria looked for a way to go. But zombies were at every exit high and low.
"I'll go down fighting." Eddie was ready as he held up a log good and steady.
Betsy smiled finding a second chance and hopped back while Gloria and Eddie took their stance. Zombies rushed them both and soon they were heading south, right into the zombies stomach cavity. the zombies then crowded around Betsy.
"We will clean this place up and call it home. Now that you have full stomachs, let's get to work." Betsy pointed the zombies to each spot and told them to clean up all the rot.
"Damn woman!"
Holy Ghost Writer appeared out of nowhere and the last thing Betsy felt was something whiz into her hair. She had three nails from a nail gun shot into her head. Betsy toppled over dead. The zombies stopped cleaning, happy they were free and ate Betsy with glee. Some grabbed Holy Ghost Writer as well, who was just happy he sent Betsy first to Hell.
The zombies began to scatter as the one time blogger sanctuary no longer served up humans on a platter. The many bloggers had been picked off one by one. The place was nothing more than rotting leftover flesh under a hot sun.
****************************************
Dr. Zoggif threw his hands in the air while sitting in his lair. He watched as the screen read ninety nine percent of the world's bloggers were now dead. He figured soon he would be relaxing at a club med.
"For years they have taken from me, ignored me, made fun of me and caused my life to be like this. Now they have all paid. A few more to go and my work is complete. I will be rich."
Dr. Zoggif opened up some program on his computer screen. He laughed as it started to hack each and every blog scene. Then Google Ads from his account appeared on each and every one. After a few minutes he watched as his Google Adwords account jumped a ton.
"I will be the richest man in the world."
"Not if you hide in my basement all your life."
"Mom, mind your own business. Don't ruin my moment."
The pair shouted at each other through the door. Dr. Zoggif then just hit ignore. He was too busy watching his Google Adwords account rise and rise. It was gaining more money than Africa had flies. His plan was nearing the end, all he needed now was a few more bloggers to join in on the becoming zombie lunch trend. He waited with sheer delight, hoping that one hundred percent mark would soon be in sight.
*************************************
The evil ones are dead, sort of off with their head. I guess the bad guys do lose. You just have to light the fuse. Of course many went down with the ship. Gonna give the cat any lip? The cat will just give you some gas as he rhymes off his little rhyming ass.
Later all, have a nice fall.
November 12, 2014
Round Twenty Eight Brings Some Hate!
And today Pat, not the cat, hmph to that, is over here. Go to IWSG for a peer.
The cat always seems to find the crazy hoard or they seem to find me when bored. At least I hope they are bored at their sea. Otherwise what sane person would type this crap with glee.
guy with big boobs
old people boobs
boobsgalore
Someone has boobs on the brain. Bet they were surprised when they found my lane.
booby fun nuts
And this one wants two for one. Maybe the first guy upped his fun.
pirates
Want to walk the plank? Maybe add to the two light hearted fools bank?
minging feet
Need a picture for that? I can haul out the zombie feet stat!
fat man eaten food
That is a given you know. Hope you found a fat eating show.
dirty ink blots
As opposed to what? Clean ones at your hut?
debi nova porno
Umm err nothing here. Might find some cat rear.
cats smell ass
See! I told you so. This guy was in the know.
i can see your thong thru your dress
And you just had to tell? I guess the sight wasn't swell?
is the ground rumbling and bubbling a sea maybe coming to the 74135 zip code
Damn, the mouthiest one ever. Who would type such an endeavor?
look at your feet poem
Look at your feet,
Aren't they neat?
They smell sweet,
For a rat treat.
rhymetimelatenight
I am the same early or late. Sorry, no hard R ratings at my gate.
online reputation management akado
Looking for the ninja wannabe to teach you to fight at your sea?
oh you're hungry cooked up some ass for you
That poor donkey will haunt you for ass eating at your zoo.
And the winner of today sure likes to play. I guess they really don't know when to quit. That is easy to tell by their below fit.
I had 18 but it didt land on 18 and I won ass all
I take it gambling did not pay off for the above. At least they got some ass love. If hungry they can give the above their fill. Now that just makes the cat ill. So I will just go pass some gas out my little rhyming ass.
Later all, have a nice fall.
The cat always seems to find the crazy hoard or they seem to find me when bored. At least I hope they are bored at their sea. Otherwise what sane person would type this crap with glee.
guy with big boobs
old people boobs
boobsgalore
Someone has boobs on the brain. Bet they were surprised when they found my lane.
booby fun nuts
And this one wants two for one. Maybe the first guy upped his fun.
pirates
Want to walk the plank? Maybe add to the two light hearted fools bank?
minging feet
Need a picture for that? I can haul out the zombie feet stat!
fat man eaten food
That is a given you know. Hope you found a fat eating show.
dirty ink blots
As opposed to what? Clean ones at your hut?
debi nova porno
Umm err nothing here. Might find some cat rear.
cats smell ass
See! I told you so. This guy was in the know.
i can see your thong thru your dress
And you just had to tell? I guess the sight wasn't swell?
is the ground rumbling and bubbling a sea maybe coming to the 74135 zip code
Damn, the mouthiest one ever. Who would type such an endeavor?
look at your feet poem
Look at your feet,
Aren't they neat?
