Alanna L.P.'s Blog, page 17

Magdalena Tarot Magazine Issue 3: The Empress is out now!

It’s here! The next issue of Magdalena Tarot Magazine is out now!

What does abundance mean to you? In this issue of Magdalena Tarot Magazine, we explore the archetype of The Empress as she teaches us about the power of manifestation. When you reach the place where you can successfully apply the understanding of the Magician to the wisdom of the High Priestess, you unlock the secret manifestation. This issue includes an in depth look at the Empress card, the Tarot Forecast for the month of Leo, the next installment of Where There is No Night and more. The submission guidelines for the next issue Magdalena Tarot Magazine: The Emperor due out when the Sun enters Virgo are also included. Get your copy here

https://www.amazon.com/gp/aw/d/B09BFPBMFK/ref=dbs_a_w_dp_b09bfpbmfk

What will your harvest look like?

And if you don’t have a kindle, there’s an app you can download to read my magazine on your phone!

A Shoutout from Fire and Fang Studios!

Well that was pretty awesome for Alpha Rae at Fire and Fang Sudiosto give a shout out for Where There is No Night! The next installation will be in the upcoming issue of #magdalenatarotmagazine.

Go to here to get your copy in the next couple of days. You can also purchase back issues if you are a first time reader or a busy loyal reader! And if you don’t have a kindle, there’s an app you can download to read my magazine on your phone!

Let’s share the fruits of the first harvest

Radhio: The Rune of Journeys

Radhio, the rune of journeys through life, this world and beyond. I spent some time working with this rune over the past week and the journey I’m on took on deeper shades of meaning.

I had premonitions all day that a discovery was on the horizon. I dreamed of finding my quartz Crystal point. It sits on my desk but I’d lost it in my dream. It was very clear and sparkly when I found it in my Dreamtime.

Then I’m waking time I had a strange walk to the convenient store. All the dogs were nervous and jumping in the neighborhood. A charming older man told me I’m beautiful, and the fire department was investigating an OD on the sidewalk.

I’d felt something odd in the atmosphere all week but Things always get weird when the sky is smoky.

Over the past week, I went back through the new chapter of my life that started with my move in February and all that followed. I turned the page and started my magazine. Mercury Retrograde grabbed me by my arm, literally pulled me down and told me to sit, stay and wait. And the page turned again when I broke my arm in May.

I was laid up for a good part of Mercury Retrograde due to breaking my arm again. My good friend died and I turned the page and found my best friend who I swore I’d never speak to again. Now we’re on a journey together again. My magazine survived my injury and it’s growing. And the journey continues.

Another aspect of this rune I was unfamiliar with was journey through the worlds and to the realm of the dead.

After runes class I was suddenly inspired to take a walk. I stopped preparing dinner and immediately went outside. I ended up under a rainbow. It was hard to see because we’ve had smoky skies but it brought revelations

I went walking under the rainbow in the park that used to be a cemetery meditating on Radiho when the song “Champaign Supernova” hit my playlist. Oasis was my friend who passed favorite song. The wind picked up and I became aware of my friend with me. It was nice to walk with him for a bit

I thanked him and another mutual deceased friend for their guidance. I feel their hands in reuniting me with my best friend, like they teamed up to push my best friend and I back together from beyond because nothing on this plane was strong enough to defeat my anger. I imagined them high fiving beyond together. I said hello to others that went before and thanked them for guiding me. I became aware of many things watching over us and I knew that we are never alone and all we have to do is shift our awareness to find the guidance we seek.

It was a mystical evening. The veil between the world fluttered in the sunset and the sunflowers and wild flowers in the neighborhood gardens bobbed their head along with the beat of radiho, the mystical rune of journeys both here and beyond.

FREE PROMOTIONAL! Magdalena Tarot Magazine Issue 3: Cancer 2021

Look at this fan mail! I’m so happy people love my magazine!

Download Magdalena Tarot Magazine Issue 3: The High Priestess for FREE on Amazon between today and 7/13 and see what everyone is talking about!

Go here to get your copy!

! And if you don’t have a Kindle, there’s an app you can download to read my magazine on your phone!

Do you trust your intuition? In this issue of Magdalena Tarot Magazine, we explore the archetype of the High Priestess as she teaches us to use our instincts in the application of Natural Law. This issue also includes the Tarot Forecast for the month of Cancer, a lesson on using the pendulum, the next installment of Where There is No Night and more. The submission guidelines for the next issue Magdalena Tarot Magazine: The Empress due out when the Sun enters Leo are also included. Listen to your gut and download this issue of Magdalena Tarot Magazine.

