Pat Hatt's Blog, page 3

Time To Keep Kicking

 

Sitting pretty but not at ease.Swaying in the subtle breeze.Fearing the return is coming.Hearing that familiar humming.
Kick. Kick. Kick.It doesn't have to stick.Life will come and life will go.In the end you'll learn and grow.

On the outside looking in,Always waiting to begin.

Kick. Kick. Kick.It doesn't have to stick.Life will come and life will go.In the end you'll learn and grow.

At the end of the road.Carrying a heavy load.

Kick. Kick. Kick.It doesn't have to stick.Life will come and life will go.In the end you'll learn and grow.

The path is long and rough.One step closer ain't enough.

Kick. Kick. Kick.It doesn't have to stick.Life will come and life will go.In the end you'll learn and grow.

White and frozen as the snow and ice.Sometimes you have to roll the dice.

Kick. Kick. Kick.It doesn't have to stick.Life will come and life will go.In the end you'll learn and grow.

Out on a ledge and ready to drop.Things just never seem to stop.

Kick. Kick. Kick.It doesn't have to stick.Life will come and life will go.In the end you'll learn and grow.

A hole dug deeper with each passing day.In a loop on continuous replay.

Kick. Kick. Kick.It doesn't have to stick.Life will come and life will go.In the end you'll learn and grow.

Reaching reaching but never there.A crack of light not even to spare.

Kick. Kick. Kick.It doesn't have to stick.Life will come and life will go.In the end you'll learn and grow.

Stuck above with many below.How you got there you don't know.

Kick. Kick. Kick.It doesn't have to stick.Life will come and life will go.In the end you'll learn and grow.

Water ripples circle from far away.The shallow end now on display.

Kick. Kick. Kick.It doesn't have to stick.Life will come and life will go.In the end you'll learn and grow.

Sitting pretty but not at ease.Swaying in the subtle breeze.Knowing the return is thereBut that you have strength to spare.
Kick. Kick. Kick.It doesn't have to stick.Life will come and life will go.In the end you'll learn and grow.
There you go. Does it have flow? The cat thought about ducks kicking and this came out. Especially after Pat and the tiny humans watched them when out and about. I'd like to chew on one at our sea. What? Don't judge me? Ever just keep going at your place? Sure something that we embrace. The crap shall always pile, mile by mile by mile by mile, but can't let it give you gas. Just a thought from my little rhyming ass.
Enjoy life, forget the strife.

Time For The Why

 

Here today we are going to ask why. I guess that would mean I am going to ask why. Or that would mean I am going to ask why that someone else asked. I guess why is just getting passed along. Why do you have to be so fickle why? Why am I talking to something that will never talk back? Unless Skynet comes into play and then why may talk back. Hmmm that probably still wouldn't work. I guess why is still crap outta luck. If there was such a thing as luck. Why must humans make stuff up? Why aren't I getting on with it yet? I better, huh? But why?

Albert Camus once said, “The purpose of a writer is to keep civilization from destroying itself.” Flannery O’Conner said, “I write to discover what I know.” Authors across time and distance have had many reasons to write. Why do you write what you write? 

This one is easy. I write so the aliens will see I can spin a good tale and keep them entertained. Then they will only beam me up and not probe me or disintegrate me. Then they will see they are so good that they will give me ever lasting life and then I will bide my time and then wait for the right moment and then blow them all up. Except for my alien wife and our half alien babies. I'll save them. Then we'll steal a ship and go cruise around space for a few billion years. After that I may write a new book or two and come back to Earth and see if humans came back around again. 

So there you go. That is why I write. Not something is simple as because I have 1000s of stories in my head that want to come out. Nope. Never. It is all to survive the impending alien attack. I've got plenty of tinfoil saved in the closet just in case it backfires though. 

Why do you write? Why do you blog if you don't write? Why wouldn't that count as writing? Why must why ask so many questions? Are you ready for the aliens? Hey. No more make believe than luck. You won't be laughing when you are being probed. What? I'll go write another story now.

