Todd Perelmuter's Blog, page 49
December 12, 2022
Path to Peace Why Do I Get Hurt When People Say Mean Things to Me?
If you're living and breathing, someone at some point in life will inevitably say something mean. Every single one of us has been hurt in some way, AND every one of us has probably accidentally said a mean word or two as well. It's human nature. Unless we live in a completely toxic-free society, we're going to be hurt and we're going to subconsciously and unintentionally pass that hurt on to others.
So, how do we break that chain of hurt? How do we transform that cruelty in the world into something more positive? How does that hurt happen in the first place and how can we stay present and joyful in the face of cruelty? I answer these questions and more in today's podcast.
Please enjoy other episodes where Todd shares meditation techniques, tips and spiritual lessons from around the world for peaceful and stress-free living. Remember to subscribe to stay up-to-date.
If you have enjoyed listening to the podcast, please share a review. It will help many others find their Path to Peace as well.
One small positive message can uplift our day. Get your dose of positivity at https://www.youtube.com/toddperelmuter
Like what I’m doing? Support the show at https://www.buymeacoffee.com/toddperel.
I answer spiritual questions from people on my weekly Path to Peace newsletter. Join the community of like-minded beautiful souls right at https://www.eastwesticism.org
You can find my books on Amazon, Audible, BarnesandNoble.com, and anywhere else you get your books.
The post Path to Peace Why Do I Get Hurt When People Say Mean Things to Me? appeared first on EastWesticism.
December 2, 2022
Path to Peace How to Bring More Contentment into My Life
What is the secret to contentment? Why is it so elusive? We all seek it and yet very few of us have it. We are bombarded with “solutions” for discontent everywhere and all the time. This or that product will finally give you the feeling of wholeness. The next iPhone will be the last product you'll ever need… until the next model comes out. This car, that house, this job, that amount of money, this therapy, that new drug, etc… — these are the stories we tell ourselves when we can finally put aside the feeling of subtle misery we walk around with 24/7.
The problem is, no situation will ever be perfect because the source of our discontent doesn't lie in external circumstances. It lies in the mind. It is the mind which generates the stories of our lives. It is the mind that obsesses over problems or fixates on wants and desires — never being satisfied. And, it is the mind that will continue to find problems no matter how “perfect” our lives look on paper.
One of the greatest misconceptions about contentment is that we mistake pleasure for happiness. If a favorite food brought true happiness, then the more we ate the happier we would become. But the opposite is true — that first bite is the best and if we keep eating we eventually become sick and miserable. What brings us true lasting happiness will allow us to deepen our peace and joy the more we do it, not less.
Knowing that the pleasure-chasing mind creates all problems, we also know that the solution also lies within the mind. We can train our mind to become peaceful and joyful. We can practice finding the true source of peace and joy within. In this podcast episode, I share exactly how to find that free and infinite wellspring of contentment that no object, circumstance or amount of money will ever bring.
Please enjoy other episodes where Todd shares meditation techniques, tips and spiritual lessons from around the world for peaceful and stress-free living. Remember to subscribe to stay up-to-date.
If you have enjoyed listening to the podcast, please share a review. It will help many others find their Path to Peace as well.
One small positive message can uplift our day. Get your dose of positivity at https://www.youtube.com/toddperelmuter
Like what I’m doing? Support the show at https://www.buymeacoffee.com/toddperel.
I answer spiritual questions from people on my weekly Path to Peace newsletter. Join the community of like-minded beautiful souls right at https://www.eastwesticism.org
You can find my books on Amazon, Audible, BarnesandNoble.com, and anywhere else you get your books.
The post Path to Peace How to Bring More Contentment into My Life appeared first on EastWesticism.
December 1, 2022
How to Stop Overthinking? (The Most Effective Way)
Understanding Our MindsOur minds are thinking machines, constantly jumping from thought to thought, constantly looking for something to overthink and obsess about. That’s what they do, it’s their job. A hand will do hand stuff and the mind will do thinking stuff.
What is the Most Effective Way to Stop Our Minds From Overthinking?
But what happens when our minds get out of control? What happens when they no longer think the positive thoughts we wish they would? What happens when they only dwell on negative things, like what could go wrong in the future and what has gone wrong in the past?
When that happens, here is what you can do:
1) Start practicing mindfulness
2) Become conscious and aware of your thoughts
3) Learn to focus your mind on what you want to focus on
4) Change unconscious negative thoughts into positive ones.
Guided Meditation to Stop Overthinking and Start Living Get Peace & Calm Delivered
Receive the tools and insights for living a life free from fear, negativity and stress.