Magdalena Tarot Magazine Issue 2: The High Priestess Caner 2021 Out Now!

Do you trust your intuition? In this issue of Magdalena Tarot Magazine, we explore the archetype of the High Priestess as she teaches us to use our instincts in the application of Natural Law. This issue also includes the Tarot Forecast for the month of Cancer, a lesson on using the pendulum, the next installment of Where There is No Night and more. The submission guidelines for the next issue Magdalena Tarot Magazine: The Empress due out when the Sun enters Leo are also included. Listen to your gut and download this issue of Magdalena Tarot Magazine.

Download this issue here or subscribe to my newsletter here to get a free subscription!

Learning to Love Through Death

As I was working on my Twin Flame runner series, the Universe stepped in. Just as I declared that I was ready to run forever, I got pushed into Twin Flame Reunion …

I was at the hospital getting my stitches out from my surgery to fix my broken arm. The nurse had just stepped out of the room for a moment and I checked my phone. I had gotten a text message from a very close friend telling me one of our mutual friends had passed away. That was it’s own mystical experience within itself.

I spent a lot of time remembering my deceased friend and the good times we had together. And the more I thought about those memories, the more I remembered My Twin being there for so many of the adventures we shared.

It made me pause and wonder if anyone had told My Twin our friend had passed away. I knew the news was working it’s way down a long chain of friends but he’s not as connected to the people who felt the closest to our deceased friend as I am.

I looked at a picture from a camping tripped we’d all been on together and decided that My Twin needed to know.

So I swallowed my pride, unblocked him and reached out.

“Hey, did you hear our friend died?” I asked.

My Twin replied immediately.We talked about memories with our deceased friend for a bit. Then My Twin asked me how I was doing.

I cut him off.

“Look … I can’t talk to you right now. If our friend hadn’t died, you’d still be on block. I have a lot I want to say to you and when I figure it out, I’ll be in touch.”

And I spent days figuring out. I went back over things I’d written over the past few months. I went back over journal entries. I meditated. I prayed. Then I wrote a long letter and sent him the key points.

I came out to him as nonbinary and confessed I loved him.

He wanted to video chat so we did.

We had a video chat and we started talking things out. And our Twin Flame Reunion started.

When I decided to stop running, it was overwhelming at first. After our first video chat I felt like u could trust him enough to share the letter I wrote. I told my Twin I believe we’re Twin Flames. I told him I’ve lived him for close to 20 years, and although our bodies don’t match our genders sometimes do. I told him I hated him when I was running because he was mean to me and hurt me. I told him no more friend breakups but we gotta be ride or die or I can’t do this any more. I told him need boundaries because I love him too much to not have any. We apologized for hurting each other. We talked about how we love each and miss each other and how we need to see each other again because we have a lot to talk about in person.

He’s in Japan and I’m in Denver. The time difference is rough. We call each other and text all weekend but we lose track of each other when the workweek starts because of the time difference. I miss him during the week but it stops me from becoming codependent. And it gives me a break because this reunion feeling is so intense.

When we first started talking again I couldn’t sleep and I felt like I was on fire all the time. I felt our energy synching up again and I just had to ride through it. I was dizzy and giddy and confused. I missed him terribly. And I was dumbfounded I’d said everything that I’d wanted to say to him for years. And he didn’t push me away like I feared, he pulled me closer.

I don’t know if we’ll overcome our body mismatch but I know in my heart that we love each other deeply and we always have. The answer is love and it doesn’t matter what type. I accept him for who he is and if he can’t love my body, that’s OK.

Japan is still on lockdown so we don’t know when that will be. But when I see him again I will hug so hard. We’re planning a trip to Hawaii, a good meeting point. I have time to get a part time job now to afford the trip and since he’s still locked down.

I dream of seeing him every day. I know that it will be real one day.

I don’t really know what comes after that.

But I’m happy that I stopped running from my best friend.

And my friend who passed did us a solid by teaching us about how to love each other through his death.

R.I.P., buddy. You worked a healing miracle on us.

Magdalena Tarot Magazine Issue 2: Cancer 2021 out soon!

