Amy Mah's Blog, page 51
March 13, 2011
Cute little Vampire girls being bitten.. Amy Mah Vampire
Cute little Vampire girls being bitten
I never know when I start writing what will turn up on the page so lets start…………..
May as well get down to basics today ……….something ……basic……. Well…
I was just chatting to a cute little vamp on FangBook today and she was complaining that her master hurts when he bites her.
So I told her to stop complaining as he is only showing his love to you …..And it is very normal for a male to get a little carried away as they are not too bright when it comes to romance and foreplay …………..
You in turn must also show you care for him ………..the best way is for him to be able to remember you when he is away from the nest so he should always have something personal of yours with him ………….. perhaps some old panties you were just putting our to wash ………put these in the top pocket of his suit ..Instead of a handkerchief …….so at meeting when he take it out he will remember you …
And as you remember his loving bites it goes without saying you should always piss in and over all his shoes, that way it should bring back to him happy memories of biting you the night before.
No of course he won't mind as you are only showing him you care, and if he cares for you then he will not mind others knowing you have marked him.
If he does complain then it may mean the he does not wish other females to know he has been marked …………….. He may even try and clean your scent off ……this is rude of him, yes! Extremely rude !………
………… in which case you are in your rights to remark him ………..I suggest with something heavy and possibly made of lead …………… the normal time for this is just as he is dropping off to sleep …………….. this can be done several times during the night or over several night.
I find the nights best to do this are the ones when you are visiting your parents ………….
As your loving Male can see how fond your parents are of each other ……and how they make such a fine marriage……….. the funny little comments your Daddy makes over dinner……………….. Always the same but still funny …………… "If you ever make my little girl unhappy I will rip your balls off and then force you to eat them!"………..
Ho how we all laugh at that …………… along with how he staked my first boyfriend …..for putting his hand up my skirt……… hehehe ………….. And my cousin with the roving hands has never walked the same after Daddy had a little word with him…………… and he also does quite well having just one arm…..ho I do so love visiting my folks……….
If you like my writing take a look at my book: .Fangs Rule
If you like my writing take a look at my book: .Fangs Rule http://www.fangsrule.com
I never know when I start writing what will turn up on the page so lets start…………..
May as well get down to basics today ……….something ……basic……. Well…
I was just chatting to a cute little vamp on FangBook today and she was complaining that her master hurts when he bites her.
So I told her to stop complaining as he is only showing his love to you …..And it is very normal for a male to get a little carried away as they are not too bright when it comes to romance and foreplay …………..
You in turn must also show you care for him ………..the best way is for him to be able to remember you when he is away from the nest so he should always have something personal of yours with him ………….. perhaps some old panties you were just putting our to wash ………put these in the top pocket of his suit ..Instead of a handkerchief …….so at meeting when he take it out he will remember you …
And as you remember his loving bites it goes without saying you should always piss in and over all his shoes, that way it should bring back to him happy memories of biting you the night before.
No of course he won't mind as you are only showing him you care, and if he cares for you then he will not mind others knowing you have marked him.
If he does complain then it may mean the he does not wish other females to know he has been marked …………….. He may even try and clean your scent off ……this is rude of him, yes! Extremely rude !………
………… in which case you are in your rights to remark him ………..I suggest with something heavy and possibly made of lead …………… the normal time for this is just as he is dropping off to sleep …………….. this can be done several times during the night or over several night.
I find the nights best to do this are the ones when you are visiting your parents ………….
As your loving Male can see how fond your parents are of each other ……and how they make such a fine marriage……….. the funny little comments your Daddy makes over dinner……………….. Always the same but still funny …………… "If you ever make my little girl unhappy I will rip your balls off and then force you to eat them!"………..
Ho how we all laugh at that …………… along with how he staked my first boyfriend …..for putting his hand up my skirt……… hehehe ………….. And my cousin with the roving hands has never walked the same after Daddy had a little word with him…………… and he also does quite well having just one arm…..ho I do so love visiting my folks……….
If you like my writing take a look at my book: .Fangs Rule
If you like my writing take a look at my book: .Fangs Rule http://www.fangsrule.com
March 12, 2011
Waking up Naked in strange bed with a Hangover and no memory of how you got there.
Waking up Naked in strange bed with a Hangover and no memory of how you got there.
Bed and sleeping with people is always a problem and as I always say Sleeping with another girl does not always mean you are a lesbian sometimes it just means the central heating needs fixing.
So back to waking up naked in strange bed with a hangover and no memory of how you got there, every drinking girls nightmare, along with the worry of were you left your clothes.
