Pat Hatt's Blog, page 97

We Sure Know When We Go!

Cassie is a bit more wiser than I as things catch her eye. Hey, she's done it way more. That is my excuse at our shore. She can tell when it's time to go. But I don't take too long to get in the know.


Cassie knows.No stuff in rows.She's just aware,With one quick stare.
 
See? I learn.We won't return.My cat house is apart.I don't take that to heart.

Into hide mode I go.High, not low.Can't reach me. But you can still see.

Can't now.I don't meow.I have the dark.Here I will park.

 I'd rather stay,Then deal with the other bay.A basket case is just what I need.There they grow like a weed.

A scaredy cat.I like that.Can chase her away,Any old day.
 
The box cat.Who needs that?I can pack him up though.Mail away another foe.

The bouncer kitty.He's not in a city.That is where he needs to go.So see ya later to another foe.

The fluff ball.Chase him down the hall.He can be a duster.After all the dusting he looses his luster.

And then there's the poser.What a brown noser. But if he gets too close to me,On him I'll do number 2 with glee.
I guess I have a way of thinning out the pack. I just need to go on the attack. Do you have foes to stop? Have such a big crop? The mutts I'll have to work on next time. Dealing with those butt sniffers is just a crime. At least I took care of one furry mass. They won't be bothering my little rhyming ass.

Enjoy your winter, smash a printer.

A Friendly Face To Embrace?

The cat was out and about the other day and he heard a nut having their say. Or rather Pat heard it. But the cat is going to take the hit. What was it? Why some friendly shit.

You need to smile.
Smile a whole mile.
You need a friendly face.
You don't have one to embrace.

A face is a face.
You can't retrace.
But friendly yours is not.
So join the friendly lot.

Like that guy.
He's spry.
A friendly face.
All want to be in his space.

So smile like that.
Don't let your face fall flat.
Smile and have a friendly face,
Or you'll be fired from the rat race.

That's not it.
Looks like shit.
Smile like you mean it.
Take the hit.

Bah, you can't do it.
You look like you are having a fit.
You'll scare others away.
You have a scary display.

Go back to work.
Don't be a jerk.
Practice some more,
There at your shore.

Be happy tomorrow.
Don't bring the sorrow.
You aren't happy I say.
Look at that frown on display.

That's not your face.
It is not the case.
That is you lying.
So keep on trying.

Just look at her.
Happy with a purr.
Have a face like that.
Now get back to work, stat.

I actually heard an employee at the grocery store getting grossed out for not having a friendly face encore. Then they said a friendly face and pointed at me. If only they knew at my sea. Ever asked to change your face? No wonder there is a plastic embrace. Such idiot managers near and far. Maybe should flatten his face with a car. See, I'm not so friendly with my sass. I'd rather be a little rhyming ass.

Enjoy your winter, smash a printer.

Just Ducky With Horse Pucky!

Or should I say shit because people on the internet are sure full of it. At least some that is with their so called that and this biz. But don't believe the cat. Just get a whiff of this scat.

Drinking your own pee cures...
My, thinking that gets purrs.
It cures everything under the sun.
Yeah, and the cat is a nun.

Africa is a country all itself.
Damn, Santa better inform an elf.
He needs to know such things.
Maybe his reindeer really have wings.

Super super secret thingys galore.
They are at every shore.
Weight, lottery, health, even a date.
Oh, how they all sure have a common trait.

Dead people aren't dead.
Elvis still has his head.
He's alive like many an other.
I think I just saw the world's oldest guy's mother.

A quote on a photo is true.
That is too much work to go through.
No one would fake that.
They don't want to chew fake fat.

A world ending thingy is upon us.
Everyone should kick up a fuss.
The Mayans and Y2K were soo right.
Listen to this new one taking flight.

Some rich guy will give you dough.
Yep, Bill Gates is in the know.
He'll just shell out some cash.
Go now, make a quick dash.

Stats are ever so true.
Every one you see at your zoo.
98% of readers who know nothing about it tell me so.
So it has to be true, you know.

A phone update will make it waterproof.
Nah, it is not a goof.
A little update is all it takes.
Use it in water after the phone shakes.

I'm a time traveler back from the future.
Came back to get a suture.
The future is so bleak.
The world only has one creek.

Now do you see that many are full of it? Who can believe such umm spit? But it still gets spread around a ton. At least they provide the cat with some fun. Nuts sure are everywhere and many more there are with an internet lair. Fall for any that have come to pass? They can all bite my little rhyming ass.

Enjoy your winter, smash a printer.

Holy Cow That Is Wow!

The cat doesn't get impressed much. I guess I'm out of touch. Or maybe I'm just a cat. We think everything is beneath us and scat. But after seeing this commercial 1000 times at the other sea, we are so impressed we have to share with thee.

Wowweeee, it's a site.
A site taking you through the night.
It is so damn great.
You can use it and relate.

Which site is that?
Won't be named by the cat.
No free PR.
Hardy har har.

Look, you're related to Sam.
That is so great, damn.
Sam who though?
Beats me at my show.

