Helene Lerner's Blog, page 68

Head of Catalyst Speaks Out on Gender Inequality at Work

Growing up in a blue collar family in a Nova Scotia fishing village, Deborah Gillis was told that education was the key to new opportunities. Neither of her parents had graduated from high school and raising 5 children was often a struggle on their limited resources. But Deborah took their advice to heart—and was the first in the family to go to University. She took jobs cutting grass, washing dishes, and worked in a toilet paper factory to help pay for her education. Now she’s the president and CEO of Catalyst, the leading global nonprofit organization with a mission to expand opportunities for women and business.

Check out some of these highlights from Helene’s sit-down interview with Deborah. 

Helene: Do women support women enough?

Deborah: Catalyst research clearly shows that women support other women. In fact, they are more likely to mentor than men are. Yet the Queen Bee myth persists. I believe gender stereotypes come into play here. Women are expected to be nurturing, caring and supportive, and when they act outside those stereotypes they experience pushback or are held as examples of their entire gender. I challenge this Queen Bee myth, both based on research and my own experience. 

Helene: If a woman is assertive, she's labeled a bitch. That doesn’t happen to men. What do you think that is?

Deborah: Catalyst research shows there’s a dilemma for women in leadership—damned if you do, doomed if you don't. Good leadership isn’t gender specific; we need to redefine what successful leadership characteristics are. Part of it is courage: being prepared to take some chances and being true to your own values. It’s particularly hard for women because they’re often faced with stereotypes that make it difficult for them to take tough positions, even if they know they’re the right ones. They have to stick to their principles. True leadership is not a function of authority but of behavior, and demonstrating the leadership behaviors that Catalyst research links to inclusion: Empowerment, Accountability, Courage and Humility.

Helene: How can men help encourage women?

Deborah: We need men standing alongside us. They also need to be champions and role models, and should call out behaviors that are discriminatory or sexist. 

When women ask how they can help create change, I tell them to mentor a man. When a man is in that mentee role, it leads to a better understanding of what it’s like for women in business and his perspective changes. 

Helene: Do women need to push themselves more? 

Deborah: Pushing ourselves outside of our comfort zone can be a little risky, but those are the times when we have the opportunity to shine. So if your knees aren't knocking a little bit, you're probably in the wrong job. Everyday my knees shake and that's a good thing. 

Helene: What has always helped me take the next step was my desire to be of service. It was greater than my fear. Is that true for you?

Deborah: I was never interested in the next title or the next salary increase. I was motivated by what I could learn and contribute. Every career step was with that in mind. 

I talk about this with young women who are often uncomfortable with self-promotion. I tell them that self-promotion needs to be done in a certain way. Talk to your boss about your accomplishments and how you can move organizational goals and priorities forward. Talk about how you can help your organization achieve its goal. We can make more women comfortable talking about their successes by framing it as being in service to a broader goal. 

 

Deborah Gillis and Helene Lerner

Helene: How do you see executive presence?

Deborah: I have some concerns about the words we use to describe leadership. They carry with them an implicit bias of what success looks like and what's required to be successful. So often when someone says “executive presence,” they’re really thinking of a male leader (usually a tall white man) or about the way someone dresses, when they should be thinking about skills like poise under pressure and the ability to read the room, etc. 

Helene: What do you want for girls around the world? 

Deborah: I hope they don't see any obstacles and are able to do whatever they want. How do we achieve this? By seeing more women in leadership positions in all industries and sectors. Whether it’s as the CEO of a Fortune 500 company or President of the United States or—you can't be what you can't see. 

Helene: What exciting research will you be doing in 2016? 

Deborah: Our research agenda has two main focuses. One is finding ways to engage men in gender diversity. The second is researching the differences in experience of women and people of color in workplaces. We want to create more inclusive workplaces for everybody, not just for women. 

Helene: Where do you see us in the next 50 years?

Deborah: We aspire for a world where gender equality is the norm and power is shared equally in the workplace and at home. That's the world we want to see and I hope that it won’t take 50 years to achieve gender equality. 

Have a Great Life by Celebrating YOUR Successes!

As we move into the season of gratitude and introspection, we have an opportunity to assess and evaluate our lives and our work over the last year, acknowledge what we have accomplished, and set our direction for the future.

