Todd Perelmuter's Blog, page 52
October 27, 2022
Path to Peace How to Resist the Urge to Argue with People
We live in a time of rage-filled news and algorithms that serve up content guaranteed to make your blood boil. And while we know on some level that there is no point in arguing with people who will surely disagree with us and never change, too often we fail to resist the urge and we end up spending way to much of our precious time and energy in the comments section on social media.
So, why do we argue? How do we stop? And what actually is the best way to influence others into actually being receptive to differing opinions? In this episode, I explore all these questions as I dive deep into how we can speak our truth while preserving our peace of mind.
Please enjoy other episodes where Todd shares meditation techniques, tips and spiritual lessons from around the world for peaceful and stress-free living. Remember to subscribe to stay up-to-date.
If you have enjoyed listening to the podcast, please share a review. It will help many others find their Path to Peace as well.
Support the show: https://www.patreon.com/ToddPerel
The post Path to Peace How to Resist the Urge to Argue with People appeared first on EastWesticism.
October 20, 2022
Path to Peace How to Get Rid of the Victim Complex
Maybe predators smell fear. Maybe it's sensed. Or maybe there is some quantum mechanics going on. But for whatever reason, when people see themselves as victims, they're more likely to become victimized. This has been demonstrated by people walking down the street. They are more likely to be attacked or robbed if they think they might be.
In contrast, people who exude a calm confidence don't get bothered as much. Whatever the reason for this phenomenon, getting rid of the victim complex is a good idea. How to do it is a bit trickier.
In this episode of the podcast, I share why we develop the victim complex, what we can do about it, and how we can go from victims of our lives to the conscious creators of our destiny.
Please enjoy other episodes where Todd shares meditation techniques, tips and spiritual lessons from around the world for peaceful and stress-free living. Remember to subscribe to stay up-to-date.
If you have enjoyed listening to the podcast, please share a review. It will help many others find their Path to Peace as well.
Support the show: https://www.patreon.com/ToddPerel
The post Path to Peace How to Get Rid of the Victim Complex appeared first on EastWesticism.
October 13, 2022
Path to Peace How Do You Accept What is When There is Real Danger and Evil in the World?
Someone recently asked me how I can suggest that even people in Ukraine respond with love when they're lives are in danger. The person went on to tell me that they struggle with spirituality because “we have fear for a reason and if a bear is charging at you, it doesn't care if you respond with love or not, it will still eat you. If you respond with fear, maybe you'll at least run away and get to safety.”
This is really a great question and something I know a lot of people wonder about. The good news is, mindfulness does not make us foolish, naive or deluded. Mindfulness is simply about being more aware — more aware of danger, more aware of potentially harmful situations, and most importantly, more aware of how best to respond.
Luckily, this even works for bears. Experts say don't panic and try to run away from a bear or it will surely eat you. Many animals can sense fear. Even humans can pick up on it. The agitation in you triggers agitation and fear in the animal and they are more likely to respond out of fear themselves and preemptively attack. However, if you stay calm, if you stand your ground, if you look strong and big and confident, the bear will back off. People are the same way. Studies show that when we feel fear, we are more likely to be victimized.
As for Ukrainians, responding with love isn't about giving something to their enemy. It's about giving themselves the inner strength to go on. Hate is draining and love is invigorating. The response on the outside may look the same, but on the inside, only love is sustainable. Love is about responding rationally, not in a reactionary manner. It's about not losing ourselves so we can know how to respond most wisely. It's about maintaining our faculties so we can best be of service to our cause. It is the complete opposite of rolling over and accepting brutality.
Please enjoy other episodes where Todd shares meditation techniques, tips and spiritual lessons from around the world for peaceful and stress-free living. Remember to subscribe to stay up-to-date.
If you have enjoyed listening to the podcast, please share a review. It will help many others find their Path to Peace as well.
Support the show: https://www.patreon.com/ToddPerel
The post Path to Peace How Do You Accept What is When There is Real Danger and Evil in the World? appeared first on EastWesticism.
September 18, 2022
Path to Peace How and Why Should I Respond with Love to People Who Hurt Me?
Someone recently asked me this question about how to respond to people who hurt us. I get it, believe me. Our first (unconscious) instinctual reaction is to respond with anger. But this would be a reaction that lacks wisdom, patience, perspective, and most importantly, efficacy. It is just not effective when communicating to respond with anger. People's walls go up and they dig even deeper into their positions.
So how can we see the error of that small thinking? How can we step back and see the bigger picture? How can we respond most effectively? To do this, we need to maintain our composure so we can see the situation as it truly is and how best to proceed. By not losing ourselves in rage, and through a little careful analysis, we can see there is never any need to be angry, there is no need to hate, and there is no benefit to conflict.
In this episode, I explain why love is the only answer, and how to love even our greatest enemies. We are all only here because of love. Someone nourished and nurtured us as babies because of love. Love can save lives, and the lack of love is what has caused all violence and cruelty in this world. Love isn't some fantasy or hippy thing. It literally can change the world.