Other Useful Spiritual Resources:
How to Meditate for Overthinking
Do You Think You’re Too Anxious to Meditate?
How to Calm Yourself When Anger Takes Control of You
The post How to Stop Overthinking? (The Most Effective Way) appeared first on EastWesticism.
Why is it Important to Live in the Present Moment?
Present Moment AwarenessHave you ever noticed how after big moments in your life you have almost no memory of them? Like how you can give a big speech and it’s like you missed the whole thing. You gave the speech or you were at your wedding, but you forgot to be present for it.
This doesn’t just happen for big moments either. Most of our lives we spend lost in thought, thinking about some other place or some other time.
Why is the Present Moment so Important?
I had a good friend who whenever we would go for a walk through the park with nowhere in particular to go, would walk a million miles an hour. She would miss the flowers and the birds, trees and the streams. She was so used to getting to the end of a task that she was never present during the task.
If we live our lives this way, we’ll get to the end having realized we were present for so little of this precious life. This is why it’s so important to bring presence into our lives whenever we can.
Meditation to Enter the Present Moment Get Peace & Calm Delivered
Receive the tools and insights for living a life free from fear, negativity and stress.
Other Useful Spiritual Resources:
Finding Peace When Suffering is Happening in the Present Moment
Why Successful Leaders Start Their Day with Mindfulness
The post Why is it Important to Live in the Present Moment? appeared first on EastWesticism.
Why Does Meditation Bring up Pain & Negative Emotions in me?
Q: Sometimes I wish I never started meditation. It brings up tremendous pain. Any advice?
Why Does Meditation Make Some People Angry or Sad?Most of our lives are spent suppressing or repressing painful emotions. Nearly everything we do is a distraction or way to avoid what we’re feeling. When we start a spiritual practice, it can take a while for all those painful feelings to be sorted and processed.
How to Work with Negative Emotions in Meditation
But, if we don’t heal them, we pass our hidden pain onto our neighbors, coworkers, family, and children. And, it festers in our bodies, turning into disease and more pain. I hope you can find a safe and healthy way to allow these feelings to express themselves.
Usually, the answer when we see something we don’t like is to look deeper. It’s not easy, but this is the only way we can realize what we’re trying to run away from is not as scary as we thought.
How to Make Your Meditation Experience More Effective Get Peace & Calm Delivered
Receive the tools and insights for living a life free from fear, negativity and stress.
Other Useful Spiritual Resources:
Why is my Meditation Showing no Results?
Shall We Express Our Anger Instead of Suppressing it?
Why Do I Have Weird Sensations While Meditating?
The post Why Does Meditation Bring up Pain & Negative Emotions in me? appeared first on EastWesticism.
November 24, 2022
Path to Peace Tips for Not Getting Overwhelmed in Life this Holiday Season
Humans did not evolve to face rush hour traffic, 24/7 news alerts on our phones showing us the worst things that are happening in the world, or to live half our waking lives at work with bosses and difficult coworkers. It doesn't matter who you are or where you live, there are times in our lives where we feel overwhelmed, stressed out, and exhausted from the constant barrage of chaos.
Luckily, there are several things we can do to decompress, relax and recenter ourselves. We can train our mind and body to release the fight-or-flight stress response. And most importantly, we can retrain our mind to not take on new stress and to see overwhelming situations in a more peaceful way.
In today's episode, I share those secrets for letting our bodies heal from the damage of stress. I share tips for activating our body's healing mechanisms. And I share how we can nourish our mind, body and soul so that we don't let unprocessed emotions turn into mental anguish, physical chronic pain, cancer, heart disease, and so many other stress-related ailments.
Please enjoy other episodes where I share meditation techniques, tips and spiritual lessons from around the world for peaceful and stress-free living. Remember to subscribe to stay up-to-date.
One small positive message can uplift our day. Get your dose of positivity at https://www.youtube.com/toddperelmuter
Like what I’m doing? Support the show at https://www.buymeacoffee.com/toddperel.
I answer spiritual questions from people on my weekly Path to Peace newsletter. Join the community of like-minded beautiful souls right at https://www.eastwesticism.org
You can find my books on Amazon, Audible, BarnesandNoble.com, and anywhere else you get your books.
The post Path to Peace Tips for Not Getting Overwhelmed in Life this Holiday Season appeared first on EastWesticism.
November 17, 2022
Why is my Meditation Showing no Results?
