Lisa Jacobson's Blog, page 57

How to Serve Your Family Good Food On a Small Budget

So I’ve noticed this strange phenomenon.

My family expects something to eat at an unusually high rate. No less than than 3 times a day.  I’m serious. I feel like we just finished eating the last meal…and there they are asking about the next one.

It’s the oddest thing.

But maybe you’ve encountered a similar situation.

Breakfast. Lunch. Dinner.

Day after day.

Not only does this take a lot of time (but that’s another post), but it takes a lot of, well, money. To put it bluntly. Let’s just say this: we have heavily invested in the grocery market.

So here my family has this high expectation of three meals a day and then there’s a further complication: I want them to eat well.  Not necessarily fancy or epicurean, but at the very least healthy and of good quality. It’s something of a challenge.

How Do You Serve Your Family Good Food on a Small Budget?

1.   Plan ahead. Of course, you already knew that, but I thought I’d mention it anyway. The more you “make a quick run to the store” the more money you’ll end up spending. Take an hour or so each week to plan your meals and write your grocery list. You can “reward yourself” for the hour by all the money you’ve saved.

2.   Simplify your meal ideas. Not only does this make it easier to menu plan (see above), but it can save you in the long run. Mix and match your basics, throwing in fresh ingredients and ta-da! you have delicious food for a lower price.

3.   Never waste food. Obvious? But I find that I still have to ride my family about not  throwing out food. Turn leftovers into casseroles, soup, or a sandwich. Just don’t waste! Unless it’s growing green fuzzies, that is, and then feed it to the chickens. Poor things.

4.   Shop at the big box stores. I know, it’s hard on the soul, but it tends to be gentler on the wallet. Not sure if I should admit this, but our Costco cashiers greet me by name and the employees ask after our children (not sure if that’s the good news, or the bad?).

5.   Clip out coupons. Now I’m not a coupon-clipper myself, but I have friends who are and can recommend a good place to start if you’re interested: The Beginner’s Guide to Coupons by LivingWellSpendingLess.

6.   Buy in bulk. And maybe you think this only applies to large families, but it’s actually a great way for anyone to save money. My in-laws buy large quantities and then freeze or bag the item into smaller portions for just the two of them. A little extra work for big savings.

7.   Grow your own. Not everyone can do this, I realize, but even if you can only grow your own herbs (just takes a sunny window), you can still save money and add wonderful flavor to whatever you cook. Home-grown tastes the best!

8.   Buy local. This might require some extra effort at first as you search out where you can get local produce and other food items, but it can really pay off. We’ve even made “swaps” with local stands and stores in exchange for a discount. You never know until you ask!

9.   Choose quality over quantity. I find that my family tends to feel more “satisfied” when I’ve served them a meal that has fresh and quality ingredients. It actually fills them up better than large amounts of cheap food and it’s certainly better for them.

10.   Give thanks for what you have. Nothing makes food taste more delicious than a grateful spirit. Thankfulness turns everything into a gourmet banquet.

All the days of the afflicted are evil, but the cheerful of heart has a continual feast. ~ Prov. 15:15

With garden tomatoes for dessert – yum! 

So do we ever just make a fun-food run to the local grocery store? You know, we do. Especially when this mom gets a craving for mint-chip ice cream.

Feeding your family and staying within the budget can be a big challenge for a mom these days, but I hope these ideas help and encourage your efforts! 

*And if you have other money-saving suggestions to add to the list here, I hope you’ll share!

In His grace,



(This post may contain affiliate links. Read my full disclosure.)

Our books are now available:  100 Ways to Love Your Husband by Lisa Jacobson and 100 Ways to Love Your Wife by Matthew L. Jacobson

If you would like these posts delivered directly to your inbox, simply subscribe below (and get the FREE eBook, The 7 Habits of a Highly Fulfilling Marriage).

The post How to Serve Your Family Good Food On a Small Budget appeared first on Club 31 Women.

What to Do When You Want Your Kids to Love Each Other

My little brother was five years younger than me, and he was a P.E.S.T.

But I was a beast to him.

There was the time my friends were over, and he just wanted to play with us. I remember him begging at my bedroom door and using his foot to keep the door from slamming in his face.

Then there were the times when mom and dad would leave me “in charge” of him, and I remember screaming at him. Screaming.

Every little thing he did annoyed me, and I was cold in return.

One day I grew up and turned around to see my little brother was wonderful. Filled with remorse for how I treated him when we were younger, I apologized.

When I became the mother of one girl and then one boy, I absolutely determined that my kids would love each other and be kind to teach other. Always I kept in my mind how horribly I had treated my little brother, and I didn’t want my kids to act that way toward each other.