Enjoy life, forget the strife.

Time For A New View!

 

Do you see this? Do you see what Pat did? He put all kinds of things up there now? After the cat did all the work on the blog, now he thinks that he should get to share. There are even mutts and tiny humans. 

He should be relegated to scribe.

Or on the end of the rock.

Or with a bunch of weirdos.

Or pretending to do good while I really did all the work.

Or being a hillbilly.

Or...nah....skip this one.

Or just posing.

Or sitting in the giant litterbox where I just used it.

Or sitting in the background while I rule the world.

But oh no. He had to go and do this. He even put himself in the middle. As if. I need to find a new human.
What do you think of the new header? Do you remember the glory days of the old ones? Are you as disgusted with Pat as me? Pat Hatt Time branding he says. Pfffft I'll brand him with a new scar. Am I overreacting? I am there 6 times. More than anyone. So I suppose deep down he still knows I'm the true ruler. 
Enjoy life, forget the strife.

Time For An Easy As That

 

The cat got questioned a little while ago. Yeah. They wondered why their star didn't grow. They created a blog and posted. They couldn't believe it wasn't great because they hosted. No comments or views. They thought this was news. Ignore and block got hit. I don't have time for their umm egotistical spit. But I have time for this rhyme. Can do it any old time.
Here they flock.Here they squawk.Birds of a feather.No matter the weather.
This is bad.This is rad.This is great.This we hate.
It's easy to do.Put something in view.That is the only step needed.Then greatness will be seeded.
No practice or building.It will glitter so gilding.You'll shine like a star.One post will go far.
One tweet and you're made.Your star will never fade.It is all just that easy.I have no reason to be cheesy.
You can make money while you sleep.Your pockets will soon run deep.It's as easy as just saying yes.Those fees....pfffft...we'll never confess.
Just listen and learn.Wait. That last word burn.Write it out and burn the word.Spellcheck will help if your spelling is blurred.
Don't learn or work.That isn't a perk.Put things up and that is that.You'll be a star and never flat.
It is all just that easy to do.No work needed by you.Everyone gets a medal after all.So squawk like the rest and have a ball.

Have you ever thought things would just magically happen because the keyboard you started a tappin'?  The cat hopes not or he may make fun a lot. Ever fall for the get rich overnight crap? They have pretty good talking points with their trap. What about the learn? Would you rather hit return? Seems all want it now now now. If they don't get it then they have a cow. On them I take a pass as they can't even have their eyes opened by my little rhyming ass.

Enjoy life forget the strife.

Time For 10 Reasons to go to The Birds!

 

What is that I see? Another one just flew over me. The tabbies are going to hate this post today, but I had to help Jax out as she is so whiny at her bay. I'd never hear the end of it if I didn't give her a go. So here we go with a bird show.
10 Reasons To Go To The Birds!

You could buy spray to keep the ticks away, but why do that? These guys can eat them and get fat.(But they may miss a few, so check everywhere. Yes. ticks even crawl up your butt crack. Check EVERYWHERE!!)

You could buy an alarm system or a mean mutt, but these guys are all you need to protect your hut.(And they may even protect it from you. Score!)

You could buy gates so no one can go down your driveway, but why do that when these guys stay in the way?(And if you accidentally run over them, no damage. Did I say that? Whoops. Guess I better duck and cover.)

You could order food from the store, or you could just eat what comes out their bum at your shore.(Now these do taste like chicken. If only they came in nuggets ready to go. What?)

You could buy lawn ornaments or the like, or just let this dude show off and let them take a hike.(Plus, it doesn't fade like lawn ornaments. Double Win!)

You could put flamingos or other lawn ornaments on your lawn, or you could let this guy stand there from dusk to dawn.(And they stay far far away. Just for those who don't like things up close and personal.)

