Pat Hatt's Blog, page 11

A Place For You!

The cat was out and about. I may or may not have employed Pat to seek them out. Does it count as employee when you don't pay? Bah, he makes enough anyway. So we tried to show you water and send you for a direction trip, but now we are going to give you a house to buy and maybe flip.


Look at me.Time to buy by the sea.Buy buy buy from the best.All credit approved at 99.99% interest.

Here we have a tiny home.Won't have far to roam.And if the water rises up,You can row away without a hiccup.

Here we have a big rock..With it, you'll walk the walk.Hey, you could buy #1 and #2.That would be swell for you.

Here we have two.They aren't really in view.But they aren't the goal.You get to buy the pole.

Here we have one.Doesn't it look fun?But we can only finance the door.Sorry if you wanted more.

Look at the corner and turn.Some rubber may burn.We have that fence up for sale.It will keep no one out without fail.

And do you see far down?That tree is for sale in town.You could build a tree house.It would be fit for mighty mouse.

And look at this.Doesn't it bring bliss?Sorry, you only get the top.Good luck making that drop.

And see this one?My, it is well done.Those bushes sure look grand.They are for sale with no land.

And a quaint little retreat.A very quiet street.All nice and green.Sorry, you are only allowed to paint the scene. 
Should the cat give real estate a go? What was that? No? You mean you don't want a tiny home or a tree house? Damn, maybe you should ask your spouse. They may want to buy from the cat. You already did that? Hmm maybe I should just stick to taking pictures at my sea. And fyi, for the nuts, none of this is for sale by me, or maybe for sale at all. Hey, you could buy them come fall. Any scene stick out? Pat sure goes to many when out and about. On some though we'd take a pass. I want to avoid any bears eating my little rhyming ass.

Be careful what you buy, it could be a lie.

It's Not On Me!

I hear what you say.I hear what you ask.I hear it another way,Because it wasn't my task.
It could be the vendor.It could be the driver.It could be the blender,Or some shark diver.
But it's not on me.No, it's not on me.It's on you or a tree.Either way, it's not on me.
It could be the zoo.It could be the city.It could be super glue,Or some nasty old bitty.
It could be the house.It could be the car.It could be a mouse,Or some person from afar.
But it's not on me.No, it's not on me.It's on you or a tree.Either way, it's not on me.
It could be the air.It could be the ocean.It could be your hair,Or some nun in constant motion.
It could be a squirrel.It could be a nut.It could be a screechy little girl,Or some dude on their butt.
I still hear what you say.I still hear what you ask.I still hear it another way.Because it wasn't my task.
Nope, it's not on me.No, it's not on me.It's on you or a tree.Either way, it's not on me.
This popped on out as the cat has heard people shift the blame a ton. So it came out and we gave it a run. Do you take the blame when it is you or do you shift it to some other in view? Hmm maybe it really was a squirrel or a scary nun. They might ruin fun. You could even blame the sun. Okay, I'm done. This post was all my sass as it was written by me and my little rhyming ass.

Comments aren't on me as they are on thee!

Fixed Is Nixed!

The cat hears things from way up here. Or maybe Pat does, but I'm still near. We'll just go with the cat. I do hear things from poop machines where we are at. Pat let's them in. That has to be a sin. Right! Back to it. We don't want to go on about their umm spit. Are you looking? Think it's a wrong booking? Think it broke? Nope. Not that kind of fixed poke. Or maybe it is. Never fear, there won't be a quiz.

