Todd Perelmuter's Blog, page 29

Does Universe Understand Negation as if in Mantras?

Q: Dear Todd, Does universe know a negation or a negative? If you say it does the universe hears the opposite? I really get so confused sometimes with all the spiritual understanding.

TODD ANSWERS: That’s a great question. Negation only happens when there is suppression or repression of a concept. For example, don’t think of a monkey. The mantra, “I do not need to be perfect, I do not need a perfect life”, is simply to deeply understand the concept that we don’t need a perfect life. There is nothing we are trying to suppress here.

Another famous mantra used in India is, “I am not my body, I am not even my mind.” It has the word “not,” but nothing is being suppressed, so it works.

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Accountability to Immoral Things You Did Before You Awakened?

Q: Dear Todd, if you did immoral things before you were awakened to the universal truths will you be held accountable for those things in this life or future lives?

TODD ANSWERS: Is a tiger responsible for killing a gazelle? I don’t think so. I think it is a creature living out its own nature based on its past karma/cause-and-effect. When we act with unawareness, we are not in control. Only with presence can we make conscious choices.

However, what I have found in my own life whenever I have had guilt or regret, is that it pays to pay it forward. I like to go above and beyond for someone else whenever I fall short. It can be as simple as leaving an extra large tip at a restaurant, helping someone in need, or even better, making it up to the person I wronged if that option is available. For me, this is how we can truly create a new cause-and-effect. To me, karma is this very real and measurable chain of events that we can trace if we are attuned to it.

Another thing I have observed that creates more good karma is to meditate or do some spiritual practice that nourishes my capacity for compassion, patience, generosity and goodwill. This too creates countless more positive ripples in the world.

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I Get Emotionally Abused Whenever I Date. What to Do?

Q: Dear Todd, I have an inferiority complex. Every time I date, I just end up being emotionally abused by my partner.

TODD ANSWERS: Inferiority in dating is so common, you probably regularly date people who also feel inferior. We’re all insecure to some degree. It’s totally normal and healthy to have a healthy degree of self-skepticism. If I never doubted myself, I’d probably have worn my Superman cape to school well into high school.

And remember, just because someone seems confident, that is often masking an inferiority complex. So it can be expressed in different ways. An abusive person is often insecure. Napoleon had an inferiority complex (famously called a Napolean Complex for being short), and he failed trying to take over the world to prove what a big man he was.

So, long story short, why spend one minute focusing on yourself at all, and instead focus on the other person. Are they kind? Are they comfortable in their skin? Or do they need to put others down to feel better? When your awareness shifts to them, self-doubt, self-consciousness, and self-everything else disappears. I have made a few videos and podcasts on dating, inferiority complex, and insecurity, I hope they help.

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The post I Get Emotionally Abused Whenever I Date. What to Do? appeared first on EastWesticism.

Path to Peace How to Stop Excessive Unnecessary Thinking

Our society today values thinking above being. We are encouraged ever since preschool to always be thinking. While human thinking and intellect are the greatest tools for survival on our planet, if that thinking isn't infused with presence, wisdom, and conscious intention, it will lead to every single problem humans have created throughout our history.

It's no wonder most people have a deeply ingrained habit of incessant thinking. We don't need to shut off our brain though. We just need balance. There is an epidemic of overthinking going on right now. It prevents humans from truly connecting. It is responsible for every grudge we can't let go of, for every unmindful moment, and for every mental illness. In today's podcast, I talk about how we can restore that balance as I answer the following questions:

Why do minds talk all the time in the background?Is there a way out of the destructive loop of horrible thoughts, fears and grievances?What can I do when these thoughts start racing uncontrollably in the night?Is it even possible to stop our minds from self-talk?How can I stop overthinking every little thing from my life and even others' lives?Is there a way to calm the voice inside?How can I handle intrusive thoughts?

Please enjoy other episodes where I share meditation techniques, tips and spiritual lessons from around the world for peaceful and stress-free living. Remember to subscribe to stay up-to-date.

*****
Path to Peace with Todd Perelmuter is proud to be supported by the nonprofit, Village Direct. Empowering women and indigenous communities by bringing spiritual, sustainable fashion to the world. Get your responsibly sourced, handmade clothing and accessories, and support a great cause, at http://www.villagedirect.org

Like what I do and want to SUPPORT what I am doing?
Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/ToddPerel
Buy Me a Coffee: https://www.buymeacoffee.com/toddperel

Find all of my BOOKS for wherever you are on your spiritual journey : https://www.eastwesticism.org/spiritual-meditation-books/

Want to gift a book to a prisoner? Click here.

The post Path to Peace How to Stop Excessive Unnecessary Thinking appeared first on EastWesticism.

How to Use Mindfulness to Manage Emotions

Q: Dear Todd, how can we use mindfulness to manage emotions?

TODD ANSWERS: It’s as simple as observing reality as it really is instead of fixating on the story our mind tells us about what is happening or how things should be.

Throughout your day, take as many conscious, deep, slow breaths as you possibly can. Use each breath as an opportunity to become present and mindful of the here and now. The more breaths are taken, the more mindfulness and presence enters our life. And, soon mindfulness becomes second nature. And this simple practice will help you in managing your emotions throughout the day.

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How to Respond to People Who Hurt Us

Q: Dear Todd, shouldn’t we respond with our true feelings to people who hurt us and not with love and kindness?

TODD ANSWERS: Someone recently asked me this question about how to respond to people who hurt us. I get it, believe me. Our first (unconscious) instinctual reaction is to respond with anger. But this would be a reaction that lacks wisdom, patience, perspective, and most importantly, efficacy. It is just not effective when communicating to respond with anger. People’s walls go up and they dig even deeper into their positions.

