Dark Comedy Quotes

Quotes tagged as "dark-comedy" Showing 1-19 of 19
Alistair McHarg
“In Chestnut Hill money didn't talk, but it drank, and played a lot of golf.”
Alistair McHarg, Moonlit Tours

Patrick Hamilton
“God help us, God help all of us, each one, every one, all of us'. Patrick Hamilton at the concusion of 'The Slaves of Solitude'.”
Patrick Hamilton

Stanley Kubrick
“[On Dr. Strangelove]: My idea of doing it as a nightmare comedy came in the early weeks of working on the screenplay. [...] What could be more absurd than the very idea of two mega powers willing to wipe out all human life because of an accident, spiced up by political differences that will seem as meaningless to people a hundred years from now as the theological conflicts of the Middle Ages appear to us today?”
Stanley Kubrick

“This isn't where I intended to be. Killing a person has a funny way of getting your life off-track.”
Erin Mitchell

“This isn't where I intended to be. Killing a person has a funny way of getting your life off-track. (Dark City Lights)”
Erin Mitchell

José Eduardo Agualusa
“Monsters, show me the monsters: these people out on the street.

My people.”
José Eduardo Agualusa, A General Theory of Oblivion

Kurt Vonnegut Jr.
“He had no idea that people thought he was clowning. It was Fate, of course, which had costumed him--Fate, and a feeble will to survive.”
Kurt Vonnegut, Slaughterhouse 5: The Children's Crusade A Duty-Dance With Death

Mav Skye
“The image of May shoving the gun down her lace panty butt crack and drawing it like an old west cowboy is too much. Who are we? Who the fuck are we? Supergirls for real, that’s who.”
Mav Skye, Behind the Black Door

Mav Skye
“I snipped the cherries but left the banana.” She gave him a knowing look.
“God,” said Sir Sun.
“No, not God. Me. I did it.” She pointed at herself.”
Mav Skye, Wanted: Single Rose

Warren Moore
“The train hit her with the sound of a meat-filled hefty bag smacking the pavement, and the effect was much the same, I guess. (Dark City Lights)”
Warren Moore

Josh Nealis
“These thoughts only scare me because I'm not afraid of them. I don't want to die. I don't want to kill myself. But I'm not afraid of it.”
Josh Nealis, Stuffed Squirrels & Porcelain Angels

“What’s that supposed to mean, ‘a passin’ hunger?’ I ATE my fuckin’ girlfriend! An’ we ain’t talkin’ little fuckin’ love bites or a bit of a chew—I went wild kingdom on her ass! It was like a pig pickin’ after fuckin’ Lent-FUCK!”
E.V. Iverson

Logan Ryan Smith
“You know that jerk that drives up the shoulder on the freeway, passing perhaps miles of cars stuck patiently in traffic, just knowing someone up there, eventually, will let him in?
It’s the same thing!
Someone always accommodates the pushy, petulant jerk!
Someone always lets that guy with the silver Porsche Boxster in and the rest of us, stuck behind the guy letting him in, have to suffer.
It’s the same with people all over.
It only takes one sucker. One push-over to mess it up for the rest of us.”
Logan Ryan Smith, Y is for Fidelity

Michael Bussa
“Extinguish even the wee annoyance, as it will grow to become evil!”
Michael Bussa

Stewart Stafford
“If anyone at my funeral says 'it's what he would have wanted', I'll kick the lid off my coffin and throttle them. Or, if I've been cremated, I'll flip the lid off the urn and become a dust storm in their eyes. Only you know what you truly want. Anything else is presumption skewed through personal agendas.”
Stewart Stafford

Joe Vallen
“Go make me another pea-butter, witch-of-the-sands!”
Joe Vallen, Unkillable Joe

Joseph Heller
“But what are we going to do?" Colonel Cathcart exclaimed with distress. "The others are all waiting outside."
"Why don't we give him a medal?" Colonel Korn proposed.
"For going around twice? What can we give him a medal for?"
"For goung around twice," Colonel Korn answered with a reflective, self-satisfied smile. "After all, I suppose it did take a lot of courage to go over the target a second time with no other planes around to divert the antiaircraft fire. And he did hit the bridge. You know, that might be the answer—to act boastfully about something we ought to be ashamed of. That's a trick that never seems to fail.”
Joseph Heller, Catch-22

Ian  Kirkpatrick
“Alex tossed the towel onto the counter. “Part on the left or right?” he said. “No middle parts though. Only future serial killer victims part their hair in the middle.”
Ian Kirkpatrick, Dead End Drive

Albert Camus
“A man had left a Czech village to seek his fortune. Twenty-five years later, and now rich, he had returned with a wife and a child. His mother was running a hotel with his sister in the village where he'd been born. In order to surprise them, he had left his wife and child at another hotel and gone to see his mother, who didn't recognize him when he walked in. As a joke, he'd had the idea of taking a room. He had shown off his money. During the night his mother and his sister had beaten him to death with a hammer in order to rob him and had thrown his body in the river. The next morning the wife had come to the hotel and, without knowing it, gave away the traveller's identity. The mother hanged herself. The sister threw herself down a well. I must have read that story a thousand times. On the one hand, it wasn't very likely. On the other, it was perfectly natural. Anyway, I thought the traveller pretty much deserved what he got and that you should never play games.”
Albert Camus, THE STRANGER