Dave Barry's Blog, page 3948

JACK NICHOLSON WAS COURTSIDE

World Stinging Nettle Eating Championship attracts record crowd (Thanks to Matt Filar, Jonathan Carl, DavCat and Horace LaBadie)

THOSE TERRORIST BASTARDS

Now they're using carrots. (Thanks to Chris Lawson and Siouxie)

WE HOPE THIS MAN NEVER ATTEMPTS TO UMPIRE IN MIAMI

Umpire ejects entire crowd during baseball game (Thanks to Steve [The Other Steve:] Lancaster and nursecindy)

FATHER'S DAY IS COMING

And we guarantee you that Dad does not want this. (Thanks to Chuck Cody)

HUMAN RIGHTS UPDATE

Deceased Albanians still eligible to vote (Thanks to Ross Marks, who notes that this has long been official policy in Florida) And yes, "Deceased Albanians" would be a good name for a rock band.

POSSIBLE CAREER OPPORTUNITY

The New York Times has a story today about a man who rents himself out to bars and parties as a human carpet: He took his act professional a few years ago and now mostly appears for a fee —...

WE DON'T WANT TO THINK ABOUT WHAT GOES ON DURING THE SCRUM

Naked rugby. (Thanks to and Bill Moore and Horace LaBadie) Vaguely Related Item: Police in Dunedin have confiscated a French rugby fan's rooster. The story does not say whether it is a naked rooster. But we are confident that there...

THEY WON'T GET FAR WITHOUT MILK

Thieves steal Sugar Puffs (Thanks to Jeff Meyerson)

WHY YOU NEED YOUR BIG BROTHER WITH YOU AT YOUR WEDDING

You need him to remind you not to proceed down the aisle until you have removed the tag from the sleeve of your new wedding suit.

ARE THEY INSANE?

Curiously, the study did not take into account bust sizes. (Thanks to Allen at Division)