Hemant Pandey's Blog: Hemant pandey blog, page 117
September 20, 2017
Which is/are your favourite Quora answer(s) with less than 1k upvotes?
There are countless. Few links are shared here.
What are the harsh life lessons everyone should learn in their 20s?
What is the most dangerous thing people do in their everyday lives?
What are some money saving tips?
Which is the one habit that can transform your world forever?
What do people want most in life?
What is a girl’s biggest turn off?
What is your best way to kill the laziness?
100s more whom I love more than my popular answers.
211 Views · 1 Upvote
via Which is/are your favourite Quora answer(s) with less than 1k upvotes?
What is one thing about life or philosophy that you wish more people knew about or truly understood?
Life is a complicated fabric. Why?
The greatest misery of life is our false ‘ego’ or self. Let me explain in the context of love and relationships.
Suppose a good looking guy meets a decent girl at Airport. They sort of start liking each other (Happens many times). Guy thinks let me approach her to get her name , number etc. But wait. Now ego (conscious mind) enters the simple conversation and make sit complicated.
Male mind
Why should you approach ?
She may not like you?
She might have a boy friend ?
You must think about a proper pick up line or canned opener ?
You must not approach her with a flower, she may under value you.
She is beyond/below your league.
She is not your type.
She will shun you away.
Female counter part
He looks dude. Must be a flirt.
Let him make the first move. I am not a slut.
He might have several girl friends.
He looks conscious, might be I am not good enough.
Oh he is coming, let me increase my value by depicting as ‘uninterested’ !
He is looking at other hot chick also. All males are same.
I already have several ‘Tom, Dick and Harry’ following me. Why should I give him a shit.He must follow me (Famous feminine ego).
Well in every other scenario girls are equal to men. But in dating, man has to make a move!
Result : 90% of time no one can even start the conversation.
Take away :
Try to be natural.
Trust your gut feel.
Leave your false ego, manipulation,mind games behind.Just be cool.Follow your natural instinct and life shall be 100% easier.
Remember heart meets heart and ego (mind) meets ego.Life is damn simple.Only we make it complicated. A love story which can start and blossom in minutes takes weeks even to start. Huh!
Same logic applies to many other aspects of life. Except for the pure professional tasks, if you try to become natural,I guess many of your troubles with heart shall melt away.
End Note : Know the rules of manipulation but don’t apply them as long as other person is natural. Use them to tweak the abnormalities of other person. As quick a he/she is on track, drop all tricks.Natural love (relationship) is heaven. Mind game is just a fucking mind game in the end. It never soothes your nerves.Know rules to protect your self and not to harm others.Ego and desires have no end. Even if you control 100 people, mind wants more!
You know, mind is never satisfied.
425 Views · 6 Upvotes
via What is one thing about life or philosophy that you wish more people knew about or truly understood?
How did you fall in love with yourself?
Because
Because
I know myself too well.
I can think about myself all the time.
My mind doesn’t expects anything back from me.
My organs work for me unconditionally and suffer all abuse without complaining directly.
I am (and everyone else) is unique and shall remain so.
I can never betray myself.
My body and mind are my longest and most loyal companions.
My mind doesn’t judge me.
I need no sorry or thank you with myself.
Who else shall do all this for me!
369 Views · 2 Upvotes
What are the qualities of a good human being?
Apart from regular qualities of humbleness, empathy,intelligence,nobleness,kindness,
I rate quite a few qualities on a higher ladder.
Originality : Any human being must be original. In today’s era of media hype and social integration,almost nothing is original now. Even our beards and hairstyles are guided by media. Originality was and will be heavily weighed at all times. Remember fashion is NOT what everyone else is following but is what no one else is following. What you follow is a trend and not fashion. Be a trend setter and NOT a follower.
Genuineness : Second most underrated quality is genuineness. We all are fake 90% of times. Genuineness is highly valued at least in non professional interactions. Praise only genuine qualities. We are very intelligent emotionally. Genuineness also means lack of fakeness.
Integrity : In the era of infinite temptations and possibilities, integrity or honesty is also highly valued and sought after. Integrity is number one quality for employment and long term relationships.
498 Views · 9 Upvotes
Hemant Pandey’s answer to Why is it so difficult to live free? – Quora
We are not free because we are tied to things and objects and not to the goals of life.
