Clowns Quotes

Quotes tagged as "clowns" Showing 1-30 of 33
D.J. MacHale
“There are two types of people in this world. People who hate clowns...and clowns. (Bobby Pendragon)”
D. J. MacHale, The Quillan Games

D.J. MacHale
“I hate clowns. I've mentioned that, right?”
D.J. MacHale

Geraldine McCaughrean
“I hate clowns. You can't see what they're thinking.”
Geraldine McCaughrean, Peter Pan in Scarlet

James Howard Kunstler
“The United States is the wealthiest nation in the history of the world, yet its inhabitants are strikingly unhappy. Accordingly, we present to the rest of mankind, on a planet rife with suffering and tragedy, the spectacle of a clown civilization. Sustained on a clown diet rich in sugar and fat, we have developed a clown physiognomy. We dress like clowns. We move about a landscape filled with cartoon buildings in clownmobiles, absorbed in clownish activities. We fill our idle hours enjoying the canned antics of professional clowns... Death, when we acknowledge it, is just another pratfall on the boob tube. Bang! You're dead!”
James Howard Kunstler

Terry Pratchett
“No clowns were funny. That was the whole purpose of a clown. People laughed at clowns, but only out of nervousness. The point of clowns was that, after watching them, anything else that happened seemed enjoyable.”
Terry Pratchett, Men at Arms

“Death's gruesome face taunts:
soulless eyes, crimson grimace.
I really hate clowns.”
Katherine Applegate

Kelly Link
“There was something about clowns that was worse than zombies. (Or maybe something that was the same. When you see a zombie, you want to laugh at first. When you see a clown, most people get a little nervous. There's the pallor and the cakey mortician-style makeup, the shuffling and the untidy hair. But clowns were probably malicious, and they moved fast on those little bicycles and in those little crammed cars. Zombies weren't much of anything. They didn't carry musical instruments and they didn't care whether or not you laughed at them. You always knew what zombies wanted.)”
Kelly Link, The Living Dead

“If you bake a cupcake, the world has one more cupcake. If you become a circus clown, the world has one more squirt of seltzer down someone's pants. But if you win an Olympic gold medal, the world will not have one more Olympic gold medalist. It will just have you instead of someone else.”
Steven E. Landsburg, The Big Questions: Tackling the Problems of Philosophy with Ideas from Mathematics, Economics and Physics

“My family tree spreads wide as well. I am a great ape, and you are a great ape, and so are chimpanzees and orangutans and bonobos, all of us distant and distrustful cousins.

I know this is troubling.

I too find it hard to believe there is a connection across time and space, linking me to a race of ill-mannered clowns.

Chimps. There's no excuse for them.”
Katherine Applegate, The One and Only Ivan

Christopher Hawke
“Life is a great big beautiful three-ring circus. There are those on the floor making their lives among the heads of lions and hoops of fire, and those in the stands, complacent and wowed, their mouths stuffed with popcorn.

I know less now than ever about life, but I do know its size. Life is enormous. Much grander than what we’ve taken for ourselves, so far.

When the show is over and the tent is packed, the elephants, lions and dancing poodles are caged and mounted on trucks to caravan to the next town. The clown’s makeup has worn, and his bright, red smile has been washed down a sink. All that is left is another performance, another tent and set of lights. We rest in the knowledge: the show must go on.

Somewhere, behind our stage curtain, a still, small voice asks why we haven’t yet taken up juggling. My seminars were like this. Only, instead of flipping shiny, black bowling balls or roaring chainsaws through the air, I juggled concepts.

The world is intrinsically tied together. All things march through time at different intervals but move ahead in one fashion or another.

Though we may never understand it, we are all part of something much larger than ourselves—something anchoring us to the spot we have mentally chosen. We sniff out the rules, through spiritual quests and the sciences. And with every new discovery, we grow more confused.

Our inability to connect what seems illogical to unite and to defy logic in our understanding keeps us from enlightenment. The artists and insane tiptoe around such insights, but lack the compassion to hand-feed these concepts to a blind world.

The interconnectedness of all things is not simply a pet phrase. It is a big “T” truth that the wise spend their lives attempting to grasp.”
Christopher Hawke, Unnatural Truth

Terry Pratchett
“They are tragic,' said Vetinari, 'and we laugh at their tragedy as we laugh at our own. The painted grin leers out at us from the darkness, mocking our insane belief in order, logic, status, the reality of reality. The mask knows that we are born on the banana skin that leads only to the open manhole cover of doom, and all we can hope for are the cheers of the crowd.”
Terry Pratchett, Making Money

Jenni Fagan
“Clowns are vicious--they're all nefarious grins--and if you hung out with a bunch of clowns in a bar, pretty soon it would turn into a horror movie. Nefarious means evil. It's nothing to do with Rastas.”
Jenni Fagan

Rupert Thomson
“Did I tell you about Anton?" Loots said.

