Quotes About Shaving

Quotes tagged as "shaving" (showing 1-13 of 13)
James Joyce
“Stately, plump Buck Mulligan came from the stairhead, bearing a bowl of lather on which a mirror and a razor lay crossed.”
James Joyce, Ulysses

Libba Bray
“I've had so many bikini waxes, I cry every time I see a Popsicle stick.”
Libba Bray, Beauty Queens

Tom Robbins
“Of the Seven Dwarfs, the only one who shaved was Dopey. That should tell us something about the wisdom of shaving.”
Tom Robbins, Skinny Legs and All

David Wong
“The bathroom door burst open, and Molly came trotting out. The left half of her body had been shaved almost down to the skin. The right half was as shaggy as before. John emerged after her, brushing a layer of dog hair off his clothes.

John said, "Well, that's done... It was Molly's idea. She wants to look like two different dogs when she's coming and going. She thinks it will make it easier for her to steal food... That's one complicated dog, Dave. Have you started on the bomb?”
David Wong, John Dies at the End

John Steinbeck
“A man with a beard was always a little suspect anyway. You couldn't say you wore a beard because you liked a beard. People didn't like you for telling the truth. You had to say you had a scar so you couldn't shave.”
John Steinbeck, Cannery Row

Ben Lerner
“Shaving is a way to start the workday by ritually not cutting your throat when you’ve the chance.”
Ben Lerner, 10:04

Robert L. Slater
“Lizzie ignored the hair in her armpits and on her legs. It had gone from stubble to dark hair. F*** it. End of the world rules apply.”
Robert L. Slater

Crystal Woods
“I had a dream about you last night. You set a timer on in the bathroom to prove how long it takes me to get ready. So I shaved your legs, made up your face and gave you lashes. An hour later you thanked God for not making you a woman.”
Crystal Woods, Dreaming is for lovers

Howard Tayler
“Does that mean that if we shave all the Ob'enn they'll be nice?”
Howard Tayler, The Scrapyard of Insufferable Arrogance

Billy Collins
“I can see one of them clearly now, walking
along with a newspaper tucked under his arm.
he has cut himself shaving and a bit of tissue
with a circle of blood is stuck to his cheek,”
Billy Collins, The Apple That Astonished Paris

Kate Meader
“She had shaved above the knee, packed her suitcase with her skimpiest lingerie, and the instructions on the Sexy Weekend Fun Box said, “Just Add Texan.” What she had not expected was Hunter putting her on a Tex-free diet.”
Kate Meader, Even the Score

“There's a reason caveman started to develop sophisticated tools before the meteor wiped them all out: It's so they could fucking shave. Do you know how frustrating it must have been to be hunched over all night trying to start a fire only to finally succeed just to have your beard go up in flames? No aloe vera back then.”
Ari Gold, The Gold Standard: Rules to Rule By

Ryan Lilly
“I check every can of Barbasol I buy for dinosaur embryos. I haven't found any yet, as evidenced by the lack of T-Rex screams in my apartment.”
Ryan Lilly

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