They smell sweet,
For a rat treat.
rhymetimelatenight
I am the same early or late. Sorry, no hard R ratings at my gate.
online reputation management akado
Looking for the ninja wannabe to teach you to fight at your sea?
oh you're hungry cooked up some ass for you
That poor donkey will haunt you for ass eating at your zoo.
And the winner of today sure likes to play. I guess they really don't know when to quit. That is easy to tell by their below fit.
I had 18 but it didt land on 18 and I won ass all
I take it gambling did not pay off for the above. At least they got some ass love. If hungry they can give the above their fill. Now that just makes the cat ill. So I will just go pass some gas out my little rhyming ass.
Later all, have a nice fall.
November 11, 2014
Another Fake In Which To Partake!
The cat got some really great inside scoop at his sea. I just have to be nice and share it all with thee. I swear it is all real. I just have to say it is fake so I don't nullify any deal.
There is no need to ask,
First on task,
Gremlin VS Critters is coming.
The buzz is already drumming.
Next you will see,
Something more freaky.
A female James Bond,
Beyonce is first and Lohan is beyond.
If you aren't in heaven,
With your new 007,
The get ready for this bliss,
Iron Man and Plastic Man will rip the piss.
Yep, they will make a movie,
That all will find so groovy.
They will just sit and talk,
As away you gawk.
Next is Homeward Bound 3.
It will be something to see.
It stars little old me.
I go out on a spree.
Next is a fun one,
You'll see it a ton.
Bill Murray on ice,
You'll pay full price.
Indiana Jones 5 is on its way.
But you will skip its display.
So they are calling it 6.
Those damn studio tricks.
Batman clones will hit screens soon.
All the Batman's will square off at high noon.
Clooney and his bat nipple suit,
Will be the first to get tossed in the garbage chute.
In the next planet of the apes,
Humans won't even dawn capes.
No humans actors will be there,
Apes will play humans by the pair.
And the best for last,
A real blast from the past.
My Pet Monster gets a remake.
I know, so astonishing you do a double take.
Now you are in the know, all thanks to my show. Ready to hop in line? Isn't all that news just divine? The cat has given you an all access pass. No need to thank my little rhyming ass.
Later all, have a nice fall.
There is no need to ask,
First on task,
Gremlin VS Critters is coming.
The buzz is already drumming.
Next you will see,
Something more freaky.
A female James Bond,
Beyonce is first and Lohan is beyond.
If you aren't in heaven,
With your new 007,
The get ready for this bliss,
Iron Man and Plastic Man will rip the piss.
Yep, they will make a movie,
That all will find so groovy.
They will just sit and talk,
As away you gawk.
Next is Homeward Bound 3.
It will be something to see.
It stars little old me.
I go out on a spree.
Next is a fun one,
You'll see it a ton.
Bill Murray on ice,
You'll pay full price.
Indiana Jones 5 is on its way.
But you will skip its display.
So they are calling it 6.
Those damn studio tricks.
Batman clones will hit screens soon.
All the Batman's will square off at high noon.
Clooney and his bat nipple suit,
Will be the first to get tossed in the garbage chute.
In the next planet of the apes,
Humans won't even dawn capes.
No humans actors will be there,
Apes will play humans by the pair.
And the best for last,
A real blast from the past.
My Pet Monster gets a remake.
I know, so astonishing you do a double take.
Now you are in the know, all thanks to my show. Ready to hop in line? Isn't all that news just divine? The cat has given you an all access pass. No need to thank my little rhyming ass.
Later all, have a nice fall.
November 10, 2014
Special Guest Two Just For You!
Pat is here today with a review on display!
Well it seems there is hate for the cat, who would have guessed that? Or a challenger I suppose. Maybe he is just mad his head got stuck in a hose? I mean look at that hairdo, maybe Brian would be the only one to like its view.
The cat is grand,
To many across the land.
Except one or two,
Who come to view.
Some hate here and there,
Come once in a while to my lair.
But this is the first,
That it came as video burst.
This guest is just rather rude.
He gives lots of attitude.
I'll have to hire the ninja wannabe,
To take him out at my sea.
Wait! He's in the litter box.
Maybe I will just pelt him with rocks.
His sword can't stop them all.
Then he'll give a cheery cat call.
Maybe get that sword,
And give him an award.
Like a hair cut.
Enjoy the hate at my hut.
Now the cat makes fun of himself too. He will go anywhere at his zoo. Does that take the sting of being murdered by a clown away? No? Oh well, I guess the cat has hell to pay. I wonder if Optimistic figured that clown's question out yet? Wait! Don't tell this pet. Samurai wannabes are just crass. I will have to pelt him with what comes out my little rhyming ass.
Later all, have a nice fall.