So you slowly open your eyes and painfully look around a strange room which from the décor shouts rather too loudly of cheap motel …….and the way your head feel it says it far too laud even if it whispered it.
A cheap nylon sheet is covering you …….er ………..and that is all you have covering you ………. A fur coat would have been nice …….shut up …….you don't mind who I kill and eat but you object to me liking fur ….huh………….you humans are so odd if I said a human corpse covering you would not have cared !!!
Is it all that is covering you …er…yes you check twice and a single piece of coloured cord around ones wrist does not count! Supporting the local cat's home is very charitable but does not count as clothing.
So what happens next?
1. A man leaves some money on the bed side table as he puts on his trousers and leaves …………
Action: ……….you scream ……………. What just $20 !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
2. You turn to one side and see a naked man and two naked female fashion models in bed with you
Action: Roll over and go back to sleep you are ether in some guys dream or if real with the fashion models in bed with you than you know your honour is quite safe.
3. There is Eric the vampire from true blood in next to you in bed
Action: ………….. Pounce on him ….he is not going to get away again!
4. You notice the room is empty apart from a pile of female clothes which are not yours.
Action :………. ….You know that no matter how short the skirt is you will go without underwear today as there is just no way you are ever going to put on another persons used underwear!
5. You look down and see you are now a guy You have changed sex during the night !!!! And then you hear a female voice near by asked how was it for you and shall we do it again?.
Action:……………. Hope whatever the new extra bits you have know what they are going to do with out you having to order an owner's manual from Amazon, but then as you stare at what is between your legs and now you more fear that the bigger problem will be trying to fit back into the micro dress you had on last night
6. You look down and you are still female but you hear a female voice near by asked how was it for you and shall we do it again.
Action: ……………. Telling her you have a headache only works on guys so you look on the bright side no matter what went on its now too late and turn to her thinking at least you won't get pregnant.
7. You look down at your hand and discover a gold band on your wedding finger and snoring coming from someone near you in bed.
Action………………. Panic ! all you can remember are day glow cocktails with strange names like oblivion and something so pretty that it could not be alcoholic………. You can only remember talking to two people last night 1. a long distant truck driver who got his tattoos while in jail and 2. the bartender you are really praying it is the bartender next to you and then you remember the bartender was female and remembering the tattoos still pray it is the bartender!
8. You look around the empty room and remember that you booked yourself in last night just after being sick over the guy you fancied and you did not even remember eating peas. But he refused to take you home so you crashed here.
Action:……………….You pray to all the gods you know thanking them for the pounding head and the feeling of still wanting to be sick as it could have been far worse!
Guess what I have just had my first book interview ……. Weeeeeeeeeeeee have I told you before ……….. well tough I am telling you again it is by blog !
Here is the link …….so take a look:
http://www.eeriedigest.com/wordpress/2011/03/interview-with-author-amy-mah/
My book is now on sale please click below to see details:
http://www.fangsrule.com/buy.htm
Bed and sleeping with people is always a problem and as I always say Sleeping with another girl does not always mean you are a lesbian sometimes it just means the central heating needs fixing.
So back to waking up naked in strange bed with a hangover and no memory of how you got there, every drinking girls nightmare, along with the worry of were you left your clothes.
So you slowly open your eyes and painfully look around a strange room which from the décor shouts rather too loudly of cheap motel …….and the way your head feel it says it far too laud even if it whispered it.
A cheap nylon sheet is covering you …….er ………..and that is all you have covering you ………. A fur coat would have been nice …….shut up …….you don't mind who I kill and eat but you object to me liking fur ….huh………….you humans are so odd if I said a human corpse covering you would not have cared !!!
Is it all that is covering you …er…yes you check twice and a single piece of coloured cord around ones wrist does not count! Supporting the local cat's home is very charitable but does not count as clothing.
So what happens next?
1. A man leaves some money on the bed side table as he puts on his trousers and leaves …………
Action: ……….you scream ……………. What just $20 !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
2. You turn to one side and see a naked man and two naked female fashion models in bed with you
Action: Roll over and go back to sleep you are ether in some guys dream or if real with the fashion models in bed with you than you know your honour is quite safe.
3. There is Eric the vampire from true blood in next to you in bed
Action: ………….. Pounce on him ….he is not going to get away again!
4. You notice the room is empty apart from a pile of female clothes which are not yours.
Action :………. ….You know that no matter how short the skirt is you will go without underwear today as there is just no way you are ever going to put on another persons used underwear!
