Alanna L.P.'s Blog, page 13

Ace of Cups: Recognizing You are Loved

Mind, Body, Spirit Festival: Learning to be vulnerable and let my community care for me

Yesterday I got the Ace of Cups for my card to read at Body, Mind, Spirit. The Ace of Cups was an early Magdalena Tarot logo so I thought I would have a good day. And I did. But the card’s meaning wasn’t just about being prosperous, it was about feeling the love in my community and being cared for while I’m sick.

I didn’t feel good yesterday. I’ve been sick for over a month and reading at a psychic fair was something I wasn’t up to.

My doctor and I have been tracking my blood work for 2 years and it could be something very serious. I’ve made a lot of lifestyle changes but it’s not getting the numbers we want under control. Quite frankly, it’s scary. Sometimes I have so much energy and other times I’m so fatigued that all I can do is sleep. All week I was just trying to make it to Friday (the fair) so I could make it to Monday, (when I go back to work) and slide into a PTO day on Tuesday. I told myself to stay strong and keep my hand face on and just power through it.

But Friday morning my voice was shot and my energy was so low I had to cancel. The fair fined me for it and I committed to going Saturday if I had a clean COVID test. I took a COVID test, tested negative and masked to to read at the table I had paid $200 for before COVID (lol).

The fair was a beautiful experience while I had the energy to be there. I felt like I needed to be there to deliver messages because people need to hear messages of Hope right now. Gabriel stayed with me most of the day. My channel was so clear and her voice just came through. Gabriel even introduced herself to some of my clients, had me put down the cards and just channel, which is something I don’t usually do when I’m reading publicly. I had so many big messages to deliver. A lot of people cried. The messages just came through with love and beauty.

But I got static in my voice halfway through the day and it gave out. I’m used to the long hours at this fair and the payout is worth it when I’m in good health.

And yesterday was great for money. It kept flying out of customer’s hands and into mine, butI was praying for the customers to stop coming because I was so sick and I just wanted to go home.

But my community took care of me. I was fined for canceling on Friday because I had to go to the doctor, rest and recover my voice. But Saturday I found our someone paid for my fee for me!

My good friends, Ashton and Mona, stopped by and I took a break from reading to talk to them. They reminded me I’m loved and need to take care of myself. I started thinking about shutting down early but I was sad because no one would be using my space on Sunday (today).

Then another good friend, Zyrina, stopped by and offered to do a reading for me. This gave me a much needed break.

Zyrina’s reading was such a nice reading that I offered to give her my booth for Sunday. She was ecstatic, management for the fair was cool with it, and I had someone to break down my setup and deliver it to me at the end of the fair.

I got a ride home from my friend taking over my table and my boyfriend and I had pho and snuggles. Zee took over caring for me because I was weak and exhusted. But thanks to my community and my boyfriend, I went to sleep feeling loved and cared for.

So I made back my table, didn’t have to deal with that fine for Friday and gave someone the chance to read in my place on Sunday so I could rest up. Now I just have to make it to Tuesday when I have PTO scheduled and I can dedicate a full day to rest, relaxation and recovery.

So the Ace of Cups showed up to remind me that I am a loved and valued member of my community. And for this, I am thankful

I don’t know where things are going with my health. I’m considering even bigger life changes in hopes we can get these blood work numbers where they need to be. In the end, I think it will be good. I know I am loved and supported in my community as I work towards living a healthier, happier life so I can continue to be of service to my community.

When Trees Walked before Humans

I had a cool dream that some trees recited a poem to me about how they used to walk around before humans. They had the most interesting voices. They were windy but echoing and strong. Bassy. I’ve never heard anything like it. What a comforting dream in a stressful and uncertain time . I’m moving into a spiritual center that is in a house that does plant music so it may have inspired this dream. A friend shared this pic and it went with my dream so well I thought I’d share! I also included a pic of me with an ancient tree at Ise Shrine from my time in Japan.