Well it seems there is hate for the cat, who would have guessed that? Or a challenger I suppose. Maybe he is just mad his head got stuck in a hose? I mean look at that hairdo, maybe Brian would be the only one to like its view.
The cat is grand,
To many across the land.
Except one or two,
Who come to view.
Some hate here and there,
Come once in a while to my lair.
But this is the first,
That it came as video burst.
This guest is just rather rude.
He gives lots of attitude.
I'll have to hire the ninja wannabe,
To take him out at my sea.
Wait! He's in the litter box.
Maybe I will just pelt him with rocks.
His sword can't stop them all.
Then he'll give a cheery cat call.
Maybe get that sword,
And give him an award.
Like a hair cut.
Enjoy the hate at my hut.
Now the cat makes fun of himself too. He will go anywhere at his zoo. Does that take the sting of being murdered by a clown away? No? Oh well, I guess the cat has hell to pay. I wonder if Optimistic figured that clown's question out yet? Wait! Don't tell this pet. Samurai wannabes are just crass. I will have to pelt him with what comes out my little rhyming ass.
Later all, have a nice fall.
November 9, 2014
Imagine That With The Cat!
So the cat had an idea for a ditty at his sea as Pat went all non rhyming with that latest novel added to our book tree. You know Max Blizzard and The Gem of Camelot. Seems to be a hit more than not. Anyway, this is what came due. Not as sure on it as others though at my zoo.
Along comes a problem,
Stumped you grump and growl.
Stuck, sinking in the mud.
Left alone crying foul.
What can you do?
Can't find a resolution.
Things are out of control.
How about a new solution.
Squash that problem like a gnat.
Use that given imagination,
And you're free, imagine that,
Use that given imagination and imagine that.
Trapped in the ever spinning world.
Can't break free from strife,
Too much routine on your mind,
Left bogged down from life.
Passengers on the bus of fate.
Drivers taking you for a spin.
Trapped with no exit or end.
So here's what you do to win.
Squash that problem like a gnat.
Use that given imagination.
And you win life back, imagine that.
Use that given imagination and imagine that.
You can't hope to win,
Following the set rules.
To beat the stacking odds,
You have all the tools.
Imagine that!
You can change life,
Just imagine that,
You free from strife.
Let your imagination fly free.
New roads will come up to bat.
Don't be a stick sinking in the mud,
And let your imagination just imagine that.
So what do you think? A good missing link? Bring you to the brink? Another anyway I add to my rink. Hey, a little extra promo isn't bad. So I figured I'd shove it up on Youtube at my pad. So use that imagination class and imagine along with my little rhyming ass.
Later all, have a nice fall.
Along comes a problem,
Stumped you grump and growl.
Stuck, sinking in the mud.
Left alone crying foul.
What can you do?
Can't find a resolution.
Things are out of control.
How about a new solution.
Squash that problem like a gnat.
Use that given imagination,
And you're free, imagine that,
Use that given imagination and imagine that.
Trapped in the ever spinning world.
Can't break free from strife,
Too much routine on your mind,
Left bogged down from life.
Passengers on the bus of fate.
Drivers taking you for a spin.
Trapped with no exit or end.
So here's what you do to win.
Squash that problem like a gnat.
Use that given imagination.
And you win life back, imagine that.
Use that given imagination and imagine that.
You can't hope to win,
Following the set rules.
To beat the stacking odds,
You have all the tools.
Imagine that!
You can change life,
Just imagine that,
You free from strife.
Let your imagination fly free.
New roads will come up to bat.
Don't be a stick sinking in the mud,
And let your imagination just imagine that.
So what do you think? A good missing link? Bring you to the brink? Another anyway I add to my rink. Hey, a little extra promo isn't bad. So I figured I'd shove it up on Youtube at my pad. So use that imagination class and imagine along with my little rhyming ass.
Later all, have a nice fall.
November 8, 2014
Brain Rot Been Caught?
Today Pat is Here click for a peer!
The cat skipped it last year but now it is all you damn well hear. There are friggin signs on signs hanging around. There are too many to even pee on for a hound, which is what they are worth. The Flu Shot spreads its filth across the Earth.
A sign at every place.
The flu shot you should embrace.
A sign on every door.
Listen to our lore.
The "safest" way to prevent the flu.
Forget hand washing at your zoo.
It is just oh so safe for one and all.
Believe the writing on the wall.
If you're pregnant, get it now.
Even give it to your pet cow.
If you're young or elderly get it today.
Continue to listen to what we say.
Pffffffffft stick it up your ass.
Is what I say to them in mass.
I've said it right to their flu shot pushing face.
And I'll say it again at a steady pace.
It has been tested out and about.
Half got a placebo, half got the crap they shout.
There was no difference in numbers at all!
Same amount in each case got the flu at their hall.
It is the biggest placebo going itself.
Just as magical as a Santa elf.
Oh you won't get the flu with it,
But if you do it won't be as bad a hit.
Pfffffft that is like saying a little crap has a different smell,
Compared to large crap where you dwell.
Crap is the best comparison for it
For it is completely full of shit.
