Dave Barry's Blog, page 3914

July 20, 2009

I NOW PRONOUNCE YOU STATISICALLY IMPROBABLE

A woman named Kelly Hildebrandt is getting married to a man named Kelly Hildebrandt. And vice versa. (Thanks to Allen at Division)
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Published on July 20, 2009 07:38

YOU ARE NOW FREE TO FREAK OUT IN THE CABIN

An Indianapolis-bound Southwest Airline passenger was stung early Sunday by a venomous scorpion stowed away in his carry-on luggage. (Thanks to Allen at Division)
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Published on July 20, 2009 06:37

THIS IS UNNECESSARY IN MIAMI, AS THE PASSENGERS WOULD ALREADY HAVE GUNS

A Chinese bus company is equipping its vehicles with bricks for passengers to use to break windows in an emergency. (Thanks to Jeff Meyerson)
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Published on July 20, 2009 06:34

YOU WANT CHIPS WITH THAT?

(Thanks to Ralph)
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Published on July 20, 2009 06:31

PEOPLE OF JAPAN:

Stay out of the water. (Thanks to Bill Hudgins and CJrun)
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Published on July 20, 2009 06:19

SOMEHOW, TOILETS KNOW WHEN IT'S SUNDAY

This is true even in space. (Thanks to jon harris)
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Published on July 20, 2009 05:50

CONTEMPORARY ART IN BOULDER

About 25 women at the Boulder Museum of Contemporary Art learned about these traditions Saturday and removed their shirts for their own liberating experience. (Thanks to Sue Jenkins)
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Published on July 20, 2009 05:48

July 19, 2009

FRANK McCOURT

He's gone. Hard to believe. He was a brilliant man -- a wondrous combination of literary skill, honesty, humor and the occasional burst of pure heavenly bullshit. In other words, an Irishman. Frank was also (and this is surely the...
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Published on July 19, 2009 17:33

INSTEAD THEY'RE GOING TO HIRE A CLOWN

The Treasury Department revealed Friday that it is scrapping plans to hire a cartoonist to lighten the mood of its employees who manage the nation's $1 trillion-plus debt, after a key Democratic senator questioned the wisdom of the hiring. (Thanks...
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Published on July 19, 2009 07:20

WE CAN TOTALLY RELATE

Rosario "did intentionally set his car on fire in front of his residence simply because he hated the car," a police report said. (Thanks to Jenny Kellner)
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Published on July 19, 2009 07:14