When my girl was fuming because her brother was copying her artwork –He always copies what I draw, she said –I told her copying is a form of flattery.

I kept teaching the one kid to appreciate the other.

Because we need each other. A brother needs a sister and vice versa, and there’s a value in our siblings that we sometimes don’t even discover until several decades down the road.

Like that little pest of a brother I had? When my dad had a cardiac event on a snowmobile this winter, my brother spent an hour doing CPR on him, and then he got dad down off the mountain. He paid for my plane ticket to come to the funeral. He held me when I sobbed with grief. That little pest has tenderly cared for my mom and has watched over me, to the point that I have declared him a hero.

I didn’t know that when my brother was seven years old he was really Clark Kent.

Now let me tell you about my girl and boy. Recently the girl landed a sparkly on her left fourth finger, and the big decision was who would be her maid of honor?

She chose her brother.

Man of honor, that is.

And having him stand up with her was one of the great delights of her wedding day. She thinks he’s awesome, and she says so out loud all the time.

I remember back to her exasperation when he insisted on drawing what she was drawing –and the work I did in that moment to help her love him.

The work of a hundred little moments add up.

Intervening. Rebuking. Correcting.

A mom’s job is to enforce that one sibling values another, until those little turkeys catch a clue and see that value for themselves.

Do you know what my girl bought her brother for his birthday this year? Paints and canvas, although he’s all grown up now and can think of what to draw for himself.

I heard them laughing while they both painted their own pictures –the sound of two people who enjoy being with one another.

In a kajillion little ways I failed as a mom. Failed to play enough. Failed to make dinner enough. Failed to always say the right thing.

But for about 17 years I did pray over these two and taught them to love each other.

Come wedding day I celebrated not only a beautiful marriage but also the rich affection of siblings.

Christy Fitzwater is a pastor’s wife living in Kalispell, Montana. She is the mother of a son in high school and a daughter who was recently married. She enjoys when the days get shorter and the weather nasty so she doesn’t feel guilty about not going outside. Days where she can just read books and write words all day. She can even tell you the plots of 15 missionary biographies without batting an eye. You can read her personal blog at ChristyFitzwater. Also find her at Pinterest and Twitter.

 

(This post may contain affiliate links. Read my full disclosure.)

*Our books are now available:  100 Ways to Love Your Husband by Lisa Jacobson and 100 Ways to Love Your Wife by Matthew L. Jacobson

*If you would like these posts delivered directly to your inbox, simply subscribe below (and get the FREE eBook, The 7 Habits of a Highly Fulfilling Marriage).

The post What to Do When You Want Your Kids to Love Each Other appeared first on Club 31 Women.

How to Change the Laundry into the Chore You Love

She’s not really going to write an entire post on laundry, is she?

It’s alright. I know what you’re thinking and I can hardly blame you.

But, yes, I am.

Slightly disturbing, isn’t it?

But I’ll tell you why.

Laundry is a big part of my life. I mean, if I could figure out a way to include it on my resume? It would be truly impressive.

Something like this:

Laundress Extraordinaire:  Lisa is known to average 25 loads of laundry every week and earned her Stain Master degree in only a few short years.

Wow. I know.

Okay, but seriously, with 8 children – including 3 little boys and a special-needs girl – my washing machine is hardly ever lonely or bored. It chugs away both day and (often) night.

In the beginning, I fought this job. I hated chores that were never complete. Never knowing the satisfaction of “finished” because it seemed there was always another load waiting to be washed. But over the years – believe it or not! – this one has become one of my favorites. The chore I love most.

And I’m hoping that you’ll come to love it too. Or, at the very least, like it more.

Here are some ways that can help change laundry into the chore you love:

Change your mindset. Like our daughter once announced to us, “I used to have a bad attitude, but then I changed it.” She made it sound so simple. But there really is some simplicity to it. I had to decide that if laundry was going to be a part of our “family”, then I might as well embrace it. And get good at it.

Set up an effective system. And it has to be a system that works for you. For instance, I’m the one who washes all our clothes – mostly because I’m so persnickety about our clothes. Unusually so. I practically faint when someone throws a color in with my whites. Freaks me out. So I assign the folding and putting away to our children, while I wash away.

I have other friends who assign each child a “day” for when they have access to the washing machine and he/she washes all his/her own clothes. She reserves the week-ends for her and her husband’s laundry, along with other household loads. Good idea, huh?

Don’t hesitate to delegate. Share the job with kids, or a husband if he’s game. When our children were little, my mother-in-law came over and helped with the folding. For a time, we had a sweet older woman from our church offer to help me out and I’ve never forgotten her ministry to me. I’ve even “hired” a mother’s helper to give a hand and it was a terrific arrangement!

