Akosua Dardaine Edwards's Blog, page 170

Off da plane on da stage

We are not educated to be. We are educated to aquire, tell a different story

Often the most important work you have to do don't look like work at all
off the plane on the stage
I have a responsibility......

I was scheduled to speak at the Moruga Secondary Graduation - Moruga is a rural town in the south of Trinidad, I have never been, took me about two and a half hours driving, I even got lost, drove to the end of the island- literally- I drove to the end and it was only sea, no where else to go!
I had fun, it was so inspiring to be around possibility, potential, and promise
I am so grateful

Congratulations to all of you and thank you for having me share lessons on the journey
Peace

Charged Up

Somehow the wires uncrossed, my tables were turned
Never knew I had such a lesson to learn I'm feelin' good from my head to my shoes
Know where I'm goin' and I know what to do
I tidied it up my point of view
I got a new attitude! Patti LaBelle

My batteries are recharged,there will be actions taken, decisions madeI  can see now that I was almost running on empty - these few days have been a welcomed boost, a combination of seeing my family and taking in the workshops- the soul surgery, the affirmation of my purpose, the love shared
Everywhere we turned this weekend  there were people like you and I  who got the courage to live their dream, live their purpose, be authentic, tell the truth, deal with their issues - the message rang through as the same- just do it, go through the challenges, come out on the other side, be your authentic you, tell the truth, be prepared to lose a few along the way, it's really going to be alright!
I want to share it with youHave a super dayPeace
 

Day 5 NOLA

I am the women of my dreams; each stage of growth, a woman unapologetically herself has emerged. This becoming myself is a process . Ijeoma

Well what have we here? We arrive in time to get our seats for the day's workshop and there was a buzz about, there were extra security, there were loads and loads of people, I went to the front to get my seat, ushers appeared and said I will not be able to sit there today. 
"Huh?" 
"You cannot sit here today Ma'am it's reserved"
"Since when?"
"Since Oprah is speaking today"
Oprah? Are you sure?
Yes Maam

Well no problem let me just get back one seat
My cousins and I were like OMG he said Oprah! We started acting like pure groupies, jumping and screaming like kids

The Empowerment Experience as it was called was pure joy, exactly what I needed to hear
To Lean into the dream
To Let it go, surrender when you have done all the work and prayed
To set your intentions from the onset
To define your own terms
To always be you, authenticity is the best thing ever
Man, I sure did choose the right time to be there to get this message and I want to now share it with you

Thank you Ms Oprah

Peace

Day 3 NOLA

Taking myself seriously doesn’t mean not making any more mistakes. It doesn’t mean being perfect. It doesn’t mean having it all together.
But it does mean taking my foot off the break when my intention is to accelerate.
It does mean putting a lid on my knee jerk self-deprecation and downplaying.
It does mean expressing something with gravitas and then shutting up to let it land . Kate Northrup
It's the flip side! New Orleans is soul surgery not just because of the awe inspiring workshops that I have attended so far, that coupled with being with my cousins have woken up something inside of me that fell into a long deep sleep. 
I grew up with 8 of my cousins, in the same house either living with them or them being at the house daily after school until they were picked up by their folks, we were all close in age and a few "only" children in the mix. We were our own little gang of buddies until at about age ten or so we all either moved or went abroad, time passed we grew up and grew opinions and judgments and had fights and lives that excluded one another - Life happens!Until the proverbial shit hit fan and one of the 8 buddies died before even hitting a good 35 years old - well that certainly was a wake up call. We decided to make an effort to be in each other's lives once more as much as possible - technology also helps big time. And so, these few days I have had an opportunity to spend time with these ladies who I am so proud of not just for their academic and career accomplishments but because of the people they have become- I am learning here about acceptance, authenticity, lack of judgement and not taking myself so serious. I really just ought to be ME!It is said that your family relationships are the container for growth and healing - it is the place where the the majority of our lessons and most importantly you choose which family you are born into to learn what you need to learn (yeah that's some high heights there right??) Day 3 and onto see - in person- one of my favourite's the incomparable Ms Iyanla!Give thanksAkosua

If you just let it

What you want might make you cry
What you need might pass you by
If you don't catch it 
And what you need ironically Will turn out what you want to be
If you just let it  Lauren Hill

I am preparing to hit New Orleans tomorrow, looking forward to it for a number of reasons, to refill my spiritual cup, to spend some time with my family and to be among my peers, people speaking the same language and understanding my own path as they walk along similar ones.

