Todd Perelmuter's Blog, page 25
March 6, 2024
Peace of Connectedness vs Anxiety of Survival
Q: Dear Todd, I am having a hard time separating myself, my body, and my needs for water, food, safety, shelter, etc.. from the lower order of constituents we’re made from. For example, I can see the peace of connectedness but at a higher level the anxiety of survival.
TODD ANSWERS: It’s very natural for these thoughts to arrive as the thinking mind’s job is survival but we can use those thoughts for motivation, inspiration, and creativity to achieve more or they can use us and bring us down. If we accept them, use them, and even embrace them, then the fear and anxiety go away.
Let the wisdom of ashrams, monasteries and shamans from around the world get delivered right to your inbox.
Please leave this field empty.
The post Peace of Connectedness vs Anxiety of Survival appeared first on EastWesticism.
March 3, 2024
I Always Want People I Can’t Have. How Do I Deal With It?
Ah yes, the age old ritual of courtship. Feigning disinterest, playing it cool but charming, all to entice a potential. The beautiful mating dance of two humans seeking connection.
Objectively and logically speaking, we have three options.
I believe it tends to be preferential to adhere to options two and three.
Option two means that we make sure we’re not too closeminded. It means really considering what we’re looking for, what’s a dealbreaker, and what’s something you could live with. It means making sure we ask ourselves if our idea of a mate is really ours, or is it our family’s or society’s. Are the things we think we want really important? Have we thought of everything that is really important in a long term committed relationship?
Option three means we take a loving look at ourselves. Are we selling ourselves short? Are we suffering from low confidence? How could we present ourselves in a more positive light? Usually that means being more present. When you exude an energy as though everyone wants to date you, all of your dates will try to impress you and win you over, instead of the other way around. So assume that everyone loves you, that you’re a bad ass, and become the chooser. No one deserves self love more than you. No one in the dating world is better than anyone else, just a better fit for some than others. So keep searching and enjoy the journey.
Path to Peace With Todd Perelmuter NewsletterLet the wisdom of ashrams, monasteries and shamans from around the world get delivered right to your inbox.
Please leave this field empty. The post I Always Want People I Can’t Have. How Do I Deal With It? appeared first on EastWesticism.
March 1, 2024
Is It Bad to Avoid People Who Are Mean And Hurtful?
Q: Dear Todd, is it bad to avoid people who are mean and hurtful rather than to spend time with them?
TODD ANSWERS: I think of it the way I think of art. I deeply love all art because it comes from a place of wishing to make the world a more beautiful place. However, I can’t hang every piece of art in my house, so I have to be a little choosier.
We can love everyone, and forgive everyone, but we don’t have to give our precious time to every single person on earth.
Get Peace & Calm DeliveredReceive the tools and insights for living a life free from fear, negativity and stress.
Please leave this field empty. The post Is It Bad to Avoid People Who Are Mean And Hurtful? appeared first on EastWesticism.
February 29, 2024
Path to Peace How to Handle Betrayal Trauma
Unless you live under a rock, you have probably experienced some kind of betrayal trauma. It is the most prevalent kind of trauma known to man and practically universal. Someone at some time in your life has broken your trust, not cared for you the way you deserved, abused or taken advantage of you. It's part of being human.
But no matter what we've been through, we all have the ability to heal. We can all overcome our past, learn from it, and leave it in the past where it belongs. In today's podcast episode, I share 3 ways to do that so we can rediscover the perfect and peaceful present moment.
Please enjoy other episodes where I share meditation techniques, tips and spiritual lessons from around the world for peaceful and stress-free living. Remember to subscribe to stay up-to-date.
*****
If you ever feel like my words brought a change in your life, and want to show your SUPPORT for what I am doing, click here.
Find all of my BOOKS for wherever you are on your spiritual journey : https://www.eastwesticism.org/spiritual-meditation-books/
Want to gift a book to a prisoner? Go here.
Path to Peace with Todd Perelmuter is proud to be supported by the nonprofit, Village Direct dedicated to bringing isolated villages' expert artistry directly to you.
The post Path to Peace How to Handle Betrayal Trauma appeared first on EastWesticism.
February 25, 2024
Anger Management Tips: Learn to Calm Yourself
To work on oneself, to admit our flaws, to face them head on and to overcome them takes the greatest courage there is.
We only yell out and act out in rage because we have lost ourselves and our composure. Because we fail to know how to use our words to communicate clearly.
In meditation and mindfulness, we can remain at peace, we can think clearly, and can communicate effectively.
