Chris Rodell's Blog, page 30
November 5, 2018
Deep sixing heart attack plans
(686 words)
My plan to engineer my own death through massive cardiac arrest has been deep sixed since I realized my heart just isn’t in it. And you can’t nurture a future heart attack without a whole lot of heart.
I guess this mindset is common for people who are given an unfortunate diagnosis or hit with a sudden situational forlornness. We read the fateful end game and say, no thanks,
My plan to engineer my own death through massive cardiac arrest has been deep sixed since I realized my heart just isn’t in it. And you can’t nurture a future heart attack without a whole lot of heart.
I guess this mindset is common for people who are given an unfortunate diagnosis or hit with a sudden situational forlornness. We read the fateful end game and say, no thanks,
November 1, 2018
Biblical sorts of praise for my book, me
(680 words)
I can’t help but wonder if worshippers at a Murrysville Presbyterian church who’d filled the pews eager to bask in the word of God felt spiritual distress when the Almighty was pre-empted by the word of Rodell.
A pastor told me he’d devoted his Sunday sermon to my Arnold Palmer book.
To me, it would have been like expecting the victorious team to douse you with a big jug
I can’t help but wonder if worshippers at a Murrysville Presbyterian church who’d filled the pews eager to bask in the word of God felt spiritual distress when the Almighty was pre-empted by the word of Rodell.
A pastor told me he’d devoted his Sunday sermon to my Arnold Palmer book.
To me, it would have been like expecting the victorious team to douse you with a big jug
October 31, 2018
Twick 'r Tweet: My best from last two months
I was nervous yesterday about posting the one about Bob Nutting and the Pirates — it’s fourth from the bottom here — being partially to blame for the unspeakable weekend violence. But -- damn the torpedoes -- I posted it anyway just because I thought it was damn funny. I apologize if anyone thought the timing was poor. But with so much random violence happening everyday I don’t believe
October 29, 2018
It's mourning again in America
(565 words)
I was on the verge of posting something I thought was funny this weekend when I wondered about the tastefulness of trying to provoke laughter when so many of my Pittsburgh friends are bereft.
I asked my friend John. He advised me to wait until at least Tuesday before resuming any on-line silliness. “Any sooner than that,” he said, “and you risk looking like a callous jerk.”
I was on the verge of posting something I thought was funny this weekend when I wondered about the tastefulness of trying to provoke laughter when so many of my Pittsburgh friends are bereft.
I asked my friend John. He advised me to wait until at least Tuesday before resuming any on-line silliness. “Any sooner than that,” he said, “and you risk looking like a callous jerk.”
October 26, 2018
I'm now hosting Tin Lizzy holiday book luncheons
(740 words)
One of my favorite things about working at the Tin Lizzy is pretending I own the Tin Lizzy.
This usually happens when Buck, the actual owner since 1980, is conducting bar business with some unsuspecting vendor, inspector or job applicant in one of the many unoccupied second or third floor rooms within earshot of my office.
I storm into the conversation and begin profanely
One of my favorite things about working at the Tin Lizzy is pretending I own the Tin Lizzy.
This usually happens when Buck, the actual owner since 1980, is conducting bar business with some unsuspecting vendor, inspector or job applicant in one of the many unoccupied second or third floor rooms within earshot of my office.
I storm into the conversation and begin profanely
October 20, 2018
Thumb's down "First Man" movie review (w/ some spoilers)
(489 words)
The pressure was too enormous to be contained. The once-ignited gaseous elements demanded release. Lift-off would be achieved.
3 … 2 … 1 …
I’d just endured 138 minutes of “First Man.” I enjoyed the movie, and would have enjoyed it more had I not made the ill-considered decision to consume a heaping plate of refried beans at Don Patron’s just prior to show time.
The pressure was too enormous to be contained. The once-ignited gaseous elements demanded release. Lift-off would be achieved.
3 … 2 … 1 …
I’d just endured 138 minutes of “First Man.” I enjoyed the movie, and would have enjoyed it more had I not made the ill-considered decision to consume a heaping plate of refried beans at Don Patron’s just prior to show time.
October 12, 2018
Leading leaders in search of food, my swagger
(573 words)
It was the most poorly planned quasi-military exercise since Bay of Pigs. We were on a mission to find the food at the Greensburg-area banquet hall destined to be forever known as The Place that Used to be Known as the Bishop Connare Center.
To give you some idea how preposterous it was, I was the leader.
Some context: I was brought in to speak to about 50 esteemed
It was the most poorly planned quasi-military exercise since Bay of Pigs. We were on a mission to find the food at the Greensburg-area banquet hall destined to be forever known as The Place that Used to be Known as the Bishop Connare Center.
To give you some idea how preposterous it was, I was the leader.
Some context: I was brought in to speak to about 50 esteemed
October 8, 2018
My doctor wants to be my friend
(641 words)
I was a bit startled when during a routine exam the doctor said he considers me a friend and began confiding details of a failed marriage.
I confess I was relieved he at the time didn’t have anything jammed up my ass.
And I didn’t have anything jammed up his!
I like it when anyone says they consider me a friend. I always make a mental note to keep my new friend in mind
I was a bit startled when during a routine exam the doctor said he considers me a friend and began confiding details of a failed marriage.
I confess I was relieved he at the time didn’t have anything jammed up my ass.
And I didn’t have anything jammed up his!
I like it when anyone says they consider me a friend. I always make a mental note to keep my new friend in mind
October 3, 2018
I'm drinking too much & it's all your fault!
(651 words)
First of all, this is NOT about Judge Kavanaugh or his drinking. The only experiences we share are that he admits he got drunk on beer and blacked out and so did I.
The difference is he meant in high school.
I mean most every Wednesday through Friday since high school.
Many prudent drinkers downplay how much alcohol they’ve consumed.
Me, I tend to romanticize it. A
First of all, this is NOT about Judge Kavanaugh or his drinking. The only experiences we share are that he admits he got drunk on beer and blacked out and so did I.
The difference is he meant in high school.
I mean most every Wednesday through Friday since high school.
Many prudent drinkers downplay how much alcohol they’ve consumed.
Me, I tend to romanticize it. A
September 28, 2018
I had a really bad time at Laurel Valley this week
(704 words)
Take a moment to let that headline sink in. I believe it is without precedent. No one’s ever had a bad time at Laurel Valley, the posh Ligonier country club and home to one of America’s top 100 golf courses.
Let me be more specific. When I say I had a bad time at Laurel, the bad time lasted fewer than 7 minutes.
The rest of the time — nearly 20 hours — was absolutely
Take a moment to let that headline sink in. I believe it is without precedent. No one’s ever had a bad time at Laurel Valley, the posh Ligonier country club and home to one of America’s top 100 golf courses.
Let me be more specific. When I say I had a bad time at Laurel, the bad time lasted fewer than 7 minutes.
The rest of the time — nearly 20 hours — was absolutely