So how can we see the error of that small thinking? How can we step back and see the bigger picture? How can we respond most effectively? To do this, we need to maintain our composure so we can see the situation as it truly is and how best to proceed. By not losing ourselves in rage, and through a little careful analysis, we can see there is never any need to be angry, there is no need to hate, and there is no benefit to conflict.

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Path to Peace How to Achieve Mindful Success

Some people think spirituality and business don't mix. But I have noticed time and time again that when people become spiritual, they become more successful. Whether it's Ray Dalio, billionaire CEO and investor who discovered the benefits of meditation, or Elon Musk who infuses his Neuralink and SpaceX enterprises with the mission of expanding human consciousness, spiritual human endeavors often produce the greatest value. Not just for our wallets either, but for our mind, body, spirit and community.

In today's podcast, I talk about how mindfulness helps us become more successful through mindfulness, how to run a mindful business, and how to be spiritual and rich at the same time. I share how mindfulness can help us escape the clutches of poverty, let go of pessimism and fear, and make more mindful choices that lead to success not just in our business, but in our families, friendships, and personal growth.

Please enjoy other episodes where I share meditation techniques, tips and spiritual lessons from around the world for peaceful and stress-free living. Remember to subscribe to stay up-to-date.

*****
Path to Peace with Todd Perelmuter is proud to be supported by the nonprofit, Village Direct. Empowering women and indigenous communities by bringing spiritual, sustainable fashion to the world. Get your responsibly sourced, handmade clothing and accessories, and support a great cause, at http://www.villagedirect.org

Like what I do and want to SUPPORT what I am doing?
Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/ToddPerel
Buy Me a Coffee: https://www.buymeacoffee.com/toddperel

Find all of my BOOKS for wherever you are on your spiritual journey : https://www.eastwesticism.org/spiritual-meditation-books/

Want to gift a book to a prisoner? Click here.

The post Path to Peace How to Achieve Mindful Success appeared first on EastWesticism.

Can I Reach Enlightenment If I Have Family?

Q: Dear Todd, if we have family, friends, and relationships can we also reach Enlightenment/Self-Realization? Can we have both?

TODD ANSWERS: There is no doubt that it is easier to meditate all day when we live in a monastery. But, while meditation is essential for understanding the mind and the nature of consciousness, that’s not all there is to reaching our ultimate potential. We humans forget that we are spiritual beings, but we also like to forget that we are animals. We have innate social drivers and a desire to procreate. We don’t just crave food and water, we crave companionship and community too.

So for me, these close, loving, messy relationships are spiritual practices. They expand my patience even further than meditation alone. They are where I put my love and compassion into practice. Obstacles make us stronger. Challenges make us grow. So for me, my life may be more peaceful in a monastery, but it is more meaningful and exciting working and having relationships. It’s a personal choice at the end of the day, but I think we thrive wherever we follow our heart.

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When Your Child Gets Bullied

Q: Dear Todd, what about bullying especially as a child? My daughter has a great beautiful heart, but over 4 years now she is bullied and it has changed her really. Do we have something inside that makes such things happen on the outside? I am quite desperate to learn how to handle all that and hope for impulses also from the spirit world cause I learned the most happened for a reason.

TODD ANSWERS: There is nothing she did or projected to attract a cruelty that shouldn’t even exist. There are many studies that show that kids who have spirituality are much happier, have less mental health issues and even do better in schools. This can be mindfulness for kids, meditative games and activities, meditation even and even just open conversations about death, life and meaning.

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Be the Real You, Don’t Change to Impress Others

When I was a kid, I didn’t always fit in. Growing up in Louisville, KY — a real college sports town — my artsy, peace-loving, and authority-questioning traits weren’t always welcomed. For example, in 7th grade I got suspended because on my school’s Community Service Day they made us rake the school playground.

Well, I realized that this was a private school and the playground was on private property and that we weren’t really serving the community, we were serving the school. So, I just stood there with the rake in my hand, silently and peacefully protesting.

As the science teacher, who really lacked a sense of humor, came walking toward me to tell me to start raking, I dropped the rake and started running in circles around the playground evading him. I won, or so I thought, until I was later told by the principal that I was suspended for disrespecting a teacher. I didn’t even know that was a thing (I was not always the wisest kid )

I decided high school would be different. I studied up on the sports teams and players, watched enough games to learn how the commentators spoke, and had all the right sports team apparel. I did it! I was at the cool kids’ lunch table, every now and then chiming in to repeat what someone else had just said in a slightly different way, like a child trying to fake it through a book report.

I kept up the charade of a sports fan until my first day of art college. People there didn’t even know what a football was. I finally found my place, but I lost a decade. I lost the chance to make genuine friendships, deep connections, and I missed out on discovering my true self (something I talk a lot about in my book, Finding Your True Self: A Love Story).

When we are inauthentic, trying to craft a persona 24/7, we become lost in our heads. We cannot clearly hear or see or connect with what is happening around us. Getting out of our head isn’t about living with our head in the clouds, it’s about finding peace in the here and now. When we listen to ourself, honor ourself, and live in alignment with our highest intentions, life becomes effortless and doubt falls away. More on this here. 

In the week ahead, let your loving, creative, freak flag fly. Be extra you. Dance alone. Dance with someone. Laugh, have fun, be silly. The world needs it more than ever. Really do something so silly you laugh out loud.

It’s easy to say, “Be happy,” but it’s a lot harder to do. So what can we do? I talk more about that in this video. One thing that happens so often is that we get lost on our quest for happiness. I explain where we go wrong, why we get lost, and how we can get back on the right track in this video.)

Much love,

Todd

PS – Throughout various stages of life, nearly all of us will face some kind of abandonment, neglect, separation or avoidance by someone we care about. In my latest podcast episode, I provide some tools to heal from abandonment trauma.

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