Invest in a cheerful environment. This is critical. I mean it! Do all you can to turn your laundry area into a pleasant place. And this is spoken by a woman who has a fairly tiny laundry room for such a big family. Let’s put it this way: it just barely fits two adults sneaking chocolate  ice-cream bars together. (Don’t ask how I know this. I just do.)

Yet I managed to turn my little space into a mini-Paris with a bit of inexpensive decor and fun touches. I get some strange delight in announcing, I’m off to Paris! each time I go in to start another load of laundry. And voila! it makes me smile . . . and my kids roll their eyes.

Why not create a space that is inviting and lovely to be around?

Consider it a spiritual opportunity. And, no, I’m not merely trying to tack on a spiritual message to an everyday chore. I’m perfectly serious. I really do try to remember to be thankful that I have a family to wash for and that we have clothes to wear.

A friend of mine once shared that she prays for each person as she folded their article of clothing. I sure liked that idea and try to remember to do that too.

So there you go – an entire blog post about laundry!

I hope you’re lovin’ it!

*If you have any extra tips for getting laundry done 0r making it more enjoyable,  please share!

In His grace,



(This post may contain affiliate links. Read my full disclosure.)

*Our books are now available:  100 Ways to Love Your Husband by Lisa Jacobson and 100 Ways to Love Your Wife by Matthew L. Jacobson

If you would like these posts delivered directly to your inbox, simply subscribe below (and get the FREE eBook, The 7 Habits of a Highly Fulfilling Marriage).

7 Ways to Bring Respect Back into Your Marriage

As wives, we desire our husband to love and cherish us.

We want to hear sweet nothings whispered in our ears and have love notes tucked under our pillows with pledges of love from our husbands. We like to feel our husband’s arms around us reassuring us of his affection and attention.

But, our husbands have desires too. Three of their strongest desires (in my opinion) would be respect, intimacy and food.

Most of us wives understand that our husband needs food and intimacy. It’s kind of common knowledge, but respect?

Yes, respect is a major need that he desires to be fulfilled by you, his wife. You are the one that sees him when he excels and when he fails. You are the one that he has vowed to spend a lifetime with. Yes, he needs respect from you.

But how?

How can we as wives make an honest and deliberate effort to respect our husbands — every single day?

It doesn’t come that easy when we know his weaknesses. But we have to, we need to.

Why?

Because most of us chose to marry our husbands. Most of us were not the recipients of an arranged marriage. No, we fell madly in love with one certain man and pledged our life to him. In fact, many of us quoted wedding vows with the words “honor and respect” in them — and we were talking about our husbands!

So if he needs it, and we promised to give it, then we need reminders on how to respect him every single day.

Here are some relevant, everyday tips that you can start using today to bring respect back into your marriage. A wife that respects her man is a wife that is dearly loved. It’s true! It’s a tested and proven cause and effect. Just try it for yourself!

7 Ways to Respect Your Husband

1.    Don’t nag. Wow, this is a tough one sometimes. Life gets busy and he forgets to fix the sink or cut the grass. Don’t muse on these things. Just be patient and wait. Ask that God to remind your husband of those things so you don’t feel tempted to repeat requests — over, and over and over again.

Another option? Consider taking the time to figure out how to get the job done yourself, so he can focus on other things. I know you are probably busy too, but if you can squeeze some of his duties into your schedule, you will only reap happy marriage benefits from your sacrifice of love!

2.    Just listen. As a busy mom of six, I multi-task. Do you do that too? Sometimes my multi-tasking sneaks its way into my conversations with my husband. As he’s relaying current events to me, I may be sweeping or braiding my daughter’s hair. But, one small gesture that I can do everyday to show my husband respect is to simply stop and listen. I can put down my broom for a few seconds to give him my undivided attention.

When I focus on him and his words, my body language is saying, “You’re important to me and I want to hear what you have to say.” Try it today and see an instant positive response form your hubby!

3.    Don’t correct. This is definitely a pet peeve of mine. Countless times my husband and I have been engaged in a conversation with another couple and the wife continually interrupts. “No, honey. There were three men in the store.” “No, Sweetie, you picked up the green one.” She has to correct him — or else the story would never be the same.

Don’t be that wife. I have yet to meet a husband that enjoys his wife interrupting his conversations or correct him — especially in public. It belittles him and only adds tension to your marriage.

4.    Give thanks. Did he take the family out to dinner? Did he lead the family in devotions? Did he change the light bulb? From the simplest to the most difficult tasks and gestures, thank him. Verbalizing your gratitude shows your husband that you truly respect the work he does — no matter how small or big.