As for Magdalena Tarot Magazine, my graphic designer didn’t get the last issue to me so until I can afford to pay a graphic designer to get the issues to me on time, the publication is on hold.

I’m super bummed because it was a wonderful publication with a strong, loyal following but it didn’t pay me enough to fund producing it. I I can’t finance it on my own so for now, you can read back issues here

I’m FINALLY in Print!

Picked up a copy of OUT FRONT magazine on a snowy walk with my boo last night. This month OUT FRONT started running a regular spirituality corner by me. I was able to finally see my horoscopes and Tarot forecast in print. It’s been a long journey but I’m finally in print. What a treat for the start of the year! I got soot on my nose moving some charcoal off the altar but the pic is still cute

My own magazine, Magdalena Tarot Magazine, is a bit late this month but it’s coming! Go to here to purchase the current issue of and catch with back issues. If don’t have a kindle, there’s an app you can download to read my magazine on your phone!

Excited to Join the Staff of OFM

Catch my horoscopes and more in OFM!

I’m so excited to join the staff of OFM! I’ll be writing horoscopes and discussing the spiritual side of queerness.

OFM and Magdalena Tarot are now partnered which is awesome news! 3/5 of my staff is queer and so am so it just made sense as queer publications supporting each other. Thanks to OFM for recognizing this and inviting to write about the craft through a queer lens. Next month I have 3 articles running so if you like Magdalena Tarot Magazine, check out OFM!

🎊To a Bright and Shiny New Years!🥂

Zee and I built a Happy New Year’s Altar to ring in 2022

It’s my birthday! Yay! So to all my dear friends, I wish you a very happy New Year!

How did your year end? Looking back, I have a lot to be thankful for.

2021 started with a big change! I wished my roommates good luck as they moved on to start a life together and I moved into a studio apartment by myself.

I named my new space “The Dorm Room” because I knew from the start it was a temporary stop. I just needed a corner in a creative side of town to stay while I picked a direction and shot for the future.

I dreamed up the idea for Magdalena Tarot Magazine in this room. I had my first video call with P.R.A.P. to get the band off the ground here too. I started the project converting Where There is No Night into Tarot card, which will lead to a graphic novel, in this room. But just like closing my yearbook on a good school year, it’s time to start making new memories!

I learned so much in 2022! And so I’m very grateful to 2021 for being kind to me. Even though the last week of the year was downright scary, I feel like it washed away pretty clean.

My biggest victory in 2021 was developing a 5 year plan!

I’m moving into a spiritualist church to be the caretaker in January. I will be managing a space where I can help metaphysical groups come together. I’ve already talked with a few groups who want to rent in the space for meetings and rituals. I’m excited to offer a place where people can worship and connect with Spirit. I feel called to be a community leader now. We’ll navigate this next virus wave as it comes.

Because I will be managing a sacred space and living there so my rent will be greatly reduced. Part of my 5-year plan is to pay off debt so I can afford to open a shop in the next 2-5 years. Magdalena Tower will have the brick-and-mortar storefront I dreamed of, which will also be a space open to spiritual communities. So this is a great opportunity to learn about the event space management side of my dream.

It’s a relief to FINALLY see the path forward to providing a meaningful spiritual service to the community manifesting. I’m starting to get a vision of what being a leader in the community by taking a closer look at what I can offer to help enrich the community. My 10 year plan involves a run for city council because enough is enough and if no is going to do anything, fuck it, I will do my best to step up for change.

For now, Emily Skyrocker and I are ready to rock politics with our band P.R.A.P. The band was a really big surprise in 2022. Emily and I took the idea and ran with it and things keep falling into place like this is destiny so these sistarrs are going to ride into the future keep spreading our message of radical political and social reform. We have some BIG news coming but we’re still not ready to spill the beans. Emily Skyrocker and I are going to blast light into 2022 with our music.

