Quotes About Puns

Quotes tagged as "puns" (showing 1-30 of 120)
Alfred Hitchcock
“Puns are the highest form of literature.”
Alfred Hitchcock

Dorothy Parker
“You can lead a horticulture, but you can't make her think.”
Dorothy Parker, You Might as Well Live: The Life and Times of Dorothy Parker

J.K. Rowling
“Yeah 'ear 'ear," said George, with half a glance at Fred, the corner of whose mouth twitched.”
J.K. Rowling, Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows

Marilyn Manson
“I have mood poisoning. Must be something I hate. ”
Marilyn Manson
tags: puns

Cassandra Clare
“I'll take Shadowhunter, then. Because from what I've experienced of vampires, you mostly suck. No pun intended.”
Cassandra Clare, City of Lost Souls

Rick Riordan
“This did not seem to reassure Nico.

“I don’t like being in the dark,” he muttered.

An odd complaint for a child of Hades, but I understood what he meant.”
Rick Riordan, The Hidden Oracle

Sean Gibson
“The day I can't pull something useful out of my ass is the day I quit sticking things up my ass.”
Sean Gibson

María Amparo Ruiz de Burton
“Let us cry for the spilt milk, by all means, if by doing so we learn how to avoid spilling any more. Let us cry for the spilt milk, and remember how, and where, and why, we spilt it. Much wisdom is learnt through tears, but none by forgetting our lessons.”
María Amparo Ruiz de Burton, The Squatter and the Don

Irvine Welsh
“Aye Oedipus, yir a complex fucker right enough”
Irvine Welsh, The Acid House
tags: puns

Terry Pratchett
“I believe in reincarnation,” [Bjorn] said.
I KNOW.
“I tried to live a good life. Does that help?”
THAT’S NOT UP TO ME. Death coughed. OF COURSE... SINCE YOU BELIEVE IN REINCARNATION... YOU’LL BE BJORN AGAIN.”
Terry Pratchett, Men at Arms

Terry Pratchett
“But the helmet had gold decoration, and the bespoke armorers had made a new gleaming breastplate with useless gold ornamentation on it. Sam Vimes felt like a class traitor every time he wore it. He hated being thought of as one of those people that wore stupid ornamental armor. It was gilt by association.”
Terry Pratchett, Night Watch

Douglas Adams
“It's unpleasantly like being drunk."
"What's so unpleasant about being drunk?"
"You ask a glass of water.”
Douglas Adams, The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy

G.K. Chesterton
“Coincidences are spiritual puns.”
G.K. Chesterton

Terry Pratchett
“...All the shops have been smashed open. There was a whole bunch of people across the street helping themselves to musical instruments, can you believe that?"

"Yeah," said Rincewind. "...Luters, I expect.”
Terry Pratchett, The Light Fantastic
tags: puns

Adam Gopnik
“Wit and puns aren't just decor in the mind; they're essential signs that the mind knows it's on, recognizes its own software, can spot the bugs in its own program.”
Adam Gopnik

Jonathan Safran Foer
“I don't mind if smiles come at my expense, I'm a small price to pay.”
Jonathan Safran Foer, Extremely Loud and Incredibly Close
tags: puns

Jonathan Swift
“Punning is a talent which no man affects to despise but he that is without it.”
Jonathan Swift

Stephen Colbert
“What does Karl Marx put on his pasta? Communist Manipesto!”
Stephen Colbert

Terry Pratchett
“Biers was where the undead drank. And when Igor the barman was asked for a Bloody Mary, he didn't mix a metaphor.”
Terry Pratchett, Hogfather

Leviak B. Kelly
“They talk about human rights until the rights include things they personally do not like as alternatives. There needs to be Frank discussions. And Shirley can join too because the pun works. The ideas of human beings of all demeanor and venues are at stake here.”
Leviak B. Kelly, Religion: The Ultimate STD: Living a Spiritual Life without Dogmatics or Cultural Destruction

William Shakespeare
“Tis no mean happiness to be seated in the mean.”
William Shakespeare, The Merchant of Venice

Ridley Pearson
“Also not the kind of place to hide a server."
"Is that another pun?" She asked.
"No! I swear! I didn't mean that one."

~Shell Game, Kingdom Keepers #5”
Ridley Pearson
tags: bad, humor, puns

Terry Pratchett
“He hated being thought of as one of those people that wore stupid ornamental armor. It was gilt by association.”
Terry Pratchett, Night Watch
tags: puns

Stephan Pastis
“I seem to be able to get away with pun strips if I add a panel at the end where I somehow indicate that I know it's a bad pun.”
Stephan Pastis

Jasper Fforde
“Cucumbers are technically a fruit and in the same family as pumpkins, melons and squash, so it may benefit those markets, although, to be honest, giant melons don't strike me as potentially that commercial.”
Jasper Fforde, The Fourth Bear
tags: humor, puns

P.G. Wodehouse
“I don't get your drift."
"I will continue snowing.”
P.G. Wodehouse, Summer Lightning
tags: puns

Krisi Keley
“How many of us are there?” he demanded in a less than amused tone.
“Legions, surely, don’t you think it must be so?”
“How can you joke about even this?” he asked, anger evident in his voice. A rarity that he expressed it, or any other emotion, for that matter. Of course, that didn’t mean the emotions weren’t there, and I’d experienced every one he’d refused to show.
“Don’t knock what you haven’t tried, Michel. Trust me when I say my regular routine of self-amusement is a much better prophylactic against insanity than your grueling regimen of nightly self-flogging.”
Krisi Keley, Pro Luce Habere Volumes 1 and 2 Combined Edition
tags: humor, puns

Steven Wood Collins
“Beware of affect adorning vêtement of effect.”
Steven Wood Collins, Puramore: The Lute of Pythagoras

“Anyway, my writer gang: they kind of did their comedy apprenticeship with me and, during that period, when they were young and impressionable, I think I infected them with my pun virus. They grew to enjoy puns, think puns, just as much as me. The problem is people don't really like puns any more, so I worry I've rendered the poor fuckers virtually unemployable.”
Frank Skinner, Frank Skinner on the Road

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