Deval > Deval's Quotes

“The trouble with having an open mind, of course, is that people will insist on coming along and trying to put things in it.”
― Terry Pratchett, Diggers

“Women and cats will do as they please, and men and dogs should relax and get used to the idea.”
― Robert A. Heinlein

“I am free of all prejudice. I hate everyone equally. ”
― W.C. Fields

“My tastes are simple: I am easily satisfied with the best.”
― Winston S. Churchill

“Be nice to nerds. You may end up working for them. We all could.”
― Charles J. Sykes, Dumbing Down Our Kids: Why American Children Feel Good About Themselves But Can't Read, Write or Add

“Insanity is doing the same thing, over and over again, but expecting different results.”
― Narcotics Anonymous

“Creativity is knowing how to hide your sources”
― C.E.M. Joad

“A lady's imagination is very rapid; it jumps from admiration to love, from love to matrimony in a moment.”
― Jane Austen, Pride and Prejudice

“I don't know the question, but sex is definitely the answer.”
― Woody Allen

“The trouble with being in the rat race is that even if you win, you're still a rat.”
― Lily Tomlin

“The saddest aspect of life right now is that science gathers knowledge faster than society gathers wisdom.”
― Isaac Asimov

“I feel that life is divided into the horrible and the miserable. That's the two categories. The horrible are like, I don't know, terminal cases, you know, and blind people, crippled. I don't know how they get through life. It's amazing to me. And the miserable is everyone else. So you should be thankful that you're miserable, because that's very lucky, to be miserable.”
― Woody Allen, Annie Hall: Screenplay

“There's an old joke - um... two elderly women are at a Catskill mountain resort, and one of 'em says, "Boy, the food at this place is really terrible." The other one says, "Yeah, I know; and such small portions." Well, that's essentially how I feel about life - full of loneliness, and misery, and suffering, and unhappiness, and it's all over much too quickly.”
― Woody Allen, Annie Hall: Screenplay

“I speak to everyone in the same way, whether he is the garbage man or the president of the university.”
― Albert Einstein

“We don't see things as they are, we see them as we are.”
― Anaïs Nin

“Maybe this world is another planet’s hell.”
― Aldous Huxley

“I'm not the smartest fellow in the world, but I can sure pick smart colleagues.”
― Franklin D. Roosevelt

“Hell is empty and all the devils are here.”
― William Shakespeare, The Tempest

“Reality continues to ruin my life.”
― Bill Watterson, The Complete Calvin and Hobbes

“If you can't explain it to a six year old, you don't understand it yourself.”
― Albert Einstein

“If you're looking for sympathy you'll find it between shit and syphilis in the dictionary.”
― David Sedaris, Barrel Fever: Stories and Essays

“The reason I talk to myself is because I’m the only one whose answers I accept.”
― George Carlin

“Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, 'Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous?' Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God. Your playing small does not serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won't feel insecure around you. We are all meant to shine, as children do. We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. It's not just in some of us; it's in everyone. And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others.”
― Marianne Williamson, A Return to Love: Reflections on the Principles of "A Course in Miracles"

“Failure is usually boring. It is the credible but unrealized threat of failure that is interesting.”
― Robin Laws

“The true mystery of the world is the visible, not the invisible.”
― Oscar Wilde

“Everyone should be able to do one card trick, tell two jokes, and recite three poems, in case they are ever trapped in an elevator.”
― Lemony Snicket, Horseradish: Bitter Truths You Can't Avoid

“Opera is when a guy gets stabbed in the back and, instead of bleeding, he sings.”
― Robert Benchley

“Can I come in?
No! I'm in a towel!
I'm blind!”
― James Patterson

“A lot of people ask me if I were shipwrecked, and could have only one book, what would it be? I always say, "How to Build a Boat.”
― Stephen Wright

“Just relax and breathe through your ass.”
― Lewis Black, Me of Little Faith