The mercury in them alone will screw you.
You are MUCH better off catching the flu.
That will go away in a week or so,
Where as the mercury can bleep you up forever at your show.
Take them if you are sick?
Pffffft hit whoever said that with a brick.
Your body is already fighting junk off,
Add mercury to it and it will further scoff.
Safe is the biggest shame of all.
Safer to lick the litterbox at your hall.
And just one final thing from me to you,
There has been no increase in death rates from the flu.
That is right. No increase in death rates from before the flu shot and now with the flu shot on our Earthly site. So what does it do? Gives you piece of mind so you are lazy, don't wash your hands and catch the flu. But ohhhhh it won't be as bad. Pffffft right! And I live in King Tut's pad. Don't be sheep and look things up, from multiple places, when it comes to such crap. It can give you worse things than the big dirt nap. Flu shot pusher advice is worth less then that of a singing bass. That is just the opinion of my little rhyming ass.
Later all, have a nice fall.
The cat skipped it last year but now it is all you damn well hear. There are friggin signs on signs hanging around. There are too many to even pee on for a hound, which is what they are worth. The Flu Shot spreads its filth across the Earth.
A sign at every place.
The flu shot you should embrace.
A sign on every door.
Listen to our lore.
The "safest" way to prevent the flu.
Forget hand washing at your zoo.
It is just oh so safe for one and all.
Believe the writing on the wall.
If you're pregnant, get it now.
Even give it to your pet cow.
If you're young or elderly get it today.
Continue to listen to what we say.
Pffffffffft stick it up your ass.
Is what I say to them in mass.
I've said it right to their flu shot pushing face.
And I'll say it again at a steady pace.
It has been tested out and about.
Half got a placebo, half got the crap they shout.
There was no difference in numbers at all!
Same amount in each case got the flu at their hall.
It is the biggest placebo going itself.
Just as magical as a Santa elf.
Oh you won't get the flu with it,
But if you do it won't be as bad a hit.
Pfffffft that is like saying a little crap has a different smell,
Compared to large crap where you dwell.
Crap is the best comparison for it
For it is completely full of shit.
The mercury in them alone will screw you.
You are MUCH better off catching the flu.
That will go away in a week or so,
Where as the mercury can bleep you up forever at your show.
Take them if you are sick?
Pffffft hit whoever said that with a brick.
Your body is already fighting junk off,
Add mercury to it and it will further scoff.
Safe is the biggest shame of all.
Safer to lick the litterbox at your hall.
And just one final thing from me to you,
There has been no increase in death rates from the flu.
That is right. No increase in death rates from before the flu shot and now with the flu shot on our Earthly site. So what does it do? Gives you piece of mind so you are lazy, don't wash your hands and catch the flu. But ohhhhh it won't be as bad. Pffffft right! And I live in King Tut's pad. Don't be sheep and look things up, from multiple places, when it comes to such crap. It can give you worse things than the big dirt nap. Flu shot pusher advice is worth less then that of a singing bass. That is just the opinion of my little rhyming ass.
Later all, have a nice fall.
November 7, 2014
At What Age Do You Disengage?
So the cat was getting low on food and Pat did not want me giving him attitude. He went out one night around dusk and got some. I guess he was a happening chum. He go cat calls from two drunk cougars outside the pet shop. Thankfully he did not chat or stop. But they were old as their calls took hold. Well older than him, way more than a whim.
So how old do you go?
Maybe it's how low?
All about the money?
Only way you call an old fart, honey?
40-50 they were at least.
Sure would have scared this rhyming beast.
10-20 years older or more?
Ummm pffft to that at my shore.
6 years either way,
Is the limit at my bay.
Rather not be close to diapers or jail bait.
That is not a fun fate.
But to each their own.
Moan and groan at the tone.
Want to be a dirty old man?
If rich, you may have a fan.
Or a cougar could bite you.
Some may like it to come due.
The cat needs no more cats though,
Just so you all know.
Not as bad as the old fart across the way,
Will never live down that day.
So at least anything else is up.
Rather get leg humped by a pup.
Age may just be a number at play,
But the bigger the display,
The closer your odds of some ground,
On top of you being found.
So a number it may be,
But have to be close to me,
Or screw that I say.
Sorry, not literally, no gutter play.
Closer in age to ones mother,
Is another reason not to smother.
Don't even want to go there.
Good thing there is no rhyme to spare.
All about the love?
Like destined from above?
So how old do you go?
Maybe it's how low?
So there was a super dirty old man and two cougars who need to get a pet shop ban. Damn, Pat is sure racking things up at his sea. So how old is too old for thee? Think Pat should have went with the 50 year old? Hey, she could have a lot of gold. Yeah, still no way hosa. The cat says stick with own age at our bay. Ever have a cat call there lad or lass? It did not impress my little rhyming ass.
Later all, have a nice fall.
So how old do you go?
Maybe it's how low?
All about the money?
Only way you call an old fart, honey?
40-50 they were at least.
Sure would have scared this rhyming beast.
10-20 years older or more?
