The Final Warning Quotes

“What happened to your tan?"--Fang
"It was dirt." --Max”
― James Patterson, The Final Warning

“Here's a freebie: Don't play poker with a kid who can read minds.”
― James Patterson, The Final Warning

“I want to do it too!" (sitting motionless)
Nudge: "Nope, you stand out like a fart in a church."
Max: (muttering) "Appropriately enough."
Iggy: "What about me?" (stands still)
Max: "No, you're visible."
Iggy: "Am not!"
Max: (throws a pinecone at him) "Could I do that if I wouldn't see you?”
― James Patterson, The Final Warning

“He [Iggy] started reaching for things around the table, and his hand landed on Total. “You’re black.”
“I prefer canine-American,” said Total.”
― James Patterson, The Final Warning

“Max: "Okay guys, I had a couple thoughts I wanted to go over with you."
Iggy: (pretends to snore loudy)
Max: (throws another pinecone at him)
Iggy: "Quit throwing things at me!"
Max: "Glad you could join us.”
― James Patterson, The Final Warning

“Oh no! Don't drag us away from Antartica and take us to the playground of the rich and famous! Not that briar patch! -Max”
― James Patterson, The Final Warning

“Fang: "Have you guys been playing in the toxic waste again? Been bitten by a radioactive spider? Struck by lightning? Drink a super-soldier serum?”
― James Patterson, The Final Warning

“Right now, America looks like a fatheaded, shortsighted, gas-guzzling arrogant blowhard to the rest of the world.”
― James Patterson, The Final Warning

“A Poem
By Max

White is the color of little bunnies with pink noses.
White is the color of fluffy clouds fluffing their way across the sky.
White is the color of angel's wings and Angel's wings.
White is the color of brand-new ankle socks fresh out of the bag.
White is the color of crisp sheets in schmancy hotels.
White is the color of every last freaking, gol-danged thing you see for endless miles and miles if you happen to be in Antarctica trying to save the world, which now you aren't so sure you can do because you feel like if you see any more whiteness-Wonder Bread, someone's underwear, teeth-you will completely and totally lose your ever-lovin' mind and wind up pushing a grocery cart full of empty cans around New York City, muttering to yourself.

That was my first poem ever.
Okay, so it's not Shakespeare, but I liked it.”
― James Patterson, The Final Warning

“Love hurts."
Oh, shut UP!" - pg 123”
― James Patterson, The Final Warning

“You stand out like a fart in a church.”
― James Patterson, The Final Warning

“The hamster called. He wants his home back.”
― James Patterson, The Final Warning

“Oh great. Yoda captured us.”
― James Patterson, The Final Warning

“Okay, that so did me in. Mr. Rock being all emotional? Expressing his feelings?" p. 12”
― James Patterson, The Final Warning

“What, eBay isn't good enough for us?”
― James Patterson, The Final Warning

“I recommend you stick to your own species, Shy Babe.”
― James Patterson, The Final Warning

“I'm magnetic," she whispered, half awed and half horrified.
"I hope you don't start sticking to fridges and stuff," I said in disbelief.
Fang dropped down next to me, and the Gasman joined us, squishing in next to Nudge.
"What's going on?" Fang asked.
"I'm Magnet Girl!" Nudge said, already coming to terms with her new skill.”
― James Patterson, The Final Warning

“Angel?" I said. "Baby penguins eat a regurgitated mixture of partially digested fish, krill, and an oily substance form their fathers' stomachs. Are you willing to eat a bunch of raw fish and krill, and then barf it back up into a baby penguin's cute, cheeping mouth? Like, every hour?" Sometimes my crushing logic astounds even me.”
― James Patterson, The Final Warning

“Have you guys been playing in toxic waste again?" Fang asked severely, putting his hands on his hips.
Nudge giggled. "No."
"Been bitten by a radioactive spider?" Fang went on. "Struck by lightning? Drink a super-soldier serum?"
"No, no, no," said Iggy. He started reaching for things around the table, and his hand landed on Total. "You're black."
"I prefer canine-American." said Total. "When's that pie coming? I'm starving.”
― James Patterson, The Final Warning

“If by 'miracle kids' you mean innocent test-tube babies whose DNA was forcibly unraveled and merged with two percent avian genes, yeah, I guess that would be us," I said. "Because it's a miracle that we're not complete nut jobs and mutant disasters.”
― James Patterson, The Final Warning

“It's the ciiiiiiiiiiiiircle of liiiiiiiiiife!" Iggy sang”
― James Patterson, The Final Warning

