Lily Ableman's Blog, page 8

Wasting Time on Entertainment Weekly

*Mention of UChicago in an article about an actor on Supernatural, Misha Collins! Here’s his description of the University of Chicago (his alma mater!):

“It used to be a very academically rigorous and a very socially dismal place,” Collins says. “The only social interaction we had was in the basement of the library where there was a little coffee shop. We didn’t even have a student center. There was a study commissioned at the University of Chicago of the top 300 universities, and we ranked 300 out of 300 for social life. [We were] the very, very worst—under the Naval Academy, I might add. “

Ha, ha, Collins, it USED TO BE an academically vigorous and socially dismal place?

*Sneak peek at Reign Season 2:

More deaths? Hooray!

I have to admit that Reign is an absolutely ridiculous show. I enjoy it, but man, it butchers history and it’s basically teen-friendly porn.

In the first season alone, we have a massacre in a brothel, a king choking a prostitute to death during sex, a king literally humping a woman out the window (and of course, to her death), multiple poisonings, consummation scenes, a lesbian make-out scene, attempted rape, executions, human sacrifices, and so much more.

And to people who call it Game of Thrones for chicks, uh, no. Yeah, there’s the scheming, power struggles, gratuitous sex, and somewhat magical elements, but it’s not Game of Thrones. Trust me.

*First Fifty Shades of Grey trailer:

Okay, as sad as it might be, I was actually excited for this.

I don’t know why. I didn’t even like the book and thought it was pretty fucking terrible, but I’m obsessed about the upcoming movie.

Thoughts on the trailer:

Dakota Johnson actually seemed pretty decent in it. Though, I have to agree with some people that she does look kind of old for the part.

But Jamie Dornan seemed kind of bad. And dull. Hot but the acting seemed to be the quality of Jamie Campbell Bower in The Mortal Instruments: City of Bones (as in, ugh).

Granted, he said maybe 5 lines in the trailer. Still, his acting didn’t impress me. (But seriously, who’s watching this movie for the acting?)

His abs were great though.

The movie looks like it’s going to be way better than the book though. Not like that’s saying a whole lot, but the producers are trying really hard to make this movie legit.

Ha, ha, will I ever finish my book at this point?

Little Pieces of Bitter Candy

To get ready for the release of Bitter Candy (which I’m sure all of you are extremely excited about. Come on, anyone? No one? Imaginary audience, do you hear me? Anyone?

I think I hear the crickets chirping), I’m going to post little bits of the novel as I work towards finishing and editing it. Hopefully, on/before September 15, 2014!

Random quotes with no context whatsoever:

*Blood. There was so much blood, enough to swim in, to drown in. 

*“You’re getting your ass back in bed,” he said, picking her up and putting her on his comforter.

*“Okay, you keep mentioning these lethal weapons, but I really doubt that your parents would let you possess a machete and gun collection.”

*“Is it because you’re afraid I want to suck your dick?”

*“Here’s a suggestion—don’t be so resistant to my charms.”

Intrigued? Not? Thoughts?

ARCs of Bitter Candy

If you want an advanced reader copy of Bitter Candy, please feel free to contact me either through Goodreads or Fictionpress.

Goodreads: https://www.goodreads.com/author/show/8328704.Lily_Ableman

Fictionpress:

https://www.fictionpress.com/u/863403/lily-ableman

Or shoot me an email at lilyableman@gmail.com.

When you contact me, please add your email address and blog URL.

I don’t know when ARCs will be ready (yeah, I know, I’m a fucking mess), but hopefully, they will be ready before September 1.

And please note that there’s no guarantee you will get an ARC if you request one. I would love to give out ARCs to everyone who asks for one, but that might not be possible/the-best-business-decision.

Okay, I’ll get back to writing/procrastinating.

 

Hannibal

I’ve started watching Hannibal, and the show has never ceased to amaze me. IT’S SO GOOD.

And Mads Mikkelsen gives a great portrayal of Hannibal Lecter.

Maybe too great…

How I imagine meeting him would go:

First, I’ll scream like a fan-girl.

“OMG, YOU’RE FUCKING MADS MIKKELSEN! YOU’RE SUCH A GREAT ACTOR!”

Then I’ll think about the episode in which Hannibal literally tore open that doctor’s head. And then the episode in which he was preparing that poor girl’s lungs.

A different kind of screaming would ensue.

“PLEASE DON’T EAT ME! PLEASE DON’T BE OFFENDED BY MY SCREAMING AND RUNNING AWAY! YOU’RE JUST SUCH A GREAT ACTOR! AND FOR THE LOVE OF GOD, PLEASE DON’T PUNISH ME FOR MY RUDENESS!”

Because we all know how Hannibal Lecter handles rude people.

Cristiano Ronaldo

Is this guy for real?

I was bored, and I looked up Cristiano Ronaldo. And wow.

I don’t know whether to totally love this guy or curse his name.