Goal of life must be to attain absolute bliss and not material objects or people.Its okay if objects amplify your bliss or people complement it, but if people and things are sole source of your happiness, then I am sorry friend that you might be disappointed in longer run.
Why ?
Because every body want to derive their happiness from us!
We give love to people in expectation that they might return it. Our relationships are just an emotional investment. Every investment is expectation of higher return.We may love some body today but that is not unconditional.He or she must fulfill certain obligations later to be worthy of our investment!
Attachments bind them.Whenever you are attached to any thing, you are also bound by its boundaries. When ever you go for a stroll with your puppy, you are also bounded by his movements!
Lack of attachment doesn’t mean lack of love.In reality lack of attachment is real love. When ever you love with out possessing, with out owing, with out expectation, only then it qualifies of true love.
I love you or you love me is no obligation on either of us. We both are free to chose our destinies.No expectations. If it still evolves, then it is true love else it was just attachment.
Don’t you feel so ?
Love is selfless, attachment is selfish.
This is the prime reason of short term relationships now a days. Our insecurities have grown multi-fold due to excessive media exposure and hence we feel the temptations might allow other person to give up!
If love was that weak, who wants it at first place.
If the person gives up implies you were not best for him or her, let them go. What you can gain from a emotionally blackmailed forced relationship? Usually if love was there, people return to it (may be after a small flick). It further cements your relationship.
More you stop them, more they try to cut loose from you (Human nature).
Your bliss is in your mind and is NOT dependent on your physical, financial or social state of mind.Every thing else (happiness) is just a borrowed bliss.
You shall be free that day when you can be happy with out any reason and with out any outside trigger, independent of any one or any thing.
253 Views · 1 Upvote
Hemant Pandey
Hemant Pandey’s answer to What are your 5 takeaways from your life till now? – Quora
Things become more positive if you keep faith.
The only prerequisite for success is patience (perseverance).
Sex is overtly overrated (Though not always, especially if you have it with the person you mutually love).
The skinny boy you left for personality issues turns out to be absolute dude in a year and the girl you left for looks starts to challenge Deepika Padukone (Still my favorite)!
699 Views · 9 Upvotes
September 19, 2017
What are 20 random facts about yourself?
Straight forward.
Extremist. Either very simple or very complex.
Mathematician, philosopher,entrepreneur, writer,blogger.
Curious : Insatiable desire for knowledge.
Detached : Sort of detached from the world (spiritual).
Lover : Prefer true love hug to steamy sex, anytime.
Foodieeeeeee ….
Health conscious and fitness enthusiast.
Infinitely positive.
Passionate lover (No one can love like me, full time lover if I really love you).
No emotional baggage formula. I am seldom angry from anyone for ever. Our lives are too short for all the ‘Its complicated’ issues. Your ego, my ego and everyone’s ego shall be ashes one day. Let us celebrate life as long as we are here.Just a call and I am even with you again.
Self less in relationships (friendships). I don’t count pennies or time devotion when I like some one.
No expectations : Expect nothing back from love, friendships, relationships. I believe in playing my part well and go away. Don’t ever wait for other person’s turn (this is also expectation). I believe in only one thing. True love cannot be stopped.If it can be stopped, its not love in the first place. Why worry then ?
5 ft 11 inch (Both metrics are for height only!)
Flirty Lover : Fall in and out of love on daily basis.I love people in general and women in particular. I believe that women must be given all administration of world. Men are good at creating but very very bad at preserving and managing.Creation is a male thought so is destruction. Preservation is feminine.
Get bored easily.Easier to attract me but very difficult to keep me interested. I love surprises, some thrill, some action.Some tension, some friction, some spice.
Good conversationalist but often refrain from initiating.If you spend 1 hour with me, be sure that you shall enjoy it (money back guarantee!). Sometimes I am too inbound and detached from outer world that I may look like arrogant as well as indifferent. I can’t help it. Sometimes I meditate even in jam packed local train.Meditation to me is ‘supreme relaxed state of mind’. I often go into the state of flow. For hours when I am deeply involved in my work, I forget every thing, ranging from food, friends, entertainment, every thing. my work is my entertainment.
Responsive : Never fail to answer to any messages of any kind. Need my help.Drop all inhibitions and write to me or be on call. I don’t judge, I understand. I love interacting as this is the only way to get exposed to the inner self of any one. Remember only one thing. Best way to reach me is through email.
Just like water : With me, it’s only you. I don’t have any defined inner persona. I totally submerge myself in the reality and world of others. I love people, love to interact and this is what I am.