You could watch that reality tv stuff, or you could buy a bird feeder and get this little thing.(I mean how many teenage moms, hillbillies, and plastic people can you humans watch? Oh, wait. You elected one president. Maybe you need a bunch to pick the next one so you have better odds of getting one with even half a brain.)

And then you could have this guy cleanup the mess that the top guy eats. They all like the treats. (Or they'll fight it out for the top. Entertainment!)

And when the day is through these guys can come fertilize the lawn for you. After they fertilize the playground and such. Don't worry, when it comes to crap they have much.(And if you're really nice, any tiny humans around may water the garden for free.)

And if they come defective or the like, you can always make a meal and then relax after a long day's hike.(They don't all taste like chicken.)
Now don't I have some great birding tips? Hmm are you saying I was licking my lips? Would I do that? Should I stick to being a rhyming cat? But I want to go birding too. They fill me up after a few. I'll keep the population down for her. That ought to make her purr. No? Only if she see's the birds by the ton? Damn. She's a lost cause. Oops I ate another one.

Time For A Photo Stroll

Pat was napping at our sea.Same couldn't be said for little old me.So I stole his phone and took a walk.First let's get to the why with our talk.

These things were outside the window yapping.They just screwed up my napping.So away I went for a stroll.Taking pictures was my goal.

Ninja turtle he is not.His story would have a very slow plot.

A slithering and a hiss.And he thought I'd miss.

4 gals out for a stroll.I wonder if going to the bathroom together is their goal.

This guy is a real stickler about getting near.I steered clear with my rhyming rear.

These things all stood very still.Their yapping never gave me a thrill.

Oops. She had to pee.That is something you can't un-see.

These make for a good snack.I got my protein before I headed back.

And these two stopped and licked.They said I went the wrong way and was tricked.

But then I just went duck duck goose.At least I didn't run into a moose.

And look at these ugly suckers.Have a look and your butt puckers.

And so on I went to forgive the mutts and nap.It's all water under the bridge or some crap.

BUT!!!!!!!!!! Then I returned to Pat awake with these.I just can't catch a break. Geez.

But then Pat quickly took them away.In the giant litterbox they went to play.So after my stroll across the map,I got to take my nice long nap.
Ever go for a wilderness stroll? Was getting away or taking pictures your goal? Plenty of wildlife near the cat. They sure leave a lot of scat. Those at the end do too. Pat wipes the butt of those two. I just laugh and then nap. He can stay a sap. Now it is nap time. So ends this little rhyme.
Go for a walk and take stock.

Time To Go To Work!

 

Sadly, the title is true. By the time this runs off to the grind I will be going. Isn't work fun? I guess that means that I easily fit the question this time. Or maybe not. Should I try the question on before answering? Am I able to send it back without penalty? Do you offer free shipping? Hmmm...I went a little off the rails with that, even though I'm not on rails to begin with, but whatever. I'm at work. What do I care? I may go over some rails. Or just take a leak down some old ones. What? Don't judge. That's too much work. Then you'd be a working one too. Working what? On with it before you get confused. Too late? Oh well. I'm at work.

When you think of the term working writer, what does that look like to you? What do you think it is supposed to look like? Do you see yourself as a working writer or aspiring or hobbyist, and if latter two, what does that look like?

It looks like ummm nothing at all. I see nothing as I'm at work. No computer. No writing. So it is work and it is writing. They don't go together. How rude is that? Working writer and food stamps could go together rather easily though. I think I'll stick with the 9-5 and avoid the food stamps for now. At least until I'm soon forced back into "retirement" by technology. Then maybe the two can go together for a while I suppose.

I know a few who do make a go of it, but they are really working just like any other job. There is no magic bullet or anything. You work and work some more. Some even admitted they lost the fun of it. So I think I'll skip the working writer unless I'm guaranteed a million bucks. I can be bought. Fun or not.