Tip 1) Respond With Strength And CompassionQ: Dear Todd, The challenge or difficulty I face with anger is of a different kind. I very rarely allow myself to vocalize my anger; instead, I seethe internally. However, this poses a problem as I struggle to release the anger, feeling as if I lack an outlet.
Todd Answers: We definitely need some time to destress and it can look like meditation, alone time, anywhere you can sneak in some peace and quiet. Infuse that anger with love and you will be able to tell anybody anything that needs to be said calmly, compassionately and yet firmly.
Tip 2) Bring Presence And Awareness to Your EmotionsQ: Dear Todd, in the midst of strong emotions, like real, raw anger, I literally forget everything and am not able to control my temper. What can I do to fight that?
Todd Answers: It takes time to develop any new habit, but every single time you can bring just a second of presence and awareness to that emotion, you are slowly developing that new habitual reaction of calm.
One thing you can try to do when you are sitting alone and have some time is to close your eyes and think of a situation in the past or a potential situation in the future that you know will trigger those heavy emotions and visualize how you wish to respond.
Think about that trigger to the point where you can’t help but visualize yourself overreacting, and then sit with it until you find a way to react calmly. Think, “How can I react in the most effective and beneficial way possible?” Let me know how that works for you and go easy on yourself.
Tip 3) Don’t Resist the Emotions, Witness ThemQ: Dear Todd, What could we do when somebody makes us angry and makes us want to react the way they do?
Todd Answers: When someone engages in hurtful behavior, we do our best to witness the painful emotions within us arising, witness our thoughts, and not resist them or be angry with them. Just observe and accept them.
Then, as the present witness, we can remain calm and present, and through clarity rather than anger, we can see the best path forward. Hurtful situations don’t need to cause us hurt when we can see the big picture in these small moments. We can respond with strength and compassion. Over time, every act of kindness we take will help lead to a kinder world.
Tip 4) Practice MindfulnessQ: Dear Todd, my problem is that my anger just pops out suddenly; I am as surprised as anyone around. It’s as if I have seething rage inside me that I mostly keep covered, but I have no control over it. I am grateful that I’ve never had children because, although I don’t have rage attacks very often, I have no control over their appearances.
Todd Answers: That is very common and it’s incredibly wonderful that you have become aware of some of those unconscious thoughts. The more we practice mindfulness and being present, the less we can get carried away by our emotions.
Receive the tools and insights for living a life free from fear, negativity and stress.
Please leave this field empty. The post Anger Management Tips: Learn to Calm Yourself appeared first on EastWesticism.
February 23, 2024
Path to Peace How to Play the Game of Life
When we embark upon our path to peace, we frequently find ourselves at a fork in the road. One way, is safe, easy, familiar and has the allure of peacefulness. The other way is scary, unknown, adventurous and requires great courage. One way seeks outer peace, but the other way creates inner peace.
When our inner peace is dependent on external circumstances, we will have a chaotic life. When we can face any challenge with peace and courage, the world is ours.
In today's podcast, I talk about how life we can find peace in the chaos. I share how having a big, daring, bold life can lead to true and lasting peace. And I discuss how we can face and conquer those demons of doubt and fear.
Please enjoy other episodes where I share meditation techniques, tips and spiritual lessons from around the world for peaceful and stress-free living. Remember to subscribe to stay up-to-date.
*****
If you ever feel like my words brought a change in your life, and want to show your SUPPORT for what I am doing, click here.
Find all of my BOOKS for wherever you are on your spiritual journey : https://www.eastwesticism.org/spiritual-meditation-books/
Want to gift a book to a prisoner? Go here.
Path to Peace with Todd Perelmuter is proud to be supported by the nonprofit, Village Direct dedicated to bringing isolated villages' expert artistry directly to you.
The post Path to Peace How to Play the Game of Life appeared first on EastWesticism.
February 22, 2024
When the Negative Nelly is a Colleague You Can’t Ignore
Q: Dear Todd, what about when you work with a negative nelly? I ignore her, I don’t validate her, but yet she cannot enjoy peace and quiet – she HAS to fill the silence with her ailments and as much as I try it’s so hard – she sucks the life out of the office.
TODD ANSWERS: There is really very little we can do to change others. But, often when we change our reaction, other people adjust how they interact with you. The best thing to do when we get upset in these situations is self inquiry, such as, “Why am I really upset? Is there a way I can be in this moment and not be upset? Can I even love this moment?”
Path to Peace With Todd Perelmuter NewsletterLet the wisdom of ashrams, monasteries and shamans from around the world get delivered right to your inbox.
Please leave this field empty. The post When the Negative Nelly is a Colleague You Can’t Ignore appeared first on EastWesticism.
