David S. Atkinson's Blog, page 278

Opinions Yet Again Creep Into Journalism: Boy Calls 911 In Attempt To Avoid Bedtime

I was reading this article about a Massachusetts boy who called 911 in an attempt to avoid his bedtime and was reminded of how opinions sometimes creep into journalism. I’d give you the background, but I pretty much already did. The 10-year old boy didn’t want to go to bed when his mom wanted him to and he called the cops.

So where does the opinion come in? Well, the article states that: “There was no emergency.” If that isn’t opinion, I don’t know what is (and I might not).

Certainly, this was a case where there was not an appropriate emergency that justified calling 911. However, is it strictly true that there wasn’t an emergency? Or, was it just the case that there was not an emergency from the perspective of the journalist (as well as the police and most adults)?

Personally, I wouldn’t have called this an emergency, but I’m not this particular little boy. His mom was forcing him to go to bed, right then. He didn’t want to go to bed. It seems like this could count as an emergency for him. Absent assistance, he was probably going to have to go to bed at that point.

Now, I am not saying that this boy should have called the cops…but whether or not there was an emergency depends on your perspective. As such, stating that there was not an emergency amounts to an opinion. Just saying.

For A Moment I Thought Chic-fil-A Had Radically Changed Their Stance On Things: Pirate Princess Night

I was going by a Chic-fil-A the other night and I swear I saw a sign that said “Pirate Princess Night.” For a moment, I thought Chic-fil-A had radically changed their stance on a few issues. However, then I got a better look at the sign:

Turns out, it actually said “Pirate and Princess Night.” I don’t know what that is, but it’s probably just some kids night thing. Harmless enough, I’m sure. “Pirate and Princess Night” is definitely different from “Pirate Princess Night.” That “and” makes a huge difference.

I mean, “Pirate Princess Night” immediately had me thinking of Kathy Acker, particularly of Pussy, King of the Pirates. I haven’t read that particular Acker as of yet, but I intend to and the things I imagined in connection with “Pirate Princess Night” were pretty similar to what I imagined in connection with Pussy, King of the Pirates. And, though I still intend to read Pussy, King of the Pirates, I probably won’t be going to “Pirate and Princess Night.”

Though, I wasn’t surprised to realize my mistake. I heard Chic-fil-A modified their stance on a few issues…but I was doubting that they’d modified them THAT far.

At Least My Local Chinese Place Didn’t Shoot And/or Club It’s Wife Mistaking Her For A Home Invader

I’ve been complaining for the last three days about the place my wife and I got Chinese takeout from recently (Americanized Chinese), but I should really keep this in perspective. Their food is actually pretty good…and at least the restaurant didn’t shoot and/or club its girlfriend with a cricket bat and then try to say it had mistaken her for a home invader.

There’s always that, right?

The other stuff is pretty light stuff I can live with. I can live with getting normal pork instead of BBQ pork in my garlic pork. I can deal with excess fortune cookies (even if I don’t know who the fortune applies to. I can deal with the fact that they still don’t serve chop suey. If the restaurant had murdered its girlfriend claiming to have mistaken her for a burglar, then that would be a real problem.

I should just count myself lucky that my problems are so minor. There are real problems out there and I should be thankful I don’t have them. That doesn’t mean that the things that bug me aren’t legitimate bugging things (though it doesn’t mean that they are either), just that things could be much worse.

Keep in mind, I’ll still be going to the restaurant. I wouldn’t be if the ‘girlfriend thing’ happened.

I’m Also Pissed That The Chinese Place My Wife And I Got Food From Recently Doesn’t Have Chop Suey

It occurred to me that I’ve spent the last two days complaining about the place that my wife and I got Chinese (Americanized Chinese) from recently and didn’t even complain about the fact that they don’t have chop suey. I’ve complained about the Denver chop suey situation before, but not about this place in specific.

As such, consider the complaint entered.

I’ve mentioned before, Denver is a terrible place to try to find chop suey. In almost five years, I’ve only found one place that carries it. The place near my house, the place my wife likes to go for takeout, does not have chop suey.

I know, chop suey is not a particularly good dish. I don’t think it’s even real Chinese food at all. If I’m not mistaken, it’s an Americanized Chinese food invention. Regardless, I’ve always been a big fan. I don’t know why, but I love chop suey. This is a problem in Denver given that it is almost impossible to find.

Remember my complaint about this place promised me BBQ pork in my garlic pork and it wasn’t there? That wouldn’t have been a problem if they’d had chop suey. I would have ordered that instead and never encountered the BBQ swindle. But, they don’t. Therefore, both complaints are officially lodged.

Mind you, I’m not actually going to say the name of the place we got takeout from. It really isn’t their fault that they don’t have chop suey. Well…maybe it is, but I’m sure they would if they had the demand for it. My demand probably isn’t enough.

The Problem Of Odd Numbers Of Fortunes

I mentioned yesterday that my wife and I recently got takeout Chinese food (Americanized Chinese food). As one would expect with Americanized Chinese food, a number of fortune cookies were tossed in with our order. We ordered two dinners. We received three fortune cookies. Perhaps you can see the problem.

Now, my wife and I aren’t real concerned about the fortune cookies. We don’t really like them. This isn’t about that.

The problem is figuring out who the extra fortune goes to. Obviously, we could each pick one and know whose fortune was whose (we didn’t get good ones). However, who does the third fortune apply to? We didn’t even want the cookie; we just don’t know how fate wants us to handle the extra.

My temptation was to let my wife have the extra cookie. This is what I did with the one almond cookie that was also in the bag (note: my wife did not give me a choice about this and did not mention the presence of the fortune cookie, but I saw it and didn’t say anything). But, what if the fortune is bad?