Ummm pffft to that at my shore.
6 years either way,
Is the limit at my bay.
Rather not be close to diapers or jail bait.
That is not a fun fate.
But to each their own.
Moan and groan at the tone.
Want to be a dirty old man?
If rich, you may have a fan.
Or a cougar could bite you.
Some may like it to come due.
The cat needs no more cats though,
Just so you all know.
Not as bad as the old fart across the way,
Will never live down that day.
So at least anything else is up.
Rather get leg humped by a pup.
Age may just be a number at play,
But the bigger the display,
The closer your odds of some ground,
On top of you being found.
So a number it may be,
But have to be close to me,
Or screw that I say.
Sorry, not literally, no gutter play.
Closer in age to ones mother,
Is another reason not to smother.
Don't even want to go there.
Good thing there is no rhyme to spare.
All about the love?
Like destined from above?
So how old do you go?
Maybe it's how low?
So there was a super dirty old man and two cougars who need to get a pet shop ban. Damn, Pat is sure racking things up at his sea. So how old is too old for thee? Think Pat should have went with the 50 year old? Hey, she could have a lot of gold. Yeah, still no way hosa. The cat says stick with own age at our bay. Ever have a cat call there lad or lass? It did not impress my little rhyming ass.
Later all, have a nice fall.
November 6, 2014
Blogvengers Part Six, The Group Takes Their Licks!
Chapter 6
Show You Ours
Zombies With Powers
Mary and the dVerse crew awoke to the dawning of the day, as the sun shined straight into Betsy's bay. She spied Alex in some ninja wannabe stance. He was giving the zombies an evil glance. Hank was declaring he was number one. Neither trusting Betsy's zombies as they enjoyed the sun.
"Hank, where is Brian?"
"He went some way. But he is still number two today!" Hank gave a number one cheer and even slapped his own rear.
"That guitar killer must have got eaten by zombies. Ouch! I was just kidding." Alex rubbed his arm after Mary threw a book at him and caused him harm.
"I'll sniff him out."
"She's been hanging around those dogs of hers too much."
Mary went into the kitchen to find Betsy cooking up a storm, she knew this was just the norm. She heard muffled cries and then Betsy's face turned from happy to that of crazy eyes.
"Betsy has kidnapped Brian." Mary yelled while Betsy tried to whack her with a spoon, realizing Betsy had sure gone wacko at her sand dune.
"Chow time, boys. Come and get it." Betsy waved her arm and smiled as in the house her zombie staff piled.
"I'm still number one. Number one at getting out of here." Hank jumped through the window and ran into the street. He was not about to become a treat.
"I'm okay with number two."
Alex followed suit and just made it out, avoiding a zombie brute. The rest of the dVerse crew tried to follow but on them all the zombies began to chew and swallow. Screams echoed throughout Betsy's house while she just smiled being as quiet as a mouse.
Mary avoided the zombies and made her way down the hall. She noticed the locked door and heard Brian's muffled call.
"Looking for this?" Betsy held up the door key and then tossed it to Mary. "Go ahead, you are all doomed anyway. At least they will be good and fed to clean this mess up."
Mary unlocked the door and ran down the stairs as above her zombies ate her friends in pairs. She ungagged Brian and loosened the ropes holding his hands together. Neither had any idea how this attack they were going to weather.
"I hope you don't have that trait of your so called twin."
"Not wearing any underwear and crazy zombie hoarder are two things we don't have in common." Brian gawked the room, trying to find a way out of this doom.
"She did that to him?" Mary pointed to Silver Fox who was still gagged with socks.
Brian yanked the sock from his mouth and he slightly moved his head to the south. Mary moved some boxes aside and found a spot Betsy was trying to hide. Brian used Mary's key and unlocked Silver Fox's chains. But he said he had had enough of life's pains. He signaled for Brian to give him a gun and then whispered for him to run.
Betsy came down the stairs ready to gloat. Stair by stair she laughed louder, hitting a high note. She gasped as she saw no legs Silver Fox lying on the floor. He used what little strength he had to ensure there would be no more.
"Sorry about this, doll."
"No! My nice clean house."
Silver Fox fired two shots into some propane tanks sitting nearby and within seconds everything in the house began to fry. The zombies, the dead, Betsy and her clean home all blew up like it was the fourth of July at the Superdome.
"Well at least there are less people to stop me from being number one." Hank said under his breath, trying to make light of all the death.
The four remaining survivors watched Betsy's property burn and then heard a car come around the turn. It parked in front of them and they were ready to fight, until the sun reflected off a bald head and gold armor ever so bright.
"Looks like Drazin missed all the fun. So what has Drazin here? A Gawker, who Drazin hopes is through with his island stint, A ninja wannabe, who Drazin hopes doesn't get naked and send clones after Drazin this time and you two? Drazin doesn't know you two."
"But I'm number one!" Hank pouted and stomped his feet, as they group heard more zombies coming down the street.
"Well are you coming with Drazin or what? Drazin doesn't have all day."