Todd Answers: Most people can’t sit down and instantly clear their minds, they think they might be doing it wrong. Or worse, they think they just can’t meditate and that meditation is not for them. But if I were doing something my entire life – thinking – and suddenly tried to stop, it might not happen as fast as I’d like it to.
Luckily, meditation is not about clearing your mind of all thoughts. It’s about becoming conscious – or mindful – of your thoughts. The more aware we become of our thoughts and the more we sit still without distraction to simply observe our mind, the more our minds stop mindlessly creating suffering and the more we consciously choose for it to create joy and peace in our lives.
Get Peace & Calm DeliveredReceive the tools and insights for living a life free from fear, negativity and stress.
The post Why is my Meditation Showing no Results? appeared first on EastWesticism.
How Do I Stop Being So Sensitive About Everything? Path to Peace
This is one of the most important and common questions I receive. The more in touch we become with our inner peace, the more jarring the outside world can become. As we begin the journey inward, we can become even more sensitive than we already were.
So what can we do to not be so sensitive? How can we take control of our own mental state and not have it be reliant on external circumstances? How can we develop the unshakable peace and joy that we’re all searching for? I’ll answer these questions and more as I dive into this topic in today’s episode of Path to Peace with Todd Perelmuter.
Please enjoy other episodes where I share meditation techniques, tips and spiritual lessons from around the world for peaceful and stress-free living. Remember to subscribe to stay up-to-date.
If you have enjoyed listening to the podcast, please share a review. It will help many others find their Path to Peace as well.
One small positive message can uplift our day. Get your dose of positivity at https://www.youtube.com/toddperelmuter
Like what I’m doing? Support the show at https://www.buymeacoffee.com/toddperel.
I answer spiritual questions from people on my weekly Path to Peace newsletter. Join the community of like-minded beautiful souls right at https://www.eastwesticism.org
You can find my books on Amazon, Audible, BarnesandNoble.com, and anywhere else you get your books.
The post How Do I Stop Being So Sensitive About Everything? Path to Peace appeared first on EastWesticism.
November 16, 2022
The Don’ts Of Meditation: What Not to Do
Meditation is an antidote to modern life. More and more people are beginning to understand this. Most of the world is now either planning to shift or has already shifted to this divine and magical world of meditation. However, there are some donts of meditation or the rules of meditation that you should keep in mind before beginning.
So what are these? We will tell you all about it. We will answer all the questions from how, when, why, where, who, and more.
So are you ready? Let’s begin.
How Not to Meditate
Many people ask me if there’s a wrong way to meditate. I always have to laugh just a little bit, but then I always answer the same: meditating is like going to the gym. A little is better than none, some types are more beneficial than others, but as long as you don’t overexert yourself, you’re going to get some benefits.
That said, different kinds of meditation will generate different kinds of results. There are pros and cons to everything we do and meditation is no different. In this blog, I’ll share the pluses and minuses to the who, what, where, when, and why’s of meditation.
When Not to Meditate
Warning: Do not meditate while operating heavy machinery. But, do be very present, focused, and alert while operating machinery. Meditation can help with that.
A lot of people ask me when is the best time to meditate. The answer is whenever you can squeeze it into your life and make it a permanent habit. I prefer doing an hour first thing in the morning and an hour the last thing in the evening.
For me, that’s when I can squeeze it in without distractions. I find first thing in the morning sets me up for a great day and the last thing at night ensures a solid night’s sleep.
I know many people who like to do first thing in the morning for 20 minutes and right before dinner for 20 minutes. Having tried it myself, I find that schedule is really great at keeping a peaceful state of mind throughout the day and into the late evening.
Scientists who’ve studied neuroimaging and brain scans have found that doing at least 20 minutes a day is shown to have positive and lasting effects on our mental and physical health and well-being.
Moreover, Harvard researchers have found that mindfulness meditation has positive effects on depressed patients. It lowers our stress and makes us measurably happier too.
Is There a Best Time of the Day To Meditate?
As for the best time of day, many people in the far east say that there is a special energy in the atmosphere that makes 4 am the best time to meditate before the world has awoken and started stirring things up.
The important thing to remember is, meditation is all about how you feel throughout the rest of the day and in your life, not just about the experience you have while you’re sitting down meditating with your eyes closed.
So try different times and see what works best for you. Don’t push yourself too hard and don’t go too easy on yourself. Like the Buddha said, take the middle path.
Where Not to Meditate
Do not meditate on a tightrope above an alligator pit. However, everywhere else is pretty much fair game. It’s certainly easiest and most pleasant to meditate in a quiet, dimly lit room.
