Chris Illuminati's Blog, page 27
June 23, 2015
Dad Rock
June 5, 2015
March 26, 2015
I Fell In Love With My Daughter ON TAX DAY!
One of the biggest perks of being a new dad happened the day I filed my taxes. I didn’t think I could love my daughter anymore than I already did, but I was so wrong. I had 13 other parents submit vids/pics and this is how we celebrated. Was I a little too excited? Yes. […]
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March 18, 2015
Calling All Tax Refund Parents!
I filed my taxes and fell in love with my daughter all over again! I was so happy when that direct deposit hit that I made a song about it and I want YOU to be apart of the video! If you claim children on your taxes, post or message me a thumbs up pic […]
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The Kid explained this the other night before bed. He’s e...
The Kid explained this the other night before bed. He’s either watched too much Lego Movie or is preparing for a life as a motivational speaker. In this case, he’s 100% correct though — today is an awesome day for him and for me. He’s turning five and my new book — THE NEW DAD […]
The post appeared first on Message With a Bottle.
March 13, 2015
Confessions of a New Father
My daughter just celebrated 4 months of life. New and experienced parents know what this means. ROUND 2 OF 4 BACK TO BACK SHOTS STRAIGHT INTO MY DAUGHTERS THIGHS! Yes, it’s as bad as it sounds. This is the brief story of what happened on this round and an embarrassing confession of something I did […]
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March 5, 2015
What to do when the Baby’s Sleeping
My condolences to the former sleep patterns of all new parents out there. You’ve created a mini human who requires every resource you have. Luckily, the universe have given you a secret new parent gift called “nap time”. What you do with this blessing will determine if you’ll ever see true happiness again. This video outlines […]
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February 23, 2015
Why Moving With a Special Needs Child Was My Worst Parenting Experience
Moving sucks in the best of situations. When my husband landed a fantastic new opportunity in the fall of 2012, we had four small children and were living in a three square mile NJ town. We’d been in the house for 6 years. I didn’t have much time to think- our house was listed with an […]
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February 22, 2015
7 Lessons I Learned By Marrying A Pirate
In 2006, I went to an advanced screening of Pirates of the Caribbean 2, Dead Man’s Chest. I was quite taken with Captain Jack and his antics, even more so than in Pirates 1. While exiting the theater, I turned to my friend and said, “I am going to marry Captain Jack Sparrow.” Fast forward […]
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How My Job As A Dog Walker Is Exactly Like Raising My Kids
Let’s talk about kids vs. dogs. I am a private pet sitter/dog walker and a stay-at-home-mom. I spend roughly 80% of each day with puppies and dogs and/or my three-year-old son. From experience I can tell you: they’re not much different. On any given day, I am pretty much guaranteed pee and poop clean up […]
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