Drazin got back in the car and the four were not behind by far. He then sped off down the road, still hoping like the other realities he had been sent too, that these four did not go all crazy mode.
****************************************
Truedessa and Pat had found a tree and rested below it going on an eating spree. The cats licked up the food they were given too. Pat still seemed not to have a clue.
"That demon has left us to perish. I will call upon Merlin to bring Excalibur so I can smite him."
"Pat is off his rocker. Of course that is not a shocker."
Truedessa flicked dirt at his face and his OCD tendencies he began to embrace. Pat came back to reality quite quick. In that moment everything seemed to click.
"The voices in my head can't trump my OCD."
"Dirt, tell me about it!" Cassie licked herself clean, rolling her eyes and hating the dirty zombie scene.
"What's a little dirt between friends." Truedessa's smile turned to dread as some sort of radar went off in her head.
"I know that look. Now what?"
The group looked around for danger and then noticed an oncoming strange. He had a big hat and was rather fat. His face even looked like that of a rat.
"You think he is a pet of Mary Kirkland's? She must have one big cage." Pat laughed at the guy and he soon learned all was a lie.
"What is that? He is no longer fat. Hell, he is no longer a he. Now he is a she."
"Great! A shape shifting zombie. What next?"
Orlin and Cassie scurried up the tree, looking for some sort of safety. Pat and Truedessa prepared for a fight, the voices in Pat's head once again took flight.
"Avast yee land lubber."
"Pat there is no boat, choose a voice of note." The cat yelled from up in the tree, trying to hide himself behind Cassie.
The zombie kept slowly moving forward toward the pair. It then turned into a lion with tye dye hair. It did not seem to be able to control its power. Truedessa then let loose some magic and down came a crystal shower.
The zombie was quickly turned to mush, as crystals were even lodged in its tush. But before the group could cheer and release their fear, it began to take form again. This time it turned into three men.
"It's like that Greek dragon thing. Hey, I watched Disney's Hercules too at my wing."
Truedessa and Pat knew the cat was right and they had to change the tactics of the fight. Pat stuck his finger out like a gun and watched as each of the three men turned into a nun.
"Again with the nuns. Pat, we are really going to Hell." Cassie chimed in, still not sure on how they would win.
"Don't worry buckaroo, this super powered zombie is through."
Pat pulled back his finger and let it linger. He shot it off like rounds from a gun. But unlike Gawker Island, out came not a single one. Truedessa placed her hand on his shoulder and his finger started to smolder. He shot and energy flew from it, with each nun taking a hit. They remained on the ground and Pat grabbed a stick, he rammed it through all three wobbly zombies and hoped it did the trick. They then became as one once more and he waved his arm for Truedessa to explore.
"You are going to owe me for this one, a lot."
"Thy, but my OCD says it has to be thee."
Pat was his normal self for a second or two, pretending a voice was still coming due. He knew what they had to do was rather eww and it was something he would never want to do. The zombie turned into a giant thing that looked like an overgrown Critter and it seemed rather bitter.
"Here goes nothing." Truedessa let go of Pat's shoulder and ran across the land like an incoming boulder.
"Yuck but good luck."
"I have to lick myself just watching this."
Pat smirked knowing all would be fine as he listened to the comments of each feline. He watched Truedessa jump right into the mouth of the thing and then its body began to sing. it was vibrating from head to toe and before long it started to glow. Seconds later it burst into nothing at all, leaving Truedessa covered in zombie goo while the cats gave her a cat call.
"Pffft, zombies with powers have nothing on your powers." Pat laughed and ran the other way, as Truedessa tried to give him a zombie goo hug after he had his say.
"I think it is safer if we stay in the tree. I don't want that goo on me."
The two cats watched one while Truedessa and Pat ran across the green lawn. Pat trying not to get caught as many of his voices seemed to agree the idea was not very hot.
****************************************
Dr. Zoggif ignored the rants from his mother, wishing she would go bother some other. He watched his screen reach ninety five percent and he knew only a few dozen bloggers in the world were left to repent.
"Pizza is here, you better pay for it because I am not going to."
Dr. Zoggif muttered to himself as he grabbed some cash and to the front door he was in a dash.
"This pizza is cold."
"Well warm it up." The driver waved and walked off while Dr. Zoggif continued to scoff.
"Next on my list to rid the world of, pizza delivery men."
Dr. Zoggif took his pizza back to his lab in the basement and saw his mother poking around his machines vent.
"Mom, don't touch that. What did I say about touching my experiments. Get out!"
"If you could ever get one to work, you could actually get paid."
Dr. Zoggif pushed his mother out the door and locked it behind him as his machine gave a roar. He ran over and checked it over as fast as he could and noticed a gear had come loose that his mother had not understood.
"Damn it! Pain in the ass mother."
Dr. Zoggif fixed it as fast as he could not wanting to let the remaining bloggers break free and get back home to their hood.
****************************************
"Truedessa , did you feel that?"
The group stood still as they felt a little chill. It was like there was some kind of shift, however swift. Truedessa and Pat then each caught a glimpse of a few towers and they now had a destination that would rid them of this world and zombies with powers.