Sitting on a few pillows on the floor or with your head propped up in bed are very comfortable ways to do it. Some people prefer a chair or couch. Whatever is best for you is best for you.
Some meditation instructors will tell you that it’s best to sit cross-legged on the floor with a straight back, neck, and head, leaning slightly forward as if we’re giving our full attention and focus.
For some people, this will feel too arduous and be more distracting than it is useful. Your own personal physicality and ambitions will determine your seating arrangement. As long as you don’t fall asleep (unless you’re meditating in the evening with the intention of falling asleep), you’re good to go.
I know some people who are so busy that they can only meditate on the bus or subway to and from work. This is also totally fine (as long as you’re not driving!). For some of these people, they find tuning out the noises and distractions actually heightens their meditation practice.
For others, they like to hang a do not disturb sign on the door of their meditation room so their family knows not to come in or be too loud. In short, wherever you are able to meditate consistently is the best place for you.
Who Should Not Meditate
If you’re always happy, peaceful, blissful, fully alert and aware, one with everything, pure love, and gratitude, without stress or a care or fear in the world, congratulations. You may just be the Dalai Lama or the second coming of Jesus.
If you’re like the rest of us though, meditation is probably for you. I have never met anyone who couldn’t benefit from being happier, more patient, more relaxed, more present or more focused in their lives. These days, it seems everyone is addicted to something, whether it’s caffeine, food, alcohol, tobacco, work, TV, the news, smartphones or even social media.
Becoming more mindful through meditation helps us break the unconscious habitual thought patterns and helps us live more consciously and thoughtfully.
In case you do suffer from any kind of mental health issues, or if meditation brings up disturbing thoughts or emotions, it is best to talk with an experienced meditation teacher or healthcare professional.
However, for many people suffering from mental afflictions, meditation has been proven to be a safe and effective treatment. From OCD to ADD/ADHD and depression to anxiety, meditation addresses the root of the problem by heightening our awareness and improving our concentration.
The more we observe the nature of the mind, the more conscious we become. The more conscious we are of our own mind, the less we unconsciously create mental suffering.
Through meditation we can all become less stressed, more relaxed, more present, and more fulfilled in our daily lives.
What Kind of Meditation You Shouldn’t Do
Don’t meditate in a way that feels like such an enormous challenge that you give up on meditation after 2 minutes. Learn a few different types, try them out, and do the one that is best suited for you. An experienced meditation instructor can help you find the right type for you.
Some people like to listen to music or use meditation apps. Others like to be guided. Some people like to stare at a candle or a crystal. Some folks like to use a blindfold. While no type is bad, some are more beneficial than others.
These kinds of meditation that rely on some external factor such as sounds or objects can become a crutch that we become dependent on after a while.
How to Walk Your Meditation Path?
For some people when starting out, they need a guided meditation or music in order to relax at all. But the most beneficial types of meditation make you the guru of your own mind.
They allow you to do all the work so that you get all the benefits. This journey is all about you and only you can take yourself where you need to go.
You are your own guide. You don’t need to give your power over to anyone else. Not only this, You are whole and complete and your time for meditation is merely about you connecting with yourself.
It may be a little less entertaining than a guided meditation, but that is the point. In meditation, we want to remove all distractions and get rid of all material necessities so that you can do it anytime, anywhere.
For many beginners, and even experts occasionally, using sounds and objects can be very beneficial. But to get the most benefits, simply sitting with your eyes closed in silence is the best way to raise your level of awareness, concentration, and consciousness.
The more we simply observe our own thoughts and emotions, the more we understand the nature of our mind. The more we understand, the wiser we become, the more blissful we become, and the less we unconsciously create needless stress and suffering.
Why Not Meditate
Exactly, why not! Meditation makes us happier, healthier, and wiser. It gives us more energy, better focus and greater awareness. You don’t need to be suffering from a midlife crisis to start a meditation practice.
Meditation is the key to preventing a mental crisis in the first place. We all, kids and adults alike, need these spiritual tools in our spiritual toolbelt for whenever illness or loss does occur.
Meditation helps us process our thoughts and emotions in a positive way so that no matter what is going on in our lives, we feel a deep and abiding peace and joy that emanates from within regardless of whatever is happening in our personal lives.
Just like it’s important that we get our body checked out by a doctor, checking out your own mind is even more important and there is really only one person able to do it—you!
It’s absolutely essential that everyday we put aside all our gadgets and gizmos for just a few moments and check in with ourselves, center ourselves in the present moment, relax and slow down. It’s essential to let the body heal and repair.