Are you a working writer? What does the term mean to you? What pops into your head first when you read working writer? Are you at work too? Do you have a computer at work?

Enjoy life, forget the strife.

Time For Top Ways To Make Money Online

#1 Fiverr
This is one of the best ways for anyone to make money online. We all have a skill or something of use and you can provide a service of pretty much anything on there. If you can sing or draw, you really have it made. And don't let the Five in Fiverr fool you. At first, you are going to be working for pennies, but once you up your client base and start to get traction, you can really pull in the money. 
Now, it won't happen overnight, you will have to work for peanuts at the start, you have to deal with many types of people, and some skills are more sought after than others, but you can make some serious money over time. They also have an affiliate program should you want to try to make some extra money.
#2 Influencer
Well you may end up only getting a lot of free stuff to review and the like, there are some that make millions off of it. If you have a following, reach out to people in your niche and/or area and see if they would want you to review their product or service. Again, it will take time, but once you build things up, it is possible to make a living just showing off other people's products and services.
But don't fool yourself, this isn't going to magically happen. It may take years before you have such a following that anyone will pay you to show off anything. The ease of it is why I ranked it #2, but for making money online, it can be a rather long road and you won't get rich quick or at all.
#3 Courses
This costs money upfront, unless you have everything needed to do it already, but if you can create a professional course on something that people want to learn, you can make $1000s. You don't even need to make your own website or try to get followers these days. With platforms like udemy, you can load it on there and then, with a little push, really see it take off.
The good thing about this one is that once it is up, it is up. With Fiverr gigs or Influencing, you are constantly doing new content or work. With a course, you are done once you get it loaded on the platform. Of course you have to do some marketing and you'll have to answer questions from students, but that is a lot less time consuming than what you'd have to do for the previous two.
#4 Affiliate Marketing
This is one that you can make some good money off of, but I really am not a fan. Why? Because you could sell $100 worth of product for someone and make a whopping $1. If that! If you can sell a million bucks of product in a year or find an affiliate program that pays you a decent cut, then you really can make a living online being an affiliate marketer. Otherwise, you may want to invest your time shaking a can outside Walmart or something. You'd probably make more money that way for far less effort.
But if you have a following and if you are willingly to put some serious time into it, affiliate marketing can be a gold mine. Although you may have better luck snapping a picture of Sasquatch and getting rich that way, it is still something to consider. BUT it will not happen fast. It may takes years, if ever, before you make a living online with affiliate marketing. And you really really have to keep working at it.
#5 Sell Your Stuff Online
This one is the quickest way to get some money. It may be a duh moment, but there are things that you may not have considered. Take a look around. If you haven't used something in a year, you probably never will. So have a look at ebay or the like and see what it is going for. 5 bucks is 5 bucks. Or you may find that hideous mask you have goes for 100 bucks. Never underestimate what someone will pay for something. And on the flip side, don't overestimate. Things are only worth what someone will pay for them.
Another neat little trick is if we go back to the influencer. After you show off the free stuff, sell it! You could have a steady income stream that way while building up your influencer status. Another way is to review on Amazon. If you get a high reviewer status, you'll get many offers to review free things. Just remember to provide honest reviews. Then when done, sell it! This is the one way where you can see a fast return. The only thing is, unless you go the influencer or Amazon route, once you run out of stuff to sell, your well runs dry.
#6 YouTube Channel
Here is another that you have to take the time to build up. Unless you do something that goes viral and appeals to the masses right away. It could happen, but you probably have a better chance of getting a picture of Sasquatch. 