Anton?" I shook my head.

It was a week ago, Loots said. There had been a knock on the door of his apartment and when he opened it his old friend Anton was standing there. Anton was a clown. He belonged to a circus that toured the provinces, playing to small towns and villages. They talked about the old days for a while, but Anton became increasingly restless and distracted. In the end Loots had to ask him if there was something wrong.

This is going to sound strange." The clown coughed nervously into his fist. "It's The Invisible Man. He's disappeared."

Loots stared at his friend.

He just vanished," Anton said, "into thin air."

The Invisible Man?" Loots said.


He's disappeared?"

I told you it would sound strange," Anton said.”
Rupert Thomson, The Insult
tags: clowns

Dejan Stojanovic
“Statesmen are grocers, ambitious clowns.”
Dejan Stojanovic, The Sun Watches the Sun

“A Dirty Clown Is a Ridiculously Clean when standing amongst Politicians.”
David Corralez

Terry Pratchett
“Across the street, a clown picked up a ladder, turned, knocked the clown behind him into a bucket of water, then turned again to see what the commotion was, thus sending his rising victim into the bucket again with a surprising parping noise. The crowd watched silently. If it were funny, clowns wouldn’t be doing it.”
Terry Pratchett, The Fifth Elephant
tags: clowns

Christopher Lombardo
“With apologies to Judy Garland and Cole Porter, all the world does NOT love a clown. John Wayne Gacy might have been the final nail in the coffin in terms of anyone associating clowns with funny (if a bunch of clowns die, do they all fit into one coffin?)”
Christopher Lombardo, Death by Umbrella! The 100 Weirdest Horror Movie Weapons

Will Elliott
“Remember back in forty-four when someone killed that pet parrot of yours? What was his name, Reynold? You know, the only friend you ever had? That was me, George. I fucked it to death then fed it to Goshy.”
Will Elliott, The Pilo Family Circus
tags: clowns

“A red nose is the clown's mask and my moustache is mine.”
Nuno Roque

Harper Lee
“Clowns are sad, it's folks that laugh at them.”
Harper Lee, To Kill a Mockingbird
tags: clowns

Brian South
“When asked what profession they like least, most people will give the obvious answer: clowns.”
Brian South, The Zombie Sheriff Takes Tucson: A Love Story

Sloane Crosley
“No one likes a clown who reminds them of why they hate ice-cream-truck music.”
Sloane Crosley
tags: clowns

Dayna S. Rubin
“Okay, so we know that someone at your place of work hacked into this laptop. That's what we know, that's all we know; let's not jump to conclusions...yet."
"'s backward...”
Dayna Rubin, A Vetted Asset

“En toen keek ook kleine Quint op van zijn PS. Hij vroeg aan de clowns: 'Weten jullie wanneer eetzuster Gera komt?'
De cliniclowns wisten niet wanneer eetzuster Gera kwam.
'Oh,' zei Quint toen, alsof hij Poetin was, 'ga dan maar weg.”
Edward van de Vendel, Het kankerkampioenschap voor junioren

Caroline Kepnes
“. . . a nightmarish thing that frightens Love, haunting her, weighing her down, the thing that she's supposed to love, the way the world initially instructs children to love clowns even though we all know deep down that they're creepy, old, puffy men in masks leering at children.”
Caroline Kepnes, Hidden Bodies

Thor Benson
“Trump taught us how easily seemingly serious people can become profoundly idiotic. He turned career politicians into circus freaks.”
Thor Benson

Neil Leckman
“Sure everyone thought the 'Clown Shoe' craze was funny until they saw the ants!!”
Neil Leckman
tags: clowns

“I have neighbors who are a bunch of carpooling clowns.
It's fun to watch them all cram into that tiny car each morning!!”
Neil Leckman, Wurms

Rachel Van Dyken
“Parades terrify me,” Max piped up.

Jason nodded in understanding and slid the champagne toward him and Reid.

“Parades?” I couldn’t help but ask. “Really?”

Max shot me a look of terror. “The clowns are allowed out of their tiny cars, Colton. Have you ever even been to a parade? They hand candy and balloons to small children and have permanent smiles on their faces. No one”—he shuddered—“should have a permanent smile.”
Rachel Van Dyken, The Consequence of Loving Colton
tags: clowns

Ronald, remember our deal? Keep feeding me the children. You'll stay rich while I stay
“Ronald, remember our deal? Keep feeding me the children. You'll stay rich while I stay full.”
A.K. Kuykendall

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