The idea of fixed.It sure can be nixed.Not even broken or busted.Can't even go with rusted.
No need be had,Which is kinda sad.But a had be need.It always takes seed.
It tries to play dumb.That old fixed income.Yet it leaves you broke and stuck.Can I get a what the fluck?
It robs you of supper.That great fixer upper.Yet it's more of a fixer downer.Tell it to an out of towner.
Shouldn't that be fixed?Out of towner may get nixed.They could dwell in a city.Out of citier some sort of pity?
Bah, that takes two.Plural towners, or citiers, for you.So that means a couple or pair.Both are the same? Don't go there.
Why is that the case?You'll get in another head space.Then we'll have to fix you up right.Even if you are sitting down on site.
But back to the pair.Or couple if you care.They were made and put together.Any storm they can weather.
They were fixed up by a friend.That has to be grand to no end.But they still look tired and worn.They look like they did on the day they were born.
All wrinkly and such.Fixed is out of touch.I guess I better fix its little red wagon.Let's end this before it starts laggin'.
Did you know fixed was such a liar? Someone should set fixed on fire. Steals your money, leaves you wrinkly, and lets your roof leak. You'd be better off up broken creek. At least the water may flow. Damned if I know. Did the cat think about this too much? That can't be fixed even a touch. And there was no mention of snip snip. I guess we didn't fixate on that trip. This is just how things come to pass with my not so fixable little rhyming ass.

Fixate on this and don't miss.

A Little Self...Nope!

Pat does steal my blog every now and then, but today he isn't going to get my den. Why is that? Because he said no to the cat. Can you believe that? No to Cassie and the cat. Pffffffffft!

Here we were sharing.The cat can be caring.Two for a chew.Then no came due.

"Did you want to die?"
Quiet. You gave it a try.
"At least I didn't throw a fit."
Stop interrupting my bit.

I can say no too.No ass pillow for you.Go sit on the floor.Or take it to another shore.

No Christmas decorations to be had.You'll have a bare pad.Not a thing to be seenSanta will think you're mean.

No laundry folded.To me it is molded.Hmmm that may be bad.Bah, already seen you naked at our pad.(And not much to see. Hee Hee Hee.)

And no balls for any.I don't care if there are many.No balls for you.And no ball tent too.

Bah. That got in.Books for a spin.Right. No sales for you.That works at our zoo.

Desperation at play.Two in one day.A 9 book series is had.Bah, still no sales for you at our pad.

Did you hear me?Nothing for thee.Return my string.Those fangs may sting.

Not talking to you.Nope, not giving a view.I want that string back.Bah, it won't give me a heart attack.
Pat got shameless self promotion and he still wouldn't give the string some motion. He hid it from me. Cassie let it be. Not me though. Have you had anything stolen from you that you won't let go? It will kill me? Bah, are you a vet at your sea? I'll poop it out just fine. I'm a rhyming feline. No? Bah, listen to my flow. I'm fine at eating string in mass. Pat only thinks he is protecting my little rhyming ass.
Tie a string and have a fling.

Questioning You And You And You And....Still You!

Today is the day.The day in May.Or the day in July.Either or shall actually fly.
Or maybe crash.Sticks like a bad rash.No cream to be had.Itchy and driving you mad.
Mad as a hen.Or a goose in a pen.They are nasty buggers.But still beat muggers.
What is the question?I made that suggestion.Oops. I didn't make it?Ain't that some shit.
How many purple bushes?None have tushes.Any remember that?Been a while for the cat.
Time ticked by.A few seconds, oh my.How many purple bushes?Do any need pushes?
It's now next week.An answer I seek.A question I must say.How many purple bushes today?
A month goes by.Let's give it a try.This you must know.How many purple bushes in tow?
You said three?You said it to me?When did you say that?Bah, that falls flat.
It was never said.You must have dreamed it in bed.But I do have a question for you.How many purple bushes are in view?
Did you answer yet? Come on, it's a safe bet. Did you answer yet? Come on, it's safe bet. Yeah, the cat just threw up a hairball with that. Brings to the forefront many a dingbat. Do you know anyone who asks you the same damn thing week after week? Do you know the answer they seek? Really they are just after what they want to hear as they ask the same crap in your ear. Oh, but they have so much to do. They have a bad memory too. They have so much to do. They have a bad memory too. Repeat the question and repeat the response. Maybe they got hit with a sconce? Or maybe they just like to try to annoy and it gives them joy. Either way they can go question the singing bass. They can then all go on repeat and stay far away from my little rhyming ass.
How many purple bushes? How many purple bushes?

