Page Turner's Blog, page 130

20.2 Boats & Lighthouses: Collective Risk Assessment in Polyamorous Relationship Systems

20.2 How do I feel about me or my partner having sex with someone whose STI status is unknown? What do I consider “safer sex” under such circumstances?

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“I’m going to camp soon, and there are going to be people there I might want to play with. So I wanted to talk about what you’re comfortable with,”  » Read more

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I’ll Tell You Everything, But You’ll Never See Dirty Laundry

“I only share when I have no unmet needs that I’m trying to fill. I firmly believe that being vulnerable with a larger audience is only a good idea if the healing is tied to the sharing, not to the expectations I might have for the response I get.”

–Brené Brown

I Don’t Like to Do Chores in Front of Other People

Like any idiom that’s in common use,  » Read more

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Poly Pitfalls: The Sampler Who Makes the Impulse Purchase

“I’m going to Costco in a bit,” I say to Ro.

“Have fun,” she replies. “Eat many samples.”

“Mmm samples,” I say.

And I’m off to the store.

It’s Saturday, so the sampling stations are out in full force. One worker is making some kind of veggie burgers.  » Read more

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I Used to Think Loving Someone Meant Never Hurting Them

I’ve changed a lot over the years. I used to think that when you loved someone it meant that their fears took precedence over your own. And that you should do anything to keep from hurting them.

I still have an old journal from my first semester at college (1999). It has a fabric yellow cover,  » Read more

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3 Differences Between a Dominant & Someone Who Just Uses it as an Excuse to Be Controlling

What is the difference between a dominant and someone who just uses it as an excuse to be controlling?

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1. Consent Is an Important Part of Dominance.

The bottom line is very simple: It boils down to consent.

A healthy D/s relationship happens between two people who are willing participants.  » Read more

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Don’t Stop Being Friends Just Because You Start Dating

It is not a lack of love, but a lack of friendship that makes unhappy marriages.

-Friedrich Nietzsche

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I tell him that I don’t feel good. That I feel like something’s chasing me.

I’m not always great at knowing the words for the symptoms I’m having,  » Read more

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PQ 20.1 — Do I know my current STI status and that of all my partners?

PQ 20.1 — Do I know my current STI status and that of all my partners?

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Yes! And I know the status of my metamours.

I also know which relationships use protection and which don’t. And a reasonable snapshot of what new sexual contact might come over the horizon.  » Read more

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PQ 19.7 — What happens if I or a partner of mine has an unexpected pregnancy?

PQ 19.7 — What happens if I or a partner of mine has an unexpected pregnancy?

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I’ve Dated People With Children Before. I Would Again.

At one point in my polyamorous life, I had two pregnant girlfriends.

Well, sort of.

One I knew about since she was visibly and obviously pregnant.  » Read more

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Is It Disrespectful of My Partner’s Other Relationships to Expect Chores to Be Done?

Hi Page, 

Is it being disrespectful of the secondary relationship(s) to expect the person to finish their household chores before they focus their energy on that person/ those people? I’m not talking about saying hi and letting them know you made it home safe. I mean full-on in-depth, could take hours,  » Read more

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What It Was Like Growing Up Bisexual & Being the First Girl In My Class to Develop

I remember standing in the movie theater staring at a game I couldn’t take my eyes off. It was there, wedged in between the spiral wishing well funnel you dropped coins into and what was essentially a glorified mood ring, where you’d press as hard as you could, and it would tell you how stressed you were —  » Read more

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