It’s a little later than usual but here is the cover reveal for Magdalena Tarot Magazine Issue 2: The High Priestess Cancer 2021. The stunning cover photography is by Bellawillow Photography The issue is currently with the graphic designer, Metaphysical Designs! I’m hoping that it will be out within the next couple of days. This issue was really hard to get together because I broke my arm. But I’m excited to say that it’s almost ready to go. The Tarot card that we are doing a deep dive on is the High Priestess. There are also predictions for the month of Cancer, The next installment of Where There is No Night along with an original Tarot card by Fire and Fang Studios. I included a couple of personal narrative pieces I threw in there to make up for the fact that I couldn’t do an Astrology Clock video because of my limited movement with my arm.

Be on the lookout for the next issue! Purchase it here along with back issues!

And if you don’t have a kindle, you can download an app to your phone so you can read the magazine!

My Twin Flame Reunion is Coming

https://loveconnection.org/twin-flame-reunion/

This says a lot more about what the Twin Flame Reunion phase looks like than I cam describe.

I am 100% certain this is what I’m experiencing right now with an old friend and I’m just filled with joy all the time. I don’t know when we can see each other because he’s in Japan and their still locked down but we keep track of each other’s waking and sleeping and talk a lot when we’re awake.

He knows I love him. He knows I think we’re Twin Flames. We’re recognizing how we’re stronger together and as I synch up with him again I feel like it’s inevitable that we are just at the beginning.

I had to work through a lot of fear. Diane Edwards is a A FIRE YouTube Tarot reader who convinced me not to walk away from this out of fear.

I don’t have any expectations for the future. I’m just happy my friend is back

There’s A Bad Moon on the Rise

Don’t fuck around with the tower

Guess I need to lay low for a while … call me superstitious but I got the Tower twice. Last time that happened I broke my arm again …. The Tower has also brought surprises like natural disasters, sudden moves and sudden deaths. I don’t fuck around with the Tower. Whenever I ignore it, I get myself in a mess that is usually unavoidable. Mercury Stations Direct on Saturday with Super Full Moon in Sagittarius on the Summer Solstice. Makes me think of that song “Well don’t go around tonight/Well it’s bound to take your life/There’s a bad moon on the rise”

The next issue of Magdalena Tarot Magazine has been a struggle putting together with my broken arm healing but it is ON TIME as of now. My staff is doing a great job helping me so I’ll have your lesson on The High Priestess, Predictions, the next chapter of Where There is No Night and more for you around Litha. Purchase on Amazon!

Twin Flames and Kundalini Awakenings Clearing My Twin Flame PART III

This is the third installment of a series of posts meant to help me tackle the task of clearing my Twin Flame and helping others who may be considered “Runners” that have also decided that they do not want to pursue the path to Reunion.

I’m going to recall this as best as I can because this was almost 20 years ago. I remember parts of the story like they happened an hour ago. Anything that seemed fuzzy I left out. There’s more details to this story than I can remember. But the important parts are here. This is the first time I’ve shared this experience publicly.

Some may disagree with me but I believe that Twin Flame Union strikes with a Kundalini awakening. I think this because I believe it happened to My Twin and I.

It was Derby week 2004. Derby festivities were underway in Louisville, KY, our hometown. I think it was Tuesday, April 26 —4 days before Beltain. I didn’t know what Beltain, (the fire festival celebrating the union of the god and goddess) is back then. It makes perfect sense that the timing was right to me now, but back then, I only felt that something strange was in the air.

It was warm and sunny; it was one of those days that heralds summer is just around the corner. Spring was in full bloom and the scent of fresh roses drifted on the back of the breeze.

It was a strange day. I’d gone to the Derby Parade float premier early in the day but I can’t remember who I went with. I remember I had a really good time though, so I wanted to take my Twin with me when I went back with my family.

We picked My Twin up from his dorm in the evening. My parents gave My Twin a Derby pin so he could get into the event for free. I will never know why he did this but he pushed the pin through his ear and repierced his ear. I vaguely remember a trickle of blood running down his neck but I’m not completely sure I remember that accurately. But I do remember that my parents, my sister and I were shocked. We got to the event and accepted My Twin did something crazy in the car and went into view the float preview.

My Twin wasn’t too impressed with the event so we ditched it and went to sit in the courtyard of a church with some homeless people. The sun was going down and we passed a cigarette back and forth in silence and looked into each other’s eyes. We didn’t say anything to each other. We sat like that often. We didn’t need words to enjoy being together.