The New Of New

A post that's new.A post that's blue.New kind of view.Could be for a few.
Or maybe just you.Hey, that's new.Or new to few.Whoops, did that view.
Repeat the new.Old in view.Old the view.View to new.
Maybe some stew.Tastes brand new.New and the loo.Meet and greet comes due.
Still need a clue?Butt meets view.Then paper shines through.That's nothing new.
Unless leaves are due.That is old too.My, where is new?Lost ever so true?
Maybe it got a clue.Left improved for the stew.Flushed it for a few.Stood alone without goo.
Goo for the new.Stuck ever so true.False for the glue.Super between me and you.
Nope, not true.No between glue.I'm not stuck on you.Is that back to new?
Confused at our zoo?That's nothing new.I do that to you.But what's with the new?

A second new post just for you, so click on through to Pat at the WEP's zoo.
Did you catch on to the cat? Probably not where you are at. But the cat is over there. Or rather Pat may be at the WEP lair. Two posts to see. All new for thee. Or maybe not new. Just new to your view. Or new to the cat. Or new to just Pat. Or maybe all is just old. Hey, chuck time travel into the fold. Now new is old and forever told. Still stuck on new? Believe new through and through? Have I confused in mass? Works for my little rhyming ass.

Nothing much true about the brand spankin' new.

Many About Or Not Out!

The cat smelled some funky things on Pat. We asked him and he said nothing about that. He just ignored it. Well now we know he was slumming it when out. Even doing it when about.


Do you see?A mutt and a cat not me.An overly dramatic mutt.Don't believe me at our hut?

See? Wants to go out the window.We wouldn't mind her giving it a go.But she is kinda low.Dramatic mutt, we know.

Then there was roadkill.Thought running in front was a thrill.Then the thing started cluckingOr whatever it was when its feathers were bucking.

And one thought Pat a pest.He spotted its nest.It was not a happy bird.We're sure it said a swear word.

Out it comes.Not standing any bums.Not sure what it is.But it meant some mean biz.

Squawk and squawk.Didn't want Pat to gawk.Maybe it should have stayed quiet.But nope, it wanted to riot.

And tons more.All by the shore.Soooo much poop.Like they have their own coop.

And then a stubborn one.It didn't even run.Heck, didn't even waddle away.It just decided to stay.

And another bird.This one was absurd.It thought itself a mutt.Followed Pat from hut to hut.

See? Just kept going.Attention seeker it was showing.Even let Pat brush it.Can you believe that umm shit?
Geez, sure a lot of birds out there. The tabbies may not think it fair. Ever have a bird follow you and act like a dog? Maybe it was in a brain fog? Beats the heck out of me. Any strange smells on thee? The cat would figure out what they were. Those funky smells sure can stir. Stir up lots of stuff. All right, I've said enough. Now I'll go back to smelling Cass. At least there is no funky smells on her for the nose of my little rhyming ass.
If you smell crap this summer, call a plumber.

$500 For You May Come Due!

I used to do this a while ago, way way way years back, when I saw a good one at the Giveaway Queen's show. AKA Rosey with her 666 ring around the posy. What? That not how it goes? Bah, don't sink to new lows. For today you could get $500 at your sea. Who couldn't use that for a shopping spree? Welcome to the Less Monday More Summer $500 Cash Giveaway!

Who doesn't need some extra cash? Imagine winning $500 just in time for back to school or to celebrate whatever you want. The winner of this awesome giveaway will be able to do just that!

