Dave Barry's Blog, page 3938
June 23, 2009
UPDATE ON THE GIRL WITH 56 STARS TATTOOED ON HER FACE
Turns out that she is a moron asked for them. (Thanks to Jeff Meyerson and Siouxie)
FINE WITH US, AS LONG AS THEY NAME IT BUDDY
William & Mary mascot ideas include an asparagus (Thanks to Cynthia)
ATTENTION ALL SWANTON UNITS
Proceed immediately to Route 78. And take pretzels. (Thanks to Horace LaBadie and Ralph)
June 22, 2009
SOMEONE TO LOOK UP TO
'Until now celebrities didn't expose their nipples so they were no "nipple role models",' explains Dr Riccardo Frati, a cosmetic surgeon for the Harley Medical Group. (Thanks to Siouxie and Bruce Webster)
LOOK FOR THE UNION PIGEON
Professional pigeon wrangler Bill Desmaris wants any pigeon appearing as an extra or in a featured role in a motion picture made in Massachusetts to be locally licensed and banded - no fly-by-night scabs stealing scenes. (Thanks to Guin)
THOSE TERRORIST BASTARDS
(Thanks to Siouxie)
CANADA
Fun Neighbor To The North Key Quotes: "We came out, we were in a robe because, you know, it's a swingers' club," ...firefighters were also able to rescue four lab rats the business keeps on hand to explain rodent behaviour....
BECAUSE WE DON'T HAVE ENOUGH PROBLEMS ALREADY
We're going to bomb the Moon. Key Name of Concerned Human: Alfred Lambremont Webre (Thanks to Ralph)
WHY WE NEED GUYS
Guys are good at home improvement. (Thanks ti Jeff Meyerson and catmanmax)
ALCOHOL MAY HAVE BEEN INVOLVED
'Agitated' man rescued from dryer (Thanks to Horace LaBadie) Update: Related item here. (Thanks to Jeff Meyerson)