We ended up back at his dorm room and got intoxicated. We were always on something back then because we felt trapped and wanted escape. The story I’m about to tell was probably enhanced by intoxication but the events transcend the effects of the substances.

I think the shift started with an energy ball exercise. At this point in our relationship, we knew we had a connection. We knew we could make things happen. We knew we could call each other in dreams or speak to each other without words. It was a curious game we played.

I learned how to do these things when I received what I would consider an awakening on the Summer Solstice of 1996. I was only 12 years old, but by the end of the night I had memories of a place and time that existed somewhere else and I knew that there was a boy I had to find who was there with me in those memories.

I met several other teens that had the memories of the same place and time, pockets of people often reincarnate together. But the first person I met who knew what I knew helped me discover more about these memories by teaching me the arts of telepathy and astral projection.

3D dwellers laughed in my face when I told them about the strange things I practiced because I wanted to hone my abilities. I wanted to know more about this place and time because it’s part of my soul story and part of my road to illumination. I felt that even as a 12 year old girl. But many didn’t understand.

Others were frightened of me.

Before I knew how to control these things, I was like a ripple in time when I walked into a room. There were some who were meant to come into the knowing and were awakened before my eyes. It was always messy and emotionally traumatic when I had an awakening on my hands.

Awakenings are rarely timed.

Then there were those who wanted to know, and asked me to awaken the abilities in them, but because of blockages, or because tha path is not meant for them yet, they couldn’t break through.

So by the time I got to college I was low key with my practices. It seemed like it only caused problems.

But my Twin was different. Our abilities fit together like puzzle pieces and we practiced with each other. We had seen glimmers of what we could do but the night of our first kiss. It was the first sign that we were capable of more than we could ever imagine.

We played games and flexed our mind muscles together. And the more we played, the stronger we got. I never worked with anyone as naturally as I worked with him.

Making an Energy Ball

That night we sat crisscross on his bed, held our hands out and started our warm up: creating an energy ball. We focused between our hands. We knew we were cooking when we felt our hands tingled. We expanded the ball and worked our hands around it, smoothing it out and holding it in place. Then we raised it over our heads and let it go. Some skeptics may say this is all psychosomatic. But whatever it was, it connected us energetically and fed our intentions.

We were bored and there was nothing to do so I proposed another idea: let’s try some mind reading exercises. I knew that when we were physically close, our connection was stronger so we laid down, wrapped our arms around each other and drifted into a trance.

Mind melding

“What color am I thinking of?” I asked My Twin when I was dropped out enough to feel our minds intertwined. I pictured a blue, electric streak vibrating in my mind.

“Blue,” he said.

I tried again. I saw a purple, electric streak vibrating in my mind. “Now what color am I thinking of?” I asked him.

“Purple,” My Twin replied.

I decided to kick it up a notch. I envisioned taking his hand and rising up into the night. The earth got smaller and smaller below us until we were flying through space.

“Where are we?” I asked him.

“Space,” My Twin replied.

Traveling through time and space

Still too easy for him.

The thought that he was who I was looking for crossed my mind but I wasn’t going to take that at face value so I decided to put him to the test again.

When I first started practicing astral projection, I met a boy I knew I would find someday. We met nightly on a beach where it was always twilight. The ocean was crystal clear and there were dolphins in the water that we swam with. They taught us about telepathy. When we were tired, we laid in a hammock on the porch of a beach shanty and held each other. We promised we’d find each other one day. Every night I disconnected my body from my mind in the world between waking and sleep and met this boy on the beach. I knew his name and I knew that he was connected to those memories out of time. The name I knew is his soul name and can’t be spoken here. But I knew it was a key. And when I found him, when I spoke his name, I knew he would know and understand.

The next place I took My Twin was to the beach from my soul travels. Astral projection was easy for him. Some would argue that we weren’t doing astral projection because I spoke to him, but honestly at this point, I don’t know if we were speaking out loud or with our minds.

The beach formed around us and I felt the sand beneath our toes. I asked My Twin to describe our surroundings.

“Oh, we’re on the beach,” he cooed. “There’s palm trees behind us and the ocean is in front of us and to the right there’s a white shack,” My Twin said.

And I knew.

It’s him. I can’t believe it’s him.

And then I spoke the name of the boy I was looking for. It was the key to unlock the mystery I was chasing.

At first he was confused. I said the name again and asked, “Is that your name?”