5.    Praise him. Do you love your husband’s eyes? Tell him. Does he have an impressive baritone voice? Let him know you’re his biggest fan. Is a a loving father to your children? Tell him so. Take every opportunity to praise your husband. He’ll love it, and focusing on your husband’s talents and abilities will cause your heart to respect him more.

6.    Give him his own space. Men like to have their own little cubby away from everyone else. This “man cave” is a place he can go to be alone and just think. Especially if he’s a dad, there will be times when he needs to get away. Let him have that space and furnish it as he desires.

7.    Welcome his advances. Nothing makes a man feel disrespected more than a wife that pushes away his physical advances. It makes him feel undesirable. Lean in to that kiss, squeeze extra tight on that hug and focus on your special physical relationship that only you two share. Enjoying the physical part of the marriage is one of the most powerful ways to let your husband know he has your respect.

Respecting our husbands doesn’t always come easy. It’s something that God had to give us clear instructions to do. But if we do strive to respect our husbands, then we will experience a happy, close-knit marriage that few people get to experience.

Respect your husband now and cultivate a strong marriage that provides a strong foundation for a happy home.

DO YOU DESIRE TO HAVE A HAPPY HOME?

Many times we think happy homes only exist in fairy tales. Happily ever after can become your family’s story! In my new ebook 25 Days to a Happier Home I take you through 100 plus pages of 25 daily challenges that inspire you to create a happier home for your family. Parenting, marriage, home-making and financial issues are all addressed in this new book. Honest wife-to-wife and mom-to-mom advice helps encourage you to complete each challenge and continue molding your home into one of the most pleasant places on earth!

(This post may contain affiliate links. Read my full disclosure.)

25 Days to a Happier Home is available in an easy-to-read format that is available for most reading devices. Join the happier home challenges today — your family is worth it!

You can get a copy of the book HERE:

25 Days to a Happier Home

I am also giving away three ebooks to three sweet readers! I hope and pray this book will be a blessing to your home and that you and your family get to live happily ever after!

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Alison Wood is a mom of six kiddos, wife to one amazing husband, church-planting missionary in Southeast Asia and a parenting writer for online magazines. She encourages wives and moms at Pint-sized Treasures Follow her there!

6 Things Every Sister is Really Hoping to Hear from Her Brother

I am a middle child.

The only sister between two brothers.

And we grew up the way most families grew up in our neighborhood. Sometimes we fought and sometimes we had fun. We played board games together, rode the bus to school, went on camping trips, and launched huge pillow fights when our parents weren’t home (sorry about that, mom!).

I don’t remember my brothers every being truly mean to me and I knew, deep down, that they loved me.

But we didn’t really talk much about that.

Okay, we didn’t talk about it at all. It just wasn’t cool or comfortable for brothers and sisters to say that kind of stuff to each other.

So I had to wait until we were older – as in, grown-up, married-with-families-of-our-own, older – to hear that they loved and appreciated me.

And by then I was glad to hear it. Really, really glad.

But I don’t want our daughters to have to wait until they’re married and moved out to hear from their brothers. I want our sons to say what should be said now, while they’re still living in the same house together.

Because although he might not realize it, a good brother can make all the difference in a girl’s life.

Why wait until years down the road – if ever – to tell your sister what she needs to hear?

So, for all you dear brothers out there, this is for you . . . . 

6 Things Every Sister is Really Hoping to Hear from Her Brother

You are valued. You mean a lot to me and, if I’ve never told you this before, I’m thankful to have you as my sister. You’re the best!

You are lovely. And I don’t only mean “pretty” (although I think you’re that too), but that you’re a really lovely person. You bring beauty into all our lives.

You are smart. I know we don’t always see things the same way, but I like how you think and appreciate hearing your thoughts about life and ideas and adventures.

You are protected. Because I’ll do all I can to look after you. I’m watching out for you, Sis.

You are gifted. You are one talented lady and I admire your many strengths. You’re so good at whatever you set out to do and I believe you’ll go and do great things some day.

You are loved. In case you’ve been wondering, yes, I love you. And always will. No matter where life takes us and what God has planned for our future.

I will always love you, Sis.

Then you just might prepare yourself for the big hug that will probably come your way.

Because sisters can be like that.

And then you might want to hug her back.

Because you can almost bet that she’s really hoping for that too.

So go ahead and say it. A brother can make all the difference in a girl’s heart. 

*This is the companion post to 6 Things Every Brother Needs to Hear from His Sister which was in response to a young reader’s original question:  What does my brother need to hear from me?

In His grace,



(This post may contain affiliate links. Read my full disclosure.)

