Dave Barry's Blog, page 3964

IF ONLY THERE'D BEEN A TARANTULA...

Aloha man calls 9-1-1 over botched fast-food order (Thanks to Jeff Meyerson, Lorn Ray and Jonathan Carl)

UPDATE

Here we are with Clifford the Big Red Dog. God help us if he breaks wind.

STRUMPDATE

Blogging from me will be sporadic today: I'm with Ridley at the booksellers convention in New York, where we're strumpeting in Full Trollop Mode for our new book. So far I have nothing to report except that last night we...

ECONOMIC UPDATE

Now, on top of the sagging men's-underwear index, we get troubling signs from Latvian-hooker futures. (Thanks to CJrun)

WE ASSUME HE'S SINGLE

A former steel worker from East London has secured his place in the record books by moving 17kg of live maggots from one container to another - in his mouth. (Thanks to Ralph)

YET ANOTHER REASON WHY DOGS ARE BETTER THAN CATS

Dogs can fly. (Thanks to trustf8)

WE'RE GONNA NEED A BIGGER SHOE

Police Called To Kill Huge Tarantula In Calif. (Thanks to Ralph)

BECAUSE WE, AS A NATION, CANNOT GET ENOUGH STUPID

The Wearable Towel! (Thanks to Glen Page)

TULSA

Standing Tall (Thanks to Rich Klinzman)

APOCALYPSE UPDATE

Omigod. (Thanks to jon harris)