My relationship with Zee has also been a very pleasant surprise. He danced up to me at goth club right before Halloween and he was so cute that at first I thought, “No way, he’s not trying to dance with me.” But my friend, Zyrina encouraged me to dance with him. He stole a kiss and stole my heart. We’re mixing and matching our 3 year plan and it’s exciting that I’m with someone now who wants to build a foundation with me within the ENM framework and it’s exciting to be moving into a new year with a wonderful partner.

Another awesome thing happened too. I’ve formed a partnership with OFM (OUT FRONT Magazine). Magdalena Tarot Magazine has a queer friendly flavor because 3/5 of my staff is queer (myself included). Our readership is also heavily queer because our message about spiritual androgyny is the ultimate goal. Because OFM and Magdalena Tarot are queer publications, we connected and I will now be running horoscopes I write for OFM in Magdalena Tarot Magazine. So be sure to check out OFM Magazine at  https://www.outfrontmagazine.com/ and support our partner!

Of course, all my best friends, family and cowokers have been wonderful companions and cheerleaders over the past year. I love them so much and I feel so loved.

So moving into a new phase in my life is exciting. I feel like I’ll have a lot more responsibilities that I’m ready for and I’m excited to welcome in a new year full of potential and growth! 2021 spoiled me rotten and I’m ready to enjoy the bounties and continue to shine light into 2022.

HAPPY NEW YEAR! LOVE ALL OF YOU!

🎉Happy New Year Tarot Reading Sale! 🎉

What does the upcoming year hold for you? Today, through January 8, 2021, you can use the coupon HAPPYNEWYEAR22 to get 22.02% off on any Tarot reading in Magdalena Tarot’s Etsy Shop! Here’s to a bright and shiny new year!

Magdalena Tarot Magazine Issue 7: The Chariot Sagittarius 2021 Free Download

Hi everyone,

I’ve been really sick and my phone is broken so I haven’t hyped the free download this month. But if you would like to get a free copy of this upcoming issue, you can still download it from Amazon until 12/15! Happy reading!

Shoot for the stars this Sagittarius season and move forward with the Chariot! In this issue of Magdalena Tarot Magazine, we take an in depth look at the Chariot card, go over the astrology for the month of Sagittarius, a I Ching reading for the month is also included, as well as an erotic piece dedicated to the Aphrodite in honor of Venus retrograde, and the cation gets ready to kick off in Where There is No Night, chapter 6: The Two of Cups.

Let’s get ready to move into 2022 with the Chariot!