Hitler is a relative of yours.
Might want to avoid tours.
But isn't that great to know?
Nah, who wants to sink that low.

You're related to beer.
Wow, wasn't that fun to hear?
Maybe you are just a drinker.
Could be you're a free thinker.

Einstein is your relative too.
That gets a whoa hoo.
But you're not smart?
Damn, enjoy Wal-Mart.

You're related to an ape.
An ape with a cape.
We have it on tape.
Brain of a grape?

You're related to Timbuktu.
Yep, it is so very true.
Related to all in the place.
So many relatives to embrace.

You're related to the King.
That must impress at your wing.
Elvis is great after all.
Too bad your relative is the king of some mall.

The best of all.
You can stand tall.
Santa Claus is related to you.
Believe it because it's true.

Who cares I must ask? Woweeee, a famous relative found as you lift the mask. Does that make you any better or worse at your sea? Nope, so it won't impress me. Just like the whole relative rhyme, the cat just gives a meh chime. You are you, whether you have famous or crap relatives at your zoo. The cat is all done with his sass. But enjoy such sites says my little rhyming ass.

Enjoy your winter, smash a printer.

Crossing Over With Rover?

The rage today is crossovers at play. They are everywhere you look. Even Batman and Ninja Turtles fell for the hook. Everything goes that way. So why not my bay?

A rhyming wiener.
Hmmm that could be cleaner.
As in wiener dog.
Don't go into a brain fog.

It's Ninja Wannabe Time.
Proved the ninja wannabe can rhyme.
But would his clones do it?
They may not like that shit.

It's Neko Time.
Facts are sublime.
Facts in their prime.
Even some on a mime.

My Rhyme Men.
Might be an interesting den.
Betsy does have five.
Would they survive?

Marg's Rhyme Time.
Donkeys giving a rhyming chime.
That would be neat.
Cats may not find it sweet.

Keepin It Rhyme Folks.
Might give some strokes.
Pimples and rhyme,
Shown in their prime.

It's Mail4Time.
Is that a crime?
I won't send you mail.
So that one may fail.

It's Mix Nuts Time.
Halloween Nazi may demand a dime.
She could show some nuts.
That may put people in ruts.

It's Penwasser Time.
Captain Caption in his prime.
Sitting on the loo,
And rhyming too.

Wanna Rhyme A Duck.
Wow, we're in luck.
No whelmed will pass the buck.
Can go for gold with...fluck.

Any more crossovers you want? Don't you want to crossover with my haunt? Could be a lot of fun. Or we could just scare everyone. The cat is good at that. I am just crazy as can be where we are at. We could crossover in mass. That would be fine by my little rhyming ass.

Enjoy your winter, smash a printer.

City Or Town Which Makes You Frown!

We've done house or apartment a while ago, now let's see which way this wind will blow. Which is your foe? Which one sinks more low?

City or town?
Does one make you frown?
Should country be used?
Country and town for this are infused.

Country has a town.
Many could take the crown.
If you count country as a whole.
Not as green grass where you stroll.

Which is for you?
Much coming due?
Lots to be done.
Around to stores you can run.

Traffic galore.
Suck on gas at your shore.
Not to mention the smog,
As you go out to walk your dog.

But can get what you want.
Nothing will haunt.
Can usually find it with ease,
Whenever you please.

Although more crime,
May not be sublime.
Could get shot.
That may hurt a lot.

Where as the town,
No traffic will make you frown.
Can get to where you need to go,
10 times faster you know.

Maybe 5 times.
But there are no mimes.
Quiet as well.
For some that could be hell.

But then less work,
That isn't a perk.
Then again more people in the city,
So can't even get a job out of pity.

Which is for you?
Fast, smoggy and things that are new?
Or slow, clean air and same old thing?
Maybe in the middle you have a fling.

Got a preference at your sea? Both have their perks for me. Sometimes depends where you are in life too. Tried out both at your zoo? Can be quite the difference indeed. Towns are cheaper, usually, to live in at ones feed. But then many are dying out in mass. You were made to think today by my little rhyming ass.

Enjoy your winter, smash a printer.

Drop By On The Fly!

Just drop on by the It's Rhyme Time. You'll only have to pay a dime. A dime times ten thousand or so. Other than that you'll positively glow. Why is that? There is lots of scat.

Guys Making A Bed.
Wow, that beats club med.
Wouldn't you love that show?
I bet it would glow.

Vacuum Cleaner Wars.
People will want tours.
Those sets will be so grand
You'd want to touch them with your hand.

Who's Got The Greener Grass.
You can watch and sit on your ass.
What a way to spend your time.
I think I'd rather watch a mime.

Look What My Dust Bunny Did.
Viewers will flip their lid.
It will be such a hit show.
That I surely know.

Things That Float.
You'll sure take note.
That will catch every eye.
Look! It's a floating french fry.

Empty Plate Guessing.
Nope, I'm not messing.
It will be that good.
Guess what was eaten at your hood.

Adventures In Floor Waxing.
That show will be so taxing.
You'll watch it with your tongue out.
It is one all will talk about.