February 20, 2024
When a Sensory Pleasure Hedonistic & When a Beautiful Experience
The distinction between a sensory pleasure being hedonistic and a beautiful experience lies in the depth and nature of the encounter. While both involve a heightened sense of enjoyment, they diverge in their underlying qualities and the impact they have on one’s well-being.
A sensory pleasure is often hedonistic when it prioritizes immediate gratification and indulgence in sensory stimuli. This could include the enjoyment derived from taste, touch, sight, sound, or smell. Hedonistic pleasures tend to be fleeting, driven by the pursuit of momentary satisfaction without necessarily considering long-term consequences. For example, savoring a decadent dessert purely for the pleasure of taste, without regard for its nutritional impact, may be considered a hedonistic sensory pleasure.
Q: Dear Todd, I’d love guidance on the grey areas. What is materialistic and consumptive and what is meaningful and spiritual? If I buy a new flashy car is that superficial or if I love driving that much the beautiful aesthetic of the car and the travel is that a bad thing? When is a sensory pleasure hedonistic and when is it simply a beautiful experience?
TODD ANSWERS: All answers come from a deep place of mindfulness. If you are fully mindful, mindful of your own desires, mindful of the environmental and economic and social impact of your choices and you are fully aware of every facet of this decision, then you will know if it’s coming from a place of conditioning, ego, or it is a decision in alignment with your intentions and your greatest good.
Path to Peace With Todd Perelmuter NewsletterLet the wisdom of ashrams, monasteries and shamans from around the world get delivered right to your inbox.
Please leave this field empty. The post When a Sensory Pleasure Hedonistic & When a Beautiful Experience appeared first on EastWesticism.
February 16, 2024
How to Take Life Seriously
Q: Dear Todd, how to take life seriously?
TODD ANSWERS: When we wonder whether we are taking life too seriously or not enough, we are stuck in the middle of two polarities. The key to breaking free is to not take life at all. That’s right. Just leave it be. None of us are so powerful as to be able to control the many forces of the universe that were set in motion long before we arrived on the scene.
When we are too serious, we try to control everything. But of course, we cannot. And so, we get very frustrated when things don’t go our way. When we are too serious, we can never enjoy ourselves because trying to be in control is a 24/7 job.
Similarly, when we aren’t serious enough, we only go with the flow. Life happens to us instead of us playing the role we were put on this Earth to play. We take no active role and we just hope for the best.
But the wise sage knows of the middle path, free from polarities. The wise person understands their role as witness and creator. We don’t have to always juggle the universe in our hands. With presence and mindfulness, we can see where action can be taken to create better outcomes, and we can see what is beyond our ability and thus beyond our area of concern. With presence, we can flow while influencing outcomes. We can find joy in work, we can be silly and serious, and we can relax yet be responsible.
The key to finding the middle path is action without attachment to the outcome. Action without thoughts about the future is how we enjoy the grind. All life happens in the present moment. Procrastination is death because we are inviting the past into the now. We are delaying being present as long as we delay a task that needs to be done.
The quicker we do the tasks that need to be done in our lives, the quicker we can get back to, and stay, in the here and now. In this way, we become more responsible. Our lives begin to look more serious from the outside, but on the inside we are as joyful, playful, present and free as can be.
Path to Peace With Todd Perelmuter NewsletterLet the wisdom of ashrams, monasteries and shamans from around the world get delivered right to your inbox.
Please leave this field empty. The post How to Take Life Seriously appeared first on EastWesticism.
February 15, 2024
Path to Peace The Cure for Loneliness
Human beings need social connection in order to live full, happy, safe and protected lives. It's hardwired into our DNA. No human was brought into this world without the love and nurturing of someone else. But too often in our modern society, we find there is no tribe, no village, and no community to offer that safety and comfort.
In today's podcast I talk about the two types of actions we have to take to deal with loneliness: internal action and external action. I share how we can accept, embrace and love our alone time. And I discuss how we can start building those loving relationships we all deserve.
Please enjoy other episodes where I share meditation techniques, tips and spiritual lessons from around the world for peaceful and stress-free living. Remember to subscribe to stay up-to-date.
*****
If you ever feel like my words brought a change in your life, and want to show your SUPPORT for what I am doing, click here.
Find all of my BOOKS for wherever you are on your spiritual journey : https://www.eastwesticism.org/spiritual-meditation-books/
Want to gift a book to a prisoner? Go here.
Path to Peace with Todd Perelmuter is proud to be supported by the nonprofit, Village Direct dedicated to bringing isolated villages' expert artistry directly to you.
The post Path to Peace The Cure for Loneliness appeared first on EastWesticism.