Venus Retrograde is coming

Venus has been popping up in my life a lot lately.For starters, the Venus card on my astrology clock keeps leaping off the wall.Two of my best pals, Amanda and Kara, came over tonight. we were talking about Venus Retrograde and Amanda found a title card from the Botticelli deck that featured the birth of Venus on my floor. I’ve been given an astrology column in Out Front Magazineso I’ve taken a deep dive into looking at Venus Retrograde. Venus entered shadow period on November 17, and I’m already feeling sexed up.I can only guess what kind of tricks and treats are coming our way from December 19, 2021 through January 29, 2022and this is why:I have a couple of lovers now. I wasn’t looking for a successful polyamorous experience but here it is again. And with getting back in touch with my free loving nature, I began embracing my sexuality in a way that I shunned for a long time.I was raised Catholic but threw off the repression of Catholic guilt and embraced my sexuality when I left the church freshman year of high school. I had a Satanist boyfriend and we did all kinds of outlandish things sexually because he and I were really horny, rebellious teens. We had a “fuck everything” attitude about the world and about life. So we did a lot of tabo sexual exploration that a lot of people didn’t try until college … or ever. I learned a lot about setting boundaries and protecting myself from sexual abuse from some of the situations I got in because of him. So sexual repression was something that I didn’t feel for most of my life. I oozed sex wherever I went in my teens. I loved being jail bait and I used sex as a way to control situations because someone secure in their sexuality is dominating. I was a walking Aphrodite — pushing the dress code until the envelope fell off the table at school, wearing lingerie as streetwear when I went out with my boyfriend when I was 17, winning best dressed but being vetoed because I was considered too “controversial”.I went around the world as an adult. I had lovers in different countries and different cities before I settled down with my ex husband (we married in a private pagan ceremony but it was never on paper).Before I left my ex, I’d leave a man’s bed in one town and go to a bed in another because I was always traveling and I loved having boyfriends I could snuggle up with when I rolled through town again. My mom said I “had a man in every port.”I thought I wanted monogamy when I settled down with my ex. I was engaged several times before but I was the one who couldn’t commit most of the time. I was too wild, too free.Then I met a wonderful, magical, imaginative man who captured my heart. I thought I could commit to him, but Venus tested us when guided me through a very powerful retrograde. She showed me that I will never be able to love just one person. And I have never loved just one person. It was difficult for me to accept. I didn’t accept it until I destroyed my relationship because I fell in love with a friend and his wife. Nothing good came out of that. There was a lot of lying and a lot of whispered phone calls and a lot of tears and anger and counseling sessions until I lost everyone and everything twisted up in my confusion. She showed me I’m different because we live in a world that only allows you to love ONE person and bisexual people are scorned. I was shamed by everyone who knew.ButI’m not monotheistic … and so it follows that I’m not monogamous. Once I learned that about myself, I’ve been very honest about my beliefs it’s turned a lot of potential partners away. Many people believe the patriarchal message that you MUST only love one person — that it’s not possible to have a couple of lovers. But I have never met one person can’t fit all my needs and I don’t want love to sour because a lover is only human and can only do so much.I get the benefit of traveling the Tarot each issue of Magdalena Tarot Magazine. It’s almost an initiatory process, which is why I wrote the text for the Tarot book that I’ve broken up in each issue. Magdalena Tarot Magazine Issue 5: The Hierophant was a hard issue for me … it brought up a lot of that shame from growing up Catholic and I had to get past that. But I didn’t realize that how by working with the Hierophant, it would open a door for me to embrace my sexuality again when I moved on to the Lovers.Magdalena Tarot Magazine Issue 6: The Lovers Scorpio 2021 brought with it a sexual awakening which was shocking because I thought I’d been there seen that. I was living a monastic kind of life for a while — studying the occult and focused on creating sacred art. I milked messages from the stars as a guiding light in a starless future. I was seriously contemplating entering a monastery.But then the Lovers card woke something up in me. All of a sudden two very attractive men began courting me at the same time. They couldn’t be more different than night and day. One is 13 years younger than me, the other is 10 years older than me. They’re both rockstars in their own way and I mean this literally, but so am I. It’s rare to meet someone rock star enough to be with me, so when I found two wonderful men that I adore (plus my long distance man who has been a wonderful campaign since the beginning of COVID), I didn’t want to choose. I told everyone I’m not a one man kind of woman and I need my freedom. And now I’m able to love all three of them at the same time and it’s lovely.Amanda and Kara helped me take pictures for my lovers tonight. I don’t give out pictures for free and the only pictures I do circulate are carefully curated boudoir pictures or tasteful nudes when gifted lingerie. If you’re my lover and you want pictures, you must gift me lingerie.I used to figure model in college. I had a clientele and I did art classes, private lessons and private group drawing sessions. It was a wonderful experience and I was a popular model because people found me classically beautiful and entertaining. I’ve traveled the world fire dancing and entertaining, I’ve worked in television — you couldn’t afford porn of me because I put a price on that a long time ago when I used to get offers that I never felt called to take — but I’ll do something beautiful for lingerie.If you’ve been following me for a while, you know that I’m a devotee of Aphrodite which is why I live a life of beauty. And as Venus retrograde in my home sign of Capricorn approaches, I find myself going back to the wild, sexy, free loving woman I was before I gave up on love. I’ve found myself revisiting issues from high school this past year. Sometimes it felt like going to high school as an adult and getting the chance to do things over with an adult mind.So here’s a treat of me wearing Green for Aprhodite, for the realm of Netchez and for a life dedicated to beauty, with love. As a dovotee of Aprhodite, I can only image what trick she has for this retrograde. And so an offering for a sweet, my dear goddess. Bless me with the knowledge of the art of love.XOXOXO,Alanna, L.P.Magdalena Tarot