Until we acknowledge what we have accomplished and celebrate those successes, we cannot set our future direction. Knowing where we are and what we have accomplished allows us to set direction and move forward.

I have been coaching executives, executive teams and people in organizations for over 25 years, and without exception everyone I have worked with is looking to HAVE A GREAT LIFE. They want to do impactful work, feel acknowledged and appreciated, be fully engaged, and feel they are part of a team that is producing great results.

The Gallup employee engagement statistics states that only 35% of all employees in the US are engaged with their work. Therefore I ask, how can you have a great life if you are not engaged with your work?

Being engaged in your work is a key component of HAVING A GREAT LIFE.

Through my consulting practice I have come across people that are not engaged in their work. I have found that people do not stop to celebrate their successes; they get one task done, check the box, go on to the next task, check the box and this goes on forever. They never see the small wins, the day-to-day successes and accomplishments.

One of the key principles to embrace while embarking on a journey of HAVING A GREAT LIFE is celebrating your successes.

Take a few minutes and reflect on the following questions, and take time to write your answers. 

What have you accomplished this year? What have you set out to do and what have you done?  What impacts have your accomplishments made on you? What impacts have your accomplishments made on your team, department and organization? Have you acknowledged yourself for these accomplishments? 

All the praise in the world will make no difference until you acknowledge yourself and own your accomplishments and your successes.

Have you been acknowledged by others for these accomplishments? If not, is it because they do not know about them? Could it be that you have hidden your accomplishments from others? Or is it because you are not allowing yourself to let people praise you?

Some of the ways people divert praise is by saying, “It was nothing.” By diverting acknowledgement we rob ourselves of our success and our ability to naturally build confidence. Identifying times when you deflected an acknowledgement allows you to accept it next time.  

To HAVE A GREAT LIFE celebrate your successes. Identify your accomplishments and what you have learned about yourself and others while producing these results. Pat yourself on the back, and accept others’ acknowledgements of your accomplishments. 

In doing this you will set up a virtuous cycle of acknowledgement and appreciation and will naturally elevate your performance and confidence; you willl start HAVING A GREAT LIFE.

—Ilene Fischer, Partner, Mark Kamin and Associates

Say Hello To Our November Coach!

Hi my name is Ilene Fischer I am the Womenworking.com Career Coach for November 2015, a little background about me...

I have 25 years of expertise and experience working with clients to:

Establish an environment for organizational transformation and extraordinary performance to occur
Create alignment and collaboration around essential business mandates
Execute on strategic initiatives and key projects
Engage individuals in the execution of organizational strategic initiatives while expressing their passion for work
Coach executives to think systemically and produce breakthrough results.

I have sold, managed and led complex engagements with clients in industries as varied as healthcare, financial services, pharmaceutical, oil and gas, banking, food and beverage, telecommunications, paper, government and consumer products.

Some of the companies I’ve consulted with: Coca Cola, Odwalla, NASA, Pfizer, Towers Watson, CARA, International Paper, El Paso, Momenta Pharmaceutical, Anthem Blue Cross Blue Shield.

I am the Founder, Board chair and former CEO of WomenLEAD; an online women’s leadership development platform to advance women leaders. WomenLEAD was a 2013 Mass Challenge Finalist and a 2013 Verizon Powerful Answer Award winner.

I was CEO of WEST, a non-profit organization whose mission was to advance women in (STEM) science, engineering, technology and math; in their career. I served as Managing Director for consulting services for the Tom Peters Company. Tom is the author of In Search of Excellence and Re-Imagine! I was a Partner at PA Consulting; managing the Organizational Learning and Change practice in the US. I was a Partner at Innovation Associates (IA), founded by Peter Senge, Professor at MIT Sloan and author of The Fifth Discipline: The Art and Science of a Learning Organization .I was also a Quality Manager at Honeywell’s electro optic division, and a chemical engineer at Raytheon.

Ilene Fischer has a B.S. in Chemistry and studied business at Harvard University. She published an article on culture change in Business 2.0 and she was a contributor to The Fifth Discipline Field Book by Peter Senge and is a regular blogger for Huffington Post Women.

A Woman's Worth

Don't try to tell her differently because a strong woman knows where her worth comes from.

It is not from externals, but comes from an inner knowing that she is more than okay.