"Where are we going? Did you two have a showing?"
"Let's get our Lord of the Rings on."
The group honed in on the towers while Truedessa dreamed of hot showers. She still was picking off the zombie goo, disgusted over what had come due. The cats thought she smelled and steered clear while Pat avoided the goo she threw out of fear. They knew the towers were guarded with tons of zombie might but the group was not afraid as long as they were together in the fight.
*******************************
I guess now they all know where to go, so no more searching high and low. But what will get in their way? I guess we will find out next time at my bay. Are you rhymed out yet class? It still doesn't matter to my little rhyming ass.
Later all, have a nice fall.
Show You Ours
Zombies With Powers
Mary and the dVerse crew awoke to the dawning of the day, as the sun shined straight into Betsy's bay. She spied Alex in some ninja wannabe stance. He was giving the zombies an evil glance. Hank was declaring he was number one. Neither trusting Betsy's zombies as they enjoyed the sun.
"Hank, where is Brian?"
"He went some way. But he is still number two today!" Hank gave a number one cheer and even slapped his own rear.
"That guitar killer must have got eaten by zombies. Ouch! I was just kidding." Alex rubbed his arm after Mary threw a book at him and caused him harm.
"I'll sniff him out."
"She's been hanging around those dogs of hers too much."
Mary went into the kitchen to find Betsy cooking up a storm, she knew this was just the norm. She heard muffled cries and then Betsy's face turned from happy to that of crazy eyes.
"Betsy has kidnapped Brian." Mary yelled while Betsy tried to whack her with a spoon, realizing Betsy had sure gone wacko at her sand dune.
"Chow time, boys. Come and get it." Betsy waved her arm and smiled as in the house her zombie staff piled.
"I'm still number one. Number one at getting out of here." Hank jumped through the window and ran into the street. He was not about to become a treat.
"I'm okay with number two."
Alex followed suit and just made it out, avoiding a zombie brute. The rest of the dVerse crew tried to follow but on them all the zombies began to chew and swallow. Screams echoed throughout Betsy's house while she just smiled being as quiet as a mouse.
Mary avoided the zombies and made her way down the hall. She noticed the locked door and heard Brian's muffled call.
"Looking for this?" Betsy held up the door key and then tossed it to Mary. "Go ahead, you are all doomed anyway. At least they will be good and fed to clean this mess up."
Mary unlocked the door and ran down the stairs as above her zombies ate her friends in pairs. She ungagged Brian and loosened the ropes holding his hands together. Neither had any idea how this attack they were going to weather.
"I hope you don't have that trait of your so called twin."
"Not wearing any underwear and crazy zombie hoarder are two things we don't have in common." Brian gawked the room, trying to find a way out of this doom.
"She did that to him?" Mary pointed to Silver Fox who was still gagged with socks.
Brian yanked the sock from his mouth and he slightly moved his head to the south. Mary moved some boxes aside and found a spot Betsy was trying to hide. Brian used Mary's key and unlocked Silver Fox's chains. But he said he had had enough of life's pains. He signaled for Brian to give him a gun and then whispered for him to run.
Betsy came down the stairs ready to gloat. Stair by stair she laughed louder, hitting a high note. She gasped as she saw no legs Silver Fox lying on the floor. He used what little strength he had to ensure there would be no more.
"Sorry about this, doll."
"No! My nice clean house."
Silver Fox fired two shots into some propane tanks sitting nearby and within seconds everything in the house began to fry. The zombies, the dead, Betsy and her clean home all blew up like it was the fourth of July at the Superdome.
"Well at least there are less people to stop me from being number one." Hank said under his breath, trying to make light of all the death.
The four remaining survivors watched Betsy's property burn and then heard a car come around the turn. It parked in front of them and they were ready to fight, until the sun reflected off a bald head and gold armor ever so bright.
"Looks like Drazin missed all the fun. So what has Drazin here? A Gawker, who Drazin hopes is through with his island stint, A ninja wannabe, who Drazin hopes doesn't get naked and send clones after Drazin this time and you two? Drazin doesn't know you two."
"But I'm number one!" Hank pouted and stomped his feet, as they group heard more zombies coming down the street.
"Well are you coming with Drazin or what? Drazin doesn't have all day."
Drazin got back in the car and the four were not behind by far. He then sped off down the road, still hoping like the other realities he had been sent too, that these four did not go all crazy mode.
****************************************
Truedessa and Pat had found a tree and rested below it going on an eating spree. The cats licked up the food they were given too. Pat still seemed not to have a clue.
"That demon has left us to perish. I will call upon Merlin to bring Excalibur so I can smite him."
"Pat is off his rocker. Of course that is not a shocker."
Truedessa flicked dirt at his face and his OCD tendencies he began to embrace. Pat came back to reality quite quick. In that moment everything seemed to click.
"The voices in my head can't trump my OCD."
"Dirt, tell me about it!" Cassie licked herself clean, rolling her eyes and hating the dirty zombie scene.
