dani > Recent Status Updates

rhys is so egotistical. bitch, just chill!

i said to myself for the last couple books i read that they only ever say “i took him in my mouth” and nothing else. i should’ve shut the fuck up. i did not need to hear all of that at all. also why did he compare her swallowing to a cat? that was disgusting. you’re ruining cats for me!

it’s so far past this point but i’m still annoyed at camille. i can’t imagine saying that you’re upset that you didn’t get to audition for a role in a movie by a director that you got FIRED from the last movie you worked with him on. OF COURSE, YOU CAN’T AUDITION FOR IT, YOU STUPID BITCH! what the fuck! i hope people lit her ass up in that imaginary comment section.

i feel like a dumbass. i know toni braxton has lupus, i know selena gomez got a kidney transplant and i still didn’t know how serious lupus was until this book. another one i don’t take seriously is celiac. i’m hoping that ain’t that bad.

doctor, my sister’s a bitch. how am i gonna get a kidney?

“did i really not even know my girl’s government name?” it’s okay, baby, neither did i.

hell yeah! thank you for that gay shit! 🙏🏾

this better be some gay shit

the book has harmed me by calling it x. it has done irrevocable damage. no one should called it x!

they want tiktok dances and viral moments from a neo soul/r&b artist? yeah, they’re fucking with her. ain’t no way. i literally can’t imagine a tiktok dance to like sadé or erykah badu.

after the second wrong “lemme guess” i would’ve shut my fucking mouth but she just keeps trying to guess. she does not have the same level of embarrassment i possess.

they were spending too much time on these random characters. i had to look at the previous books by the authors to check if they’re from another book.

man, mama, fuck outta here. he proposed to you and you knew he sucked but you still be tryna fuck him and you’re a terrible mother to boot? might as well of had the nigga in the house. it couldn’t have been any worse.

she was like, i need a hit of being a bitch. cause what the hell?

paige and cam kissed? this book is fucking testing me! this is bring it on all over again. random ass brother popping into this obviously gay story.

this book is queerbaiting me. i don’t care about brendan or the other one who is barely in the book. i’m all about paige! she pissed off in the beginning but she’s growing on me.

my gay ass started forgetting the concept and started to think cameron and paige were gonna end up together.

first of all fuck that hoe! i’m not apologizing. i’m never apologizing.

second, why the fuck are you trying to impress a boy that called you a bitch? fuck no.

third, you can’t be with someone who doesn’t understand that you are a bitch and you’re not changing ever.

they really could’ve nipped this whole scam thing in the bud if they just told her mama that she offered him half of the winnings and he declined.

ayo! please don’t fuck in your boss’s closet!

very relatable. i also like to leave or have the other person leave right after. i have things to do! you can stay i guess. i’m still gonna do what i want tho.

i was really wondering why this book was named that. also they were only enemies for 15 seconds.

“i didn’t mean to get drunk. i was perfectly sober before i started drinking.” bitch! i love you!

substituting pancakes with stale bread?? this might be funniest shit i’ve ever heard in my life. this book is so dumb. i will not allow it to convince me to read the other ones!

there is far too many inner thoughts about how good he looks. bitch, you’ve been dissociating for 3 minutes! say something!

i love nosey ass townsfolks. i don’t want anyone in my real life business but it’s funny as hell in a book.

i just listened to “gotta have you” by the weepies on repeat. that surely will not affect the way i view this book.

i will not be reading the other ones. every tidbit i hear provides with books i am not interested in conceptually. one about a pop star in a small town and the other one about the bodyguard of the pop star? yeah, i’m good.

this better not be “enemies” to lovers where one of them doesn’t actually hate the other but instead really likes them but they’re rude because they don’t know how to act like a normal person and rudeness is the only way they’re able to interact with their love interest.

deciding to read a random third book in a series is always so funny to me. i’m not gonna know anything. hopefully they’re not too connected.