Dave Barry's Blog, page 4023

FLORIDA WILDLIFE ENCOUNTERS

You don't even have to leave home. (Thanks to Allen at Division)

WE ASSUME THEY BURPED THE BABY AFTERWARD

A Norwegian church used lemon-flavoured cola instead of water in a baptism ceremony after its taps were temporarily turned off because of freezing temperatures, daily Vaart Land said on Tuesday. "Vaart Land?" (Thanks to Horace LaBadie)

SNUGGIE PUB CRAWL UPDATE

Looks like it was very stupid a lot of fun. (Thanks to Ralph)

HEY, AS LONG AS EVERYBODY INVOLVED WAS CONSENTING

(Thanks to DavCat)

HAR

(Thanks to Steve Merryman)

BUT THAT'S THE WHOLE POINT

Man on motorized barstool charged with DUI (Thanks to DavCat and Chuck Cody)

24

Here is where we stand: Last week Jack managed to steal the Deadly Fatal Bioweapon of Death from henchpersons working for evil puppetmaster Jon Voight. Unfortunately, the henchpersons got it back by shooting 153,000 rounds of ammunition at Jack from...

YOU HAVE TO DRAW THE LINE SOMEWHERE

A McDonald's drive-through was shot up early Sunday after a customer was angered that the restaurant had shifted from the lunch menu to the breakfast menu, police said. (Thanks to Horace LaBadie and Siouxie)

THEY COULD HAVE JUST ASKED ANY RANDOM GUY

A judge has ruled that pole dancing is art. (Thanks to John Regan and Chris Lawson, both of whom are guys)

FAMILY FRACAS OF THE WEEK SO FAR

(Thanks to blunt hobo)