Todd Perelmuter's Blog, page 53
July 5, 2022
Can Love, Compassion, and Forgiveness Always be the Answer?
ToddAnswers: Sometimes setting healthy boundaries is the kindest thing we can do for ourselves and others. We can’t control everyone, we can only maintain our inner peace and sometimes that means from a safe distance.
Q: I feel like forgiving mentally is so easy, but emotionally, that’s where the real work is! What can we do to make it easier even in the other case?That is 100% true. But, forgiveness is like a muscle that we can strengthen and nurture. The more we practice it, the more we do loving-kindness meditation, and the easier it gets.
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How can we Eliminate Stress When it is too High of a Bar to Achieve?
Just like how our emotions can be dictated by chemicals in our brain, anxiety may also still arise. However, I think really the goal of mindfulness is to be aware of these changes in our body and moods, to be aware of our thoughts/worries/anxieties. Once we are aware of it, we won’t get caught up in it and it won’t overpower us. So it’s more about bringing mindfulness to whatever is going on inside us, and in doing so, we can observe it rather than be consumed by it.
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How to Manage Your Anxiety & Live a Peaceful Life
ToddAnswers: So often our anxiety gives us anxiety. The best thing we can do besides practicing meditation is to turn our anxiety into curiosity, really examining it when it starts to occur and instead of resisting it being curious about it. This way we don’t only turn our anxiety into curiosity, but we also develop a greater understanding of it and we can see it start to happen and we can respond by either meditating or doing something that relaxes us.
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How can I Step Back and See the Big Picture?
ToddAnswers: That is a great question. It can be done in every moment by simply being aware of the space between objects, the silence between words and thoughts, and in the stillness. We usually miss these moments, but they are always there and these spaces are from where all forms can arise. In some sense, space is more important than objects because, without space, there could be no existence.
The more we see the space, the more we see connections and how things exist in relation to one another. We move beyond the senses of form and move into expanded consciousness of energy and relationships.
The easiest way to see the spaciousness is to close our eyes, sit in quiet, and turn our attention inward beyond our five senses. Here is where we will discover our deepest senses of being and a perspective of the entire universe within us and of which we are a part.
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How do I Get to Achieve or Believe in This Oneness?
There is nothing to believe. Once you experience it, you will know. A deep knowing will arise when you begin to raise your consciousness to see the interconnectedness of all things.
As we focus more on the space between objects and the silence between thoughts and words. There is an energy field that connects the entire universe and that lies between all things. Science has proven it but we can experience it when we close our eyes and feel it within.
There is a very powerful meditative prayer gratitude you can do to discover this as well. It’s non-religious and purely scientific. The next time you have a meal, think of all the things and people and creatures and phenomena that made your meal possible. From the sun to the rain, the trees and the bees, the farmers and the truckers, the road pavers and truck manufacturers, the miners and their parents, and so on and so on.
There is no end to this exercise and eventually, you will realize we are all connected, we are all dependent on one another, and we are truly all one.
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How to Help Others Without Suffering for Their Sufferings
ToddAnswers: You are a warrior and a very kind-hearted empath. I know it can be so hard to be a warrior and defender of love and peace on this planet. While understanding on an intellectual level can help, it certainly is not enough. Like becoming a doctor or an expert in anything else, we need to understand the concepts, and we need the experience and practice too.
When working in stressful jobs like yours, such as people who work in corrections or social workers, it’s more important than ever to release stress so it doesn’t accumulate. We need to set aside time not just to recharge, but to help us reframe how we see the stressful situations in our lives so that they don’t cause excessive and unmanageable stress.
It really takes giving yourself the time each day to process these experiences in a healthy way by meditating on the present moment (either your breath or a mantra), and practicing letting go of the past so you can be at your best in the present moment. The weight of the world and the weight of time is too much to bear for anyone.
As stressful thoughts arise, simply notice the thoughts and the tension in the body. Don’t judge or resist it. Just notice it. And then, bring your attention back to this moment. Notice your tendency to hold on to it. Then let it go. This is the art of letting go of negative feelings so we can be present and more there for those who need us — even those fuzzy and furry little animal friends of ours. It just takes a few minutes a day, the more you can spare the better. This will put into practice the concepts and allow for real change to occur.
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Is Filling Every Gap in Mind With Mantra During Meditation Good?
A mantra is a great vehicle for arriving in the present moment. Especially when our minds are particularly chaotic. However, the constant mantra doesn’t allow for as much mindfulness and observation of our thoughts, mindset, and emotions.
Focusing on your breath or your body can offer a chance to observe those things, as well as give us moments of complete presence and absence of thoughts. We don’t have to just stick to one or the other. We can use each one when we feel we need it for its specific benefit, and we can listen to our heart, mind and body to let us know what we need in the moment.
The post Is Filling Every Gap in Mind With Mantra During Meditation Good? appeared first on EastWesticism.