PS : Forgot to tell that I am quite moody (I switch from being in this world to detached from the world).
300 Views · 7 Upvotes ·
Could you please tell me about something(impressive) you know, except about yourself?
Some blatant truths of life…
This (and everything else) too shall pass.
We always confuse love with attachment.
Want to test whether you love some one ? Here is the rule book. Whenever some one hurts you test your reaction. If you are angry, then it was just your ego play. They are not your lover yet. If you feel pain but not anger, you are in love. We might be disappointed with people we love but cannot be angry with them for long time. Anger transforms to empathy in love. We stop judging but start understanding. Instead of inflicting them with pain we try to feel their causes of grief. In ego you react. In love, you feel. That’s mind vs heart.
We want to hold back in attachment. We want to let go in love. Love always comes back else it was just lust mixed with attraction.
Deeper you go in love, more you drop your ego. You and your love can’t coexist. One has to depart. Love is a personality in itself.
It always start with ‘I love you’. In the mean time either one of three remains. I or love or you.
Love is the simplest means to achieve eternal bliss i.e. enlightenment. Enlightenment is loss of ego. Love does it with apt ease.
45 Views · 2 Upvotes
via Could you please tell me about something(impressive) you know, except about yourself?
What are some examples of inhumanity you experienced that you cannot forget even today?
Most cruel things in life are mind (fucking) games.
Interestingly were all play, knowingly or unknowingly.
Based on evolutionary perspective, we are designed to manipulate people a little bit to suit our purpose.That is perfect and is necessary.But at times we tend to misuse and abuse our emotional intelligence to harm people.
Examples :
Dating wait list : Hot girl keeping too many back up options and keeping people in lurch and loop as well as hope. In a scenario where it is not at all difficult for a average girl to get a boy friend (May not be the desired one but any one), a hot girl has too many options at will.There is no need of back up options as such. But to kick her ego she uses (abuses) her new found (short lived though) power.Same holds for fuck boys, seducers,charmers,dandies and people conversant with cognitive emotional psychology. They keep too many girls in their charm loop (even though they might not want to date or love or fuck them), just to magnify their over blown false ego.
Lovers paradox : Our shitty mind games do not end in courtship phase.They progress further (More shittier) in relationship phase. Who should call first, text first, be more responsive,be more busy etc.etc. That is not love.It is still courtship!. We crave for power in relationships as in business negotiations. Love is love.Love means their is no window and gate left unopened for the soul.You can call any time. It is a 24 hour job, not a part time job or weekly assignment.We play with our mind even in the matter of heart! Possible reason is insecurity, false media hype non understanding partners, love out of peer pressure and not a true love etc. etc.
The nature of heart and mind is diametrically opposite.A girl might almost die to chat with her lover but most of the time refrain from initiating the text (Famous feminine ego). She can respond instantaneously means that she had time, was mentally prepared for a chat but was not initiating!
Mind wants power but heart bestows it.The real problem is that the manipulators are having such an edge in dating world now a days that genuine love is buried deep down in the closets of hearts.
Just think for a while. Do you think you are only clever person in this whole world? When you start to play, a pattern emerges. You can never break that jinx!. You are trapped in your own game. Even though you feel that you are in charge but you can also not break your own rules!
I seriously miss that innocent love of our times.
233 Views · 2 Upvotes ·
via What are some examples of inhumanity you experienced that you cannot forget even today?
Have you felt any drastic changes in your life when you started waking up early in the morning?
I am (was ) (am ) a night owl. I keep on shifting from late riser to early riser due to my nature of work.
Whenever I wake up at 6 am, following things occur.
I go for a morning stroll. Get the famous ozone and fresh morning vibes. my energy shoots up for whole day.I feel that I have awakened with the nature.My circadian rhythms are in check.More positivity through out the day.
My mind is much clear in the morning. I usually complete my core jobs at twice the speed required otherwise. I feel the urge and need for meditation (I practice vipasana mindfulness meditation).
The day feels really long and I always accomplish more as much of my job is half done before other people rise from their bed chasing that alarm clock.
Surprisingly the following night I get great sleep. I guess this has to do some thing with our evolutionary rising and sleeping with sunrise and sun set.
I have zero afternoon nap feeling.
You can never regret early rising provided you are habitual to it.
via Have you felt any drastic changes in your life when you started waking up early in the morning?
