Luna Carruthers's Blog

I’m an introvert with social anxiety. Any tips for going to munches or scene events?

Walking into a munch or community event for the first time can feel like stepping into a lion’s den—especially if you’re introverted or struggle with social anxiety. The truth is, many submissives (and Dominants, too) in the scene are introverts at heart. We’re drawn to meaningful, one-on-one connection, not noisy rooms or forced small talk. […]

The post I’m an introvert with social anxiety. Any tips for going to munches or scene events? appeared first on Submissive Guide.

What to Wear to a BDSM Play Party

Not sure what to wear to your first play party or dungeon event? From lingerie and fetish fashion to roleplay looks and budget-friendly ideas, this guide helps you feel confident, comfortable, and scene-ready. Discover how to dress for your dynamic and express your authentic self while respecting community etiquette.

The post What to Wear to a BDSM Play Party appeared first on Submissive Guide.

My long distance partner cuts communication with me and it hurts, what can I do?

Question: I have recently begun a D/s long-distance dynamic relationship. It’s exhilarating and freeing at times, but then he cuts communication with me. It’s so painful and frustrating. Sometimes I know why (pleasuring myself without permission), and most times idk why he’s cut me off. Prior to agreeing to accept him as my master, we […]

The post My long distance partner cuts communication with me and it hurts, what can I do? appeared first on Submissive Guide.

Finding Sanctuary in Submission When the World Feels Heavy

When the world feels overwhelming, submission can offer comfort and grounding. This heartfelt reflection explores how to protect your peace, reconnect with your rituals, and rediscover the quiet strength of surrender during turbulent times.

The post Finding Sanctuary in Submission When the World Feels Heavy appeared first on Submissive Guide.

How can I find new creative ways to be bratty?

This is a specific question that is important to answer in a broader context. “How can I find new creative ways to further explore (insert desired kink)?” It is common in online communities to crowdsource ideas for play. It is often met with the same response: “We can’t tell you what turns you or your […]

The post How can I find new creative ways to be bratty? appeared first on Submissive Guide.

Expectations of a Submissive: What You Need to Know (and What You Don’t)

What are you expected to do and know as a submissive? For many who are just starting out, the answer really is: not much. And yet, that’s never a satisfying answer, is it? We all want clarity, especially when stepping into something as vulnerable and meaningful as submission. Of course, there’s more to it. But […]

The post Expectations of a Submissive: What You Need to Know (and What You Don’t) appeared first on Submissive Guide.

How do we find the perfect collar?

Choosing a collar is one of the most meaningful decisions a D/s couple can make. Much like an engagement or wedding ring, a collar represents commitment, devotion, and the unique bond between Dominant and submissive. That’s why the “perfect” collar isn’t about what looks best in a shop window—it’s about what carries meaning for both […]

The post How do we find the perfect collar? appeared first on Submissive Guide.

5 Simple Steps to Creating a Personal Submissive Mantra

Submissive mantras are powerful tools for grounding, focus, and resilience in D/s dynamics. Learn what mantras are, how they differ from affirmations, and why they’re especially valuable for submissives. Discover practical steps to create your own mantra and keep your submission intentional, centered, and joyful.

The post 5 Simple Steps to Creating a Personal Submissive Mantra appeared first on Submissive Guide.

My Dominant wants to be left alone to unwind after a long day but I’m so anxious to see her that she complains, how can I treat her better?

Question: I am a house husband. My dom wife wants to be left alone after a long day at work to unwind, but I am so anxious to see her that she complains I am too needy. How can I, as a house husband, treat her better to show my submissive desires? Answer: One of […]

The post My Dominant wants to be left alone to unwind after a long day but I’m so anxious to see her that she complains, how can I treat her better? appeared first on Submissive Guide.

Solo-coaching: Releasing Defensive Patterns as a Submissive

Defensive habits like fight, flight, freeze, and fawn often keep us from the vulnerability and openness submission requires. In this Solo-coaching session, we explore how these self-protective patterns show up in D/s dynamics, why they no longer serve us, and practical steps submissives can take to release them and build deeper trust.

The post Solo-coaching: Releasing Defensive Patterns as a Submissive appeared first on Submissive Guide.