I have to agree with a lot of his haters that he does come across as somewhat of a douche bag. Seriously, who builds a museum in his own honor? WITH HIS FUCKING FACE ALL OVER THE DOORS?

That hairstyle certainly doesn’t help. Seriously, how much hair gel is in that?

And the way he takes off his shirt after he scores a goal in a game that his team has already won? I mean, I don’t mind seeing his absolutely glorious abs, but kind of a douche move.

Then I read an article  about how he had security guards block his ex-girlfriend from him.

Wow.

But then I read about how philanthropic he is (he paid for a child’s operation costs and has contributed a lot of dough to various charities).

How can someone be so charitable AND so arrogant?

Well, I haven’t met the guy (obviously), so all of this could just be bullshit for all I know. He might be the world’s biggest dick or a real sweetheart.

Well, even if he is a dick…I have to say, the guy is hot.

 

Watching Washed Out’s Music Video for “Don’t Give Up”

Whoa, this music video is so trippy!

I feel like I’m high.

I mean, I feel like what I would imagine feeling high would be like because, ha, I don’t do drugs. I mean, that shit is illegal.

And I don’t do illegal things.

Songs for Today

1. Angel Haze – Black Dahlia

Whoa, forgiveness in rap music? Who would have thought?

2. Azealia Banks – 1991

Ah, yes, the whole Angel Haze vs. Azealia Banks feud… Honestly, I don’t know what’s all the beef about, but I do wish female musical artists would just get along. Come on, in a male-dominated world, let’s be nice to each other! And you two are both talented, so please focus on making music instead of petty tweets.

3. Mario – Directions

I think this song is adorable.

4. Washed Out – Don’t Give Up

The song I want to play when – okay, if I’m being real here, if (hey, I go to the University of Chicago) – I have sex.

5. Stromae - Bienvenue chez moi

Consequence of having hipster friends.

6. Ginga – Start Again

See number five.

7. Foxes – Beauty Queen

HER VOICE IS DIVINE.

8. Britney Spears and Madonna – Me Against the Music

9. Enrique Iglesias – Do You Know (The Ping Pong Song)

Who needs to sing when you look like that????

10. Shakira – Waka Waka (This Time for Africa)

This will always be the World Cup song for me!

BRAZIL 2014!

(Because the U.S. lost despite the awesomeness of Tim Howard. Tim Howard forever!)

Current Playlist

1. Infinite – The Chaser

I freaking love this song. So much passion in the vocals (well, as much passion as there can be in a manufactured K-pop band)!

2. Iggy Azalea featuring Charli XCX – Fancy

Shut up, this song is catchy.

3. Idina Menzel – Let it Go

I love Disney movies. Yeah, I’m 19. So fucking what?

4. Ingrid Michaelson – Ribbons

Goddess among women.

5. Ed Sheeran – Afire Love

No one can quite write a song like Ed.

6. Jenny Lewis – Rabbit Fur Coat

Such dark lyrics… I somehow love it.

7. Modest Mouse – Satin in a Coffin

Song for enemies?

8. Lana Del Rey – Ultraviolence

Another goddess among women.

9. The Weeknd – Kiss Land

To be honest, I think all of his songs sound kind of the same and they can be over-indulgently long…still have 40 songs from the guy!

10. The Vamps – Wild Heart

Catchy song. Yes, I listen to bands that are featured on Disney Channel.

11. Grimes – Genesis

Thank you, hipster friends.

Thoughts on Collide

Goodreads summary (with some edits from me):

A missed first encounter…

Colliding with a second chance…

On the heels of graduating college and trying to cope with her mother’s death, Emily Cooper moves to New York City for a fresh start.

While harboring secrets of his own (such as being an abusive alcoholic asshole and total slut), Dillon Parker takes care of Emily through her grief. Knowing he can’t live without her by his side, he’s sweet (what?), thoughtful (yeah, and I’m the fucking queen of Estonia) , and everything Emily has ever wanted in a man (you need to sort out your shit, girlfriend).

Until she meets Gavin Blake—a rich and notorious playboy who is dangerously sexy and charming as hell. Emily tries to deny the instant connection she feels, but Mr. Tall, Dark, and Handsome is not inclined to let go so easily (stalker alert!). Recovering from his own painful past, Gavin will stop at nothing to win Emily over.

This unexpected encounter compels Emily to question her decisions, forcing her to make a choice that will destroy friendships, shatter hearts, and forever change her life.

 

My valuable thoughts:

My third entry into the angst-filled and sex-crazy world of New Adult fiction. And like The Edge of Never and The Coincidence of Callie and Kayden, I found this book to be unremarkable.

But I have to say, Collide is my favorite NA novel (not like that’s saying much).

I paid $0.99 for this a while back. I didn’t regret shelling out $0.99 for the book as much as I regretted paying for The Edge of Never and The Coincidence of Callie and Kayden, but I still wish I spent the $0.99 on a candy bar instead of this angst-filled shit.

