Doug Ward's Blog, page 91
May 28, 2014
Ward's Laws #1813
The movie "Gods and Generals" was so boring I use it as a sleep aid.
May 26, 2014
Ward's Laws #1810
I invented an app that stores your passwords to all your important programs and sites. I'm putting it up for free cause I don't need money to support the app. Not after I get all of your passwords that is.
May 25, 2014
Ward's Laws #1808
Bridesmaids dresses are designed to make sure the bride looks prettier than her friends. Why else would you buy a dress that you, or anyone else, would never buy or ever wear at any other occasion for any reason even on a dare.
May 23, 2014
Ward's Laws #1807
I wonder how many people continued eating Soylent Green even after they found out is was made from people.
May 22, 2014
Ward's Laws #1805
Why can't I ever remember what I did on past Memorial Days?
May 21, 2014
Ward's Laws #1803
What's a zombies favorite cookie? Lady fingers.
May 20, 2014
Ward's Laws #1801
If we have all this fracking going on in Pennsylvania, why haven't my gas bills dropped? I mean, they're making this crap in my backyard, right?
May 19, 2014
Ward's Laws #1798
I tried to create an alternate power source for my car. I guess using a windmill was a bad choice. An even worse decision might have been to fasten it to my roof with duct tape.
May 18, 2014
Ward's Laws #1796
India ink was first invented in... China.
May 14, 2014
Ward's Laws #1795
Why aren't nursery rhymes more age appropriate?
