Jarod Kintz

in Salt Lake City, The United States
March 05, 1982




Monty Python
Jack Handey
Ted Nancy
Steve Martin
Gary Larson
Mark Twain

This is it, this is my biography. The story of Jarod Kintz begins now.

Lets knock out the trivial first. I was born in Salt Lake City on March 5th. Now that you know my birthday, please feel free to get me birthday presents. Notice how I used the plural, presents? More than one gift would be greatly appreciated. Appropriate gifts include gold coins, bars of silver, and large tracts of land (preferably beachfront property). Or you could just buy me a drinksoda, natural, because I dont drink either alcohol or high fructose corn syrup.

Skipping ahead a few years, and a few hundred miles, we come to Denver, Colorado. For a few years I attended Mackintosh Academy. In the second grade, along with English, I studied French, Spanish, and Japanese.

Jarod Kintz isn't a Goodreads Author (yet), but he does have a blog, so here are some recent posts imported from his feed.

My coffee cup is empty

My coffee cup is empty. Why don't you pour your love in and wake up my soul?

Jarod Kintz (@JarodKintz1) January 3, 2016
22 likes ·   •  0 comments  •  flag
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Published on January 03, 2016 18:41 Tags: coffee, love, soul
Average rating: 3.96 · 947 ratings · 93 reviews · 67 distinct worksSimilar authors
This Book is Not for Sale

3.89 avg rating — 92 ratings — published 2011
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Love quotes for the ages. S...

4.08 avg rating — 83 ratings — published 2011 — 2 editions
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The Mandrake Hotel and Reso...

4.44 avg rating — 68 ratings — published 2013
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I Want

3.92 avg rating — 72 ratings — published 2010
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E-mails from a Madman: namd...

4.09 avg rating — 65 ratings — published 2006 — 2 editions
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It Occurred to Me

3.73 avg rating — 56 ratings — published 2010
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Who Moved My Choose?: An Am...

3.73 avg rating — 33 ratings — published 2011
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This Book Has No Title

3.69 avg rating — 29 ratings
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At even one penny, this boo...

3.47 avg rating — 30 ratings — published 2012
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Six Foot and Some Change: A...

4.33 avg rating — 21 ratings — published 2012 — 3 editions
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More books by Jarod Kintz…

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“I find out a lot about myself by sleeping. Dreams, they are who I am when I’m too tired to be me.”
Jarod Kintz, This Book is Not for Sale

“I want to grow a flower for every time someone tells me “F*** you.” Then I’ll go back to that person and pin the flower on their lapel in a gesture of friendship. And while they are looking down on it in astonishment, I’ll bunch up my knuckles and punch them in the face.”
Jarod Kintz, I Want Two apply for a job at our country's largest funeral home, and then wear a suit and noose to the job interview.

“One of my main regrets in life is giving considerable thought to inconsiderate people.”
Jarod Kintz, This Book is Not for Sale


Which is the most inspirational quote?

"Everybody is a genius. But if you judge a fish by its ability to climb a tree, it will live its whole life believing that is is stupid." Albert Einstein
  32 votes, 49.2%

"Be true to yourself. But that's something everyone says and no one means. No one wants you to be yourself. They want you to be the version of yourself that they like." The Young ElitesMarie Lu
  7 votes, 10.8%

"When you are scared, but do it anyway, that's brave."CoralineNeil Gaiman
  7 votes, 10.8%

"There is evil in everyone. The first step toward loving someone else is to recognize that evil in yourself, so you can forgive them." AllegiantVeronica Roth
  6 votes, 9.2%

"Push through the pain and move on with life."Tiger's QuestColleen Houck
  5 votes, 7.7%

"Unless someone like you cares a whole awful lot, nothing is going to get better. It's not." The LoraxDr. Seuss
  4 votes, 6.2%

"I want to be the kind of person that kind people like and want to be like." Jarod Kintz
  2 votes, 3.1%

"Wounds turn into scars and scars make you tough." Aisha Tyler
  2 votes, 3.1%

"Regrets are only felt by those who do not understand life's purpose." Tiger's VoyageColleen Houck
  0 votes, 0.0%


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