For the first 40%, I was fucking bored. The chemistry between Emily and Gavin – I didn’t fucking see it. And most of their conversations were DULL. Plus I didn’t think their conversations warranted so much laughing. Comedians, you two are not. Witty banter, your conversations are not.

And Emily, oh my God, she was so stupid.

The spineless moron can’t exist for a freaking second without a man, and why the hell did she accept Dillon’s obvious bullshit so easily but wouldn’t believe Gavin when he said he didn’t cheat on her?

And why did she get engaged to Dillon AGAIN when she knows he’s an abusive asshole? And when he has cheated on her multiple times, which is pretty much obvious to everyone but her moronic – or willingly fucking blind – ass?

UGH.

And how is this chick smart enough to teach?????

Now on to Dillon…

Seriously, I didn’t see one fucking reason why Emily stayed with this douche bag. Unless she’s a gold-digger. But as we are assured many times in this book, she’s so sweet and kind and cool that she wouldn’t date a guy just because he buys her expensive clothes and takes her out to fancy restaurants.

Seriously, Dillon was controlling, possessive, and abusive! He manhandled her and beat up a guy just because some guy touched her hand (all he wanted to do was see her engagement ring!) when Dillon slept around with probably multiple women behind her back.

And he had the audacity to tell her what to wear and to tell her who she could or couldn’t hang out with.

And Emily, the pathetic excuse for a human being, just accepts this shit.

On to Gavin…

I didn’t hate him. I kind of liked him (although I didn’t like how he almost took advantage of Emily when she was drunk). But the love at first sight shit was a bit too much for me. I can handle insta-love when it’s handled well enough, but it wasn’t really handled well here.

But the guy is kind of a pussy. I wish he fought dirtier for Emily. Come on, I know Dillon’s, like, your friend and all (even though I have no clue why), but if you know Dillon’s cheating on Emily and being an asshole, USE THAT INFORMATION AND GET THE STUPID GIRL.

Ya fucking pansy.

Anyway, this book did get better at 50%. A little too much angst and stupid misunderstandings for me, but I kept reading with some level of interest.

Won’t be reading the sequel though.

3 out of 5 stars

 

Reading Underworld by Meg Cabot

I love Meg Cabot. Like, LOVE HER. Like, the hugest girl-crush on her of all time.

I’ve read so many books from her. And enjoyed pretty much all of them. I’ve read The Princess Diaries series (including all of the short novellas!), the Airhead series (which I LOVE, despite my sister telling me that it’s just stupid and plain bad), Avalon High, Every Boy’s Got One, All-American Girl and even its sequel (the plot of which consisted of basically worrying about whether or not to do the dirty deed), and a lot of other books.

But this Abandon trilogy, this retelling of Persephone and Hades…

I’m disappointed.

Don’t get me wrong. I still enjoy it. I’ll probably end up giving Underworld, book 2 in the trilogy, four stars because hey, I’m enjoying it and it’s entertaining me.

BUT THERE’S SO MUCH WRONG WITH IT.

First off, Pierce, the heroine, if you could call her a heroine… She is so fucking stupid. Seriously, in every chapter, if not on every page, she’s doing something to make me groan. Crying because she felt bad at getting mad for her boyfriend (EVEN THOUGH SHE HAD EVERY RIGHT TO BE), knowingly acting like one of those brainless chicks in horror movies, questioning everything, etc.

Usually, I can tolerate a pretty good amount of stupidity, so if I’m groaning…oh, it’s bad.

Then the love interest…OH MY GOD, CAN I SAY ABUSIVE RELATIONSHIP? He doesn’t tell her shit, then gets mad at her when she gets mad about him not telling her important shit, and oh, when he gets mad, bad storms happen and possibly natural disasters.

Healthy relationship, this is not.

I’m surprised that Meg Cabot would write about such an unlikable hero and heroine. Yeah, her heroes and heroines usually have flaws, but I always find myself unable to help myself liking them and finding them endearing.

Some quotes that made me roll my eyes/curse/groan:

“Love. He loved me. Hearing that word fall so casually from his lips might help a little with the post-traumatic stress.” Right, because “love” from a controlling asshole fixes all of your problems.

“Sometimes when I got angry, bad things happened. People got hurt.

In the past, it had always been John who’d inflicted that pain.

This time when I got angry, it was John who got hurt.

Which was probably why…I was the one sobbing on the very same couch…I wasn’t crying because I hated him. I was crying because I hated myself.”

Oh, there are so many things wrong with this, I can’t even…

Red flag indicating that this is a very unhealthy relationship is waving frantically.

Her response when she found out that she’s in the news as a missing girl, presumed dead:

“Oh, no…Couldn’t they have found a better picture?”

YOU IS SO STUPID THAT I HAVE TO USE INCORRECT GRAMMAR TO MAKE MY POINT.

Her response when she found out that her dad’s offering a million-dollar award for information about her whereabouts:

“My dad’s company…was valued at several hundred times that. ‘That cheapskate.‘”

 

 

 

I still love you, Meg Cabot!