Chris Rodell's Blog, page 26
April 30, 2019
Hooray! It's Tweets of the Month time!
I have 1,605 Twitter followers @8days2Amish, but follow just 137. Many on Twitter have tens of thousands of followers simply by promising to follow back anyone who follows them. That’s not how I roll. I only follow all the very nicest people — for just as long as they continue to follow me.
And I’ll bet that smug, snarky remark is gonna cost me another dozen followers by the end of the
And I’ll bet that smug, snarky remark is gonna cost me another dozen followers by the end of the
April 26, 2019
I'm in a forgiving mood
(756 words)
I don’t know whether it’s spring, fresh memories of holy Easter or my optimistic disposition, but I’m in a forgiving mood.
I forgive Michael Richards. Me and my sweetheart were watching him play “Cosmo Kramer” on his coffee table/coffee book tour for maybe the kajillionth time and it was as hilarious as it was the first time. He’s done so much to make me so happy so I
I don’t know whether it’s spring, fresh memories of holy Easter or my optimistic disposition, but I’m in a forgiving mood.
I forgive Michael Richards. Me and my sweetheart were watching him play “Cosmo Kramer” on his coffee table/coffee book tour for maybe the kajillionth time and it was as hilarious as it was the first time. He’s done so much to make me so happy so I
April 25, 2019
Radical Honesty & #MeToo in "No Judgement Zone"
(756 words)
I was at Planet Fitness — the ballyhooed “No Judgement Zone!” — the other morning when I broke three unwritten rules in 20 seconds, any one of which could have led to my banishment.
First, I made eye contact with a pretty girl. What I’m about to say will sound preposterous to any member of the Greatest Generation, but making eye contact with a pretty girl today is the danger
I was at Planet Fitness — the ballyhooed “No Judgement Zone!” — the other morning when I broke three unwritten rules in 20 seconds, any one of which could have led to my banishment.
First, I made eye contact with a pretty girl. What I’m about to say will sound preposterous to any member of the Greatest Generation, but making eye contact with a pretty girl today is the danger
April 19, 2019
Seeing Satan in the smoke & the story of Daryl, the forgotten 13th Apostle
(724 words)
The tragic incineration of Notre Dame Cathedral had the faithful around the world peering through the smoke to see the faces of hope and redemption.
Not me.
I studied the smoke to see if I spy the face of — brace yourself —
Satan!
It’s a habit I picked up through years of reading the Weekly World News.
You can have “The Onion,” “Mad,” and other hipper sources
The tragic incineration of Notre Dame Cathedral had the faithful around the world peering through the smoke to see the faces of hope and redemption.
Not me.
I studied the smoke to see if I spy the face of — brace yourself —
Satan!
It’s a habit I picked up through years of reading the Weekly World News.
You can have “The Onion,” “Mad,” and other hipper sources
April 15, 2019
A reckoning for the inventor of styrofoam
(720 words)
Carl Georg Munters, the father of styrofoam, died on this day in 1989. News reports made no mention if his coffin was packed with form-fitting styrofoam to insulate his body on its journey to Hell.
The late Swede’s non-recyclable invention is the source of much environmental angst.
So is plastic, of course. But plastic — at least for now — gives responsible consumers the
Carl Georg Munters, the father of styrofoam, died on this day in 1989. News reports made no mention if his coffin was packed with form-fitting styrofoam to insulate his body on its journey to Hell.
The late Swede’s non-recyclable invention is the source of much environmental angst.
So is plastic, of course. But plastic — at least for now — gives responsible consumers the
April 9, 2019
"Us" movie & the perils of genius
(674 words)
Val and I walked entertained, but bewildered from the movie theater. We’d just seen the highly regarded new Jordan Peele horror flick, “Us.”
The movie is a huge critical and commercial success with 94 percent of Rotten Tomato critics declaring it a solid winner.
Val said she was eager to get on her computer to read informed explanations about what the hell happened in the
Val and I walked entertained, but bewildered from the movie theater. We’d just seen the highly regarded new Jordan Peele horror flick, “Us.”
The movie is a huge critical and commercial success with 94 percent of Rotten Tomato critics declaring it a solid winner.
Val said she was eager to get on her computer to read informed explanations about what the hell happened in the
April 5, 2019
Optimist gets world's worst rejection letter
(702 words)
In my evergreen attempts to gauge my occupational results (pathetic) versus my potential (monumental), I think I’ve settled on what kind of following I have. It is thus:
I have a cult following.
That sounds presumptuous until you consider the kind of cult writing like mine inspires.
My cult is polite, proper, has good posture and excels at things like living room “
In my evergreen attempts to gauge my occupational results (pathetic) versus my potential (monumental), I think I’ve settled on what kind of following I have. It is thus:
I have a cult following.
That sounds presumptuous until you consider the kind of cult writing like mine inspires.
My cult is polite, proper, has good posture and excels at things like living room “
April 2, 2019
Giving our hearts to Mick Jagger
(751 words)
My face bore a grave expression Sunday when I summoned the 12-year-old to the kitchen table. I took both her little hands in mine and looked her straight in the eye.
What was she doing tomorrow?
“Nothing.”
“Very good. Then I want to take you to the hospital to see if you can donate one of your heart valves to save the life of Mick Jagger.”
She teeters mostly on the
My face bore a grave expression Sunday when I summoned the 12-year-old to the kitchen table. I took both her little hands in mine and looked her straight in the eye.
What was she doing tomorrow?
“Nothing.”
“Very good. Then I want to take you to the hospital to see if you can donate one of your heart valves to save the life of Mick Jagger.”
She teeters mostly on the
April 1, 2019
April 1st not foolish enough (NOT a rerun*)
737 words)
America will be better off when people spend as much time preparing for April Fool’s Day as they do for stuffy holidays like Thanksgiving.
Everyone could take the day off. Instead of watching tedious professional football games we could watch reruns of shows like “Get Smart” and “3rd Rock From The Sun.”
We could still enjoy a big family feast, but mixed in amidst the
America will be better off when people spend as much time preparing for April Fool’s Day as they do for stuffy holidays like Thanksgiving.
Everyone could take the day off. Instead of watching tedious professional football games we could watch reruns of shows like “Get Smart” and “3rd Rock From The Sun.”
We could still enjoy a big family feast, but mixed in amidst the
March 31, 2019
Short but tweet; March tweets of the month
It was a paltry harvest this month, but a fairly nutritious yield. I don't know why I'm prolific some months (60-plus tweets) and others like this feeble (about 20). I am becoming more demanding. Yes, only the finest tweets make the cut at 8days2Amish!
• I may be wrong, but I have to believe there's at least one impostor '80's tribute band out there performing under the name, "Huey Lewis
• I may be wrong, but I have to believe there's at least one impostor '80's tribute band out there performing under the name, "Huey Lewis