*Our books are now available:  100 Ways to Love Your Husband by Lisa Jacobson and 100 Ways to Love Your Wife by Matthew L. Jacobson

If you would like these posts delivered directly to your inbox, simply subscribe below (and get the FREE eBook, The 7 Habits of a Highly Fulfilling Marriage).

A Peek Into This Woman’s Everyday Marriage (and memoir giveaway)

*Guest post by my lovely friend, Emily T. Wierenga—because sometimes marriage comes hard.

The other night we left the boys with my sister, rented a hotel room in the mountains. We planned to snowboard the next day.

We bought take-out and I couldn’t rest that night. For hours, we lay there in our separate beds because the room came with two, but I couldn’t sleep. And I cried.

Trent stretched out his hand across the space between our beds, his fingers reaching for me in the dark. “Hold on to me, Em,” he said. “I’m here.”

“Hold on to me, Em. I’m here.”

We’re not exactly John and Yoko.

Trent’s a math geek and I’m a literary nerd. He’s loud and I’m quiet. He’s athletic and I run into walls. We both like books. We both love camping. And we’re both over-the moon crazy about each other and our boys.

But marriage has come hard for us.

Hard, with years of anorexia and insomnia and fists punching the wall.

I’m putting away the laundry, the seven loads which Trent folded for me while playing a computer game, because between my books and my boys, I can’t seem to take a shower or do any house cleaning. Let alone fold the laundry.

And I’m putting the baskets away when he calls “Suppertime,” because Trent’s made burgers, and on the table, a salad: with peppers and grated Jalapeno cheese, lettuce, bacon bits, and grated carrot, and chopped onions which always make Trent cry–it’s the only time I see him cry– and “I made you fancy salad,” he says.

Like my friend says, there’s nothing sexier than a salad-making man.

But truth is I’d be a wreck without my salad-making man.

The one who held me those long, skinny anorexia years.

Our best conversations happen over a board game because games are Trent’s love language, and we’re still getting the intimacy thing.

I used to fight him when I got mad, sometimes with my fists, and he’d shake his head and grab my wrists and then finally leave. Slam the door and drive off while I wept into the couch pillows, but that doesn’t happen anymore.

No man is perfect, and Trent will say things that unintentionally hurt me, or he’ll forget to take out the trash, but I will also do things–like forget his birthday, as I did one year–and ours is the kind of marriage that throbs with love.

Ours is the kind of marriage that throbs with love.

The kind of love that will not give up: not through anorexia, not through insomnia, not through moves to Korea or moves home to take care of parents with cancer, not through slammed doors or tears or fists, because there’s also the salad. There’s the laundry. There’s Trent taking the kids to his parents so I can write. There’s him reaching out in the dark to hold me, to pray for me.

I want the kind of marriage that dances into its Golden Anniversary, that kisses each other on wrinkled cheeks and laughs at each other’s jokes long after the sun has wound down.

I want the kind of marriage that dances into its Golden Anniversary.

And maybe the secret is to never stop reaching out in the dark. To never stop taking hold of each other’s hands. And to never let go.

Not even for a moment.

(This post may contain affiliate links. Read my full disclosure.)

My memoir, ATLAS GIRL, is releasing this month, and I am excited to give away TWO copies today. Just leave a comment below to win!

From the back cover:

“Disillusioned and yearning for freedom, Emily Wierenga left home at age eighteen with no intention of ever returning. Broken down by organized religion, a childhood battle with anorexia, and her parents’ rigidity, she set out to find God somewhere else–anywhere else. Her travels took her across Canada, Central America, the United States, the Middle East, Asia, and Australia. She had no idea that her faith was waiting for her the whole time–in the place she least expected it.

“Poignant and passionate, Atlas Girl is a very personal story of a universal yearning for home and the assurance that we are known, forgiven, and beloved. Readers will find in this memoir a true description of living faith as a two-way pursuit in a world fraught with distraction. Anyone who wrestles with the brokenness we find in the world will love this emotional journey into the arms of the God who heals all wounds.”

Click HERE for a free excerpt.

I’m also giving away a FREE e-book to anyone who orders Atlas Girl. Just order HERE, and send a receipt to: atlasgirlbookreceipt@gmail.com, and you’ll receive A House That God Built: 7 Essentials to Writing Inspirational Memoir – an absolutely FREE e-book co-authored by myself and editor/memoir teacher Mick Silva.

ALL proceeds from Atlas Girl will go towards my non-profit, The Lulu Tree. The Lulu Tree is dedicated to preventing tomorrow’s orphans by equipping today’s mothers. It is a grassroots organization bringing healing and hope to women and children in the slums of Uganda through the arts, community, and the gospel.

