Doug Ward's Blog, page 22

Ward's Words #1148

I'm such a comic fanboy that when attending a baseball game I get excited when I see the batboy thinking he might be a young Bruce Wayne.

Ward's Words #1147

My boss saw how torn up I am right now and asked me if I was in a Fight Club or something. I smiled and explained that I have a new puppy.

Ward's Words #1145

My high school gym teacher made me join the track team. I was kind of like the batboy. My official position was javelin catcher.

Ward's Words #1143

My new Amish cellular carrier isn’t so bad. But if one end of the string comes out of your can, tech support can be a struggle.

Ward's Words #1140

Doesn't the Mona Lisa look like a Renaissance school picture? Her hands in her lap with her head turned just so. I remember that string they used to get our chin in just the right place.

Ward's Words #1138

There was Batman, then Batgirl, Bat-hound, the Batmobile, the Batarang. So where'd Robin come in? What a lame bird to be named after. He couldn't be Eagle-Lad. Or even The Predator. No, he's a robin. Look, it must be spring, cause here's Robin. How emasculating!

Ward's Words #1137

The pizza industry announced that they will be cutting corners by making round boxes.

Ward’s Words #1134

Who came up with the concept of hollow core interior doors? Why not use curtains for all the good it will do during the upcoming zombie apocalypse.

Ward's Words #1133

Why is it that the ears of a chocolate rabbit are the first to be devoured but you never eat the ears from a real rabbit.  At least, not first.

Ward's Words #1131

I hate to go to the movies. Sitting in a packed room breathing the same air that everyone else is breathing just seems unsanitary.