Celebrate her specialness. Speak her praises. Never berate her. She is a once in a lifetime kind of woman.

Happy Halloween!

Happy Halloween from WomenWorking.com! What are your ghoulish plans?

SUBSCRIBE to our YouTube channel for more videos! 

Video Editor: Christian Motos

Celebrating the Resilience of Women in Art

From a young age Andrea Arroyo was an independent and curious child, who always had an interest in the visual arts. When she was 20 years old she made a bold decision and moved to New York City with plans to study with avant-garde choreographer Merce Cunningham for 6 months. She remembers falling in love with the diversity and energy of the city, and she never left. 

Her work “Viva la Vida," a homage to Frida Kahlo, will be available to view at the New York Botanical Gardens until November 1, 2015. Here are some highlights from our interview with Andrea.  

You were originally a professional dancer. How did you make the move to visual art?

Even while I was a professional dancer, I was always interested in the visual arts. When I visited the British Museum, I was moved to tears while marveling at the ancient sculptures of Assyria. Back in New York City I created my first body of work and became a professional artist almost immediately.

The transition from dance to the visual arts felt organic. Although I have been a full-time visual artist for many years, my background as a dancer informs all my work.

In the past, you were asked to create work for the Clinton Global Initiative. What was it like working with this team?

Working with the Clinton Global Initiative team was wonderful. I was provided with the most important elements of an art project – support and creative freedom. These kinds of high-profile projects give me a larger platform and an opportunity to reach a worldwide audience.

Major themes in your work seem to be women and their stories. What draws you to this?

I have always been interested in the stories and issues that affect women around the world. I believe that women have always been warriors; they are also poets and visionaries whose strength inspires me.

In my work I also honor the female body and strength of mind, as well as the collective power of sisterhood.

What can you tell us about your piece, "Viva la Vida”?

 “Viva la Vida” is a site-specific installation that includes a reproduction of the pyramid from Frida Kahlo’s house in Coyoacán, Mexico. The piece is a contemporary take on traditional Day of the Dead altars from Mexico and is a celebration of women’s resilience.

The piece is inspired by Frida’s artistic vision and personal determination, and the title is taken from Kahlo’s farewell signature in one of her paintings.

What’s your advice to young girls who are afraid to share their art?

My advice to young women is to always speak your mind. We all have something to contribute and art is a wonderful way to build community, tackle important issues, and bring beauty to the world.

Never be afraid to speak out, we need to have our voices heard. We also need to listen and support each other as we navigate the challenges of our lives today.

Learn more about Andrea and her work here. 

Change Your Perspective, Change Your Life

I’m going to share something with you today that can change your life as soon as you start to apply it. It might seem ridiculous at first, but here it is: I tell my clients, "You don’t ever need to do anything you don’t want to do.” If you’re thinking, “What!?” do your best to keep an open mind because it’ll be worth it.

When my clients first hear what I’m saying, they think I’m either crazy or selfish. Sometimes they think I’m both. They tell me they have to do a lot of things they don’t want to do. “After all,” they say, “even if you love your job, you have to do some things you don’t want to.” Then I tell them that’s not true. Now they think I’m lying to them, but I’m not.

It’s all a matter of perspective. Whatever you do—even if it’s something you tell yourself you don’t want to do—you must see some benefit in doing it on some level or you wouldn’t do it. What if you stopped and asked yourself, “What are some ways I would benefit from doing this?” What if you went through your entire day with this question?

How would that change how you feel about everything you did? For instance, if you believe you have to go to a meeting you’ve been dreading, you’ll only make it worse by telling yourself, “I hate meetings. I don’t want to go to this meeting.” What if you worked to find the positive benefits in attending that meeting?”

I challenge my clients to dig deeper and ask themselves why they go to meetings they say they don’t want to go to. They start off by saying, “Because it’s part of my job and I’m expected to be there.” When I ask them to go on, they say, “I like my job. It’s how I help take care of my family, it pays for our vacations and it’s going to send my kids to college—so in the bigger scheme of things, I go to a meeting because it helps me do all the other things I want to do.”

Can you begin to see the difference of continuing to do things while telling yourself, “I don’t want to do this,” versus doing things after finding better reasons for doing so? Thinking, “I have to go to this meeting” will make you frustrated at best and miserable at worst. Thinking, “I want to go to this meeting, when I consider how it helps me in the long term,” will help you not only feel better, but will also empower you to be the professional you are.