2 Years After My Kickstarter …

About 2 years ago at this time I ran a Kickstarter to get money to hire an artist to draw Where There is No Night. I set a goal of $500 which raised enough money for me to hire Snow Torres to do the initial character designs. We came up with a mock cover but I ran out of money and had to abandon the project for a while.I finally decided to bite the bullet and invest my own money to get a fan base started and here we are, 6 chapters into the series and me heading a creative team that consists of me, Snow and Alpha Rae. I think I want to call our team “The Triumvirate of the Roses”. The mechanics of the team are working on creating story boards in the form of Tarot cards for a pitch. We have 6 completed cards and looking at them together really gives the story so much depth and meaning.Watching this project manifest has been a wild rid. And the more I open up to the possibilities this project holds, the more signs I get that the team has something special to share with the world. Honestly, I am so thankful that I’ve been blessed with creative vision and what I believe to the Divine guidance to eavesdrop on the whispers of the angels.All I can do is trust and have faith.So that’s been my MO lately.Today I was out to lunch with Seth Osmun and a waitress was staring at my shirt from across the room. I was wearing a prototype for a shirt I’m going to put out once I get the title of my series “Where There is No Night” done in some cool cyperpunk looking graffiti letters. The image that’s on the shirt is below. I think I posted pics of the prototype because I was really excited when I got it. But here it is againThe waitress came up to me and was like, “I hope this doesn’t sound weird but I’ve never seen that series before. What is it?” And I was like, “It’s my graphic novel.” The waitress got so excited and started jumping up and down. I gave her a business card and she offered to put some out for me. I’m starting to see an up tick in people who are getting interested in the story. I had a couple people buy all the editions of my magazine to read all the chapters of Where There is No Night that I have out so far. I’m glad the action in the story doesn’t get started until these upcoming chapters because it gave me time to get a good stack of back issues going to hook people in. I’m also excited my fashion line is starting to get attention too. I’ve sold several T-shirts this fall and it feels good that people like my designs and want to wear them. I wear my designs all the time so if they’re good enough for me, they’re good enough for the world lol. This is probably going to be the next Where There is No Night design along with the cover. I’m going to do a line of Where There is No Night shirts but I can’t do them until I get the letters done.I’m guessing I’ll have to get a different Etsy for my clothing line, Ripped Lace. I think I’ve got enough SEO data that makes me think the split will be successful.Anyway, I just wanted to share that because I thought it was exciting. I’ve invested A LOT of money in this project. I raised $500 two years ago to jump start this project and I keep the names of the people who donated on a vision board over my desk like I promised. Looking at what P.R.A.P. was able to do with raising money to get equipment to record a demo and looking at what’s happening with Where There is No Night, I can’t help but think that sometimes all you really do need is a little help from your friends.Thanks for believing in me, guys. Just know I believe in you too

P.R.A.P. : A Magdalena Tarot Music Project

Hi everyone, I want to encourage you to check out the newest addition to Magdalena Tarot: P.R.A.P.

What is P.R.A.P.? We’re an experimental electro-punk protest band from the future past, an alternate 80s cyberpunk universe that exists where Carter, not Reagan, won the 1984 election in a landslide. We are here to save your timeline and kick some ass.

If you want to learn more about P.R.A.P., go here to listen to our latest single, catch up on band news and buy merch!

BLAST OFF to the future past with P.R.A.P.!