How to Calm Yourself When Anger Takes Control of You
ToddAnswers: It takes time to develop any new habit, but every single time you can bring just a second of presence and awareness to that emotion, you are slowly developing that new habitual reaction of calm.
One thing you can try to do when you are sitting alone and have some time is to close your eyes and think of a situation in the past or a potential situation in the future that you know will trigger those heavy emotions and visualize how you wish to respond.
Really think about that trigger to the point where you can’t help but visualize yourself overreacting, and then sit with it until you find a way to react calmly. Think, “how can I react in the most effective and beneficial way possible?” Let me know how that works for you and go easy on yourself.
Q: What could we do when somebody makes us angry? And makes us wanna react the way they react?
ToddAnswers: When someone engages in hurtful behavior, we do our best to witness the painful emotions within us arising, witness our thoughts and not resist them or be angry with them. Just observe and accept them.
Then, as the present witness, we can remain calm and present, and through clarity rather than anger, we can see the best path forward. Hurtful situations don’t need to cause us hurt when we can see the big picture in these small moments. We can respond with strength and compassion. Over time, every act of kindness we take will help lead to a kinder world.
The post How to Calm Yourself When Anger Takes Control of You appeared first on EastWesticism.
July 4, 2022
What if Smoking & Vaping Habit of Others Disturb Your Inner Peace
Todd Answers: That is very understandable. It’s always difficult to see our loved ones or people we care about doing something harmful whether it’s vaping or doing even more harmful drugs, it’s all too easy to see them as failures or fools. But often, these are the people who need love and support more than ever.
Because people make one big mistake — trying some addictive substance activity once and then get hooked — doesn’t make them unworthy of love or failures we should immediately write off. Letting them know with love your concern and if they ever want to talk you’re there for them, can help them feel supported and less likely to continue destructive behavior. It’s small gentle nudges that have the greatest success.
Now, this doesn’t mean exposing yourself to any harmful chemicals or dangerous situations. We can only give the love we have to give. That means knowing your limits and listening to your heart.
The post What if Smoking & Vaping Habit of Others Disturb Your Inner Peace appeared first on EastWesticism.
June 23, 2022
What the Recent Harvard Study Says About Meditation
A new study on meditation was recently published by several Harvard Medical School professors. It has revealed startling results and implications for how corporations can incorporate meditation into their companies.
By following the same techniques that we teach at EastWesticism, these mindfulness exercises and practices for stress reduction were proven to have extraordinary impacts on the brain and on the lives of its practitioners.
What the Harvard Meditation Study Did
Over 8 weeks, participants spent an average of 27 minutes per day dedicated to the three mindfulness practices. Furthermore, these techniques are identical to the ones that EastWesticism teaches at all of their corporate meditation retreats. But to put it quite simply, the results were astonishing, and all the participants had no real prior experience with meditation or mindfulness
What the Harvard Meditation Study Found1. An Increase in Mindfulness
Compared to the control group, the mindfulness practitioners experienced significant increases in measurements of mindfulness (acting with awareness). Awareness of themselves and their surroundings, and furthermore, being nonjudgemental, both improved.
2. An Increase in Gray MatterIn just 8 weeks, the size of the brain grew in the mindfulness and meditation group. But most strikingly, the left hippocampus increased measurably in size as a direct result of the mindfulness training program. Notably, this part of the brain is responsible for regulating emotion and lowering stress.
Furthermore, numerous studies have shown this particular region of the brain to be larger-than-normal in experienced meditators.
Conversely, a small left hippocampus has been linked to major depression, PTSD, a reduction in the brain’s ability to create new cells, and other stress and emotion-related issues.
3. Affect on Work and HomelifeAnd finally, scientists observed enduring changes to the structure of the brain caused by this program. Just a little bit of meditation and mindfulness over a very short period of time suggested markedly improved mental functioning. Participants were more present and less robotic when doing activities, at both work and at home.
Learning, memory, and self-awareness were all improved, but so were stress and emotion-management.
What Mindfulness Program Did the Harvard Meditation Study Use?
The mindfulness program that this study used, as well as the program EastWesticism teaches, consist of 2 types of meditation along with some gentle mindful yoga stretching.
This specific 8-week study consisted of weekly meetings that lasted for 2.5 hours each, and a 1-day retreat on the sixth week of the program. However, companies can customize the schedule and timeframe for their mindfulness program based on their unique needs.
All in all, the benefits of meditation programs like this one include greater employee home and work satisfaction, fewer mistakes, greater focus, longer attention spans, less stress, and more energy.
To help your company lower turnover, reduce burnout, be more creative, be less stressed, and work better together, email Hello@EastWesticism.org to begin a corporate mindfulness and meditation program today.
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The post What the Recent Harvard Study Says About Meditation appeared first on EastWesticism.