Cat Hair Wig Making.
That is a course you'll be taking.
After of course you watch the show.
All will stoop that low.

How To Make A Hole.
A hole is their goal.
A hole in the wall or ground.
Fans everywhere will be found.

Clouds In The Sky.
Watch as they fly by.
It will be clouds 24/7.
People will be in hippie heaven.

Don't they all sound grand? Wouldn't they be great for TV land? If you say yes there is no hope for you. You heard it here first at my zoo. Are reality shows just getting more dumb? Damn, they are pathetic and then some. I bet some would watch wars over green grass. That is just sad to my little rhyming ass.

Enjoy your winter, smash a printer.

A Written Return That Will Churn!

This rhyme came due but I can't show you. Why is that? Just because where I'm at. This rhyme came due but I can't show you. It was another one. Damn, doesn't want to be spun.

Was that a hole?
Damn, not a goal.
Can't have that.
It has to scat.

Hole is fixed.
It has been nixed.
But that word doesn't work.
It just isn't a perk.

Swap out the word.
No longer absurd.
Another hole there.
Not good to have a spare.

Hole's been plugged.
Things aren't bugged.
It goes out straight.
It can leave the gate.

Whoops, a rhyming dog.
That lands us in a bog.
We can't have that.
Need a rewrite, stat.

Start all over.
Get rid of the rover.
He has quite the stink.
That could bring one to the brink.

Have to change that.
From dog to cat.
Look another hole.
Three more take stroll.

Words don't fit.
Need to fix that shit.
It's repeat land.
Those words take a stand.

Repeat the fix.
Repeats to nix.
Repeats done.
Repeated a ton.

Fixed with a cat.
How about that?
Whoops, the cat doesn't rhyme.
Have to rewrite one more time.

Ever get into rewrite land? Thankfully no rhymes get out of hand. I can do those in my sleep. But rewrites can run deep. Plot holes galore or something doesn't work and needs an encore. All kinds of reasons for them to come to pass. It's good that no one can rewrite my little rhyming ass.

Enjoy your winter, smash a printer.

What Type Are You At Your Zoo?

There are bloggers of all types here and there and I can figure out the types at my lair. Are you able to? I guess we shall see if most of these you knew.

What type of blogger are you?
Why do you blog the things you do?
Today the cat will share with you,
The many that come due.

Are you the looky loo,
Wanting many a view?
Letting all know when you cried.
Stats matter to your pride.

Are you the poor poor me,
Going on a pitiful spree?
Trying for sympathy from all,
With each and every post call.

Are you a fun in the sun,
Giving what you want a run?
Not caring what others think,
As out your thoughts sink.

Are you an all about me,
Who never goes to another sea?
Thinking all should come to you,
Pretending you don't have a clue.

Are you a blog connector,
Hopping over many a sector?
Finding friends far and wide,
Having many by your side.

Are you a promoter,
Ads running your motor?
Always selling this and that.
Trying to make your wallet fat.

Are you a neglector,
Always being a varying detector?
Popping in once a year.
Having nothing to say with your cheer. 

Are you a mix and match,
A bit of a blogging batch?
Doing that and this,
Everything giving you bliss?

What type of blogger are you,
Why do you blog the things you do.
Did the cat hit on you?
Has your blog habit come into view?

That was just fun to do as the idea popped in at my zoo. Did the cat hit on one? Maybe a mix and match with your blogging run? The cat just does it for some fun and enjoys hopping around to everyone. But that you knew at your zoo. At least I hope you knew that in mass. I can be a confusing little rhyming ass.

Enjoy your winter, smash a printer.

It's Not Hard So Pull A Card!

The cat has a game for you. It is going to sell a ton at my zoo. I just know you'll all want to play. It's the Rhyme Time Card Game on display.

Pull a card.
It's isn't hard.
There is a pile,
Don't wait awhile.

Cassie Death Glare.
Whoops, that is rare.
You lost already.
That card stares steady.

Rhyming Ass!
A rhyme must come to pass.
The first to stop rhyming has lost.
Don't stop at any cost.

Drazin Third Person Eyes.
My, doesn't he look wise?
You have to talk in the third person.
If you stop, your points worsen.

Tarsier Man Theme.
Now comes a live stream.
You must sing your theme song.
Sing or it is all wrong.

Search Engine Nut.
Don't just sit on your butt.
Type the weirdest thing ever in Google.
The winner is the one who gets the best oogle.

Nicknames R You.
Nickname your crew.
The one with the best of the bunch,
Gets a free lunch.

Stupid Human Things.
Give your best rings.
The one with the stupidest human trait,
Adds points to their crate.

Cat Hair Galore.
Rip some hair out at your shore.
It can be from anywhere on you.
Then put it where cat hair might come due.

The Tail Card.
This may be hard.
Find the nearest thing at your sea,
And make it a tail on thee. 

Those are just some of the cards at play. Don't you want to play at your bay? Are you jealous the cat has a card game? It will be anything but tame. Things may get a bit crazy and maybe even hazy. You may even get to pass some gas. That is a perk for my little rhyming ass.

Enjoy your winter, smash a printer.