Christiana

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Erin Morgenstern
“Most maidens are perfectly capable of rescuing themselves in my experience, at least the ones worth something, in any case.”
Erin Morgenstern, The Night Circus

Erin Morgenstern
“I do not mourn the loss of my sister because she will always be with me, in my heart," she says. "I am, however, rather annoyed that my Tara has left me to suffer you lot alone. I do not see as well without her. I do not hear as well without her. I do not feel as well without her. I would be better off without a hand or a leg than without my sister. Then at least she would be here to mock my appearance and claim to be the pretty one for a change. We have all lost our Tara, but I have lost a part of myself as well.”
Erin Morgenstern, The Night Circus

Melina Marchetta
“Where did this come from? Do you know what this is? Luca is going to sneak out of bed in the middle of the night and squirt it on his tongue. It's like drugs for ten-year-olds. Today it's Ice Magic. Tomorrow, heroin.”
Melina Marchetta, Saving Francesca

Simon Rich
“I still remember the day I got my first calculator

Teacher: All right, children, welcome to fourth grade math. Everyone take a calculator out of the bin.
Me: What are these?
Teacher: From now on we'll be using calculators.
Me: What do these things do?
Teacher: Simple operations, like multiplication and division.
Me: You mean this device just...does them? By itself?
Teacher: Yes. You enter in the problem and press equal.
Me: You...you knew about this machine all along, didn't you? This whole time, while we were going through this...this charade with the pencils and the line paper and the stupid multiplication tables!...I'm sorry for shouting...It's just...I'm a little blown away.
Teacher: Okay, everyone, today we're going to go over some word problems.
Me: What the hell else do you have back there? A magical pen that writes book reports by itself? Some kind of automatic social studies worksheet that...that fills itself out? What the hell is going on?
Teacher: If a farmer farms five acres of land a day--
Me: So that's it, then. The past three years have been a total farce. All this time I've been thinking, "Well, this is pretty hard and frustrating but I guess these are useful skills to have." Meanwhile, there was a whole bin of these things in your desk. We could have jumped straight to graphing. Unless, of course, there's some kind of graphing calculator!
Teacher: There is. You get one in ninth grade.
Me: Is this...Am I on TV? Is this a prank show?
Teacher: No.”
Simon Rich, Ant Farm and Other Desperate Situations
tags: humor

Aphra Behn
“There is no sinner like a young saint.”
Aphra Behn

25x33 Worthington Newbery and Caldecott and Printz Predictions — 19 members — last activity Apr 18, 2011 06:59AM
Here's your chance to add your predictions for the 2011 Newbery and Caldecott Awards and Printz. ...more
185 What's the Name of That Book??? — 121405 members — last activity 32 minutes ago
Can't remember the title of a book you read? Come search our bookshelves and discussion posts. If you don’t find it there, post a description on our U ...more
101330 KMS Book & Bag — 5 members — last activity Apr 25, 2013 06:32PM
The Book & Bag club of Kilbourne Middle School. ...more
101613 UAPL Adult Services — 373 members — last activity Jun 01, 2026 10:48AM
UAPL Adult librarians and staff share new releases, recommendations, and favorites for adults readers. Visit us at http://www.ualibrary.org
43519 readers advisory for all — 5740 members — last activity Mar 10, 2026 04:29AM
life's too short to read crappy books. this is why readers' advisory exists. feel free to join if you are looking for "a book like____" or "a book tha ...more
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