My Twin paused and stammered, “I … I don’t know.” It was like talking with someone with amnesia who is starting to remember who they are but can’t make sense out of fuzzy memories and familiar feelings.

Then from the depths of my spirit I called his name and commanded him to wake up.

My voice echoed and the program in the illusion broke. It was like glass breaking all around us. I saw crystal shards like broken pieces of a mirror raining down around us.

What I believe to be a kundalini awakening shattered everything around us.

We held tight to each other and floated in a dark vacuum.

“What did that feel like to you?” I asked.

Everything shattered

Shatter.

“Shatter,” he said.

“Oh my god,” I started to cry. “I finally found you. I’ve been looking for you for so long. Why didn’t you wake up?” I asked.

“Because I didn’t want to.” He said.

And then we started undressing and as our clothes came off I told him everything I knew about our past and about his name. As each article of clothing came off I peeled back another layer of the secret that I knew. But he was only partially awakened. He couldn’t remember the details, only the feeling. We stopped when we got to underwear, my bare breasts pressed to his chest as he held me on the threshold of Twin Flame Union. What would have happened if we’d gone farther? The question is like asking what would have happened if Adam and Eve decided to not eat the forbidden fruit.

Are we better off because we don’t know?

Or are we ignorant?

A sacrifice always comes with gaining knowledge.

But I’ll never know because we stopped before we got to Union. I don’t know if it was because he couldn’t remember all of what I told him, or we were afraid of what would come next.

Did we know that if we went any further that we would know something we weren’t ready to know?

Or did we come back to the third dimension and remember our body mismatch?

The truth is, I don’t know why we stopped. But we fell asleep half naked in each other’s arms.

The next morning I woke up, put my clothes on and left him, shocked at what had happened the night before. We didn’t speak for several days. Then he finally called me and I came over to his trashed dorm room. The blinds blocked out the day. I found disheveled and wrapped up in a blanket. He looked like he hadn’t gotten dressed or left his room in days.

He told me he didn’t accept what happened. He couldn’t explain it but he didn’t accept it.

It hurt because I knew something extraordinary had happened, but he wanted to stay in the 3D and there was nothing I could do about it. He simply didn’t want to know.

The choice: to know or not to know

I believe he still knows that there’s a unique connection. I believe that’s why he chased me when I turned my back on him every time he broke my heart. But if he doesn’t want to know the extent of our power in our potential, I can’t have him in my life. I don’t want to stay in Eden. I want to reach my full spiritual potential. I crave the knowledge we could unlock together. But I also know that because of his personality disorder, that knowledge is a poison apple.

And so I pursue the alchemical marriage alone. My Twin gave me the tools in our Twin Flame Awakening on my path to illumination. He has the same tools if he ever wants to progress beyond the 3D. But I fear that if he ever figured it, he wouldn’t use the ability for good and so I’ve given up and withdrawn. I’m a spiritual alchemist and I am on a quest to turn my soul to gold.

Despite the fact My Twin denies that something extraordinary was revealed to us that night, our connection grew stronger in the following years. And even now we know what the other is thinking or dreaming when we tap in. We manifested so many beautiful experiences together. I spent the most beautiful moments of my life with him. He helped make me who I am today and gave me the courage to roll the dice and live life like a game of Russian Roulette.

But the truth is, I’m still in love with him and will always be because he is My Twin. My desire for his flesh is too strong for him. And his desire to control me because of his personality disorder is too strong for me.

We simply cannot be in each other’s lives.

It’s too much for both of us.

That was my second awakening and I woke up into the Mystery of Twin Flame Union. I didn’t understand what happened until I was in my thirties, but now I know. I only recently figured it out after he broke my heart and I broke down every memory I had of him. I went back over our entire history to get to the bottom of what the hell the point of everything that happened between us was. And I believe it was the power of the kundalini awakening.

I miss My Twin. dearly. But I feel like whatever happened to us that night was the purpose for our meeting. Maybe next time on the other side when we’re free from our vessels again it will all make sense.

But for now, I tell this story that I have only told a few because in saying this, I move to clear his energy by airing our biggest secret because I have nothing to fear by speaking my truth any more.

And for all the Twin Flame runners who read this, know that it is OK to turn your back on your Twin. If you need to run far away, even if it’s across the world, do it. Because sometimes the Chaser does not deserve the Union that is possibly simply because they do not want to know.

Other Articles in My Twin Flame Series

Part I

Part II