5. You look down and see you are now a guy You have changed sex during the night !!!! And then you hear a female voice near by asked how was it for you and shall we do it again?.
Action:……………. Hope whatever the new extra bits you have know what they are going to do with out you having to order an owner's manual from Amazon, but then as you stare at what is between your legs and now you more fear that the bigger problem will be trying to fit back into the micro dress you had on last night
6. You look down and you are still female but you hear a female voice near by asked how was it for you and shall we do it again.
Action: ……………. Telling her you have a headache only works on guys so you look on the bright side no matter what went on its now too late and turn to her thinking at least you won't get pregnant.
7. You look down at your hand and discover a gold band on your wedding finger and snoring coming from someone near you in bed.
Action………………. Panic ! all you can remember are day glow cocktails with strange names like oblivion and something so pretty that it could not be alcoholic………. You can only remember talking to two people last night 1. a long distant truck driver who got his tattoos while in jail and 2. the bartender you are really praying it is the bartender next to you and then you remember the bartender was female and remembering the tattoos still pray it is the bartender!
8. You look around the empty room and remember that you booked yourself in last night just after being sick over the guy you fancied and you did not even remember eating peas. But he refused to take you home so you crashed here.
Action:……………….You pray to all the gods you know thanking them for the pounding head and the feeling of still wanting to be sick as it could have been far worse!
Guess what I have just had my first book interview ……. Weeeeeeeeeeeee have I told you before ……….. well tough I am telling you again it is by blog !
Here is the link …….so take a look:
http://www.eeriedigest.com/wordpress/2011/03/interview-with-author-amy-mah/
My book is now on sale please click below to see details:
http://www.fangsrule.com/buy.htm
March 9, 2011
Sex er cise how to keep your body in prefect readiness for that special night out
Sex er cise how to keep your body in prefect readiness for that special night out
Now as you may know we Vamps have our own website ……… well it stops us having to talk with the food ……….. well it is off putting ……… you trying chatting to a cow then order a nice juicy steak ……………..
Anyway ……………. What happens on our sites like FangBook and Fangpages ….mostly what happens on your human sites …….I'm a girl so the usual question is will you send me a pic of your boobs…………. Ok ok ……..it is not always like that sometimes it is ……………I LOVE YOU !!!!! so will you please send me a photo of your boobs …………….
I blame breast feeding myself ….yes I do ……..something like that must have done something to a guys mind ………….
And as to questions guy ask like ……..…What are your boobs like?................ just how is that a question to ask a girl………. so to answer the question once and for all ……….
I have two ……….they are on my chest and mounted in the traditional horizontal way as they are side by side …………… and unless it is cold they do very little on their own …….. Surprisingly I can go for hours at the time forgetting they are even there.
My girlfriends all tell me this is very normal and they get the same questions and requests for photos………..
So my little story for to day which links to the video click at the bottom of the page …….yes….yes…yes………ho god yes……… you must see it…………… a new training program to lose weight in a very ..very..very …sexy way !!!!!!!!!!!
Going back to fangbook when guys show interest in me I normally ask them to prove it and this one guy did……..!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!.......... he sent me a photo of his best feature…………. HMG …….I am still blushing ……….. must be twice the size of any normal guy !!!!!! …………not that I am an expert you understand………. No please do not get me wrong size does not mater to a girl ………it is personality .er………a caring heart ………..or in my case a very large bank balance along with uncontrollable urges to give me expensive jewelry ………….
But when I told my girlfriends and they all demanded to see it ……………….. er…...only for interest you understand ………….that's all ………….. ok………. And I was correct from the …………… sighs ……and screams……… and other exclamations which I wont go into here…………. It was bigger than any of them had ever seen before ……….not that - that interests any girl you understand……….. but heck…………..he should now discover a sudden influx of girls asking to be his friend on Fangbook ……well he also has one hell of a cute butt………
Yes as a guy he has some of the largest FANGS I have even seen ………….. any girl would be happy if their boyfriend was so gifted in the fang department……
http://www.break.com/index/jimmy-kimmels-hottie-body-workout-2013856
…….yes….yes…yes………ho god yes……… you must see this lose weight in a very ..very..very …sexy way !!!!!!!!!!!
http://vampirekiss1967.blogspot.com/
Before I forget anyone that has promised to do a book review, please contact my publisher Reardon Publishing: email: Reardon@bigfoot.com and check it you are on the mailing list
http://www.fangsrule.com/
March 5, 2011
A Vampire naked sex chat line……… .yes …nude ….starkers……bare…. unclothed
A Vampire naked sex chat line……… .yes …nude ….starkers……bare…. unclothed
I was chatting away to a friend on FB today (yes Rechelle it was you) saying that I was naked and just going to take a shower……..yes I do chat in the nude.......... soooooooooo well why not?………….. and no I don't have a video cam ……pervert!!!!