Emily T. Wierenga is an award-winning journalist, blogger, commissioned artist and columnist, as well as the author of five books including the memoir, Atlas Girl: Finding Home in the Last Place I Thought to Look (Baker Books). She lives in Alberta, Canada with her husband and two sons. For more info, please visit www.emilywierenga.com. Find her on Twitter or Facebook.

6 Things Every Brother Needs to Hear from His Sister

What does my brother need to hear from me? As his sister?

That’s the question the young lady posed to me.

While I’ve been asked many things since I started this blog, this one was a first.

And it was a great question.

You see, we have four sons and four daughters. Four brothers and four sisters.

And we’ve seen the power that a sibling’s voice has in your life. We’ve watched it play out over the years – for building up, or for tearing down.

We also know adults who still struggle with the voices of their childhood and have been impressed with the staying power of a sibling’s influence.

In other words, a sibling’s voice is strong . Very strong.

When you and I were growing up? Families focused on simply trying to stay together. Not a lot of thought was put into sibling relationships and how they would affect the rest of our lives.

Sure, kids bicker and fight. Some get along and some don’t.

But what a brother needs from his sister? What a sister needs from her brother? Probably not much purposeful guidance there.

So let’s do it differently. Let’s teach our daughters what their brothers need to hear from them. Let’s help them understand the powerful role they have in their brothers’ lives and how much they can build up and influence them to be their best.

6 Things Every Brother Needs to Hear from His Sister:

I respect you. Every young man – no matter how young – needs to feel respect from the women in his life. I can’t even explain why this is so very powerful, but I can testify that it’s a strong need in every guy’s life.

I appreciate you. Your brother wants to know he is valued for the contribution he makes to the family – and more specifically to your life. Don’t neglect to express your thankfulness for who he is and all that he adds to your lives.

I depend on you. Even our very youngest guy like to feel he is somehow indispensable. He needs to know we count on him and that he plays an important role in our family.

I like you. Just the way you are. I enjoy your unique qualities and, yes, even your very own personality quirks. Basically, I think you’re a neat person.

I am loyal to you. You’ll never need to worry about what I’ll say to others about you. You can be assured that I will always have your back. I’ll keep our disagreements between ourselves and not put you down in front of others.

I am there for you. You can count on me, if you need something or just someone to listen to you. I’m not going anywhere and plan on being your sister for a very long time. My hope is that we’ll always be close, wherever God takes us down the road.

Sisters, you might not fully realize what a difference you can make in a young man’s life, but you have the chance to be the voice in your brother’s life that he will carry with him for many years to come.

Use your voice well. Say it with words and say it with actions.

Let him know that you love him and you want to be the sister he needs.

*For those who might be asking, yes, it’s my intention to address what a sister needs to hear from her brother as well. And ,while all these might also apply in the reverse, this post is the specific response to a young lady’s question: What does a brother need to hear from his sister? and was addressed as such. Thank you for understanding.

In His grace,



(This post may contain affiliate links. Read my full disclosure.)

*Our books are now available:  100 Ways to Love Your Husband by Lisa Jacobson and 100 Ways to Love Your Wife by Matthew L. Jacobson

If you would like these posts delivered directly to your inbox, simply subscribe below (and get the FREE eBook, The 7 Habits of a Highly Fulfilling Marriage).

Why A Modern-Day Woman Would Give Old-Fashioned Respect to Him

I left home at the ripe old age of 18.

Seeking an education.

Hoping for adventure.

And looking for love.

You know, looking for him – that guy I’d want to walk beside for the rest of my days. And to sleep by his side on the same starry nights.

It would be another 8 long years before I found him.

By then I’d been in school for 7 of those years and traveled and studied in 8 different countries. London, Paris, Yaounde, Jerusalem. A wanderer.

By then, an educated, modern-day woman.

But just like girls have been doing since time began, I fell in love.

When he asked me to marry him, the answer was an enthusiastic yes!

And so I became his wife.

Later, after we’d been married for a while – months and months, if not a year or two – I came across the most surprising Scripture.

Here’s what it said:

. . . and let the wife see that she respects her husband. (Eph. 5:33)

I was stunned.

Now surely I’d read that same verse hundreds of times in the many years I’d attended church and studied in seminary.

But it might as well have been the first time I’d seen it.

I stared at the man who was busy unclogging the kitchen sink. Might as well have been the first time I’d seen him too.

I looked back down at the Bible.

Then back up at him.

Respect.

Your husband.

See to it.

And I realized that God was talking to ME.

About HIM.

God was telling me that  I was to honor him, to look up to him, and to follow him.

And yet this concept went against nearly everything I had absorbed in the previous years.

As in, diametrically opposed. Antithetical. Worlds clashing.

