jonathan, i need your help! (Everyone's Captions), Not Visiting Belgium Showing 551-600 of 1,615

[Lobstergirl, el principe]

Too many doughnuts and poor depth perception don't seem to be a problem for this lady, though.



Zhu Hao

[Janice]

Lesley reasoned that if plants responded well to someone talking to them, they'd respond even better to humans who are completely "natural" around them.

[Sarah]

Ha!

[Sarah]

Audrey misinterpreted the plant's cry of "Feed me, Seymour" as "Feed me Seymour!" Commas make all the difference, she realized. By then the plant had developed a taste for blood and clothing. She tried placating the plant with her own clothes, but it turned out the monster was only hungry for sweater vests.

[Jonathan]

Sarah Pi wrote: "By then the plant had developed a taste for blood and clothing..."

Luckily, the major was on hand to slay the vicious plant:



Edward Weston

[Lobstergirl, el principe]

Desson usually trusted his wife's fashion advice, but her plea that he wear jeggings to the archery competition seemed suspicious. He shut his ears to her mordant weeping and pulled on the flat-front, cuffed chinos.

[Jonathan]

Little did he know, the other side would be shooting back:



Paul Manship

[Lobstergirl, el principe]

Is that the NGA? Those cornices look very familiar.

[Jonathan]

Yes.

[Sarah]

Artemis was an excellent archer, but she had a disturbing habit of listening to everything her right hand (nicknamed "Rudolfo") had to say.

[Lobstergirl, el principe]

It was a similar situation when she listened to her armpit.



Barbara Crane

[Jonathan]

Are you intending to show the Beaches and Parks photo? If so, it's not coming through. I just see a blank space on the screen. (In my mind's eye it's very clear though.)

[Lobstergirl, el principe]

Crap!

(Or carp, which I typed first.)

Hold on.

[Lobstergirl, el principe]

Can you see it now?

[Jonathan]

Yes. Carp. There it is.

[Phil]

Before she was Rosie the Riveter she was known simply as Rosie the party girl. Even then, though, she enjoyed working on her pose.

[Lobstergirl, el principe]

Sometimes, rather than vamping for the camera, she just liked to stand against the wall.



Larry Sultan

[Sarah]

Later in life, Eunice began to believe she was a chameleon. Roger found it best to humor her.

[Lobstergirl, el principe]

Sometimes, Eunice thought, it felt good to just lie in the grass.



Joan Jonas

[Phil]

She's got legs... she knows how to use them...

[Janice]

Ha! Good one Phil.

Eunice wondered why her weight always went to her hips first.

[Lobstergirl, el principe]

Did someone mention legs and hips?



Lisa Yuskavage

[Jonathan]

Ewe? There's a couple in here somewhere:



William Holman Hunt

[Janice]

Baaaa Baaaaa Ha Ha Ha.... Baaaa Baaaa.... Ha Ha Ha

Hey, I don't know what you blokes heard, but dem fucking sheep is laughing.

[Jonathan]

Probably something they saw in the distance.



Karel du Jardin

[[deleted user]]

I know you are from New Zealand and you're missing home, but do I have to pretend to be a sheep every time?

[Phil]

Nice zinger, Gail. Very nice.

[Sarah]

Bun, I love 671 and 672!

Good one, Gail!

[Jonathan]

Gail «Cyborg» wrote: "I know you are from New Zealand and you're missing home, but do I have to pretend to be a sheep every time?"

That Aussie vs. New Zealand rivalry never dies down, does it? But I guess the other guys would say that it's Australia where the men are men, and the sheep are nervous. Or should that be the wallabies?



Sidney Nolan (first Australian artist in this thread, I think)

[Sarah]

#684 Steve Jobs had only recently unveiled iConvict when it got its first use.

[janine]

the humans are dead/the humans are dead/we used poisonous gasses to poison their asses

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WGoi1M...

[Jonathan]

Hah!

[janine]

Barb wrote: "janine wrote: "the humans are dead/the humans are dead/we used poisonous gasses to poison their asses

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WGoi1M..."

I ♥ this song. Mr.Barb thinks I'm insane."

You're not the insane one.

[Jonathan]

janine wrote: "the humans are dead/the humans are dead/we used poisonous gasses...



Michael Wolgemut (sometimes attrib. to Hans Holbein)

[Phil]

Supporters of republican legislators celebrate the vote to repeal the affordable care act.

[Sarah]

Ha!

[Sarah]

#691 Ricky always said that he had two left feet, but it wasn't until he was dead that he actually got to prove it. At that point he realized he didn't care any more, and proceeded to get down with his bad self.

[Kevin]

#691 - dying did not stop original deadheads from enjoying the concert. when truckin' started they def were the grateful dead

[Jonathan]

The concert crowd showed up in a variety of colorful costumes...



Antoine Watteau

[Sarah]

#696 Sylvain was pissed as hell to realize that he had once again been upstaged at his own concert, this time by a streaker in the back row.

[Jonathan]

Not just one streaker. The place was turning into a veritable nudist colony:



Lucas van Leyden

[Phil]

Despite the apparent photographic contradiction, the congressman continued to insist the only contact he had with the women was via e-mail and twitter.

[Jonathan]

We all know how the story ended. Disgraced, he had to leave the limelight behind, head back home, and repair relations with his wife:



Jan van Eyck

[janine]

All the fabric in the world couldn't hide Louisa's pregnancy anymore, but it was her wedding day and she had to at least try.

[Sarah]

#700 First Kansas, then Oz. Toto wondered where the hell he had gotten himself to now. He had to learn to stay out of the picnic basket.

[Phil]

#700

Tell me the truth, dear, do these hair-horns make me look fat?

[Sarah]

Ha! I had to go back to spot them. Nice hair horns. Poor pregnant Louisa.

[Jonathan]

Phil wrote: "#700 - Tell me the truth, dear, do these hair-horns make me look fat?"

He didn't say anything, but his eyes told the story. After the baby was born, Louisa changed her hair style, slimmed down, ditched the green dress, and resolved that she and Toto should take cha-cha lessons.

[image error]

Diane Arbus

[Phil]

It was never easy crossing the room without stepping on the pattern of the rug, but after years of practice Louisa could manage nearly every time. Toto, however, just never got the hang of it.

[Kevin]

#705 - Because she had missed a few classes, Gloria was practicing her Fembot moves at home. This one was called "power thrust double eye pock-out".