The only thing required here is constant content that people will hopefully want to watch. Once you up your following, you can then add ads to your videos and rake in the money. It may only be pennies, if that, in the beginning, but millions of views do add up over time. And the good thing is that your videos can keep getting hits years and years down the road.
#7 Create Your Own Shop
If you have a product to sell, have an idea for a product, or maybe have a 3D printer at home, then you can possibly turn that into an online money maker. You could use Fiverr to sell them, but more people tend to steer toward Etsy stores. Heck, if you want to up your potential sales then you can use both. Get creative with a Fiverr gig and then put some fun addons there while also using your Etsy shop. 
You could build two at once if you used both of the above, and it wouldn't really be splitting your focus too much. That isn't something you want to do. Pick one and go to it unless it makes sense to double dip. If you are using the same way to make money online on two different places while then you can. But if you are trying to do 50 things at 50 places, stop it. You will never get anywhere.
#8 Stock Trading
Now this is one I've only vaguely looked into, but I do know a few who have made money at it. I also know a few who have lost money at it. I'm talking house down payment money. And you have to research and research to get up on everything if you really want to be able to make any significant money online with stock trading. 
Of course, you don't "have to" research as you could treat it like playing roulette or buying a lottery ticket. If you pick the right one of the right day, you could have a big windfall. But with the odds of that happening, you may as well go play a slot machine or buy a lottery ticket. 
#9 Blogging
There is still money to be made online from blogging, but it isn't as easy as it once was. You can still use ads or affiliate links or have sponsored posts or even build up a site that people will pay you to let them post on. It is all still a possibility, but it won't happen overnight. No one is ever going to come to your blog if all you do is post. You need to be interactive. You need to create backlinks. You need to do a whole lot of work before you even get your first real comment. Something that doesn't say "Great Post!"
People want quick and easy these days. That is why Instagram has taken off and will continue to do so. Blogging takes time and effort. Blogging takes up ten minutes or more in some cases for people to read. People tend to be lazy unless they are really interested. So blogging can make you money online, but it is also a tough go at it.
#10 Pictures
You don't need to be a professional photographer to sell pictures. There are sites out there where you can upload your pictures or videos and from there anyone who wants to use your picture or videos has to pay you a fee for the rights. It isn't a lot of money, but it can turn out to be a lot if you have many quality pictures and videos that you can upload.
Other ways are to use your pictures for t-shirts, mugs, calendars, or something similar. All are ideas to make money off your pictures, and you can use an Etsy store to do so, but once again all will take time and work to build any real online income for yourself.
Go Make That Online Money
There sure are many other ways, but some of them defy the point of making money online. Most want a secondary income or a full income without having to leave the house. You can post services like babysitting online, but for that you still have to leave the house. Or the kids are brought to you. Still defies the point. And there are many too good to be true things out there. If it is one of those, AVOID IT. Unless you are on the top of the pyramid scheme, in which case you may get arrested, you will only lose and lose and lose money. If you are iffy on something, research it. Because if you are iffy on it, chances are someone else will be asking questions too. Don't ever buy into these cult like groups claiming to get you rich. Most of them have few followers on any of their social media, that isn't bought, and have pictures that are doctored and they are told the right things to say to sucker you into their scheme. Don't get suckered. Unless you get lucky with the lottery, going viral, or something of the like, there is no get rich quick way out there. If you want to make money online then you have to put in the work. It is as simple as that.
Enjoy the online money making journey. It all starts with a single step.

