Doug Ward's Blog, page 55
October 5, 2015
Ward's Words #524
I find it very rude to have a conversation while driving. The whole time you're having a discussion, the people in the front seat have their backs to the passengers in the rear. They have to talk to the back of your head. It's totally unacceptable. The good people at Ward's Words have changed all that. We reversed the front seat to facilitate better discussions. Sure, it does make it harder to drive, but that's what cruise control is for, right.
October 3, 2015
Ward's Words #523
I'll never do EVP's in my house again. All I could hear was lots of paranormal laughing sounds. It wouldn't be as disturbing if I wasn't in the bathroom at the time.
October 2, 2015
Ward's Words #521
If Christians want to weaken Satan’s demons hold on our world why would we exercise them? Doesn’t that make them stronger?
October 1, 2015
Ward's Words #518
I’m trying to figure out why cats want to live with humans. We seem to be such an inconvenience to them.
September 30, 2015
Ward’s Words #517
Ward’s Words, in an attempt to one up NASA found water on Uranus. This begs the question of life being… what? It was your anus? You used a towel to… DAMMIT! Never mind.
September 28, 2015
Ward's Words #514
An iceberg sinking The Titanic is the the greatest zombie outbreak coverup story ever.
September 27, 2015
Ward's Words #513
At the beginning of Dog the Bounty Hunter is a message stating, "Don't try this at home." I don’t get it. Do they think I’ll try to collect a bounty on my brother or something. Not that he jumped bail or anything. Although, he did skip out on a grounding once. I wonder what that would be worth?
September 26, 2015
Ward's Words #512
I was stopped in the airport and they said they had to preform a cavity search. Let's just say my dentist never looked there for a cavity.
September 22, 2015
Ward's Words #509
Did you now you have a ballcock in your toilet? That’s right, the guts of your toilet is called a ballcock. I can’t write them this easy. Wow.
September 21, 2015
Ward's Words #507
I wouldn't go down the street to Circle K with Liam Neeson. I’d probably wind up in Istanbul sold into the flesh trade. Well, the joke’s on them cause I lost a lot of weight.