Does the fortune in the third cookie apply to my wife? Does it apply to me? We just don’t know. We both left it sit out on the counter. It’ll probably get tossed in the trash at some point. We don’t like to be wasteful…but why tempt fate?

I’m just not sure why the restaurant put in three fortune cookies when we ordered two dinners. I’m sure they were just tossing a bunch of extra stuff in the bag, but it caused fate-related problems. I’m just not sure how I should best have handled it. It would have been better if they’d just tossed in an extra almond cookie instead.

Don’t Lie About BBQ Pork

My wife and I had Chinese (Americanized Chinese) food takeout the other night and I have something to say as a result of that. What I have to say is that no one should lie about BBQ pork. Not ever. Just don’t do it.

I was going through the menu when we phoned in our order before going to pick it up. I had decided to get the garlic chicken. However, I then noticed that the menu said that the restaurant used their BBQ pork in their garlic pork. I immediately switched my order to that.

You see, I love Chinese (at least, Americanized Chinese) BBQ pork. You know the stuff, it comes in slices and is outlined in a vibrant red. I don’t know if that is a result of smoking, or what it results from exactly, but it is delicious. This is the entire reason I changed my order.

However, when I opened my garlic chicken, I only found normal pork. There was no vibrant red outlining. It wasn’t the same.

Of course, it was still good…it just wasn’t what I had been expecting. As a result, I was disappointed. Worse, my wife’s meal DID come with actual BBQ pork. This resulted in some tension as I attempted to steal bits from her dinner.

As such, I thought I should take a moment to tell restaurants of the world: don’t lie and say a dish has Chinese BBQ pork in it if it doesn’t. At the very least, people will be unhappy. At the worst, undue strain could be placed on marriages. It just isn’t worth it. Don’t lie.

Let’s Look At The Cymbal Monkey For No Particular Reason

I was going to write a post for today. I really was. However, instead of an actual post today, let’s just sit and look at the cymbal monkey:

Watch it once. Watch it twice. Watch it again and again. Everyone loves cymbal monkey. Monkey! Monkey! Monkey! Monkey! Monkey! It pulls you in. It sucks your life force dry. It makes you ignore anything else in your life.

Truly, it is the perfect entertainment.

Support Independent Bookstores And Buy “Bones Buried in the Dirt” From Tattered Cover

You hear a lot about how we should support independent bookstores. I definitely agree with that, and do it all I can. You should think about doing your part. Particularly, you should think about buying my book, Bones Buried in the Dirt, from Tattered Cover. That’d be a good start.

Mega stores such as Amazon have made buying books and such very convenient, but they have so much power that they can choose what books you are able to choose from and what authors/publishers get for those books. Keeping independents alive is the only other choice you have, and it really is a choice. If you don’t like the practices that the mega stores engage in, perhaps you should think about buying my book, Bones Buried in the Dirt, from Tattered Cover.

Now, some people might think that I’m trying to exploit people’s feelings about this issue to sell books. That might, in fact, be the case. Touché, in fact. Regardless, you can buy my book on Amazon or from Tattered Cover. Just remember that you would be supporting an independent bookstore if you bought it from Tattered Cover.

Heck, I’m just happy if people are reading it.

Don’t Hit The Baby

I know that I am not the most patient person with other people’s children. I know this. I don’t have kids of my own and probably haven’t learned to be as patient as I should be with young kids. Still, I still can’t wrap my mind around the fact that Joe Rickey Hundley allegedly smacked a toddler on a Delta flight.

Seriously, this guy apparently hit a toddler because the kid wouldn’t stop crying on descent. I just can’t imagine. Admittedly, I know crying kids are irritating. I know this, but I’ve never come anywhere near close to hitting one.

Frankly, it’s usually good enough for me if the parents are even trying to comfort the child. Babies are going to cry, particularly during pressure changes in takeoff and landing. It may hurt my ears to hear it, but there’s only so much that can be done. As long as the parents aren’t just neglecting their kid, whether they are successful, in my view they are doing as much as anyone could ask. Regardless, even if the kid is crying and the parents are doing nothing, I still would never hit the kid.

Besides, does anyone honestly think that hitting a child is going to stop crying? Or yelling at the child? Doesn’t it seem like children probably START crying when someone hits or yells at them? Seems like a dumb plan even beyond being morally repulsive.

But, Joe Rickey Hundley apparently didn’t share that view. He apparently smacked the toddler hard enough to cause bruising and such. This was after allegedly yelling a racial slur regarding the child. Of course, this guy has been fired from his executive job at AGC Aerospace and Defense, Composites Group. He’s also been charged with assault.

I just can’t believe this guy did something like that. I may get irritated by kids sometimes, but I’d never do something like that.

CHICKEN KILLER, YOU HAVE WOUNDED MY HEART FOREVER!

I have to say, “CHICKEN KILLER, YOU HAVE WOUNDED MY HEART FOREVER!” is one of my favorite quotes of all time. If you are lucky, you’ll recognize this from the novel Hollywood by Charles Bukowski. If you don’t recognize it, you may want to give it a read.

Mind you, Hollywood isn’t my favorite Bukowski. It’s a novel he wrote about the debacle behind how the movie Barfly got made. It’s not his best, but it’s still good. And, of course, “CHICKEN KILLER, YOU HAVE WOUNDED MY HEART FOREVER!” is still one of my favorite quotes of all time, whether or not it comes from one of my favorite Bukowski books.

You’d think I’d explain where this quote came from, or the context behind it, but I’m not going to. I’m just laying the quote out there: “CHICKEN KILLER, YOU HAVE WOUNDED MY HEART FOREVER!” If you want to find out what the quote is all about, you’ll have to read Hollywood for yourself.