“What are you doing in there, waxing your mustache?” Iggy yelled, pounding on the bathroom door.
I yanked the door open and pushed him backward hard, making him stagger. “I don’t have a mustache, you idiot!” Iggy giggled and put his arms up to protect himself in case I punched him. “And you know what?” I added. “You don’t have one either. Well, maybe in a couple years. You can always hope.”
I left him in the hallway, anxiously fingering his upper lip.”
― James Patterson, The Final Warning

“She didn't flirt with him, but they hung out together a lot, and every time I saw their heads bent over a computer screen or map, it made my stomach clench. And my teeth. And my fists.”
― James Patterson, The Final Warning

“Love hurts,”
― James Patterson, The Final Warning

“Thank you for inviting me here today " I said my voice sounding nothing like me. "I'm here to testify about things I've seen and experienced myself. I'm here because the human race has become more powerful than ever. We've gone to the moon. Our crops resist diseases and pests. We can stop and restart a human heart. And we've harvested vast amounts of energy for everything from night-lights to enormous super-jets. We've even created new kinds of people, like me.

"But everything mankind" - I frowned - "personkind has accomplished has had a price. One that we're all gonna have to pay."
I heard coughing and shifting in the audience. I looked down at my notes and all the little black words blurred together on the page. I just could not get through this.

I put the speech down picked up the microphone and came out from behind the podium.

"Look " I said. "There's a lot of official stuff I could quote and put up on the screen with PowerPoint. But what you need to know what the world needs to know is that we're really destroying the earth in a bigger and more catastrophic was than anyone has ever imagined.

"I mean I've seen a lot of the world the only world we have. There are so many awesome beautiful tings in it. Waterfalls and mountains thermal pools surrounded by sand like white sugar. Field and field of wildflowers. Places where the ocean crashes up against a mountainside like it's done for hundreds of thousands of years.

"I've also seen concrete cities with hardly any green. And rivers whose pretty rainbow surfaces came from an oil leak upstream. Animals are becoming extinct right now in my lifetime. Just recently I went through one of the worst hurricanes ever recorded. It was a whole lot worse because of huge worldwide climatic changes caused by... us. We the people."

....

"A more perfect union While huge corporations do whatever they want to whoever they want and other people live in subway tunnels Where's the justice of that Kids right here in America go to be hungry every night while other people get four-hundred-dollar haircuts. Promote the general welfare Where's the General welfare in strip-mining toxic pesticides industrial solvents being dumped into rivers killing everything Domestic Tranquility Ever sleep in a forest that's being clear-cut You'd be hearing chain saws in your head for weeks. The blessings of liberty Yes. I'm using one of the blessings of liberty right now my freedom of speech to tell you guys who make the laws that the very ground you stand on the house you live in the children you tuck in at night are all in immediate catastrophic danger.”
― James Patterson, The Final Warning

“He rolled his eyes and took my hand. His hand was hard and calloused, tough with muscle and old scars.
The night settled around us like a blanket. I could hear the water lapping against the dock. We were totally alone.
“You’re . . . ,” he began, and I waited, heart throbbing in my throat. “Such a pain,” he concluded.
“What?” I asked, just as his head swooped in and his mouth touched mine. I tried to speak, but one of
Fang’s hands held the back of my head, and he kept his lips pressed against me, kissing me softly but with a Fanglike determination.
Oh, jeez, I thought distractedly. Jeez, this is Fang, and me, and . . . Fang tilted his head to kiss me more deeply, and I felt totally lightheaded. Then I remembered to breathe through my nose, and the fog cleared a tiny bit. Somehow we were pressed together, Fang’s arms around me now, sliding under my
wings, his hands flat against my back.
It was incredible. I loved it. I loved him.
It was a total disaster.
Gasping, I pulled back. “I, uh—,” I began oh so coherently, and then I jumped up, almost knocking him
over, and raced down the dock. I took off, flying fast, like a rocket.”
― James Patterson, The Final Warning

“Time for bed.” I held my fist out. One by one, my flock stacked theirs on top, and then we headed up into the trees to sleep the sleep of the innocent. Well, okay, maybe not so innocent. But the sleep of the much less guilty than others, for sure.”
― James Patterson, The Final Warning

“Once a bird kid, always a bird kid.
- maximum ride series”
― James Patterson, The Final Warning

“Nope, you stick out like a fart in a church.”
― James Patterson, The Final Warning

“Not saving you from this storm, mutant,” he said. “Saving you for your later fate, we are.”
His voice was weirdly inflected and metallic, like an automated answering machine.
“Oh, good. Yoda captured us,” Fang whispered.”
― James Patterson, The Final Warning