Time For A Scare?

So Jax wanted to get with the cat and give scary movies a go. After she said that, Pat and I both gave an eye roll though. How are humans scared of fake stuff? I can see jump scares or scaring the tiny humans, but aren't the big ugly humans supposed to have a brain? Is a script scary?

I don't know about you humans, but we'll still play with Raviolis and Waterworks today.

So you have a guy that has a knife and you have big guns but you can't stop him because....because...he has a face mask? Is the face mask magic? Is that why he has so many different timelines now? That is just scary to think about as it hurts the head. See? A scary movie.

Here we have one that spawned 50 sequels. No one better than the other. Worse maybe. What is scary is how easily this could have been over. Gun. Check! Lock. Check! Gun to lock to try and get it off...anyone? Anyone? Nope. Let's saw our limb off instead. Scary!!!

Time to cheat. The ultimate cheat. Then create 50 more sequels where you cheat some more. But you know the world doesn't like cheaters, so you have to pay for that. You cheat. You die. That ought to put a stop to a lot of crime. I guess that would make it scary.

Let's play dress up and be a cat. What could go wrong? Let's lick ourselves and huff catnip. What could go wrong? Maybe it is more scary to ask what is right about this one.

Nature wants to eat humans. Or get rid of them. Or...I don't know. Make humans stare for two hours. Staring. Staring. Staring. Staring. Silence. More Staring. Oh so scary.

What timeline is this? What sequel is this? Is it a prequel? Is it a redo? Is it the same Sarah Conner? Did she shrink? Is he human or robot? Is this a reboot? What timeline are we in now? I know I asked that but I feel like Skynet shifted it. Oh. Skynet didn't die yet. That other thingy is later. Or is it before? F-ing time travel. Scary!

I'm on vacation. I'm on vacation. I'm on vacation. No you are not, you idiot. You went there with a purpose that wasn't to relax. You aren't on vacation so shut the hell up. Better yet, just shoot this franchise and throw what remains in the incinerator. At this point it is scary just seeing how low it has sunk. 

Thank you for being a friend...except to this guy. Go back to the Golden Girls. Leave the scary criminals to Rambo so he can rip off Home Alone after getting beat up. Hmmm maybe you should have been there. Could be scary either way.

Doesn't this just scream scary? No? Yes? Need I say more? Probably not, but that never stopped me before. Kindergarten Cop he's not. But it is probably ahead of the recent sequel to that, so that is scary. 

Oh. We are back to really scary. I mean look at his face. It is so scary. Those trolls aren't to be messed with. You could call this Troll 6. Or would that be 4? Maybe Critters 6? Don't remind me of the 5th one of that. Hell, forget 3 and 4. Maybe Ernest needs to take the trolls to school or Africa to play with the Critters. That would be a slamdunk. The kiddos will go to camp with this one.
Is it scary that I've watched all of these? Probably. Hey, the first wasn't bad when you forget the whole timeline thing and he killed her how many times now? Final Destination was interesting the first time, after the 5th sequel with the exact same thing, it gets old though. And Ernest beats the rest. Oh how the mighty have fallen and just don't know it.

Any movies that actually scare you? Any scare you when you were a tiny human at your zoo? Like how I switch to rhyme and then not? Hey, it can be a part of the plot. Or at least make you think. May bring you to the brink. See any truly time wasters lately? Not sure how some of such crap gets made, but it does. And then all it gets is crappy buzz. See any of the above? Now I am done. Wasn't that great? Were you expecting me to say fun? I enjoy screwing with all a t...bunch. And now this oh so scary movie post has come to pass from my off and on little rhyming ass.

Enjoy life, forget the strife.

Time For Some Zero Usage

Click Here for a Peer!
So Pat has still been a going with the novel showing, even if he is a blog slacker these days. Want to know why he is going through that phase? This book may have something to do with it. As in he has to deal with plenty of umm spit. Hopefully from 6 feet away though. Don't want any germs to show.


Wait? What is he saying? Is he talking about getting me a friend again? Nope. Thankfully. 
He just said that this one probably has the biggest twist that he has ever put into a book. Can you figure it out before it happens? I'm sure it isn't that hard. As it is just Pat. Not like it was written by this cat.
It even has some weird Robocop rip off, some alien looking things, hippies, and stalkers. Yet it is all grounded in reality. How can that be? Not science fiction? Hmmm Pat may be lying about his depiction. Nope? Geez. The cat doesn't believe him. What? That friend threat again? Go away and write about your grounded stalkers and continuing to whine about nature. I'll pounce on your head if you bring it up again.
So another novel has come from Pat. What do you think it is about? Could be something to the twist and it being grounded. Let's just say it isn't what you would expect from the whole alien reference. 
Enjoy life. Forget the strife.