Shannon > Recent Status Updates

Olaf was also Marshal Otto Jefferies. He earned his money as a mercenary and assassin, but his hobby was killing women.

Flip back to page 18

Olaf was scarier than Edward, though, because among the mercenary stuff his hobby was being a serial killer. His victims of choice were petite dark-haired women.

I don't know if you're insulting my intelligence or your own, LKH, by giving the same recap twice.

Warm. Wet. Tight. Nails. I can't hold out. I'm too close. I don't want to hurt you.

Blah, blah, bl--WAIT. What?

The human body above me spilled outward in a rain of thick, hot liquid, and the body between my legs was golden furred with stripes of dark amber. He growled my name. "Anita, what have you done to me?" I ran my hands down the light, dry fur of his arms; it was unbelievably soft. "Brought you home."

I realized that Ethan wasn't dominant enough to push the sex forward. I was going to have to be bolder, or we'd be talking for another hour.

She thinks this, then talks for another three pages, including, but not limited to: whether or not he'll be good at sex, being nervous, what it means to pounce on someone, and whether or not Anita could win at an arm wrestling match against him. I couldn't make this stuff up.

"I have almost a dozen lovers at home, Ethan. If the ardeur binds you to me then you get in line, and Jean-Claude, Nathaniel, Micah, some of the others are always at the head of the line."

O rly? Someone should tell them that, since not ONE of them has even had a single line in this book. I think that was actually the first time Nathaniel's and Micah's names were even mentioned.

He rolled his tongue in small circles at the base of my spine until I shivered for him, and then he plunged his tongue downward, tracing between my cheeks.

What's a little tossed salad, between friends? -_-

Why does she even pretend she doesn't like casual sex anymore? I mean, really?

We were about halfway through the stitches when the local began to wear off. "Painkiller is wearing off," I said.

Now, most people wouldn't get too angry with what I quoted above, but this is just one of the many examples of the editing this book craves. Here, let me fix that for you:

We were about halfway through the stitches when I said, "Painkiller is wearing off."

There, was that so hard?

He stepped on top of the log, not over. When you're in the woods long enough you step on logs, not over, in case of snakes. It just becomes automatic so you can look before you step.

You know, normally I'd read something like that and think, "Huh, I guess that's useful to know," but this kind of shit keeps popping up so randomly that it's pissing me off. She stretches her books over 300 pages with this crap.

What law enforcement officer wouldn't take care of his men? Who in their right mind would let one of his subordinates with a head wound continue to bleed down his face because getting patched up would be "acting like a girl?" Not only is this a lawsuit waiting to happen, but cops take care of their own. These cop characters she keeps introducing really piss me off. She's not even trying to make them real.

You know, I really don't need to know every type and brand of gun and ammo everyone is carrying, how and where they're carrying them, as well as what clothes and armor they're wearing EVERY SINGLE TIME they suit up.

I shrugged, not always the most comfortable thing in the shoulder holster. It made me have to resettle the straps with a shoulder movement that looked like what it was, adjusting a strap on a holster that wasn't quite comfy.

::facepalm:: This should be put in a book entitled: How NOT to Describe an Action

He looked at Edward then, and it wasn't a friendly look. More a guy look, and I wondered if there was just a touch of sexual jealousy there. It wasn't that Raborn wanted to sleep with me, but there is a type of man who feels if a woman is sleeping around he shouldn't be left out. It's almost not personal to the woman; it's just a guy thing.

No, LKH, that's a NOBODY thing. Where does she get this shit from?

"Tilford is in charge of the other warrant, so he's partnering Newman." "I know that Tilford requested that the other warrant go to Ted or me," I said. "Why give the other warrant to a rookie?" Edward asked again. "Especially, why give the senior warrant to a rookie ..." "It's the older warrant ..." "It's the same killers, they're both the same warrant ..."

Edward had gone from fellow marshal to bodyguard head space after last night's "incident." The other police seemed to take it for devotion after the sex they assumed we'd had the night before.

GOD. LKH has such a complex. Nobody cares about this kind of shit in real life. There's a serial killer on the loose, NO ONE CARES if you're having sex. They have higher priorities, like, you know, saving lives.