I have a packed few days filled with workshops facilitated by some of the best writers, spiritual coaches, life coaches, and others who are willing to share their stories. And then there is a little bit of partying after- gotta keep the balance!
The party with a purpose they call it
I am willing myself better, I am showing up, open mind and willing spirit.
Catch you on the other side
Peace

All healing is release from the past

 ACIM

As you shake your head No and point at all the people you can blame for what is going on with you, you miss another divine opportunity to examine what is really going on within you
Until you are willing to accept total and complete responsibility for your life, your life will keep sending you experiences designed to get your attention"
 I would read this every day a few years ago, to remind myself to take responsibility for me rather than looking for someone to blame and outsourcing my happiness
I would recite it in the morning out loud, in front the mirror because when I look into my eyes I know there is nothing worse than breaking a committment to me
I was reminded of it today, by chance - awww no not at all- there is no chance

I have been stressing out for the past few weeks, I have been worrying, I have been blaming and outsourcing my responsibility and life sent me an experience. I got ill! Now, I hardly ever get ill because I let out the stress, I find a way to deal with my emotions in a healthy way- I was tired, I was just plain ole tired and I forgot how much power I possess, I forgot about the light that never dims
So I got sick, like struck down in bed kind of thing and my over thinking kicked in, and I felt worse, the what if's came to get me and they got me
What if - no one knew I was ill and I stay here and turn to bones
What if - I starve because I have no food
What if - I get thirsty
What if - I can just stay here
What if - I never have anyone to take care of me when I am ill
Oh my the what if's were tormenting me

And then, the good sense God gave me returned! Accepting responsibility means examining the choices made, and free will means that I can change my mind anytime
It also means take a rest, lay down and rest, the brain is tired 'Put yourself in the centre of your life and accept full responsibility for all things that may be spinning out of control and then move
I'm resting this week, salyed the what if's and taking it easy
Peace

Say it kindly

In my own experience – and listening to others – what people really want is peace, love and happiness. They want to wake up each day and know they do matter, that they are and will always be okay regardless of what they have to face in life . Dawn Barclay

One of my favorite lessons - everyone matters!

Simple

Aren't the best things ever in life just really really simple?

Whoever they are, whatever circumstances that they are in, they have a part to play in the Universe and they matter.

Now, I interpreted that also to mean that you can matter to me from afar - which is to say I can love and respect you from a distance.
I also interpreted it to mean that every person who enters my space I give to them the respect that they deserve as a person who matters, how I speak to them, how I respond to them, how I show them that they have my attention in the time that they are in my own space
I have been practicing this.
Iyanla (the boss) says before you say something, ask yourself
1. Is it kind
2. Is it loving
3. Is it necessary
4. Can you say it in a way in which you would want to hear it?

Oh I would add that sometimes no is one of the most loving things that you can say! (day it kindly as ever!)

I have a few things that I want to tell a few people today, and so here I go!
Note to self: Everyone matters and remember to be kind
Peace

Being all in

Being all in is you committing to your decisions whether or not they work out the way you planned.  Dawn Moxie


Big picture thinking is one thing I am happy to have learnt. This comes from knowing what you want, having a clear vision. When you have the big picture, the clear vision. you are committed to making decisions and taking massive action to get there - it's almost like this - the how comes along as you go along.
Getting to the corner, I can take a car, bus, walk, run, crawl - my big picture is getting to the corner. We get bogged down in the how. We look at what is in front of us and what has happened with other people - we want evidence, we want validation from friends, family and loved ones, we want a pat on the back, we want status quo, we want to be talked about positively- good luck with that homies!