And I got to thinking ……………. Yes I can do that in the shower ………. It is called multi tasking ………. Now will you stop thinking of my naked body all covered in soap and pay attention ……… ok!
I need to make some money to publicize my book and well why not do a vampire sex line? ……….. Well it would be different …………. Other female vampires give out cards offering bondage and biting services ………….. Yes human males pay to be tied up and bitten ………perverts yes but perverts with money…….. …. So it goes down on the health insurance as special medical needs………..and now don't you every say anything about me just chatting in the nude……..
So how about it a vampire sex line………..can't be hard to do as long as you don't mind the heavy breathing ……….
Er………one ..problem ….er……..like no one has ever told me what a sex line does? …………. Well I am not going to phone one up and ask am I !!!!!
So a customer phones my vampire sex line:
What do I talk about? ………….. er……..yes I am a vampire now please pay an extra 10 dollars per question…………… and as to questions like please touch your boobs for me………. Er……...why ………. Like I have had them since puberty and well the novelty kind of wears off after a few years …………. And unless it is cold they don't do really do much on their own……………..
OK back to the customer………. What am I wearing ………er………ok another $10 ……………… a pair of very brief very sexy red panties with a little cute bow on the front in pink……………. What else? ……..well they are on special offer at the moment from Wal-Mart at 9.99 a pack of three………a real bargain……. But you have to wash them separately as the colour comes out …………… and like everything in the wash like comes out pink ……………..
Too much information …er…….sorry ok but I am new ok at this………………..I have a big thick sweat shirt with bats on? ….er..not interested ..ok….. they are pink bats!....still not interested …er………..
Drinks yes ok drinks……..i am drinking ……… and it is in a sexy way ………… the mug ever has a pink bat on it…………… why a mug? …….well it is hot chocolate and it also has a bat on it………..and the bat changes colour depending if the drink is hot or cold……….can't you tell from the way I have a ring of chocolate around my lips ……..er……………yes …….no …….video cam ….sorry.
No video cam ………..Well then you won't worry about the face mask I have on then will you…………. Er……….it a grey face mask …...well apart from where the chocolate has stained around my lips…..
What's my body look like you ask?……….er…….well kinda normal …….. You know boobs and such like ….hell didn't you do biology at school? ………. Don't you remember the picture in first grade biology……………. No the hairy one was a cartoon of Darwin…………….. well it is similar..er.ish ………hell if you are old enough to phone a sex line you are old enough to just do a google search on a female body without spending $10 asking me!
Ermmmmm? What ?..........sorry I was not listening ……….well I was just answering an email ……….yes it was important ! …………. If you must know the cat had 4 kittens three black and one ginger ………… no I don't know how come one was ginger …
………. Good god what the hell do you what me to tell you about the sex life of cats for just £10 a question!
Yes my voice does sound odd when I shout…..…….well I have a stinking cold………. And well it is now dripping ………….which is your fault as if you had not phoned me I would have gone out and got some tissues……………..
Yes thank you ………….I am sure it will get better soon…………….. I just wish my stomach would………hmg I never going to touch shell fish again …….hell ........two days now and I have only just got off the toilet ……….
Hello ….hello ……………. ?
Now where did he go? ………and he had at least 5 dollars of credit left …..you humans are so odd……………
March 2, 2011
February 26, 2011
Sex and the female vampire …………. No matter what species you are a relationship with the opposite sex is always a problem …………….
Sex and the female vampire …………. No matter what species you are a relationship with the opposite sex is always a problem …………….
I know it is my fault …..sigh…….. but then again it is always my fault ………….. I am just waiting for someone to blame me for the increase in oil prices ……. So before anyone says anything ………yes I am sorry it is my fault petrol is going up in price………….. ok happy now?
Now if I was a lesbian life would be easier …well I would know what everything did……… er ….ok I would know what ……….. most things did on a female body ………….. and heck if I did not then I could practice on my own in advance …………….. sigh ……. But no I am a good girl ……….and good girls do not do such things or your teeth will all drop out ……..er…..never did understand that ………..but so much stuff from my childhood is the reason why I am like I am….and yes I still have all my own teeth so that proves I am a good clean leaving vampire girl and have fangs to prove it……………
Ok so it was not all my fault …….he was also to blame …………….. I believe in having a nice romantic date with a guy …….all normal stuff when out with a guy he has to be er…well ………er………. Tall , Rich and Hung like a Horse.. ……… see just the normal stuff that any girl would want for a date.