It’s not that discovering the deeper and better reasons we do something turns it into one of our favorite things to do—it doesn’t. Finding the deeper reasons we have for doing what we know we’re going to do anyway changes our perspective. Wayne Dyer, Ph.D said it best:  “When you change the way you look at things, the things you look at change.” That’s why we sometimes say, “Perspective is everything.”

- Alan Allard, Executive Coach

Two Keys to Stop Self-Sabotaging and Achieve More

A friend asked to talk with me this week because he felt he wasn’t keeping his promise to exercise three to four times a week. He also talked about a dream he’s had for ten years but has done little with. He wanted to know why he was disciplined in some areas of his life and not in others. If you’re not making the progress you want towards a goal or a dream for your life, keep these two things in mind:

Are you sabotaging yourself?

I believe we make the best choices we can in the moment. We mean well and have positive intent behind what we do or don’t do. For instance, the positive intent behind procrastinating might be to feel better in the moment. However, just because there’s positive intent doesn’t mean there’s going to be positive results—at least not in the long run. Are you sabotaging your health goals, your happiness or your relationships in some way? It’s not enough that you want to lose weight if you want other things more—such as wanting to deal with your stress by eating comfort foods. How do you stop sabotaging yourself to make faster progress towards success?

Solution: You’re going to have to resolve your inner conflicts if you want to make better progress. That will take some time and effort and you have to ask yourself if it’s worth it. What will help you stop sabotaging yourself and start supporting yourself with better choices and behaviors? It could be something as simple as the right book, webinar, workshop or several conversations with a wise friend. It could take more than that and it often does. What are you willing to do to get what you want?

Do you need to be more reasonable with yourself?

As a former psychotherapist and now an executive coach and life coach I often talk to prospective coaching clients that are smart and successful—but weighed down with unreasonable expectations when it comes to their progress. One of my clients is super smart and driven and is beginning to learn how to set reasonable expectations for herself. She’s discovered that by understanding her needs and taking care of them she is able to stay energized and do better work and enjoy life on a whole new level. 

Solution: The truth is sometimes you have to slow down to speed up. You can only sprint for so long but if you pace yourself you can go as far as you want. If you want to set a stretch goal to find out what your limits are, that’s perfectly fine. Just make sure you identify short-term steps along the way that you can easily take. Each small step might seem insignificant but they give you the confidence and positive energy to take the several big steps you’ve planned along the way to your final goal. To achieve your wildest goals in life it turns out you need to be reasonable along the way.

- Alan Allard, Executive Coach

Two Tips for Dealing With Tough Times

If you want to do well in life, you have to be prepared to handle any challenges that come your way. I don’t know of anyone, no matter how positive, loving or altruistic, that has managed to have a problem-free life. Challenges are unavoidable and we will either grow from them or they will wear us down. If you’re dealing with a big challenge or want to prepare for when one comes, here are two things to keep in mind:

Assume there are solutions

There are times when we feel we can’t go on or that there’s no way things will get any better. It’s human to feel that way when we’re overwhelmed. However, we have to make a choice at some point—do we really believe there’s nothing we can do to improve our situation? Or do we believe we can find some answers if we keep asking and looking. If you’re in a tough situation now and don’t see any solutions, here’s the second thing you need to know about dealing with challenges:

You’re not alone

Unless you’re the rare exception, there’s one thing I know—you have people around you who care and who want to help in some way. If you’re used to taking care of others or being the person who doesn’t really need help from others, it’s time to change that. Life is about giving and receiving and to live a balanced life we need to be good at both. If you’re not so great on the receiving end, now is your time to grow in that. Giving is wonderful, but so is receiving—when you learn how.

- Alan Allard, Executive Coach

A Funky New Take on Pumpkin Carving

There’s a lot to love about fall. Cool weather, warm cider, and of course, Halloween. This year while you’re stocking up on candy for trick-or-treaters, why not rethink your pumpkin plans? Instead of the usual triangle-eyed jack-o’-lantern look, take some inspiration from Hugh McMahon and go for something unique and shocking! 

We’ve featured Hugh’s incredible work before, but here are some new delights for this season:

Mad Hatter

Donald Trump

Andy Warhol

New York City