Shannon’s Reviews > Hit List > Status Update

I've learned you can fuck this many people, but you can't take care of this many people's emotional needs. You can fuck 'em, but you can't date 'em. Some of the men are happy with being fuck buddies, but most of them want more. People say that women are the romantic sex, but you couldn't prove it by my life. My boyfriends are all more romantic than I am, and so are my lovers.

THAT'S how you end a book. Beautiful.

Ahahahahaha! Olaf! Really? You've got to be shitting me! Seriously? Omg. ROFLOL.

Yaaaaay! You're not even giving me 10 pages, only 3, to wrap everything up. You vile, vile woman.

This whole part is so melodramatic and sappy it's making my teeth hurt.

Only Anita could make decapitations boring.

They got settled over the sleeping vampires. I counted, motioned, and their swords were a shiny blur. Two heads came off and rolled away from the bodies. The third head took a second blow. I stared at Thaddeus, who had needed two blows.
"The angle wasn't perfect," he said.
I said, "I'm with him, you had all the time in the world to set up your angle."

Yaaawwwn.

Lisandro grabbed my arm and spun me around to look at him. "Anita, I'm the muscle, you're the brains. Think of something!"
Oh man, you guys are seriously FUCKED if Anita is the brains of this operation.

I feel like I'm being punk'd. No, really. I have 20 pages left and the ACTUAL PLOT has yet to start. Really. 20 pages. You're going to wrap this up in 20 pages. Someone shoot me now.

Having Olaf die in the line of duty would solve so many problems, but he was a good man in a fight and he was a fellow marshal. I couldn't wish him dead.

ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME? HE'S A SERIAL KILLER. Anita, you are retarded. Not just stupid, but mentally challenged. Oh, he's good in a fight but he likes to kill and rape women who look like me. Let's be best friends forever!

So you don't even need to touch Anita's magical cooch to be ensorcelled anymore: petting her hair will suffice.

So, Anita has been kidnapped, but the one main bad guy leaves the room and her other two captives decide, what the hell, let's release her? There is no tension, nor conflict, nor real danger at all in this book. Except for the water stains. WATCH OUT FOR THE WATER STAINS.