Because I ‘d learned a lot about self-reliance  and self-respect in my studies and travels.  And I had learned those lessons well.

But him-respect?

Not so much.

Okay, not at all.

I loved him. Unreservedly. I could give him my love easily enough.

But now I was supposed to give him my respect too? Such an old-fashioned way of doing things.

I had some serious thinking to do.

No, it was more than thinking. This required some wrestling.

I mean what do you do when the Word of God instructs you to do something that is contrary to all that has been poured into you for so many years ?

You wrestle.

And you? Have you wrestled?

Do you know what it’s like to find out what is right – what the Bible clearly instructs – and yet seems to go against everything around you? Maybe against everything inside you?

It’s because we’ve been informed by the world, rather than by the Bible.

And no one minds so much if we talk about loving him . . .

But respecting him is an entirely different matter. That feels too much like women giving up our rights and giving up ground.

More than anything, respect feels too much like giving up our self.

So that’s why I never “saw” that verse before. I didn’t want to see it.

But God’s truth is timeless. It doesn’t matter what age we live in, what we’ve learned, or what ground we’ve “gained”.  As followers of Christ, we get to follow His Word even if it is completely out of step with the times.

Now I choose to respect my husband. Not because it’s fashionable or popular, but because it is God’s instruction for wives.

And, by God’s grace, I am his wife.

Walking by his side for the rest of our days.

And sleeping by his side all the same starry nights.

A modern-day woman who is committed to love –  and respect –  him. 

~ The Love Lock Bridge, Paris, France ~

In His grace,



(This post may contain affiliate links. Read my full disclosure.)

*Our books are now available:  100 Ways to Love Your Husband by Lisa Jacobson and 100 Ways to Love Your Wife by Matthew L. Jacobson

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A Charming Children’s Series – At Long Last: A Review of The Growly Books

At long last!

I can’t tell you how long I’ve been looking for a good, wholesome children’s series.

Do you realize how hard this is to find these days? Our children have blown through all the classic children’s series . . . So then what?

That’s why I was so thrilled when I found out about the Growly Books series by Philip and Erin Ulrich. I’d heard such lovely things that I had to check it out for myself.

And I was not disappointed.

These books are absolutely delightful!

My husband asked me in the car yesterday what it was that I liked so much about them and here’s what I told him:

Wholesome. We want our children to “feed” on books with solid, family values and that’s becoming an increasingly rare find.

Intelligent. The authors use terrific vocabulary words and relatively sophisticated sentence structure. Our kids don’t appreciate “silly talk” or “dumbing down”. They vastly prefer to reach up than to bend down.

Darling illustrations. These are some of the sweetest children’s illustrations I’ve seen in a  long time. They’re adorable, but not so “cutesie” as to put off our 10 year old son.

Short chapters. If your child is still a newer reader, he/she can read through the entire book, taking one, “chewable” bite at a time.

A Read aloud. If your child is not a reader yet? These would also make for a perfect read aloud.

(This post may contain affiliate links. Read my full disclosure.)

The Growly Books

By Philip and Erin Ulrich

Illustrated by Annie Barnett

Pages: ranging from 254 – 274 (depending on the book)

Here We Go Productions (2013, 2014)

Age Recommendation: 8- 12 years (although I’d include 4 – 7 year olds)

The Growly Books: Begin (Volume 1)

For centuries the bears of Haven have lived quiet lives, high in the mountains at the edge of the great Precipice. That all changes for a young cub named Growly when he receives a mysterious message. With just his backpack and glider, Growly sets out on a desperate journey to find his grandfather’s long lost friend . . . and to find a way back home.

Begin is the first book in The Growly Books series. Written for the 8-12 year old reading level, it is also a captivating read aloud for younger children. The book contains 35 chapters and 13 illustrations.

Available here: The Growly Books: Begin (Volume 1)

The Growly Books: Widewater (Volume 2)

Growly’s adventure has taken him far from home in search of C.J., his grandfather’s long-lost friend who disappeared over The Precipice. Now, the desperate quest continues as Growly, Chippy, and Tully find themselves facing a journey across the Ocean. In a makeshift sailboat, Growly and his friends embark on their greatest adventure yet. It is a journey that will take them to far-off lands and mysterious cities—into the unknown … across the wide, wide water.

Available here: The Growly Books: Widewater (Volume 2)

The Growly Books: Morning (Volume 3)

Growly, Chippy, and Tully have braved the Ocean and a mysterious ruined city to find C.J., the elder bear who disappeared many years before. Now, with time running out, the friends must search for clues to find a way back up The Precipice. As their journey takes them into places unknown, Growly is about to realize that sometimes the greatest adventure is finding the way back home.