Ok, so Anita was sleeping in a hotel room with another woman, they both got attacked in the middle of the night and now the other woman is in the hospital. So, they decide Anita should sleep in the same room with Edward and another male cop so she'll be safe. Instead of thinking this is a logical idea, the other guy is throwing a hissy fit because then everyone will think that Anita slept with him. Rational, huh?

"I'm always happy to share information," I said. "Well, aren't you just the center of attention anytime a roomful of men shows up," Raborn said. "Jealous?" I asked. "Of what, the men?" "You're jealous of something. If it's not the men, then what the fuck is it?" "Are you calling me a homosexual?"

I really wonder if LKH has some sort of macro created to insert a Dolph-like cop. This scene is just ... ridiculous.

Has anyone else ever checked out the most popular books among your friends? I was thinking today that my next goal is to read the books that the majority of my friends have that I haven't gotten to yet.

... no blood had gotten on them. But neither of us had gotten to clean off the blood yet. My jammies were blood free, but the rest of me wasn't. I had blood on my legs from the knees down ... Forensic techs had taken samples of the blood ...The blood was drying ...I could feel the blood ... Edited for space, but this all occurs on ONE half-page. 7 "bloods." Yeesh.

Oh, what a wicked ending. Such a fantastically clever and heartwarming tale. I loved loved loved this book.

Oh. OH. That just gave me goosebumps.

Reads it again

>GOOSEBUMPS<

"Shoes are funny beasts. You think they're just clothes, but really, they're alive. They want things. Fancy ones with gems want to go to balls, big boots want to go to work, slippers want to dance. Or sleep. Shoes make the path you're on. Change your shoes, change the path."

"Leef taught me to copy out my own memories onto parchment, to paint a perfect path ... a path back to the things I loved, the things I knew when I was young. That's what a map is, you know. Just a memory. Just a wish to go back home - someday, somehow."

She certainly did not see Death stand on her tip-toes and blow a kiss after her, a kiss that rushed through all the frosted leaves of the autumnal forest but could not quite catch a child running as fast as she could. As all mothers know, children travel faster than kisses. The speed of kisses is, in fact, what Doctor Fallow would call a cosmic constant. The speed of children has no limits.

"God, you're tiny. I bet I can put my hands around that little white-girl waist, and you still have boobs and an ass. That is not fair, girl-friend." She'd taken the I'll-cut-myself-down-and-compliment-you-before-you-beat-me-to-it tack. I had the choices of ignoring it, complimenting her in some way, or agreeing that I looked good without complimenting her back.

Wild guess: LKH doesn't have women friends.

He smiled and it actually reached his eyes; it was a real smile, not Ted's smile, but Edward smiling. I didn't get to see the smile often, so I valued it when I did. I had to smile back. I shook my head, still smiling.

This is an unedited paragraph, word for word from this page.

20 books and we finally know Edward's real name, and I don't even care. He told her because he felt bad that she was crying, and he was trying to cheer her up. I love how Edward's character is one of the few that LKH has stayed true to ... oh, wait ...

Was I really going to cry because Raborn had asked me if I thought I was human? I hoped not.

Turns page

Edward found me leaning against the cleanest part of the alley wall I could find. I was crying, not a lot, but still doing it.

Are you fucking kidding me?

Cool, now new marshal guy is getting Anita to info-dump stuff that's happened over the last 10 books or so, such gems as: who Olaf is, why Anita is called the Executioner, is or isn't Anita human, the vampire marks she carries, and why she hasn't shifted. I read a lot of books and I forget plot points all the time, but these are HUGE ones that you couldn't forget even if you wanted to.

And THERE it is. "Live-in sweeties" has reared its ugly head.

"I'd been told that the only reason you have more executions than anyone else in the preternatural branch is that you're fucking the monsters, so they talk to you, but maybe that's not all of it." Sigh ... really? Why does every single marshal or cop Anita comes across, no matter the city, think like this? Do they subscribe to a newsletter?

"Maybe, but why, or who, and again why?" "Okay, what?" "What do you mean?" "Then what is the problem?" "What?" "So what do I do?" "How do I explain that to the other cops?" I really really REALLY hate how she has the characters explain things to Anita. I know Anita is clueless, but there's a better way to get info to your readers.