GIVEAWAY DETAILS1 WinnerMondays suck but that doesn't mean you shouldn't enjoy every bit of what summer has to offer. So kick back, relax, and enjoy something cold while entering this giveaway.Home Jobs By Mom is super excited to of teamed up with an amazing group of bloggers to bring to you this cash giveaway event worth $500 PayPal Cash! Take advantage of this wonderful giveaway and enter today!!Host is Home Jobs By MomCo-Hosts are JBH Media One, Deliciously Savvy, Java John Z's, Sweet Southern Savings, View from the Beach Chair, Michigan Saving and More, Eclectic Evelyn & ReaderopolisRules: Use the Giveaway Tools form to enter daily. Giveaway ends 08/15 and is open worldwide. Entrants must be 18 years old to enter. Winner will be notified via email.Good Luck! Enter BelowEntry-FormAlso we all “love it if you follow us” on Instagram so we can continue to bring you great giveaways!ONE entrant will be selected by the entry form to win $500 PayPal Cash. If for some reason the winner can't do PayPal they may select a $500 gift card to Amazon, Walmart, or Target instead. Open for entry worldwide, 18 years and older from 06/01/19 thru 08/15/19. No purchase necessary. Void where prohibited. This giveaway is in no way endorsed, affiliated or associated with Facebook, Twitter or any other social media networking site. The winner will have 48 hours to respond to the notification email to claim their prize or a new winner will be selected. Once a winner is drawn and confirmed, the name will be announced on the GiveawayTools form. Home Jobs By Mom will be responsible for sending the winner their prize.Are you a blogger? CLICK HERE to get a FREE link added to one of our giveaways. Just post and report!If you have any questions or are a brand/company and would like to work with Home Jobs By Mom please contact me. Also, to be informed of new giveaways and blogger opps CLICK HERE.Thank You So Much For Visiting Today!

So there you are. Are you going for it at your sand bar? Mary Kirkland would have a great freebie Friday that week, should she win at her creek. What does it hurt to try to win the $500 mass? Sure works for my little rhyming ass.

Go for the win and fill your money bin.

Ode To The Tick Tick Ick!

You crawl and you stick.You bloodsucking dick.You pick and you choose.You stay in the news.
You burrow and suck.You dirty, little fluck.You give and release.You being the centerpiece. 

You take crack and pit.You germ-ridden shit.You blend and you mold.You see a human and, sold!
You crawl and you itch.You son of a bitch.You stick from a pass.You even crawl up an ass.

You wiggle and sink.You nasty old dink.You murder and maim.You stay out of the frame.
You ruin and fuss.You wonder why I cuss.You germ and exposeYou hide in last night's clothes.

You climb and you stick.You bloodsucking dick.You linger and load.You ruin nerve to node.
You need to be wiped.You heard what I typed.You petri dish of crapYou germ-ridden chap. 
Can you tell I have no love for them at my sea? They are one species that can go extinct and leave us be. Germ-ridden nasty things. They can take down bums to kings. All from one tiny little bite. They can turn you from light to darkness of night. Left with only a shell. Their petri dish of disease can cause any hell. That blotch in the last photo is one that attached itself to the car window. The grass there was even low. 2019 has resulted in 62 on me so far. Yeah, I don't want to get out of the car. Any wood ticks where you are at? Do you hate them as much as Pat and cat? If there were no nasty diseases and such, we wouldn't care very much. But on those life-altering diseases we'll take a pass. And yes, one actually did crawl up my little rhyming ass.
Wood ticks are shit, so don't get bit.

And Here Is Nine As All Worlds Align!

After years of writing away, now all worlds collide in book 9 of my first written series. Nice to finally see all come together like I envisioned at the start too. So here it is to view.


Click Here For A Peer!
After facing time travel, time fractions, the time axis, the Time Junction, alternate realities, Olympus, the Freton, aging, and even being turned into cartoons, Jack, Jeremiah, Emily, Trudy, Orlin, and the rest of their family have finally made it safely home. But as a battle as old as time itself comes to a head, they soon find that home is the least safe place they have ever been.

The forces of Lucifer and Hera march on Zeus Mountain, secrets of the past are revealed, and an ancient entity out to fulfill his destiny leave the odds stacked against them. With no one to turn to but each other, they must find it within to win one more battle, no matter the cost.

They soon learn that the fight to get back to their time, to retrieve loved ones from time, and to save time itself had all been a precursor to the battle to come. Follow Jack, Emily, Jeremiah, Trudy, and the rest of their family as their worlds finally collide in book 9 and everything they have been fighting to achieve comes down to one final battle.

What? You don't believe me that there are 9? I'll help with that. Count them up. Even if you don't like math I think you can get to nine. At least I hope. If not the cat may make fun, just saying.


Other Books In The Series
     
     
Don't forget to take a peer at the many books around here!