And a date means …..Chocolates …….Flowers …and a very Expensive Meal ………………it does not mean waving something in front of my face and then complain when I bite it! ……………I can still hear the screams now ………..well I was hungry and as I said chocolate ………..Flowers and a very Expensive Meal first………..then perhaps I would just and taken a look and burst out laughing ……….. Well I not a doctor why the heck show me in the first place unless it is for amusement. …next time he could just tell a joke …………. And besides when you date a vampire and her tummy begins to make noises ……..it means Chocolates …….Flowers …and a very Expensive Meal ……………and very quickly or expect to be the first course on the menu !!!
Relationships are always a problem …….sigh……………..
I know it is my fault …..sigh…….. but then again it is always my fault ………….. I am just waiting for someone to blame me for the increase in oil prices ……. So before anyone says anything ………yes I am sorry it is my fault petrol is going up in price………….. ok happy now?
Now if I was a lesbian life would be easier …well I would know what everything did……… er ….ok I would know what ……….. most things did on a female body ………….. and heck if I did not then I could practice on my own in advance …………….. sigh ……. But no I am a good girl ……….and good girls do not do such things or your teeth will all drop out ……..er…..never did understand that ………..but so much stuff from my childhood is the reason why I am like I am….and yes I still have all my own teeth so that proves I am a good clean leaving vampire girl and have fangs to prove it……………
Ok so it was not all my fault …….he was also to blame …………….. I believe in having a nice romantic date with a guy …….all normal stuff when out with a guy he has to be er…well ………er………. Tall , Rich and Hung like a Horse.. ……… see just the normal stuff that any girl would want for a date.
And a date means …..Chocolates …….Flowers …and a very Expensive Meal ………………it does not mean waving something in front of my face and then complain when I bite it! ……………I can still hear the screams now ………..well I was hungry and as I said chocolate ………..Flowers and a very Expensive Meal first………..then perhaps I would just and taken a look and burst out laughing ……….. Well I not a doctor why the heck show me in the first place unless it is for amusement. …next time he could just tell a joke …………. And besides when you date a vampire and her tummy begins to make noises ……..it means Chocolates …….Flowers …and a very Expensive Meal ……………and very quickly or expect to be the first course on the menu !!!
Relationships are always a problem …….sigh……………..
February 20, 2011
As a Vampire I did not plan to find lifting up your skirt to everyone is normal!
As a Vampire I did not plan to find lifting up your skirt to everyone is normal!
Being a vampire is not always as fun as it sounds as we have to mix with humans and you are so odd !!!!
As a vampire I have problems with sunlight and over the next few weeks I will tell you of my trip to Asia to see my human relatives the ones which brought me up as an orphan until I was discovered and taken back into vampire society, hundreds of relatives I never heard of which seams to be normal in Asia.
I do not burst into flame but get terminal acne ………….. well …..it feels terminal it may not kill me just wish I was dead, and even with 1000 percent sun block cream and dark glasses I still suffer.
Asia is hot and sunny and not a good place during the day for my species ………….. I am good with overcast days in the West but still I am not a full day walker and so I suffer………….. but I will tell you more over the next few weeks as I tried to pretend to be human and fit into your world.
So a nice cool night flight and then it hit me …………….. sun light !!!!!!!
…As I said I suffer from heat rash due to being a vampire or in my case monstrous heat bumps …….heat lumps ….. see as a vampire I can not take sun light 3 on my left foot and two on my right a mountain of one on my lower right leg.
And the worst on my right inner thigh one that was 1 inch dia and itched like hell another 3 inches dia of puffy skin around it from me scratching.
And I was now a guinea pig for testing herbal creams by unknown relatives……………… hell I am not used to lifting my skirt for every strange distant relative to take a look at it and rub something on it such as…………. Tiger Balm ….which burns then itches again leaving you with a now big brown itchy lump.
Now you know why I said I always feel like a child in both vampire society and human society ……………. Who else do you know would have to raise their skirt to let a person one has never seen before …….. and without a doctors degree look up your skirt and make comments………….. Hell ok they say they are a relative …. But ………..oh embarrassing and ………. Well ……..there is me thinking daily that that I must wear my best underwear and perhaps should iron them first ………. as I do not know who will want to look up my skirt today !!!!