All of the  amazing and awesome things that happened, that have been invented, that we use is through someone trusting and moving forward not knowing how
I let the how blow my mind because it always does, its quite exciting really - tuning out the naysayers is harder
I wanted to share my story I didn't know how
I wanted to travel I didn't know how

But it happened
It wasn't always easy what kept me going in the vision, the commitment the discipline and knowing that the how is not up to me
all roads lead to God
All
and all things are lessons that God would have us learn

Protect Yourself

"This is your journey. You are learning to trust yourself, and it has nothing to do with how someone else chooses to respond or not respond" Iyanla Vanzant
Sharing information and giving my point of view whilst maintaining my boundaries  - A major lesson for me that I must admit I am at the back of the class. I have been practicing and practicing and sharing and listening on this topic over the last week, and it's true for me that practice makes masters! So I continue to practice.
Setting and maintaining personal boundaries is all about trusting ourselves to know that no matter what we can be seen, be heard and be okay with others having their own boundaries. Choosing is also so important, the lovely free will that the Universe have given us to exercise come what may!I can choose again!
Personal Boundaries aren’t aggressive, they aren’t ‘My way or no way’, ‘This way, or else’.They aren’t a threat. They aren’t about control.
They are certainly not about power over. But they are about shared personal power.
They aren’t manipulation, bullying, aggression or coercion.
But they are about protection: physically, physiologically and emotionally.

We all have the right to state clearly what behaviours we will and won’t allow in our lives. That means, perhaps for your own protection (and protection of the other individual), there may be relationships that simply cannot exist in to protect your own health and well-being.

Health and well being is holistic here, if you are being physically abused- time to set some new boundaries and choose again, if you are being emotionally abused ditto
If you are willingly sleeping with someone else's partner - your health is also at risk because in truth and in fact, you are sleeping with all of them as well, chances are you don't know  the state of their physical health.
Well being is your peace of mind, if you aren't physically healthy, your peace of mind will also be shot to pieces

Peace! 

Stalling tactics

While you are stalling and flapping around with tiny details that aren’t quite right to you, to the rest of us they are fine. You are not only robbing yourself of your own sanity and confidence, you are also robbing the world of what you can create, do and be.
Stop stalling.
Do it or don’t.
Commitment is not the same as trying. Dawn Barclay


The main reason for stalling is fear
Stalling is just what it is- waiting and waiting and waiting to act.
A big ole waiting game

Stop stalling.If you want to launch your website but you aren’t 100% happy with the font because it’s not quite right, you’re stalling or perhaps scared of what others might think when you shove it out here, or both.If you’re waiting until your children are in school before you pick up the pen and start creative writing again, you’re stalling.If you’re always doing things for others because you can’t get started on your own stuff, you’re stalling and probably avoiding.If you want to change career from the one that sucks your soul to the one that makes sense and fits your core values, but you’ve never even asked yourself what your values are, you’re stalling and not taking accountability for your happiness.If you’re persistently looking about, seeing ideas that are successful for others, and change yours to look exactly like theirs because you aren’t confident in your own uniqueness or it’s not quite right, you’re stalling and also comparing your outer world to another’s outer show.If you constantly have repeating ideas you would like to start, and you are forever putting them on the back-burning, you’re stalling.If you’re always planning, analysing and never doing, you’re stalling.If you’re always looking outside for confirmation that you’re doing a good job, you’re stalling and need to work on your own self-worth.If you’re always talking about what you are going to do when … or one day maybe, you either don’t have strong goals or you’re stalling.If you’re persistently watching on the sidelines with something really valuable to say, but you never speak up, you’re stalling.If you arrive at a training course with the mindset you will never learn anything, you’re wasting your time and you’re stalling.If you read hundreds of blogs weekly and wish you could start one, you’re just wishing and stalling.If you’re constantly jumping on the next shiny new bandwagon for your business because you think you are missing out, you’re stalling.If you’re supposed to be marketing your business and you are watching cat videos on YouTube, you’re stalling.If you’re not happy in your significant relationship and you are scared to have difficult conversations that ultimately will help you grow (regardless of the outcome), you are stalling and probably building a bomb that will explode one day.If you’re sitting on a project that has your heart and soul behind it and will make a difference in lives of others and your worried about what those two people will say you met 10 years ago when they see you talk about on Facebook, you’re stalling and are bothered too much about what others think. (Hint: they don’t actually care! You probably aren’t that special to them.)If you’re meant to be writing an essay, article, piece of work and you’re putting in another load to the washing machine, you’re stalling.If you’re trying to cram one week of work into a day because you couldn’t be bothered the other 4 days, you’ve stalled.Stop StallingPeace