Grant a Wish, Drop a Curse Showing 1,551-1,600 of 2,927

[miscellaneous]

You go ahead. I'm a little busy right now.

[Ted]

granted, but now you're gaining...as we speak

i wish a chix would cook itself for dinner

[miscellaneous]

Hey! Granted, but before the chicken got roasted, he told you to go cluck yourself.

I wish there was no such thing as dust.

[Allerglance]

Granted, but there will be a lot of sand, like a lot... and you're Anakin

I wish I had more will to write

[miscellaneous]

Granted, and may The Force be with you, but all you have to write with are crayons. And NOT the big box.

I wish I could see into the future.

[Ted]

granted, but you can't hear it

i wish dinner would commit harakiri straight into the oven

[Barbara]

Granted but you'll forget to take out the food and it will burn to a crisp.

I wish I was at a gorgeous resort in Hawaii.

[miscellaneous]

Granted, but I'm going with you!

I wish somebody would reset all the clocks to the right time this weekend.

[Ted]

granted, but extra hands snag the seconds & bend the minutes

i wish my kitchen would clean itself

[miscellaneous]

Granted, but your kitchen has a mean streak and threw all of your dirty dishes into your living room.

I wish I had a large coffee with extra cream from Dunkin Donuts right now. And a powdered lemon doughnut. Or two. Definitely two.

[Joyce]

Granted, but you spill your coffee all over the doughnuts.

I wish tomorrow was Saturday again.

[Allerglance]

Granted, but everyday will be called Saturday

I wish I could see different colors.

[Kimberly]

Granted but every color makes your eyes twitch for 5 seconds.

I wish I had a personal hair stylist that made home visits and available anytime needed.

[miscellaneous]

Granted, but when you told her to take a little off the bottom, she took it literally.

I wish I had a Magic Carpet.

[Ted]

granted, but it transforms itself into a broom with a broken stick shift .

i wish i had 6 fingers on each hand

[Allerglance]

Granted, but your extra fingers will always moves simultaneously with one of your fingers

I wish I could levitate and breathe anywhere I want

[Ted]

granted, but you floated to outer space & got sucked into the liquid waste vacuum chamber of a space shuttle

i wish i could go night swimming in the ocean

[miscellaneous]

Granted, but you were kidnapped by the Merpeople, and will be held prisoner until the next high tide, where you will either become their new King, or turned into Seafood Salad.

I wish I was there to see it!

[Ted]

granted, but after that, in the blink of an eye, Mermen had you blindfolded & hogtied & Mermaids + Merkids dipped your feet in a pool full of Garra rufa, where you were forced to endure 3 hours of ticklish fish pedicure

i wish loki would finish thanos in avengers endgame

[miscellaneous]

Granted, if I knew the order of The Avengers.

I wish producers would put a number on their movies. Would it kill anybody to count to three?!

ps I'm really looking forward to that manateeicure.

[Allerglance]

Granted but every movie is a standalone

I wish demons were friendly

[miscellaneous]

Granted, but to keep them in a good mood, you have to invite them over for BBQ every other day, go shopping with them at DemonsRUs , and meet their demon parents, who have no social skills whatsoever and will burn you to a crisp just for using the wrong forked-tongue at dinner.

I wish I find a pot of gold this weekend. Next week would be good too.

[Allerglance]

Granted, but you will have to duke it out with a Leprechaun who's riding a goat, the Leprechaun itself is very fast and has a bit magic bombs to stop you. Btw, he'll come to you and challenge you to eat an entire box of lucky charms WITHOUT the marshmallows, for a pot gold of course.

I wish I had social skills : /

[miscellaneous]

Granted, but you're stuck talking to ME! (heh heh)

I wish I didn't eat so many Lucky Charms. They're magically nauseating.

[Allerglance]

Granted, but now your allergic to it. (FOOL, I make puns within a conversation muhahahahah)

I wish I could have a dreamcatcher

[Ted]

granted, if i were a producer. 1...2... i wouldn't put it to the test

i wish you'd get mantaraycure instead of manateeicure

[Ted]

woops. i seem to have missed the page turn & was replying to teqom's wish from preceding page

granted, but it'll give you good dreams when you're awake

i wish TEQoM would get a mantaraycure instead of a manateeicure

[Ted]

Barbara wrote: "Granted but you'd be have to swim with sharks to administer the cures.

I wish I had some new exercise clothes."


lol

granted, but they're all single-use disposables

i wish i could type faster

[Barbara]

Granted but you'd have calluses the size of ping pong balls on your fingers

I wish I had some Rocky Road ice cream in my freezer.

[Allerglance]

Granted, but there's real rocks in the rocky road and the cream is made of spoiled milk over three decades ago (lol this is from my sister)

I wish you could have better ice cream

[Barbara]

Granted but your friend would get a new job and be too busy to hang out with you.

I wish the potholes around here would get fixed.

[miscellaneous]

Granted, but the potholes were filled with strawberry preserves and you got stuck in a major traffic jam.

I wish Ted could type faster.

[Ted]

granted, but ted's brain could not keep up, thinking at the speed o.ooo.of 0.00001 thought per hour & eventually slowing down to a standstill

i wish teqom could unscramble scrambled words faster

[miscellaneous]

Granted, but the EQofM can only unscramble eggs, and even those are inedible.

I wish I could... change to... had a cook.

[Ted]

granted, but you became a crook as well

i wish my neighbor's out of tune singing would fix the videoke machine

[Allerglance]

Granted, but now you'll always hear their voice every time you go to bed

I wish I could experience winter,

[miscellaneous]

Granted.

[Allerglance]

WWOOOOOOOO TY

I'm frozen

[miscellaneous]

But after a blizzard or two...

[miscellaneous]

I wish we get another blizzard before Spring.

[Allerglance]

Granted but the sun will never appear in the cold sky

I wish I could put myself to sleep more faster

[miscellaneous]

Granted. I shall sing to you a lullabye.

🎶
Just sit right back
And you'll hear a tale
A tale of a fateful trip
That started from this tropic port
Aboard a tiny ship

The mate was a mighty sailing man
The Skipper brave and true
5 passengers set sail that day
For a 3 hour cruise
A 3 hour cruise... 🎶

I wish you were asleep right now.

[Ted]

granted, but your uvula intermittently blocks your airway you can't stop snoring

i wish you wouldn't drool while sleeping

[miscellaneous]

Granted, because I don't have a uvula, so ha!

I wish the morning would come later in the day.

[Allerglance]

Granted, but now the sun awkwardly rises with moon with the day being a total eclipse (Thanks for the lullaby)

I wish to get some pancakes

[Barbara]

Granted, but you won't have any butter or syrup to put on them.

I wish there was a 'Perry Mason' channel that showed all the old shows all the time.

[Joyce]

Granted, but it's in Spanish.

I wish I would stop having such graphic nightmares.

[Ted]

granted, but you start having cryptic dreams instead

i wish it would rain today

[Allerglance]

Granted, but the rain will be stinky

I wish I could morph into animals

[Joyce]

Granted, but you have to eat raw meat to do it.

I wish gasoline prices would come back down.