Please enjoy other episodes where Todd shares meditation techniques, tips and spiritual lessons from around the world for peaceful and stress-free living. Remember to subscribe to stay up-to-date.
If you have enjoyed listening to the podcast, please share a review. It will help many others find their Path to Peace as well.
Support the show: https://www.patreon.com/ToddPerel
The post Path to Peace How and Why Should I Respond with Love to People Who Hurt Me? appeared first on EastWesticism.
July 23, 2022
Path to Peace Why Do I Have Weird Sensations While Meditating?
One person recently asked me, “Why do I get extreme tingling in my face and fingers when meditating?”
The fact is, it is not uncommon for a wide variety of sensations and reactions to occur when we meditate. It's not the meditation that caused it. It's the meditation that allowed this buried feeling/trauma/pain to come to the surface and start to heal.
No matter what comes up in meditation, allow it to be without any negative feelings about it. What happens when we do this is we train our mind to accept without negativity whatever is happening in the present moment. This is how the practice of meditation is the practice of life. Differing sensations will come and go. Simply watch them come and let them go. In this episode, Todd talks how to do just that.
Please enjoy other episodes where Todd shares meditation techniques, tips and spiritual lessons from around the world for peaceful and stress-free living. Remember to subscribe to stay up-to-date.
If you have enjoyed listening to the podcast, please share a review. It will help many others find their Path to Peace as well.
Support the show: https://www.patreon.com/ToddPerel
The post Path to Peace Why Do I Have Weird Sensations While Meditating? appeared first on EastWesticism.
July 15, 2022
What if There is Suffering Happening in the Present Moment?
There can be a pain in the present moment, but suffering can only happen in the mind as a response to a situation that happened in the past. Because there is always a moment between an experience and our mental response, all suffering stems from the past.
Yes, there may be undesirable circumstances, but we can either accept and even welcome them, or we can resist and create inner conflict with them. It really is our choice if we are conscious of these thought processes and intentional with our response. It’s really quite amazing you could put two people in the exact same situation and one will love it and welcome the challenge, and the other will hate it and fight it. This is what I mean by all suffering happens in the mind, not based on any external situation.
The post What if There is Suffering Happening in the Present Moment? appeared first on EastWesticism.
Do Bad Things Happen to Teach us a Lesson? Thus, Being a Good Thing in the End?
That is absolutely correct, things that happen are only good or bad depending on how each subject sees it. Things may be desirable or undesirable, but the action itself is neither good nor bad. There is no objective quality of “good” or “bad” to our experiences.
There is so much happening in each moment and we can choose what we focus on and how we see it. It may be harder or easier depending on the person and the situation, but we can always develop our focus, deepen our awareness, and nurture our ability to see the positive. We can choose to learn and accept, or resist and fight.
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Is it Bad to Avoid People who are Mean and Hurtful?
I think of it the way I think of art. I deeply love all art because it comes from a place of wishing to make the world a more beautiful place. However, I can’t hang every piece of art in my house, so I have to be a little choosier. We can love everyone, and forgive everyone, but we don’t have to give our precious time to every single person on earth
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July 5, 2022
How to Find Happiness & Peace?
ToddAnswers: Every action we take is done out of a search for happiness. And yet, all we find is momentary pleasure followed by more craving and more longing. We seek out pleasure and try to avoid pain, but no matter how well we do, we don’t find lasting happiness.
The happiness we seek isn’t in the things we seek. Lasting joy and peace can only be found in the moments between words, actions, and thoughts. In the spaces between objects and things.
Q: Life has been extremely difficult lately. What advice would you give?
ToddAnswers: Try not to carry life on your shoulders and just take it moment by moment. May you look back on it soon as a distant memory.
Q: I’m 49 and have not found peace yet. I have all the time in the world to meditate, eat healthy and exercise but it is hard to take the first step. Hoping I will get on the path of enlightenment and will start moving instead of being lazy and wishing for it. Any thoughts?ToddAnswers: Try not to carry all your ambitions and goals on your shoulders right now. Just focus on the first step and one step at a time. For me, that first step was meditation. That gave me the discipline, and clarity to achieve everything else.
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Is Suffering Because of the Ego or an Unhealed Part of Ourselves?
ToddAnswers: Both and neither. These feelings of fear are merely evolutionary traits we have developed to stay far away from tigers and the edges of cliffs.
Suffering is what tells us not to put our hands in the fire. But today, it is the news that stokes our fears. It is social media that tells us to suffer because we are not on a yacht right now. There can even be traumatic experiences that we must heal from in order to recenter ourselves and find peace.
But while all these external situations may cause fear and suffering, they still only exist in the mind. So freedom from suffering and fear lies ultimately in freedom from our ego. By becoming perpetually aware of this fact we can rise above the grips of our ego.
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