"What's a little dirt between friends." Truedessa's smile turned to dread as some sort of radar went off in her head.
"I know that look. Now what?"
The group looked around for danger and then noticed an oncoming strange. He had a big hat and was rather fat. His face even looked like that of a rat.
"You think he is a pet of Mary Kirkland's? She must have one big cage." Pat laughed at the guy and he soon learned all was a lie.
"What is that? He is no longer fat. Hell, he is no longer a he. Now he is a she."
"Great! A shape shifting zombie. What next?"
Orlin and Cassie scurried up the tree, looking for some sort of safety. Pat and Truedessa prepared for a fight, the voices in Pat's head once again took flight.
"Avast yee land lubber."
"Pat there is no boat, choose a voice of note." The cat yelled from up in the tree, trying to hide himself behind Cassie.
The zombie kept slowly moving forward toward the pair. It then turned into a lion with tye dye hair. It did not seem to be able to control its power. Truedessa then let loose some magic and down came a crystal shower.
The zombie was quickly turned to mush, as crystals were even lodged in its tush. But before the group could cheer and release their fear, it began to take form again. This time it turned into three men.
"It's like that Greek dragon thing. Hey, I watched Disney's Hercules too at my wing."
Truedessa and Pat knew the cat was right and they had to change the tactics of the fight. Pat stuck his finger out like a gun and watched as each of the three men turned into a nun.
"Again with the nuns. Pat, we are really going to Hell." Cassie chimed in, still not sure on how they would win.
"Don't worry buckaroo, this super powered zombie is through."
Pat pulled back his finger and let it linger. He shot it off like rounds from a gun. But unlike Gawker Island, out came not a single one. Truedessa placed her hand on his shoulder and his finger started to smolder. He shot and energy flew from it, with each nun taking a hit. They remained on the ground and Pat grabbed a stick, he rammed it through all three wobbly zombies and hoped it did the trick. They then became as one once more and he waved his arm for Truedessa to explore.
"You are going to owe me for this one, a lot."
"Thy, but my OCD says it has to be thee."
Pat was his normal self for a second or two, pretending a voice was still coming due. He knew what they had to do was rather eww and it was something he would never want to do. The zombie turned into a giant thing that looked like an overgrown Critter and it seemed rather bitter.
"Here goes nothing." Truedessa let go of Pat's shoulder and ran across the land like an incoming boulder.
"Yuck but good luck."
"I have to lick myself just watching this."
Pat smirked knowing all would be fine as he listened to the comments of each feline. He watched Truedessa jump right into the mouth of the thing and then its body began to sing. it was vibrating from head to toe and before long it started to glow. Seconds later it burst into nothing at all, leaving Truedessa covered in zombie goo while the cats gave her a cat call.
"Pffft, zombies with powers have nothing on your powers." Pat laughed and ran the other way, as Truedessa tried to give him a zombie goo hug after he had his say.
"I think it is safer if we stay in the tree. I don't want that goo on me."
The two cats watched one while Truedessa and Pat ran across the green lawn. Pat trying not to get caught as many of his voices seemed to agree the idea was not very hot.
****************************************
Dr. Zoggif ignored the rants from his mother, wishing she would go bother some other. He watched his screen reach ninety five percent and he knew only a few dozen bloggers in the world were left to repent.
"Pizza is here, you better pay for it because I am not going to."
Dr. Zoggif muttered to himself as he grabbed some cash and to the front door he was in a dash.
"This pizza is cold."
"Well warm it up." The driver waved and walked off while Dr. Zoggif continued to scoff.
"Next on my list to rid the world of, pizza delivery men."
Dr. Zoggif took his pizza back to his lab in the basement and saw his mother poking around his machines vent.
"Mom, don't touch that. What did I say about touching my experiments. Get out!"
"If you could ever get one to work, you could actually get paid."
Dr. Zoggif pushed his mother out the door and locked it behind him as his machine gave a roar. He ran over and checked it over as fast as he could and noticed a gear had come loose that his mother had not understood.
"Damn it! Pain in the ass mother."
Dr. Zoggif fixed it as fast as he could not wanting to let the remaining bloggers break free and get back home to their hood.
****************************************
"Truedessa , did you feel that?"
The group stood still as they felt a little chill. It was like there was some kind of shift, however swift. Truedessa and Pat then each caught a glimpse of a few towers and they now had a destination that would rid them of this world and zombies with powers.
"Where are we going? Did you two have a showing?"
"Let's get our Lord of the Rings on."
The group honed in on the towers while Truedessa dreamed of hot showers. She still was picking off the zombie goo, disgusted over what had come due. The cats thought she smelled and steered clear while Pat avoided the goo she threw out of fear. They knew the towers were guarded with tons of zombie might but the group was not afraid as long as they were together in the fight.
*******************************
I guess now they all know where to go, so no more searching high and low. But what will get in their way? I guess we will find out next time at my bay. Are you rhymed out yet class? It still doesn't matter to my little rhyming ass.
Later all, have a nice fall.
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