How Not to Find the Right Type of Meditation for You
Do not join a cult! Do talk to an experienced meditation instructor. They can answer all of your questions and guide you in the right direction.
There are a lot of huge corporations out there right now that want to sell you a meditation experience, but they might have nothing to do with actual meditation.
Many companies have co-opted the word meditation and instead of giving people what they need, they give people what they want—a very pleasant experience but not a very beneficial one.
There’s no quick fix or easy pill to take for the benefits of meditation. Some types of meditation are easier than others, but you get out what you put in just like everything else.
Other Useful Resources:
Mantra Meditation vs Breath Meditation: Which One is Better?
Can Meditation Help with Organization & Decluttering?
Which Meditation Technique Todd Recommends
How Can I Cope with Grief and Loss Through Meditation?
Get Peace & Calm DeliveredReceive the tools and insights for living a life free from fear, negativity and stress.
The post The Don’ts Of Meditation: What Not to Do appeared first on EastWesticism.
How to Overcome the Curse of Perfectionism
Executives, creatives, and high achievers all frequently suffer from the self-imposed stress of perfectionism. Striving for perfection is one thing, but when not reaching the impossible ideal of perfection causes stress and anxiety, then it no longer serves our highest interest or our best work. Luckily, the curse of perfectionism in high performance individuals can be overcome.
What is the Curse of Perfectionism in High Performance Individuals?
Oftentimes, the people who are most successful are perfectionists. They demand perfection of themselves and expect it of others. Since perfection does not exist, or rather, everything already is perfect but the perfectionist thinks nothing is perfect.
Artists, executives, entrepreneurs and other highly successful people almost universally suffer from this self-imposed torment of perfectionism. When our passion is approached mindfully, we can use this drive to create better work. We can forgive ourselves and others for our limitations. Kindness can be extended to ourselves and others. We can create without fear of failure and so our work can become bolder and better.
When we are mindless perfectionists, we can become lost in our work. We can kill ourselves with drink or drugs as so many artists have done so in trying to cope with the stress. The self-imposed stress can find all sorts of unhealthy outlets that only succeed at burying the emotions until they explode in dis-ease or addiction.
The Cure for the Curse of Perfectionism in High Performance Individuals
This may be the single greatest mantra for all the people in the world who strive for greatness and to do good in this world. For the spiritual seekers who are trying to improve themselves, and for the CEOs and high-powered lawyers.
Many mantras are what we wish to happen. They are manifestations or they may be pieces of wisdom. They may be religious or they may be just meaningless sounds. Whatever they are though, they tend to be either wishful thinking, positive thinking, or praise to a deity.
Now to be clear, I am a big fan of every single kind of mantra. Each one has its place and each one is incredibly beautiful and profoundly beneficial. This mantra however is unlike all the others. This is something you already know is true, you just forget. And so, by making this your mantra, you will instantly reduce your stress. You will easily be able to take on any moment or challenge.
The Meditation for the Curse of Perfectionism in High Performance Individuals
The mantra is very simple and will help in so many ways to simply get into a meditation, to relax deep into your subconscious, and then repeat this silently to yourself for a few minutes a day, up to 20 minutes twice a day:
“I do not need to be perfect. I do not need a perfect life.”
Instantly, your self-imposed stress and pressure disappears. When you fully absorb this understanding within you, your worries about what may or may not happen disappear. Your ego dissolves and it no longer matters what critics or enemies say. Nothing is taken personally and there is never cause for panic.
Our need for controlling every little detail of our life goes away when we meditate on this mantra. Our subconscious fear of losing what we have also goes away when we meditate on the second part of this mantra.
Why We Must Overcome the Curse of Perfectionism in High Performance Individuals
When we can strive without stress, we can work harder and longer because we are not taking on new stress. It is no longer working when the stress goes away. Work becomes just another exciting change of experience upon our conscious awareness. It becomes effortless and our inner resistance fades away.
This mantra prevents burnout, which stems from the chronic stress and pressure of perfectionism. We can dive into stressful situations without taking on the stress in our body or mind. We can thrive in chaos, we can love the unknown, and we can have greater confidence knowing that we can make mistakes but we will also be present and wise enough to know how to handle them with mindfulness when they occur.
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Other Useful Resources:
Mantra Meditation vs Breath Meditation: Which One is Better?
How Can Mindfulness Help in Saving Money?
How Not to Let Mean People Ruin Your Day
Why Meditation for Executives? De-stress for Success
The post How to Overcome the Curse of Perfectionism appeared first on EastWesticism.