You humans do not and I repeat do not live a normal LIFE !!!!!
Being a vampire is not always as fun as it sounds as we have to mix with humans and you are so odd !!!!
As a vampire I have problems with sunlight and over the next few weeks I will tell you of my trip to Asia to see my human relatives the ones which brought me up as an orphan until I was discovered and taken back into vampire society, hundreds of relatives I never heard of which seams to be normal in Asia.
I do not burst into flame but get terminal acne ………….. well …..it feels terminal it may not kill me just wish I was dead, and even with 1000 percent sun block cream and dark glasses I still suffer.
Asia is hot and sunny and not a good place during the day for my species ………….. I am good with overcast days in the West but still I am not a full day walker and so I suffer………….. but I will tell you more over the next few weeks as I tried to pretend to be human and fit into your world.
So a nice cool night flight and then it hit me …………….. sun light !!!!!!!
…As I said I suffer from heat rash due to being a vampire or in my case monstrous heat bumps …….heat lumps ….. see as a vampire I can not take sun light 3 on my left foot and two on my right a mountain of one on my lower right leg.
And the worst on my right inner thigh one that was 1 inch dia and itched like hell another 3 inches dia of puffy skin around it from me scratching.
And I was now a guinea pig for testing herbal creams by unknown relatives……………… hell I am not used to lifting my skirt for every strange distant relative to take a look at it and rub something on it such as…………. Tiger Balm ….which burns then itches again leaving you with a now big brown itchy lump.
Now you know why I said I always feel like a child in both vampire society and human society ……………. Who else do you know would have to raise their skirt to let a person one has never seen before …….. and without a doctors degree look up your skirt and make comments………….. Hell ok they say they are a relative …. But ………..oh embarrassing and ………. Well ……..there is me thinking daily that that I must wear my best underwear and perhaps should iron them first ………. as I do not know who will want to look up my skirt today !!!!
You humans do not and I repeat do not live a normal LIFE !!!!!
February 19, 2011
Bras that give you BIG BOOBS !!!!!!!!
Bras and Boobs
Ok what is it? Why am I getting these adverts sent to me?
These have just popped up on my facebook page adverts section and it seams Facebook is saying ……………..
…………… Amy Mah is in need of help in the boob dept !
Well thank you for your concern facebook advertising dept but no, I am quite happy with what I have, they may not win any size records, but hell they are real and natural looking !!!!!
OK so I don't fall over every time I stand up but they are fine………….so they would be it you did not keep sending me these adverts and making me so self conscious !
CLICK BELOW FOR MORE
My book trailer :::::::::::::::
Bras and Boobs
Bras and Boobs
Ok what is it? Why am I getting these adverts sent to me?
These have just popped up on my facebook page adverts section and it seams Facebook is saying ……………..
…………… Amy Mah is in need of help in the boob dept !
Well thank you for your concern facebook advertising dept but no, I am quite happy with what I have, they may not win any size records, but hell they are real and natural looking !!!!!
OK so I don't fall over every time I stand up but they are fine………….so they would be it you did not keep sending me these adverts and making me so self conscious !
CLICK BELOW FOR MORE
http://www.brastick.com/index.php?country=MY&a=001&b=stick
http://www.brastick.com/index.php?country=MY&a=001&b=stick
February 9, 2011
Girls should tell guys that Size does matter
Girls should tell guys that Size does matter
We vampire girls are similar to human girls in that when looking for a life time mate we go for the standard normal things that girl would want:
1….. Rich
2……Hung like a horse
3……Good Teeth
Wealth? ………. Well we are long lived and once married we will never work again yet we still expect to be covered in gold and gems……………so he needs to be rich or we will have to kill him and move on.
As to size …………….. lol …………. We almost wet ourselves when we hear human girls lie to human guys when they tell them size does not matter!!!!
Of course size matters! ………….. if he is not well endowered then your girlfriends will laugh at you …..and your parents will worry that you are turning into a lesbian!
Yes a male vampire with small fangs is a pitiable sight and normally gets killed for having girly teeth! Imagine having children by a male with fangs not at least 50% larger than yours ………….. yuk ………. People will think you are perverted! Or something is wrong with you that you could not catch a real male………. Besides that your family will disown you!.................
……………Er …………
………..When I was talking about males and size you thought I was talking about his boy dangly bits didn't you? ………..you have such dirty minds and besides I already said he had to be hung like a horse didn't I?
