Dave Barry's Blog, page 4009

CSI: CADDO PARISH

(Thanks to DavCat)

THERE IS NOTHING LOWER

Some heartless bastard has stolen Gordo the skateboarding parrot. (Thanks to David in Oz)

CSI: ATHENS GA

Clue #1: The two walked to the Days Inn on North Finley Street, where she was "raring to go," the man told the officer. (Thanks to Allen at Division)

WE SAY LET HIM GO. JUST DON'T LET HIM COME BACK.

Former Gov. Rod Blagojevich hoping to appear on reality show But the indicted ex-chief executive needs permission from federal authorities to go to Costa Rica for taping of 'I'm a Celebrity ... Get Me Out of Here' (Thanks to Shari...

DOWN, BOY

'Our dog ate my G-string' (Thanks to Ralph) Update: Good thing the G-string didn't belong to this woman. (Thanks to Siouxie)

A GOING CONCERN

Deep S**t Cattle Co. (Thanks to Siouxie and catmanmax)

WHAT MAKES IT EVEN WEIRDER IS THAT HER WALLS ARE COVERED WITH YOGURT

BEIJING, April 12 -- A woman got sick after she ate a container of yogurt that turned out to be a sample bottle filled with paint. (Thanks to Martini Shark)

YOUR OREGON LEGISLATURE UPDATE

Ew. This has been Your Oregon Legislature Update. (Thanks to Janice Gelb)

CREEPING FASCISM IN RATCLIFF-ON-SOAR, NOTTS

Now we see what happens when the police take away a man's fundamental human right to protect his property with a giant dung-flinging catapult. (Thanks to Horace LaBadie and Ralph)

SPACE NODE BUDDY UPDATE

Buddy didn't win. But he didn't totally lose, either. (Thanks to many people)