Emje McCarty's Blog, page 16

two minute neurotic comics

some angst needing to be worked out via the art journal comic….

saint nobody page seven

something amazing, i guess

looking for love in all the wrong places….
out of longing for a conversation, i once again found myself on a dating site looking for something amazing amidst the dredges of the dating world (i know that by association, i am also classified as being in the dredges of the dating world.)
i got a lot of attention on the site (i can be easy on the eyes)…but none of it was what i was looking for.
instead of responding to messages, i did these comics in my art journal.
one doof said, “i love your hippie energy.” just so you know, if you call me a fucking hippie in any way or form, i will start foaming at the mouth. i’m punk rock, goddammit.
another guy sent me a poem about a mile long that he wrote years ago. something about merlin & dragons, saying he thought i would like it.
i have used free verse poetry as a means of communication and have enjoyed poetry i’ve found here on wp, but in general, i loathe poetry. i don’t want to read random guy’s poem. especially if it’s a mile long. maybe a haiku next time, guy?
so instead of being a cunt on a dating site, i put my pissiness into my portrait of dorian gray style art journal

daily doodles

i write in a journal daily. it is both an art journal & a book of shadows.
if you are new to me, know this, art keeps me sane. or sane-ish. i totally recommend some daily doodles.

i was doing yoga the other day (another thing that keeps me sane-ish) & while in corpse pose, i noticed the cobwebs on my ceiling were kind of making a face at me. so i doodled the face.

hopefully i will be doing some new comics soon. i have to wait for my muses…but i’m out of whiskey. ha!
i also need to feed my fairies….
but i got a new kick ass tarot deck & that is inspiring me
so! new comics soon.

doodlin’ in the new year

(just an art journal doodle to keep my pen loose)

i used to have a bumper sticker that said, “i do whatever the little voices tell me to do.”

yup.

that’s how i ended up in wisconsin after years of living in kentucky & texas. 

now the little voices are telling me to quit my job. while my logical brain insists we need the income, the little voices tell me to take a leap of faith. my job is basically so i don’t drown in credit card debt. it’s restaurant work; something that i am amazingly gifted at, but find no joy in. should i do something just because i am good at it? should i stay at a job because i know it will suck for them if i leave even though they never tell me how awesome i am?

actually, based on my experience at this job, i have decided that from now on if i have been in any kind of relationship for a month—be it professional or romantic, etc—and have not been told “you are amazing; i am so lucky to have you,” then i need to move on.

i could go into all the hows & why my job sucks despite the decent pay & “laid back” working conditions. i mean, i come home nights exhausted & so pissed off at the drama of it, but the real reason i’m quitting, is because my soul dies a little every day that i put my energy into something other than my own dreams. 

i need to follow my own dreams.

i need to figure out a way to make money that doesn’t make me die on the inside….

i am reminded of when i was 18 and my dad, who was close to 50 & trying to talk me out of being a writer, told me how he had wanted to be a farmer but had to make sacrifices in order to support himself & his family thereby choosing a soul-sucking job that left him a shell of a person. to this i said, “it’s not too late, dad.”
to myself now i say, “it’s not too late, emje.” 

in other news, i have a novel being published in the very near future (little skeletons), and i have started working on another novel (working title… apocalyptic mama: how to survive the end of the world)

i am still working on comics. i post pages here as i finish them. saint nobody as well as a reboot of confusion perfume.

and i am going to use any free time to look for an opportunity to work close up in regenerative agriculture &/or food forestry because i totally want to be a farmer too. 

finally, i made a pledge early on in 2023 that i would donate 10% of my art & writing sales to 360.org. however, since no one really seemed to respond to that & because i recently tried to read something by bill mckibben & got pissed off, i decided to donate the 10% to a local environmental cause instead. i sold $775 in art & writings, so i am donating $77.50 to the coon creek conservation watershed committee which is a cause that effects me very close to my home & to my heart. 

i have always believed that resolutions should happen every day, but sometimes they happen to happen at the new year….

ps. 10% of 2024 sales will again be donated to an environmental cause of my choosing.

saint nobody…page six

saint nobody…page five

confusion perfume…is this natural?

diary of an eco-terrorist…? :)

happy solstice (i’m still here)

on belonging

in the 1930s coon valley wisconsin was a flagship site for the ccc’s efforts to stop the negative effects of farming in the u.s. coon valley had been colonized by the norwegians who farmed as if they were still in norway where rains are softer & tamer than the storms of the midwest. soil was washing out of fields & into coon creek. coon creek went from being a deep, cold trout stream to being a wide, warm, & muddy stream. 

the ccc was a group of young men being offered an opportunity by the u.s. government when there were not very many opportunities to be had. they learned conservation & then set out to teach these methods to local farmers around the country.

soon the coon creek watershed was healthy again due to terrace style farming & plantings to hold the soil in place. the frequent flooding slowed.

but poor farming choices continued with mono-cropping & over grazing of pasture lands among other things. 

in 2018, an epic rainstorm washed out three dams & a pump station failed. water from all through the coon creek watershed dumped into the creek & a good chunk of coon valley went underwater.

then the cccwc formed. a conservation group designed to protect the coon creek watershed. 

& in 2021 i moved to coon valley into one of the flood damaged homes. 

my home has been here through it all, having been built in the late 1800s or early 1900s by the town blacksmith (not a norwegian.) my home has seen how many floods? the last one coming into the first story of my house, leaving mud & damage that was still there when i bought it 3 years later.

i have been interested in conservation for as long as i can remember. it started with noticing litter & wanting to do something about it. it went on to become an objection to factory farming. & continued to flourish.

now i find myself drawn to the cccwc group. i attended a few meetings over the summer, but i felt like such a sore thumb to the group that i stopped going. 

then i returned to the group last week.

i still don’t fit in, but now i realize that i don’t have to. i share the same concerns they share. i am as passionate as they are. just because i’m an oddball doesn’t mean i have to live my life alone. i can contribute in my own unique way. 
and i do want to contribute. 

i may never belong…but that doesn’t mean i can’t take part.