Available here: The Growly Books: Morning (Volume 3)

*Special note: The authors are currently offering an autographed set of the complete trilogy for one week, for those who purchase a bundle of all three.  See here for more information: The Growly Books Trilogy.

(Isn’t the illustration darling? And notice how loving the parents are with each other….oh, yes. Thank you. )

The Growly Books is one of the best children’s trilogies I’ve come across in years. These books are full of fun, family adventure which offer our children uplifting life lessons – all wrapped up in an engaging story. Delightfully illustrated, they make for fabulous chapter books for your new reader, or wonderful read alouds for the entire family. Highly recommended.

A charming children’s series – at long last!

I hope you’ve found this Club31Women Book Review helpful and inspiring.

In His grace,

20 Touches of Beauty – All for Under Ten Dollars

He likes to call me his Budget Queen.

And I can’t say that I mind.

Take it as a compliment really.

Because it’s true: I love a bargain. I feel this strange sense of delight when I come across a “terrific find”.  A screaming-mimi deal.

And if it blesses my family and cheers up my home?

Well, it just doesn’t get much better than that.

And you? Have you wanted to brighten up your home, but don’t know where to begin? Can’t imagine how you’d afford it?

I totally get that.

But I’m here to tell you that it’s far easier than you might think – and far cheaper than you might imagine.

In fact, I’m going to share some of my very best Budget Queen secrets when it comes to bringing beauty into your home.

Ready. . . ?

20 Touches of Beauty for Under Ten Dollars

Arrange fresh cut flowers. Even a few daisies look charming in a small jar.
Set out some cheery candles. I rely on the Dollar Store for these simple beauties.
Gather seashells. Of course, we live near the West Coast, so this is easy enough for us. Unique, interesting shapes and colors.
Reach back in time. Pull out your grandma’s tea-cup, her yellowed handwork, her spectacles. I love throwing in (not literally!) my grandparents’ “pretties”.
Bring out your favorite books. I’ve set out this gorgeous copy of Out Of Africa in my living room.  Adds a slightly exotic touch to our country home.
Stack up some rocks. I’m serious. You’ll find rocks all over my house. Some I even put out there on purpose (I’m a mom of boys, remember?).
Pick up a can of paint. My husband is the one who taught me this trick: a can of spray paint can do wonders to just about any item!
Find frames for old – or new – photographs. Picture frames are abundant in your second-hand stores and plentiful in the clearance section of any craft or Target-type store.
Place a potted plant in the windowsill. That right there can make all the difference!
Go treasure-hunting. Or, as my mom calls it, “junking”. Second-hand stores, garage sales, and clearance sales. My husband and I enjoy poking around (okay, me more than him) and seeing if we can uncover something really special.
Show off your best dishes. Why hide these treasures in the cupboard? Put them out where they can be enjoyed by all.
Display old mementos. I picked up a “memory board” and we keep mementos from our travels there: foreign money, photos, train tickets, etc.
Spread out a table runner. And I don’t just mean on the dining table – across a coffee table, a sideboard, the old piano. It can work magic!
Take pride in your children’s art. Frame it and let people enjoy it for years to come.
Put out those gorgeous foods. Limes, bright apples, chocolate – show it off. Chocolate is always beautiful.
Plump up a pretty pillow. This is one of the few things that makes my husband groan. I’ve got a thing for pillows though. Toss them everywhere (and he tosses them right off – we’re still working that one out).
String up twinkly lights. Maybe it’s because I grew up 10 minutes from Disneyland, but you’ll find little lights all-year round at our place. Twinkly lights make me happy.
Pull out swaths of fabric. My mom is amazing at this. She takes long strips of fabric and wraps them around her stairs, across the windows, or many other unexpected places. She’s got the “knack” – and I’m still learning.
Make the most of ribbons and bows. Lots of bang for this buck. Scoop up rolls of ribbon when you go by the clearance bin of your favorite craft store. I promise – it will come in handy.
Tuck in some dried flowers. Roses, birthday bouquets, lavender – dry those precious things and save them to cheer up a rainy day.

*BONUS:  Express joy.

It’s the best “decor” you can find in a home.

Transforms the shabby and brightens up the plain.

Makes everything seem beautiful.

And it does’t cost anything. Just a smile.

*Okay, your turn. What are some of your tips for bringing beauty into your home – and staying within the budget? 

In His grace,



(This post may contain affiliate links. Read my full disclosure.)

*Our books are now available:  100 Ways to Love Your Husband by Lisa Jacobson and 100 Ways to Love Your Wife by Matthew L. Jacobson

If you would like these posts delivered directly to your inbox, simply subscribe below (and get the FREE eBook, The 7 Habits of a Highly Fulfilling Marriage).